Fangs of Fate (Untish #1)

Chapter 37

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

TATE

My hands were still numb and clammy. I took several shallow, rapid breaths trying to get as much oxygen as possible. I was moving. They led me down this hallway, a turn here, a turn there. It was a labyrinth. My feet were moving but I wasn’t really sure where I was going or where I’d been. Someone said something—instructions? The circuit was just ahead. I was shoved inside and numbly searched for a seat.

The train car was packed. Excitement stirred on many young faces. Only a few looked unsure or regretful. None mirrored my expression.

I moved toward the next connecting car, also full. This one noisier than the last and mostly full of males who were quite literally arm wrestling over the seat cushions. I continued on through the testosterone-filled air and worked my way to the exit door. Perhaps normally I’d have minded the ogling eyes, the jeers, the whispers. Now? I felt nothing; no annoyance, anger, or indignity. I was empty.

After moving through five cars that held roughly a hundred and fifty dokimoses and arches, I finally found a half-full one and took an available seat at the back in an empty row. I fumbled with the seat belt, trying to close it.

Soft brown eyes filled with pain: Fletch’s eyes.

“I’m so sorry.” Some of his final words.

They changed everything.

They meant that he had in fact betrayed The Glenn. That in some twisted way, Luina was in fact exercising justice. It didn’t feel right though. Fletch wasn’t a bad guy and I knew if he truly had betrayed the Glenn, there had to have been a good reason. I just wished I knew what it was. The car jostled and I swayed with the movement. We were moving. I could see several other dokimoses across from me, some sat next to me, all strapped down in their seats. My peripheral told me this too had become a full car.

“I can’t believe we’re here. I mean, I knew today would come, but damn it’s actually here!” a female voice squealed, getting higher pitched with every word. “We’re finally doing something important, making a difference, protecting the future!” So much for being left alone to my thoughts.

“Please, I knew I’d end up here. It’s what I was made for,” a male answered.

“Well, I wasn’t sure. But I’m glad I did. My brother joined the cause last year and my sister several years prior. My father and mother are both still serving, high-ranking officers and all.”

“You don’t say?” the male sarcastically replied.

Fantastic, these two knew each other.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ve said it before but come on! It’s so different to live this reality. I mean we all knew serving was required and I always wanted to er…guard, protect. I just never pictured it being like this, so raw and exposed. So thrilling! I thought I’d be stuck within the confines of the sacred, but here I am.” She sighed. “Still, I’m surprised since I don’t have that much self-restraint.”

“You don’t say,” the male responded, his voice dry but also offered a note of fondness. Gross. Just get a room already.

“I know, I look all put-together with my pristine braids and no makeup motto, but deep down I love adventure. The idea of being a traveling guardian—” she coughed, as if embarrassed by her words.

Traveling guardian?

“I mean, guaraman, it’s just something I’ve dreamed of. A real-life protector. No dusty books for me!” The chatterbox continued. “I mean, I love research and learning, but have you ever spent that much time in a library? Boring ,” she drew out the last word and then ended with a snort. The male grunted in response. Her polar opposite in every way.

“What about you?”

“Vala, she may not?—”

“No one wants to be alone, not truly,” she cut him off.

They were talking to me I realized.

I pulled my eyes up from the floor and assessed these two for the first time. A female, nearly six feet tall, sat across from me. Her dark skin complemented the blue-black uniform. Her hair was, as she had said, divided into several delicate braids, its dark color highlighting the blue undertones of the shirt she wore. Even without makeup, her face was feminine and delicate.A rhinestone nose ring sporting a diamond graced her left nostril. She raised her brows at me, clearly waiting for an answer. What had she asked?

“You do know how to speak, don’t you? Or are you just not much of a talker? See you would be perrrfect for research. I mean those librarians are all like, ‘shhhh’ and ‘no talking’ and oh my gosh, it would just be impossible for me to do well there.”

“You don’t say,” the male next to her spoke. His tan skin was accented by sandy red-brown hair that was buzzed, giving him a stern appearance. A standard issue guaraman if I’d ever met one.

“ Ha-ha ,” she side-eyed the male. “I know I talk a lot but why not? We have hours of traveling before we get to our destination and I’m all about the chitchat and expressing myself. So much better than thinking about how we’re in a tin can buried underground with a bunch of vampires and like, no food,” Vala—I gathered—finished before visibly shuttering. “So, why’d you join, honey?” She was talking to me again.

