Echoes of the Tide (Deep Waters #3)

Chapter 29

CHAPTER 29

H e could feel the tiny tremors going through her body. She’s terrified of what she saw in that tower, and frankly, so was he. He didn’t need more of a reason to hate her kind, but if he had seen that before he’d ever met her or Mira or Anya? He would never have been able to see them as anything other than animals.

There were varying degrees of every person. He knew that. Even his own people had those who grew too mad with power or all the other issues that he had seen in his own kind. Some people were born wrong. The only difference was that the People of Water took care of those with fractured minds.

The achromos clearly did not. They put all those people together, only compounding the issues, and giving them free rein to get even worse.

He hugged her closer to his chest, his hearts bleeding for her. She’d seen too much. Ace was strong. Stronger than most people he had met, but he understood that there was something rotten in that building. Something that could easily bleed into a soul and make it hard to focus on anything else. He was still thinking about it, too.

He’d seen them eating each other. He’d seen the bodies that were still on the floor, half chewed and half cooked. Even worse, on their way out, he had seen the countless bones with teeth marks on them. No creature was meant to eat its own kind, no matter the opportunity that arose.

So he took her to the only place that he knew would distract her. The only place that would give them both a bit of peace after the awful things that had happened.

He would bring her above.

The journey to the place he was thinking of was rather short. But the entire time he prayed to every god of the sea that he could name that there would be no storm above them. He wanted her to see the sun again. He wanted her to tilt her head up to the sky, watching the shadows of the clouds play across her features as she finally relaxed again. Just as she had the first time.

She deserved to feel the heat of the sun melt into her very bones so that maybe, just maybe, she could forget what they had just seen. Even just for a few moments. He wanted her to find peace.

So when he popped his head above the waves and saw the sun was shining, he felt every muscle in him sag with relief. Thank all the gods that they had listened to him. Because they both needed this.

Rotating his body, he tilted until he was on his back and she was stretched out across his belly. She could feel the sun on her back while he drew them ever closer to shore.

“Where are we going?” she asked sleepily.

“Once, a long time ago, the achromos moved to the very edge of the sea. The storms had drawn them here. It was where they would make their last stand against all the world that moved against them. For a while, they thought their new homes could withstand the power of the ocean and the storms that threatened their lives.” He felt his second set of lungs expand, holding themselves full of air so he remained buoyant as she braced herself on his chest and watched where they were headed. “But they were wrong. The homes were safe enough, but they still flooded. It was not a place where they could live forever. But it was here that the dream of living in the sea was built.”

He knew what she was seeing. He’d come here many times in his life. There were small buildings that were crumbling after the storms had ripped off their roofs. About twelve of them all clustered near the ocean. What she might not notice is there were at least twelve more under the water as well. The sea levels had risen so high that the houses had been swallowed whole. But that wasn’t what he wanted her to see, anyway.

This achromo settlement had a dock system that had somehow survived. It was a floating dock, and he wasn’t sure what they used it for, but there was a suggestion that many boats had once surrounded it. And as they approached, he was pleased to see it was still in use.

Breathing out a small sigh of relief, he headed in that direction.

“There used to be massive creatures who laid on top of these,” he told her, tilting to use his arm and webbed fingers to paddle them closer. “They weighed more than even one of my own kind. They were loud and constantly jostling to get on the floats.”

“What happened to them?”

“The same thing as the rest of the warm-blooded creatures who couldn’t live in the sea.” He grabbed onto the edge, helping her to the float and then palming her bottom to throw her up onto it. “They died. The storms made it impossible for them to find places to rest. I used to find their bones as a child.”

“Morbid.” She rolled onto her back, staring up at the bright blue sky and breathing a long sigh of relief. “I understand their need for rest, though. This is nice.”

“Your body is not built for swimming as long as mine is.”

Ace tilted her head to the side, watching him where he also rested. But his version of resting was letting the sea hold on to him and coiling his tail underneath the float. It was so easy for him to wrap himself around the worn wood and not move. For her? It was taxing on her body just to hold on to anything and not float away.

Still, she smiled at him. A soft expression that barely reached her eyes, but it was a start. “No, I don’t think my body will ever be as good as yours at swimming.”

Some soft emotion passed between them. She turned her face back to the sun, and he cushioned his head on his arm. Just watching her.

The sun played across her features, giving her natural warm glow a more earthy tone. The soft rounded edges of her cheeks made her look a little happier than she was. He could tell there was still stress straining her mind. The tightness at the edges of her eyes gave that away. But as he watched, the wrinkles on her forehead eased and her breathing evened out.

They were all good signs, but still not perfect. He was struggling to come up with a way to help her, a way to make it so that he could prove how much he wanted her to be happy.

Then she spoke.

“I still can’t believe that you don’t have someone waiting for you back at home,” she said quietly. “You have taken better care of me than anyone else in my life ever has. You give a shit about people. You make it seem so easy to just... do it.”

“Do what?”

“Take care of others.”

He breathed out a long sigh. “You don’t think you’re good at taking care of others?”

“It seems like everywhere I go, people die.”

Ah. That was the problem. Not that those people had lost their lives, or that he had killed them. She was afraid because she had been in the room, and everyone constantly seemed to die around her.

