Fight Me Little Pearl

Chapter 4

Chapter Four

FRANCESCA

“ M ama, it’s good to hear from you,” I say into the phone, as I stare at the romantic glow cast by the ornate and beautiful street lamps below my window. Earlier, I got one of the chambermaids to come up and help me out of my bridal dress. Afterwards, I took a long hot shower and I’m now standing by the tall windows wearing the ivory and lace nightie Louisa insisted looked the best on me.

Valentino left about four hours ago, and he still isn’t back. I know he is not working, so he’s probably out there with another woman, just like Papa. He too thought nothing of parading his whores under Mama’s nose.

It further convinces me that I am right to hate him. He reminds me of my father in too many ways. Above all though, I hate myself more for my body’s insane reactions to him. It is quite clear to me now that my body will always succumb and betray me when it comes to him.

That last kiss haunts me and makes me curious about what more from him will feel like. I cannot even believe that these are the thoughts running through my mind but Thomas and everyone else and their mom is right. Valentino is an unbelievably attractive and dangerous man. I want him, I have to admit. Even if it’s just a brief taste. I’ll burn in hell however before admitting that to anyone, even myself.

“Where are you,” Mama asks. I know she is worried, but she is trying not to show it. “Are you alright?”

“I am fine, Mama. We’re in Paris.”

“Oh! You’re already on your honeymoon?”

“Yes. Apparently, Valentino is not a fan of red velvet cake or lemon icing.”

“Ah!” There is a short pause. “We should have consulted him.”

“He didn’t want to be consulted,” I reminded.

“I feel so silly interrupting you on your honeymoon. It’s barely been a day and you are a grown woman now, not a little girl anymore. You must pay attention to your husband. I’ll say goodbye. Call me when you have the time.”

“Hey, wait don’t go yet-”

But then I hear the sound of voices outside the bedroom and because there has been nothing but hushed whispers until now I immediately guess that Valentino is back and talking to his men. My heart starts to beat wildly at the thought of seeing him again. I would love to continue on with the conversation with my mother and ignore him or pretend that I don’t care what he does, but my mind has gone completely blank.

“That’s him now. Let me call you back, Mama.”

I end the call and sprint to the bed. Pulling aside the covers I put my phone underneath the pillow and quickly slip between the clean-smelling sheets. Shutting my eyes, I breathe as evenly as I can and pretend to be asleep. The room door opens and soft footsteps follow.

I hardly dare breathe. What is he doing in my room?

I hear the soft thud of clothes falling to the floor.

My heart goes crazy when the bed dips. Valentino is climbing into bed with me. I lay still, but my body is surging with heat at his nearness. Is he supposed to share the same bed with me? I mean, he is my husband and whatever, but we don’t have to do this. No one will know so why the fuck is he here? This is a suite and there is another room. In fact, that is the master bedroom.

The faint scent of perfume wafts over to me. I know how Valentino smells. Masculine. Addictive. Lethal. A hint of musk and citruses that lures me in against my will. But this scent is completely different. It’s soft, sultry, and seductive. A woman’s scent.

My heart stops. Literally stops.

The bastard!

My eyes fly open and I vault away from him and sit up. There’s an unbearable ache in my chest that I identify as pure disgust because I can’t bear for it to be anything else. I don’t care who Valentino fucks. If any woman wants my handsome, attractive-as-sin husband, she can have him. She is welcome to him.

But I don’t have to know and I most definitely don’t have to be breathing in the smell of another woman’s perfume in my own bed. It’s still a little dark in the room so I flip the bedside light on to find my slippers. I need to get out of here.

“Turn that fucking thing off,” he growls softly.

Like a lion. Calm yet lethal.

Nervously, I turn to see Valentino’s grey eyes on me, appearing cool on the surface, yet flashing with deadly ice shards.

“Do not swear at me!” I fight back even if my courage will only extend to words.

Finding the damn slippers and sliding them on, I deliberately leave the bedside light on and walk away from the bed. Valentino doesn’t respond, nor does he move from his position on his back. He is watching me expressionlessly. I’m a bit surprised I have to admit. I hate that I’m not getting a reaction out of him. How dare he lie there like nothing happened? How dare he just lie there when his body reeks of another woman’s perfume?

I reach the door, but I can’t just leave. I have to do more with my words. “And oh, by the way, my dear husband, I’ll be going out later today to find a lover. I hope you don’t wake up, but in case you do and don’t find me, that’s where I will be.” Then I turn around smartly to walk out the door.

“What did you just say to me?”