She reminded me of Shae. Pain blossomed in my chest. So much had changed.

“I uh, was enlisted after a correction hearing.” To my utter surprise, Vala looked speechless. It didn’t last long though.

“So, you mean you didn’t want to join? They like forced you on here? They can actually do that!”

“I just had other plans.” I owed her nothing, no explanation or friendly conversation. I leaned back against the seat and tried to close my eyes. My head was pounding, and the bright lights were aggravating the pain.

“I don’t understand you. I mean, my parents are always going on and on about what an honor serving is. I mean, we’re like living in thee era. The vamps are getting more and more sophisticated. My mother is a scientist, she’s been telling me that President Dale is really making some breakthroughs and is pushing forward, challenging nature. I mean, now of all times to be a guardian and protect the whole, I’m honored.”

“Vala.” The male gave her a stern look. He fidgeted, looking unnerved.

“OK, Jared, message received.” Vala rolled her eyes. “My mother is an inspiration. Nothing wrong with speaking about her.” She leveled a challenging look at Jared.

“You know,” her attention returned to me as she spoke, “she started out just like us and then moved throughout the ranks. She then found her passion in science and turns out she’s like really smart. So, she’s a head scientist for?—”

“Uh-hem,” Jared cleared his throat. “You look really nice today.”

Vala blushed a bit, before grabbing a stray braid and twisting it around her finger. “Say more.” She lowered her face to her palm, resting her elbow on her lap. Ever the lovesick puppy.

I tried to tune them both out. I didn’t need to know the personal history of these two.

“Oh, you find me entertaining alright, Jared darling.”

“I do?”

“Hmmm. We both know I’m the most fun you’ve had and will ever have.”

Great, now they were openly flirting. I tried to focus on the hum of the circuit. It would be eighteen hours before we stopped at a settlement for the night; I guess they don’t like the idea of hungry vampires taking desperate measures while contained in a tin can.I could survive it. Besides, what did it matter? Whether or not I had to listen to this childish flirting or sit here in the quiet. This was my punishment. Perhaps I deserved to have happiness rubbed in my face. Perhaps, it would teach me to listen.

And so, I sat there, quiet and listening. For hours.

I’d managed to sleep for some of it, how much I wasn’t sure. Vala and Jared talked, flirted, and made out the rest of the time. I’d learned that Vala was twenty, she’d chosen to join early by a year. She’d gotten straight A’s in high school English but she struggled in math. Her mother sounded like a classic control freak who insisted she follow in her steps, just like her older sister, Jane, had—Jane, who was now serving at the research institute. I also learned that, even though I found Vala’s insistent chattering annoying, I liked her spirit. She seemed to be upbeat even though her childhood home sounded more like a competitive performance-based boot camp. She apparently was good with an arrow and had good aim with a rifle. She’d taken karate religiously and had extensive swordsmanship training. All things the guara loved, which is why her father put her in those activities since she was three . Way too young if you ask me, but somehow Vala seemed to be thriving.

Jared, on the other hand, only contributed a few sentences here or there and mostly communicated with grunts or sighs. He reminded me a bit of Tim when he did speak.

The thought sent a pang of regret through me. Tim would never know what became of me. He wouldn't know I didn't willingly just dump him. Or had I? I didn’t fight as I was dragged onto the circuit. I could’ve thrown a punch or tried running.

Then again, what did it matter? Lately, the only actions that mattered were the ones I made without knowing. Going home to look for Fletch. Being brought in for questioning. Hell, losing my mother and accepting Fletch’s guardianship. Perhaps if I had insisted that I’d be alright on my own at nineteen, Fletch would have traveled to the EO like he had planned and became a professor over there. He could have been safe. So much of this was unknowingly my fault.

I clenched my jaw. This whole life seemed like a cruel joke. Like somehow in my infancy, I pissed Mother Blood off and was paying for it with my life and those I cared for.

Perhaps I was being vain in thinking I was the reason for their deaths, that I had that big of an impact, and yet, I felt guilt from it all. They were gone. And I was here. A guaraman.

All I ever wanted was to make a difference. Now I wished I’d never touched a single life, never altered anyone’s path.

