Filthy Rich Santas

1. Lana

1

LANA

My heart races as I look around the club. Radiance is everything I expected an upscale sex club to be, and yet somehow, it’s still more than I imagined.

The decor is sleek and modern, but with a touch of sensuality and, in honor of the season, some tasteful holiday decor. Low music plays from hidden speakers, and there are couches and comfortable-looking chairs throughout the space, all dark red and brown leather. Some of them are so big and wide, they’re more like beds, a few sitting empty but most with people in various states of dress and undress lounging on them.

“And this is the tame part of the club,” I whisper to myself, a hot flush moving through me as I think of the introductory packet I was given after completing the lengthy vetting process.

There are other rooms here. Rooms with BDSM equipment, sex toys, and all sorts of sexy possibilities that have my stomach filling with jitterbugs. The thought of exploring further has me so nervous that my hands are sweating… but those nerves feel a lot like the thrill of excitement too.

“Two sides of the same coin,” I whisper to myself, knowing that no matter what happens tonight, I’m proud of myself for making it this far.

I’m ready to explore some new sides of myself, and if not now, when? And if I deliberately picked this club to start doing some of that exploration at, well, I won’t get my hopes up. But that doesn’t mean I can’t stay open to possibilities, right?

I head toward the bar, telling myself firmly that I’m not keeping an eye out for the three men who own the place—my older brother’s best friends. After all, it’s one thing to stay open to possibilities, but it’s something else entirely to wish for impossible things.

I still need something to calm my nerves, though. And even though I know they don’t serve anything alcoholic here, having a glass of seltzer water in my hands will give me a little more of a sense of belonging. If nothing else, it should help me stop fiddling with the yellow wristband I chose when I arrived.

Which I’m doing again.

I force myself to drop my hand, biting my lip as I second guess whether I should have taken red instead. Yellow tells the other guests that I’m open to meeting them, but not ready to be outright propositioned. Red would have been a hard no on being asked to… do anything.

And green—well, no matter how interested I am in exploring the interests I’ve only recently admitted to myself that I have, I’m definitely not ready for green. In fact, the club rules about the wristband system are clear. They don’t even allow it for a first-timer like me, since I’m here on my own and not even a full member.

Which doesn’t mean I can’t still play if I find someone interested.

And, of course, find the courage to do it.

“First time here?” a deep, baritone voice asks from my left after I’ve placed my order for a seltzer water.

My heart jumps into my throat as I turn to him, then look up. He’s a little taller than my 5’6”, even with the extra few inches my heels give me tonight.

Not as tall as Beckett, Tristan, or Ryder, though.

Which, I remind myself firmly, isn’t relevant. I’m not here for them. And even if I was, it’s not like I really expect any one of them to suddenly decide I’m more than just my brother’s baby sister, just because I’m here.

The man who approaches me smiles, and the way he’s leaning against the varnished oak bar, letting his gaze lazily roam over me in a way that’s flattering but not sleazy, has a giddy, nervous laugh bubbling in my throat. Not just because he’s attractive, although he is, but because even if my hidden desires about what might come of showing up here aren’t likely to come true, I’m still following through with my commitment to start exploring who I really want to be.

I’m really here, and I’ve actually captured someone’s attention.

“Yes,” I admit to the guy, knowing my pale skin is probably showing my feelings the way it always does as I feel a blush heat my cheeks. “It’s my first time.”

My pulse starts to race as he starts to make small talk, his gaze pausing for a moment on my yellow wristband before respectfully coming back up to my eyes.

“I take it it’s not your first time, though?” I say, daring to be flirtatious even though it has my stomach feeling jittery again.

His eyes dart down to my wristband again. “That’s right,” he says as the bartender returns and slides my seltzer water over to me.

I pick it up gratefully, taking a long sip, and remind myself that I’m here to explore things. To be bold. To finally learn what it is to be the person I want to be.

And even if I don’t end up doing any of that with this particular man, his obvious interest definitely helps drown out the ugly voices in my head that I had to overcome just to walk through Radiance’s doors tonight. The voices that sound an awful lot like my parents’, and constantly remind me of all the ways I don’t live up to conventional beauty standards.

All the freckles.

My generous curves.

The million and one imperfections that have been pointed out to me all of my life… and of course the new one that, thankfully, isn’t outwardly visible.

My admirer shifts a little closer, his thigh brushing against mine. “If you’re interested in being shown around the club,” he offers, carefully skirting the no propositioning rule my yellow wristband holds him to, “I’d be more than happy to introduce you to some of my favorite activities here.”

I have no idea if he’s actually someone I want to explore the world of kink with, but as anxious as I am about trying something so different and new, I feel safe here at Radiance. My brother’s friends have created the perfect environment within the four walls of the club, and it makes me feel empowered to see where things might go if I really let myself explore my interests here.

“Tell me more,” I murmur, sipping my drink again to combat the flush in my cheeks.

He brushes a long strand of hair off my cheek, tucking it behind my ear, then lets his hand linger as he leans in to murmur softly in my ear. “I could, but showing is often so much more rewarding than telling.”

My nerves fire up again. Before I can convince myself that it’s really just another taste of excitement, a hand falls on my admirer’s shoulder. A big one, with thick, blunt fingers and all-too-familiar tattoos on the knuckles.

My breath hitches.

It’s Beckett Stone. One of my brother’s best friends. One of the reasons I came here tonight.

Beckett yanks the guy off me, and a flash of irritation crosses the man’s face, his lip pulling back in a snarl for a split second before he sees who it is looming over him. Then he blanches a little, his expression smoothing out into something more respectful.