His voice is like a whiplash and stops me cold in my tracks. Goosebumps rise on my skin. I want to nonchalantly walk out, but I can’t. I just can’t. How can a string of seven words cause my feet to stay rooted in place? His picture should be next to the word “Authority” in the dictionary.

My big plan was to strut out after that stinging remark with my shoulders straight and my head held up high, but now, I’m almost sure if I take a single step, it will be my last. I can now only turn around to face him. Slowly, I do so. Fortunately, he isn't pointing a gun at my head. I find him sitting up on the bed, weaponless, but his eyes are relentlessly dangerous. Somehow, he looks even more devilishly lethal and attractive than ever sitting up in bed, shirtless. I force myself to remember that I am as furious with him as he is with me. He sure looks like he expects me to fall on my knees to beg for mercy. I’d rather burn in hell.

“You heard me.” I steel my spine. “If you think you’re the only one who can whore around, think again.”

“What the hell are you yakking about?”

“I married a genius! Do you think I’m stupid? I can smell another woman on you!”

It seems to take him a little while to comprehend what I am saying, but when he does, to my great surprise, his lips tilt upwards into a delighted smile. The first real one I’ve seen and it makes him look as rakish as a sea-loving pirate.

“Are you jealous?”

“Jealous?” I spit incredulously. The man was unbelievable. “You must be joking. To assume I am jealous would be to presume I expected some commitment from you to me. Or for that matter from me to you. But for the record, I should make it clear that I am not in the least bit surprised, nor did I expect you to act any better. I knew who you were before this sham of a marriage. You're just like my father, you?—”

“I am nothing like your father,” Valentino cuts me off, rising slowly. All the amusement is gone. His face is like thunder. There is a great distance between us, but as he unfurls to his full height, it suddenly feels like there’s not enough space in the room. “Your father was a coward, and he died at the mercy of his enemies like the shameless dog he was.”

I may not have liked my father, but I hate Valentino’s disrespect even more. “A shameless dog? How dare you speak ill of the dead? You think you’re different from him because you’re the great Don? Trust me, the similarities between you and him are inherent, look in the mirror and-”

Valentino moves fast. One second, he’s lying in bed all the way across the room, and in the next, he’s pressing me against the door, his fingers wrapped around my neck. Not tightly, but like bands of velvet… I can feel his rage on my skin.

Seconds pass or perhaps aeons. It feels like forever as I try to claw away his grip, but it’s like steel vices. Impossible to budge.

“The only reason you still have breath in your lungs is because of the ring I put on your finger,” he says softly, his eyes boring into mine. “But if you compare me to any of the Barbieri men, especially your useless father, one more time, I will bury you with your ring, so help me God.”

I must have been nine or ten years old when I started to hear the stories about the young stallion, Valentino Barone. I didn’t really understand what my family was all about, but I already understood the fear his name evoked in the hearts of men in my family. He was nicknamed Silent Night because of the strange silence in which he killed. He never spoke, he never gave any sound of warning. No threats, no curses, no taunts, no recriminations. The men he killed never suspected death was imminent until it was too late. Gossip has it that the things he’s done to secure power are things that cannot be said out loud.

But right now, as he stands before me, his eyes blazing fire and his fingers around my throat, there is no sign of the coldly controlled killer, and my body pulses with fear and desire. The ache for him is so strong I feel a wetness between my legs. This man is a criminal, even worse than my father so how can I stand here and enjoy his bloody hands on me? Out of shame for my wantonness, I push him away from me, but it is like pushing a brick wall.

“I am not one of the sissies you seem to enjoy running around with,” he drawls. “You must learn to watch how you speak to me. The umbrella of being my wife only covers so much.”

“Kill me then, and end this torment,” I dare him passionately, and at that moment I mean it too. “Being your wife is worse than death.”

A shadow crosses his eyes, but I don’t stop my verbal assault. I want to punish him for making me feel things I don’t want to feel.

“I will never love you, Valentino Barone. Or want you. My heart belongs to someone else and I will never come to care for you. How does that make you feel? Wait… are you even capable of feeling? I despise you so much I would rather save the life of a rodent in a sewer than yours. What does it feel like to know that the person who hates you the most is also who you gave your ring to? Is who you are also forced to protect, not because you want to, but just to save your reputation.”

He stares at me for a moment, then his eyes shutter and it becomes like impenetrable glass. “I’m not asking for your heart, Francesca.”

An ache spreads in my chest. It’s the first time he’s called me Francesca. He always calls me his little pearl. La mia perla . It used to aggrieve me because I knew he didn’t mean it. I knew it was a mockery, but somehow I want to keep hearing it. For some reason, I prefer it to Francesca. Everybody calls me Francesca.