He reached out with one hand, catching hers in his. He held onto her, trying to thread his fingers through hers and only stopping when the pinch of his webs hurt. “You did not kill them.”

“If I didn’t walk into that room?—”

“He had the key, Ace. He was the person you were looking for, and you would have had to find him no matter what. If you hadn’t walked into that room, perhaps you would have found him elsewhere. He might have been surrounded by other people and forced to blend in again. He might never have gotten the opportunity for you to see how kind he was, and that he wasn’t the monster the others had become. There are so many other outcomes you are ignoring.”

A tear escaped her eye and trailed down the smoothness of that cheek he so adored.

“I know that,” she croaked. “Logically, I do. But it feels like everywhere I go, no matter what I do, I mess everything up.”

“I know that feeling.” He drew himself out of the water, enough so that he could look at her and not just her profile. “I have spent my entire life hiding who I really am. I have been the loudmouth. The male who goes out of his way to annoy everyone around him, because while they still like me for it, it keeps them all at arm’s length.”

She opened those gorgeous brown eyes again. Their gazes met, locked, and then she asked the question that nearly shattered him. “Why? Why do you think we do that?”

“Because we’re afraid if anyone sees who we really are, that they won’t like us. And what greater wound is there than to show someone who you really are and have them like you even less than the person you made up?”

She squeezed her eyes shut even harder. “Yeah. That would be terrible.”

No, that wasn’t the answer he wanted. He didn’t want her to retreat into her mind like this. Not when there was so much more he wanted to say.

With a flick of his tail, he landed on the float next to her. The entire thing tilted toward him, rolling her in his direction until he crawled up higher and slammed the whole thing back down into the water. A giant splash covered them with icy seawater, and she let out a little shriek of anger while sitting up.

Good enough. He’d wanted her full attention, and now he definitely had that.

Glaring at him, she crossed her arms over her chest that was once again covered in clinging fabric and far more distracting than she had any right to be. “Maketes!”

Prowling over to her, he forced her back down onto her back. With his forearms on either side of her, he caged her in with his body. There was nothing she could do now. She couldn’t look away from him, nor could she hide from the difficult feelings.

“I like you,” he said. Perhaps she needed him to be more direct. “I have seen much of who you really are. I have seen you in the face of bravery and fear. Every ounce of who you are only made me like you more, kefi. You have no need to fear that I will ever see something about you that I do not like, because even if I dislike it, it will only make me adore you more. Your flaws are just as beautiful as your perfections.”

Her eyes had rounded, widening with every single word. “Why would you say that?”

“Because I cannot imagine a life without an adventure by your side. The thought of you disliking anything about yourself makes me want to fight those thoughts. But I cannot fight you.” He leaned down and bumped her nose with his. “You are a beautiful creature, inside and out. You should hold no guilt for being who you really are, Ace. None in the slightest.”

She took a deep, shuddering breath. He could see the turmoil inside of her. Felt the way her body tensed as though the words she was going to say next were so difficult. They wound up stuck inside of her rather than releasing the way they needed to.

“I...” She swallowed. “I have spent a lot of my life pushing people away. Men, especially. When I was young, I didn’t like the way they teased me and made me feel lesser because I wasn’t as pretty as they wanted me to be. And then, as I got older, I was angry that they didn’t think I could do the same things they could do. I have spent my entire life trying to prove myself worthy to those who didn’t deserve it. And you are the first person I’ve found that it really matters what you think of me.”

He opened his mouth to reply, but she pressed those tiny fingers to his lips. He held his tongue as she continued.

“I am so honored that you have given me time to become braver. You have shown me what it is to not fear what someone will think of me, but just to trust that you believe in me and that you have my best interest at heart. I cannot tell you how healing it has been to be in your presence and to know that you’re going to stay. Even if I make a mistake.”

His hearts warmed in his chest. He wanted her to feel like that. He wanted her to know that he would see her mistakes, and he would swim through them with her.

Her hand curled around the back of his neck, drawing him ever closer. “But when are you going to tell me what kefi means?”

Rolling them so she could at least feel the sun on her back while they were here, he ran his hands up her thighs and relented. Perhaps she would think him too forward once he told her what it meant. Maybe she would think that he was too much for having called her this for such a long time, even before he had known she would stay.

“Kefi is a spirit of joy,” he murmured. “It is the feeling in your chest when you experience a passion for life and new things. The sensation of excitement, but even more than that. It is the true joy of adventure.”

He watched her eyes grow wider and grew ever more uncomfortable with her silence. He’d expected many reactions, but he hadn’t anticipated her remaining quiet. Anything would be better than this. Any word, any reaction, any look.

But then she blew out a long sigh and all the tension that had been riding her shoulders finally eased. “That suggests you see a lot when you look at me.”

He reached up and tucked a strand of her short hair behind her ear. “I see joy, Ace. That’s all I see when I look at you.”

She swallowed and then grinned down at him. The happiness in that smile was almost blinding.

“Oh, Maketes. I don’t know how I could ever live without you now. You wondrous, terrifying beast of a murderous creature. You have turned my world upside down.”

And then she leaned down to kiss him, lingering long and quiet as they sought peace in each other’s lips. He’d never been happier.

Because he was finding that he was right. She was his joy.