Falling for Ezra Thomas (Life With the Thomas Brothers #4)

17. Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen

Lorelai

Dear Lorelai,

Okay, I got the full story and I think you’re going to love it. Jacob has ADHD, and during high school he didn’t do so well. He failed a lot, and people thought he was kind of an idiot. He was good at football, but that was about it. So he got paired up with Delilah for a senior science project. Apparently she was something like the unobtainable girl. Everyone wanted to date her, but she was too quiet and standoffish because she lost her father.

Anyway, they got paired up and this crazy thing happened. She opened up to him, which was unusual because she wouldn’t even talk to her own mother about her grief. He was just the person she needed to feel safe and able to express those feelings, and for him, she settled his nerves and helped him focus. One thing led to another, and they fell in love. He plans to propose to her after basic training.

He tells the story so much better. I hope I didn’t disappoint with my recap.

I thought I’d open with that to get you all warm and fuzzy inside before I drop the bomb on you. Sometimes we make plans and bulldoze ahead without prayer to guide us. Ever since I can remember, you’ve been hard-driven to become a veterinarian. I actually do think that’s what you love, but there are a lot of ways to treat animals without working for someone else. Owning your own clinic is one of them, but there are others options and other career paths you can choose.

I will always support you whatever you do, but I would pray and be patient. Maybe even research some things you can do outside of the ordinary. You might be surprised. Above all, pray Lorelai. You know where our strength comes from and what happens when we lose our trust.

There are great things ahead for you. I know it, but only time will show you what they are. I’m glad you’re working for Mom and Aunt Tress. I’m positive you’ll have a great time while you search for what will be fulfilling work. Don’t tell anyone, but I have a secret candy stash in the break room. Look on the bookcase behind the top shelf cookbooks. It’s in a paper bag, but don’t let Rose know it’s there or she’ll throw it away.

As for the getting to know you stages of dating, yeah, I’m glad we can skip that too. Still, there are things I want to share with you. Here’s one no one else knows. I mean no one. Not Viv, not Beck. No one.

I hate hockey.

Yep. I said it. At least, I used to. It’s grown on me, but I only joined the team because it was something I could do with Beck. When I got the captain’s position, I almost turned it down, then I worried that if they offered it to Beck, he’d see himself as second best. It was probably a weird take, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d feel like second fiddle to me. In truth, I think he probably did, anyway. At least, until Vivien.

I guess I ended up liking it okay. It was fun getting into trouble with him all the time, but if not for him, I never would have played. It only makes his injury worse, really. He lost something he really wanted, while I never wanted any part of it.

It’s crazy how life works out, isn’t it?

Well, I’m running short on time and need to get some sleep but I’ll leave you with this. We had to do the OC spray today, and I am here to tell you that it's true. It sucks.

I will be praying for you and I hope that you find some clarity with your career too. Please pray that I continue to do well. It gets harder every day, but imagining your beautiful face sure makes it easier.

Love always,

Ezra

The front door of Sweet and Salty dings, and I am reminded I’m at work. Sort of. I know I can pretty much do what I want, but I am here to help. Ella walks in and smiles. She comes in every morning, I’m told, and orders the same thing.

“Good morning,” she says with her sweet, upbeat way.

“Morning. How are you?” I scoot her order across the counter and wipe up the crumbs I left behind.

“A little tired, but good. You have time to chat?” She motions toward the corner booth that she and Silas often occupy. There are no other customers at the moment, so I shrug and drop my cleaning rag. I can’t help snatching a cinnamon roll on the way to meet her.

She slides into the booth and sighs with her first sip of coffee. “Don’t tell, but you make it better.”

I giggle, knowing well that I’m the worst with the machine. She’s trying to keep me in good spirits, which I appreciate more than she can know.

“I think I’m finally getting the hang of all the equipment around here, but it’s still intimidating.”

“You’re literally a doctor, and the espresso machine intimidates you?” She grins and sips again.

“Don’t underestimate that thing’s ability to malfunction. Anyway, I think Mrs. Thomas will have me doing deliveries next week. She’s catering some big to-do in the city, which should be fun. I can definitely set up tables and completely avoid the coffee machines.”

Ella rolls her eyes. “So, I wanted to talk to you about something if it’s okay?”

“Sure, shoot.”

“I know everyone has opinions about what you should do. Vivien is really pushing opening your own clinic, and Mrs. Thomas is offering you a permanent job, but I just wanted to tell you…” She bites her lip, falling back into her shyness.

“It’s okay. Nothing you say will offend me or upset me. I’m honestly open to all opinions right now.”

“See, that’s the thing. I think you should tune us all out and take more time to pray and think. Silas went about his trip to Romania the wrong way, but ultimately, it did help him realize a lot about himself. Trying to force himself to become an accountant with his father made him miserable, and it wasn’t until Baker offered him the ranch job that he finally felt… right, I guess you’d say.”

I lean back in the booth and try to take what she says to heart. “I’m honestly not sure being a veterinarian is my true calling, at least, not the way I’ve gone about it. Actually, I just finished reading a letter from Ezra, and he made a few points I hadn’t thought about.”

“Like what?”

“Like thinking outside the box. Looking at work that involves animals, even medicine, but is less traditional. I’m not sure what that might be, but I’m willing to look into it.”

“You don’t have to make major decisions right now, though. Keep that in mind. You have a job here, a family that supports you, friends who love you, and it’s okay to not have all the answers right now.”

I love talking with Ella this way. For some reason, it feels like talking to my sister. I suppose one day it’s possible we will be sisters, but right now, I’m glad to have her as a friend.

I sigh and move to change the subject. “How is your father doing?”

