Fight Me Little Pearl

Chapter 49

Chapter Forty-Nine

FRANCESCA

B right intrusive light filters in through my lashes as I struggle to open my eyes. My eyelids feel heavy like there are stones on them. I want to open my mouth to cry out against the pain coursing through my body, but it feels like my mouth is full of sand and cotton. I’m trapped in a strange body and I don’t know how to get out.

“She’s blinking,” a familiar voice says beside me. I struggle for a moment before realizing it is Louisa.

“Call the Doctor!”

That’s Mama.

“Call the Doctor, quick, Louisa. I think she’s trying to open her eyes.”

At the sound of Mama’s voice, I fight the pain weighing me down, and after a few attempts, I manage to peel my eyes open. My gaze focuses on Mama. She is standing beside my bed and her eyes are red and swollen from crying.

“Don’t cry, Mama.”

“Oh, Francesca.” She clasps my hand between hers. “I was so afraid. My baby. My darling. Oh, thank God.”

Louisa and the doctor hurry into the room, and upon seeing me awake, Louisa gasps. “You’re awake. Thank God.”

“Louisa.” Her expression is so funny I want to laugh, but my face is tight like there’s a layer of cement on it.

The Doctor steps up beside me. “How do you feel?”

“A splitting headache,” I groan. “And my eyes are heavy. Can I have some water?”

“Here.” Mama holds a glass to my mouth, and I drink greedily, enjoying the relief I feel as the water washes down my throat. When the glass is empty, I take a deep breath.

“That water was good. Already, I feel better.”

“That’s good.” He nods. “I’ll arrange a meal for you. Then you take your medications and have a good rest.”

“Thank you. When can I go home?”

My mother scowls at me. “You won’t be going anywhere. You’ll stay here until the Doctor says it’s time for you to go. I don’t care if it’s one year.”

The Doctor smiles uncertainly and quickly exits the room.

I look around the spacious suite, but I don’t see Valentino anywhere. The door opens and I glance at it excitedly, but my heart falls when I see my Nonno walk in.

He smiles dully at me. “You look disappointed, cara mio . You thought it was your husband?” He walks towards my bed slowly.

I narrow my eyes. I may feel hazy and slow, but I can still tell that there was some tension in the way he said, ‘your husband’. Also, I didn’t miss the quick stare my mom sent his way. Then there’s Louisa, who suddenly finds the patterns on the bed sheets super interesting.

“How do you feel?” Nonno asks.

“I feel fine. Thank you. Where’s Valentino?”

Has something happened to him?

“Mama?” I turn worriedly to my mother. “Where’s my husband?”

“Your husband?” Nonno scoffs. “I think you should concentrate on resting, Francesca. You will need it.”

A slow ache grows in my chest, and it’s different and more intense than the physical ache in my body.

I shake my head restlessly. Something is terribly wrong. I can feel it. “Where’s Valentino, Mama?”

“Well, since you want to know the truth,” Nonno says. “Your husband has?—”

“Nono!” My mother scolds, scowling at him. “She’s just opened her eyes. Don’t do this.”

“Mama!” I sit up, and ignoring the sharp pain in my back, I start to yank off the tubes connected to my arms.

My mother cries out and grabs my hands in hers. I frown at her. “Tell me right now! What’s wrong with Valentino? Is he okay?”

“Francesca…” my mama hesitates.

“He requested a divorce from you, okay,” Louisa shouts suddenly as if she can’t bear to keep the secret anymore.

“What?” The blood drains out of my face, and I fall against the pillows, weak and deflated. “Why?” I turn my head and look at Louisa. “Why? What did I do wrong?”

“What didn’t you do?” Nonno accuses harshly, and I flinch. “This is all your fault.”

“Please!” My mama shouts, but he shuts her up with a glare.

“Shut up, woman. Tell your daughter the truth. You raised a slut. There’s only so much a man can take. Valentino cared for you more than any man should, but you let him down in the worst way possible. No man will ever forgive that.”

“What are you talking about?” My head feels heavy with all the shouting and confusion. I feel like screaming into a void.

“You were on your way to meet with that little rat I warned you about when you got into this accident weren’t you, Francesca?”

My heart slams into my chest. “No!”

“No?” He frowns blackly. “Don’t lie. You were. You put yourself in harm’s way because of a boy who has no value to your life. Not only did you get yourself in an accident, you lost your baby!”

My mouth opens, but no sound will come out. I stare at him in a mixture of disbelief and stupefied horror. What is he talking about? How can what he is saying be true? My brains are so scrambled with the painkillers that it has not even crossed my mind that I have survived and my baby has not. I assumed the knocks I sustained were superficial and the little life growing deep inside me would be fine. I turn to my mother.

“Mama,” I whisper.

My mother starts crying.

Guilt, terrible guilt fills my whole body. Why did I decide to go see Thomas? If I had not… my baby would be alive.

As Nonno walks out of the room, Mama and Louisa hug me. I continue to sob, my body shaking with hurt and shock. To be honest, I don’t really believe Nonno. It must be a mistake. My baby is still inside me. Protected and growing.

“I want to talk to Valentino now,” I cry. “Please call him.”

Mama shakes her head. “I’m so sorry darling, but he has forbidden us from calling or reaching out to him.”

I’ve never felt pain like what I feel now. It’s like there’s a giant fist in my chest squeezing hard.