My life was an utter shit show. Everything I believed in and thought I knew was wrong. Gari claimed to be taking humans to President Dale, this violated the guara’s own laws. Unlikely. Fletch and my mother were alleged traitors. Unthinkable.

Fletcher was gone. This was the largest impossibility of them all. My fingers were twitching and my stomach felt like it was about to start eating my insides. I should have eaten this morning, but I couldn't stand the thought of putting anything down my throat.

Jared and Vala continued their bantering, mostly composed of Jared’s grunting and Vala’s interpreting his meaning and then rambling on more. If we didn't get there soon, I might actually throw up. The car jolted a little bit as the brakes sounded. We were slowing down.

“Alright, everyone listen up.” A large male stood at the front of the car, projecting his voice in an amplifier. “I’m Dux Harder.”

Vala snickered and Jared rolled his eyes. They both were very mature. Not.

“Quiet please, children .” Dux Harder leveled a glare in our direction. “We will be at the Wassenvine settlement soon. Upon arrival, we will be meeting up with Dux Shaully and his team. They will continue with you onto the Eastern Outpost as your commanding officers. When we reach the settlement, you will behave according to the guara rules. You may enjoy food, shelter, and consensual sex if you’d like, however, you will not fight or act in any manner that disgraces the tattoo in which you bear. You will be departing tomorrow morning. This means you need to ensure you take your packs and weapons with you upon departure. We’ll be there soon,” Dux Harder finished before sauntering back toward the front where the duxes’ quarters were. I bet they had luxurious chairs and better airflow up there.

“We’ll be there soon, Jared!” Vala squealed. “And as long as it’s ‘consensual’,” she mocked Dux Harder, “it should be fun. And for my sake, I do hope it’s long.”

Jared blushed at this. For all his tough male persona, he apparently was a bit of a prude. Figures.

The circuit slowed further and then stopped completely. The circuit hummed with mechanical sounds as steam was released, and everyone began to unclip their harnesses and stand. They stretched out their long limbs, Vala pretending to lose her balance and falling into Jared’s arms. It was my turn to roll my eyes. The doors opened and the personnel began spilling out into the evening air. It was crisp and refreshing compared to the stuffy train car.

“You coming?” Vala looked at me pointedly. I hadn’t moved since the circuit had stopped and our car was now practically empty.

“Yes.” I stood and then reached above in the compartment. A standard-issue backpack was there along with a rifle. Just great, now I was supposed to carry this ridiculous pack and symbol of the guara. The symbol of death.

I sighed and slung the pack over my back before shouldering the rifle. Vala and Jared stepped out of the circuit first and to my surprise, they paused waiting for me to catch up. Vala hooked her left arm through mine and placed a hand on Jared’s shoulder, linking the three of us.

“Well, you two, we’re here and I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to have some fun. Once we’re at the EO it will all be prasinos and rules blah, blah, blah. Let’s party!” She launched us forward in the direction of a pub.

“I uh, think I might just go find a room and a cot.” I tried to carefully pry myself from her, but her arm tightened.

“Uh-uh, nope. Not after you listened to me share my soul and learned all my secrets. All I know about you is that you’re in a bad mood, don’t want to be here, and apparently have no social skills. That or you don’t like to talk.”

“Val,” Jared spoke, using his pet name for her, “maybe she just doesn’t like us. Besides, I thought you wanted to have some alone time?” He cleared his throat at the end of his sentence.

“Hush, Jared. My sister told me that if you want to do more than just survive prasinos, you need friends. And what can I say, I’m a sucker for a charity case.” Vala dragged us both behind her in the direction of the pub. We entered through a double sliding glass door and found the room packed.

“I don’t think there’s any room, so I think I’ll just?—”

“Oh no,” Vala cut me off, “no chickening out now.” She stood on her tiptoes, surveying the room “There! I see an empty table, let’s move, gang.”

Gang? Who did she think we were?

I sighed heavily; I suppose sitting with these idiots would help pass time more than lying awake on a cot would.

She secured a small table, more of a barrel really, with stools around it and plopped down. She patted the ones next to her and Jared took a seat, I followed suit. A server dropped off a bottle of wine and three glasses.

“So, sweet cheeks, what’s your name?” Vala asked, pouring herself a full glass.

“Excuse me?” This girl was something else.

Jared filled his cup and began to drink.