“Yes, I will protect you with my life because that’s what it means to take a woman and give her my name. You and your family will have protection beyond your wildest dreams because you are my wife.”

“And in return, you have Terra de Barbiera.” I throw the words at him spitefully.

“Yes, in return I have Terra de Barbiera,” he agrees smoothly, but there’s a quiet fury in his eyes that tells me my words have annoyed him. Well, boo-hoo. “But my protection is worth far more than a piece of land that your family doesn’t even have the means to develop, is it not?”

I refuse to answer him.

His brow arches. “My protection ceases the day you humiliate me by sleeping with another man.” He holds my gaze sternly. “I am Don Barone. I do not share my money, I do not share my drugs, I do not share my goods, and I sure as hell do not share my fucking woman.”

My woman.

A thrill, hot and juicy, runs through me.

“The day I find you with another man, I swear to God, I will rip your family apart with my bare hands. But before it gets to that, you are welcome to leave right now, and I will not stop you.”

He steps back and gestures to the door. A humiliating flush rushes up my throat and stains my cheeks. Despite all my bravado and pride, I am at his mercy. The Barbieri family needs him more than he needs us. Terra de Barbiera may be the object of every Mafia family’s desire, but it’s worth nothing compared to the protection the name Barone offers.

“Are you walking away?” Valentino asks politely.

I swallow and shake my head.

“Words, bellezza . Words.”

I clear my throat, feeling the heat of shame spread all over my face. I hate that he can see my embarrassment even though there’s no gloating in his eyes.

“Not yet,” I reply. “Eventually.”

He gives me a stone-cold look, then he goes around to my side of the bed, switches off the lamp, gets into bed, closes his eyes and behaves as if I no longer exist.

I leave the room, unable to stand the sight of his arrogant face any longer.

One day down, God knows how many more to go. I’m not sure I can survive many more of this. His men must have left as the suite is empty. There is a breakfast cart parked by the dining table. As I sink onto the big comfy sofa, tears sting my eyes. When I was younger, I would imagine how my life could have been if I wasn’t born into a Mafia family.

If I were born into a normal family.

I probably would be a normal twenty-year-old with a normal boyfriend, someone like Thomas. Not married to a freaking mafia boss who kills humans the way other people kill cockroaches. Growing up and seeing the way my father treated my mother and me, I always wished for more, and I promised myself I would find a loving man who would dote on me, love me, and put me first.

How did I end up with someone even worse than my father?

After my father’s death, I was surprised when Nonno told me my father left the Terra de Barbiera to me. My father never gave me anything. In fact, he hated both me and Mama; me because I was a female child, and Mama because she had a condition that meant she couldn’t have any more children after me. He wanted a male heir, but surprisingly, with all the whores he kept, he continued to have female children who he would abandon in disgust as soon as they were born. I could have hundreds of half-sisters dotted all around the world for all I knew.

I suppose I should be grateful he didn’t abandon me at birth like all the others.

Terra de Barbiera was the only thing my family had that was of any value, and immediately after my father’s death, the powerful Mafia families began to hunt us for it.

Terra de Barbiera was a pocket of land located in the heart of a multi-billion-dollar development. Although it was mine, it was up to Nonno to decide how best the land could be used to enrich and protect our family. By now the deeds to the land must already have been transferred to Valentino and Terra de Barbiera is now his to do as he pleases.

I’d witnessed many men come to ask for my hand in marriage in exchange for Terra de Barbiera, and my heart soared every time Nonno rejected them. Until one day, Silent Night himself found his way to Nonno’s office.

It was the first time I’d laid eyes on Silent Night, and after all the gory tales I’d heard about him, I expected him to look like the devil, but it was the opposite. There’s a saying: The most beautiful things are often the most dangerous, and Valentino personifies that saying. He was so magnificent my heart couldn’t help but flutter. Even so, I knew that beauty should take a back seat to character. How right that perception was. The more I get to know him the uglier he becomes, starting from when he’d decided to marry a woman against her will, and to now with him going to a whore on our honeymoon… on our very first night together.

Okay, I’ll admit, I did reject him, but just for the sake of propriety couldn’t he, at least, have controlled his animal urges for one freaking night?

I made a pact with myself to never get involved with a man like my father, and here I am. Lusting for an unworthy man. But worse I now know that my body will betray me and I must find the will to stand my ground against my husband before I lose every single iota of good left inside me.

I must keep my body pure and remain faithful to my love for Thomas.