“Mama, I don’t love Thomas. I was going to end things with him. I-”

“Shhh.” My mama smooths back my hair. “Louisa explained everything to me. I believe you.”

I touch my belly and my sobs intensify. It’s empty. There’s nothing there anymore. No baby. Valentino’s little bean is gone. My life is empty.

“Don’t cry anymore, my darling,” Mama comforts me. “As soon as you’re healthy enough, you can go and try to reason with him.”

She pulls away. “Let me see why your meal is taking too long.”

I don’t care about the meal. All I want is to see Valentino. He’s all I care about.

Louisa kisses my hair. “I know you love him, but you have to be patient. Give him time. He’ll come around.”

“Is he very upset?” I croak.

“I wasn’t there,” Louisa mumbles, tightening her arm around me. “But Nonno said he was.” She lowers her voice. “He said you broke Valentino’s heart.”

Her words make me sob again.

“I’m just going to keep my mouth shut from now on,” she says.

I completely understand how Valentino feels because I suffered terribly when I thought he was with Nina or that lap dancer. I want to make it better. I know I can. I just have to get out of this hospital and face him again.

In the back of my mind, a little voice is scolding me for being so careless.

You promised you would never hurt him with Thomas again, and yet, days later you get into an accident on your way to see Thomas.

I know how it must look, but all I can do is hope he trusts me enough to believe me when I tell him the truth.

I’m forced to stay in that hospital for one week before I’m allowed to leave. During this time, neither Nonno nor Valentino come to visit. I’m not really worried about my grandfather, but as I travel back to my marital home, I’m suddenly anxious about meeting Valentino.

My mother said he wanted me to get my things and move out, but I don’t intend to move out. I will grovel if that’s what it takes for him to take me back. I have already lost a child and I will not lose him too, not for anything in the world, and certainly not because of Thomas. All I want is his trust and forgiveness.

Half an hour later, I walk towards the front door, my heart thudding wildly in my chest. For the first time, I’m scared to confront Valentino, and that bothers me. Thankfully, the door is unlocked, so I walk in without knocking. I start walking towards the steps, but I hear a sound behind me and whirl around to see Valentino sitting at the dining table, his eyes on me.

“Hello, Francesca.” He smiles coldly. “How are you? You look good.”

I panic because whenever he’s calm and detached, it’s harder to reach him. I prefer an angry, raging Valentino over this cool and detached one.

“Valentino.” I start to walk towards him.

“Stop.”

I instantly halt at the ice in his voice.

“I asked you a question. How are you?”

“I’m fine. You didn’t come to see me.”

“There was no need,” he says. “I was hoping we could make a clean break.”

“Break from what?” My body feels numb.

“Vance has already taken your things back to your house. You probably missed him on the way here.”

“My things are not here?”

“Nope.”

“Valentino…”

“Come on, Francesca.” He rises to his feet and walks slowly towards me. “Let’s not pretend that this isn’t what you want. I’m giving you what you always wanted. The opportunity to go out there and be free. All those who wanted you dead are gone. You can be anything you want to be or be with anyone you want to be with, and you’ll still have my protection. How amazing a deal is that?”

Tears slip down my face, but Valentino turns away from me.

“I don’t want to be anything without you, Valentino. Please.”

“That’s not true,” he says, his back to me. “I’m done, Francesca. I’m letting you go.”

“Please.” I walk towards him and touch his arm. He tenses before jerking away like he’s afraid I would contaminate him. It hurts even more than his rejection.

“Valentino,” I whisper.

“We lost our baby!” His voice breaks. “We lost our baby, and I know it’s not your fault, but I can’t help but blame you. The lane to Westside is a lonely one; they never would have been able to get you if you went straight to your mother’s house. You chose to go and see him after you promised to never hurt me with him anymore.”

“Valentino, I-”

“You think my heart is made of stone? It’s made of blood and cells like yours. I was heartbroken when I heard you went to see Thomas. I felt worse than death. You could have stabbed me in the chest, and I would have forgiven you, Francesca, but your betrayal…I cannot forgive that. Never. You’ve made him into an important figure between us and I can no longer look past him. It’s over. I feel nothing for you anymore. You killed everything. Everything.”

“I don’t want him, Valentino,” I say in a rush. “I swear I was only going to tell him to stay away from me.” The truth suddenly sounds stupid to my ears, and with how Valentino is staring at me, he feels the same way.

“You couldn’t tell him this over the phone?” he asks mockingly. “You couldn’t talk to me about it first and ask me what I think about that? You had to go see him behind my back to tell him to stay away from you? Do you hear how the fuck you sound?”

When I flinch, Valentino sighs. “Just go away, Francesca. It’s over this time.”

“I can’t. This is my home.”

“Then I’ll go away,” he says, drifting towards the stairs.

“It’s about the baby, isn’t it?” I call as he leaves. “You’re punishing me for losing the baby.”

“Yes.” He throws his arms in the air. “Does that make me a cruel bastard? Fine, I’ll take it. You already said I was worse than your father, so heap all the abuse you want to. What other accusations do you have for me, Francesca?”

“The land,” I throw at him. “Oh, I see. It’s all starting to make sense. You won’t forgive me because you don’t need me anymore. You’ve acquired what you wanted the most from our partnership. The Terra de Barbieri. It’s now yours. You don’t need me anymore.”

Valentino shakes his head either in disgust or defeat and continues up the stairs.

“Shut the door on your way out, woman.”