Her smile grows, and she nibbles her breakfast. “He’s actually doing great. It turns out, he’s more enriched at the center and has made a lot of friends. I’ve seen so much improvement, and Abby is doing great. With her newfound freedom, she’s really blossoming.”

“I’m glad to hear that, and that she’s doing well.”

“Hey, I have an idea. Why don’t you come with me to the ranch when you get off? I usually help Silas with some of the fun stuff at the end of the day, and maybe it’ll take your mind off some things?”

I consider her offer and chew my lip. “What kinds of things?”

“Oh, just feeding the cutest cows ever. They got mini cows, and I’m totally obsessed. Seriously, you need to come with me and see them.” She’s so excited, I can’t say no.

“Oh, all right. I’m off at three. Will that work?”

“Absolutely. I’ll pick you up. Meanwhile, I better get back to studying.” She gathers her things and hugs me over the table. “I’ll see you soon. You’ll love it, I promise.”

I’m sure I will. Giving cows hugs might be exactly what I need to feel better about everything.

Yep. Absolutely. Hugging cows was everything I had hoped it would be and more. Silas laughs as I wrap my arms around a big old mama and squeeze her as hard as I can. She keeps chewing as if I don’t even exist, and it soothes my soul in ways I can’t describe. Hugging cows should be at the top of every therapist’s list.

“Thank you so much for letting me come and help,” I say.

“Glad to be of service. After all, you were a big help when that baby got stuck in the mud. The least we can do is let you snuggle bovines until your heart’s content.” Silas grins and leans against his truck.

“Well, I guess my heart is as content as it can be right now. What do we do next?”

“Nothing. I’m all done, just gotta get you ladies home so I can shower,” Silas says.

“Actually, do you mind if I drop by and hang out for a while?” I ask.

“Don’t mind at all. Actually, Novan will be there too. He’s avoiding his new neighbor, whatever that means.” Silas shrugs, but where Novan is concerned, you can never guess what he’s thinking. He’s sweet as can be, but has a grouchy streak that can scare off even the most dauntless of human beings. Those times, he's even worse than Beck.

On the ride to the town house, Ella fills Silas in on her day while I stare out the window. I know once Ezra finishes basic training, we can pick up where we left off, but I miss him. I can’t imagine how awful it would be for him to have left without us working through everything first. I’d be stuck wondering if the kiss meant nothing to him, rather than worrying what our future might hold.

By the time we reach the town house, I’ve gone over every possible scenario and have come to a single conclusion. No matter what comes, I know I have so many friends and family who care about me—enough that they show up at my present place of employment, bring me to pet cows, and tolerate my total silence. They’re going out of their way to make sure I’m secure, and it means more to me than they can know.

Novan’s car is parked in front of the town house beside Rafe’s. The other boys are nowhere to be found, which might be a good thing. Lev and Mav are darling, but I’m beginning to feel a little down again. I don’t need to bring the Thomas boys into that depression with me by reminding them their brother is off doing things they’d rather he didn’t.

“You sure you two lovely ladies want to hang around with three boring, moody guys?” Silas asks with a glint in his eyes.

“Sure, why not? We can have a pouting contest.” I push open my car door while Ella laughs.

Inside, Rafe and Novan are debating the finer details of chair arrangement while playing video games. When the door shuts behind us, both brothers nod and grunt.

“Really? Two pretty ladies walk in with me, and that’s all you two have to say?” Silas asks.

They both glance up and grin before standing to give us their seats. “Forgive us,” Novan says. “We thought it was just Silas and his foul farm scent. You hungry?”

“I could eat,” Ella admits with a shrug.

“Leftover pizza on the counter.” Rafe looks over at me and adds, “None of that pineapple trash Vivien likes.”

“Thank goodness for that,” I say and head to the kitchen. “I’m gonna run to the restroom first.” I’m met with another few grunts as I jog up the stairs to the main bathroom. I pass Beck’s room, then Rafe’s before ending in the hall in front of Ezra’s. His door was left wide open, revealing a neatly made bed, his hockey bag against the wall, and a pair of shoes tucked beside his dresser.

I swallow and my heart sinks. It was probably a bad idea to come to the town house, but going home to my empty apartment is worse. At least this way, I’m around people who care about me. Most likely, Beck and Vivien will be around soon. Inhaling a deep breath, I intend to go to the bathroom but my feet take me into Ezra’s private space. Like Beck, he has a Denver Dragons’ hockey team poster on his wall that’s been there since they moved into the town house just after graduation.

On his dresser are several framed pictures, mostly him with his family, but also a few of him with Vivien. I’m just about to exit and end the torture when a more familiar face catches my eye. It’s me and Ezra sitting on a bench down by the lake, the same one we vacationed at many times when we were young. I must have said or done something funny, because Ezra is laughing while I stare at him with a wide grin. It’s just the two of us, and the moment—or maybe the person in the picture with him—was important enough for him to frame it and put it in a place where he would see it every day.

Again, I swallow the ball of emotion building in my throat.

“You okay?” Novan’s soft tone brings me back to reality and I clear my throat.

“Yeah, I’m okay.”

“You’re not, but it’s okay. Gimme a hug, Loreybear.”

My voice cracks and a sob breaks free the second I land in Novan’s wide-stretched arms. He hugs me tight and lets me cry until I even out and things begin to feel okay again. Eventually, he releases me and brushes my hair behind my ear.

“It’s gonna be okay. My brother might have been a lug head about joining the Army and keeping it a secret, but he was thinking with his whole brain when he pursued you. He’s not dumb enough to let you go, so be patient and take it one day at a time.”

I nod and take it to heart. He’s not the first person to remind me that taking things day by day is what’s best right now. If I can only convince myself that I don’t need a grand plan, then maybe, just maybe, things might start looking up again.