“Yeah, I mean I’m sure you’ve gathered my name is Vala, this oaf here is Jared—I’ve yet to ascertain his value in a certain area, if you know what I mean.” She winked at me as Jared choked on his wine, spattering it across the table and some landing on Vala’s lap. She shot him a glare before returning her focus to me.

“I, uh, my name is Tate.”

“Tate, nice name. Tell me about yourself, Tate.” She placed one elbow on the table and leaned into it.

“Well, as you know I’m here not by choice, I’m an only child and…” Both my parents are dead. That made for great table conversation, not. “Pass me the wine.”

Jared obliged. I lifted the bottle straight to my lips and began to pull deep drags from it. Decorum be damned.

“Woah, slow down there, cowgirl. There’s plenty for all.” Vala reached for the bottle, but I stopped her outstretched hand with my free one.

“Nice reflexes! See Jared, she’ll be a nice addition to our party.” I emptied the bottle and dropped it to the floor. It shattered upon impact.

“If not a messy addition…” Jared clearly was disgruntled. I guess he wanted more.

“Noted, you’re not into any messy kinks.” Vala winked at him.

Jared’s jaw dropped before immediately shaking his head and standing up. “I’ll, uh, go get more,” he mumbled under his breath.

“I’m not sure I understand the dynamics of you two.” I turned to focus on Vala. The bloodwine starting to fill my stomach and give me a nice buzz.

“What’s to understand? He’s trying to get me to go to bed with him and I might, but until then I find you can learn a lot about a person by just talking and testing the boundaries with diction, and then analyzing their responses.” She leaned in. “Not to mention, it makes for good foreplay.”

I looked at her, really looked into her chocolate eyes. They were so similar to the color of Fletch’s eyes. “You remind me of someone.”

Fletch’s eyes were soft when he laughed, a flashback to him on the couch drunk on aged bloodwine and rambling on about the Untish Tribe. The charred remains clumped on the floor…

I shook my head. “I need more wine.”

Jared returned in perfect time with three full pitchers, not bottles. As if that’d stop me. I grabbed a pitcher.

“Thank you, Jared.” Lifting it to my lips I began to gulp it down. I needed to lose consciousness. I couldn’t think about Fletch or what happened in the glass room for another moment. Bloodwine began to drip down both sides of my cheeks and coat my shirt.

“Slow down there, girl. There’s plenty, I promise,” Vala’s voice began to cut through the sound of my gulping.

“Val, if she wants to down it, let her. Maybe we’ll actually learn more about this lost cause that way.”

“Shut up, Jared. Good to note you don’t consider a drunk female a compromised one and plan to take advantage.”

“That is not what I?—”

“Just shut it.”

The pitcher finally ran dry. I placed it on the table with a thud and used my sleeve to wipe at my face. Both Vala and Jared were staring at me, eyes wide.

“What?”

“Nothing, you just, uh, must be hungry.” Vala noticed the spatters of bloodwine coating the barrel.

“Something like that.”

“You were telling us about you. You mentioned I reminded you of someone?” Even through the lightheaded haze taking over, Fletch’s agonizing cries haunted me. His last apology and weird goodbye played through my head. I needed more wine, I needed to forget.

“Nope. Pass me the pitcher.” I reached for it, but Vala’s hand shot out and stopped me.

“You know, I get drinking to numb and that you don’t want to be here, and don’t get me wrong I’m a party girl through and through?—”

“Good to know,” Jared mumbled.

“Shut up, Jared.” She gave him a side glare before focusing on me. “But I also firmly believe that talking is a better method of coping than just drowning yourself in wine.”

Now she reminded me of Shae. Too much, it was all too much, and the haze of the wine was barely dampening the pain tangled inside.

“That’s nice. But if we’re going to be friends, Vala, let me make one thing perfectly clear, I set my own limits. I, and only I, decide how I want to cope and quite frankly, you don’t know shit about what I’ve been through.”

“Why don’t you tell me?”

“Nope. Now I’m either going to down another pitcher here or head to the bar and down one there. What will it be, friend ?” I elongated the last word, drawing on it and all it implied.

She looked at me; I could see judgment laced with concern in her eyes. Screw her. I placed both hands on the table and began to stand, but she grabbed my wrist.

“Here.” She handed me a pitcher and I drank.