I can’t really blame him. I have no idea if the man knows that Beckett is one of Radiance’s owners, but even without taking that into consideration, Beckett is huge. His muscular 6’5” build is intimidating enough on its own, but combined with the scowl under his dark, messy hair and the fire in his dark green eyes as he glares down at the guy, anyone would think twice about getting into it with him.

“This one’s off limits,” he says gruffly, his eyes flickering to me for a second before zeroing back in on my admirer.

Well, former admirer. The man obviously wasn’t that invested in getting to know me since he mumbles a quick apology in my direction, then scoots around Beckett’s tattooed bulk to disappear back into the depths of the club.

Beckett turns to watch him go, standing like a brick wall between me and everything I came here to experience.

I really, really want to be irritated about that. But who am I kidding? Having Beckett not just notice that I’m here, but actually take an interest in what I’m doing is like the start of the dream I keep trying to convince myself there’s no use in having.

Although I guess choosing the club he owns with my other two fantasy men, Ryder and Tristan, is all the evidence I need that I’m not doing a great job of pretending I don’t want what I want.

Beckett growls something under his breath at the man scurrying away from us, and the waves of dominance rolling off him have heat pooling between my legs.

Thankfully, his back is still turned to me. Although I secretly hoped I’d run into my brother’s friends tonight, now that one of them is right here, I’m not sure I’m actually ready for him to notice the effect he has on me.

Not after so many years of hiding it.

For most of my life, my older brother, Caleb, was practically joined at the hip with Beckett and his two other best friends, Ryder and Tristan. I’m friendly with all of them too, but I’m also very firmly in the “Caleb’s little sister” category for each one of them. It’s why all three of them make a point of checking up on me now that I’m living out here in Los Angeles where they all settled.

Somehow, I run into one of them every few weeks. It happens often enough to make me wonder if Caleb asked them to keep tabs on me, because Los Angeles is so huge that it can’t be an accident.

I’ve never called them on it, though, because it’s nice. Still, running into one of my brother’s best friends while I’m getting groceries or grabbing a coffee is one thing. Having to face Beckett and all his lickable tattoos while I’m wearing fuck-me heels and a yellow “yes, I might be interested” wristband at a kinky sex club is another thing altogether.

But there’s no getting out of facing him eventually. As soon as my former admirer is out of the picture, Beckett grunts something at me with another scowl. Wrapping one of his strong hands around my arm, he drags me away from the sweating glass of seltzer water I set on the bar.

“Come with me,” he rumbles, pulling me into a dimly lit hallway behind the bar that I hadn’t noticed before. Probably because the entrance is neatly camouflaged to blend into the decor.

I drag my feet, biting my lip as I look around. “Are we even allowed back here?”

It’s a stupid question and I know it. Obviously, Beckett can go wherever he wants. It’s his club. He, Ryder, and Tristan aren’t just co-owners. From everything I’ve heard, they’re actively involved in every aspect of running it.

Beckett doesn’t even bother to answer. He just drops my arm and crowds me back against the wall, caging me in with both hands flattened to it on either side of my head.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” he demands.

My pulse starts to race again, but unlike with my former admirer at the bar, this time, there’s no question about whether it’s due to the man in front of me or not.

I may still be uncertain about where exactly my recently acknowledged interest in kink will take me, but the way my body reacts to Beckett’s natural dominance leaves no doubt that I want to pursue more of it.

I lift my chin, reminding myself that I’ve known Beckett for half my life. I may be attracted to him, but I’ve never been intimidated and don’t plan on starting now.

“Why does anyone come here?” I huff. “You do own this place, right? Which means you know what people come here to do?”

The pained look that crosses his face might have made me laugh if I wasn’t strung so taut on nerves, excitement, and my body’s reaction to his nearness. “And you know that Caleb would kill all three of us if he found out you were here.”

I smile a little when he says “all three of us.” I can’t help it. And maybe that’s the reason I can’t settle on just one of these men to crush on. Through thick and thin, they’ve always been a unit. My brother too, of course, but now that he has to travel so much for his career in the NHL, I know that a certain amount of distance has grown between him and the other three men.

Beckett isn’t wrong, though. Caleb would definitely have feelings if he found out I’d come to a kinky sex club tonight. Even one, or maybe especially one, where his friends were there to look out for me.

But I’m a twenty-six-year-old woman, single and free, and finally living far enough from my family to start exploring things that I know they’d disapprove of. If I was going to let my brother’s feelings stop me from starting to live the life I really want, I never would have walked through Radiance’s doors.

“This isn’t any of Caleb’s business,” I tell Beckett, poking his rock-hard chest for emphasis.

He gives me a flat stare, ignoring my finger. “You’re his sister.”

“And a grown-ass woman! I can do what I want.”

“Lana…” Beckett growls.

“Beckett,” I say back, trying for sassy but ending up sounding hopelessly breathless instead.

Not my fault. Sassy isn’t really who I am, and besides, he’s standing too close. I can feel his body heat. Smell the cedar and leather scent that’s uniquely his. And all that rumbling displeasure of his literally makes the air between us vibrate.

“I was having a perfectly nice conversation with the man at the bar,” I start.

“No,” Beckett cuts me off.

I blink up at him. “What?”

“I said no.”

I give a disbelieving laugh, shaking my head. “Just… no?”

All three of my brother’s best friends have always been incredibly protective of me, but even if they’ll never see me the way I want them to, I still have every right to be here. Every right to explore my interest and try to discover if kink is right for me.

“You heard me,” Beckett says, something dark and a little dangerous flaring in his eyes.

The sight of it makes my breath hitch, touching on the hidden part of me I’m yearning to explore here. So of course I attempt to poke him again, or maybe push him away from me.

Too bad for me I accidentally end up stroking the heated planes of his solid chest instead.

Again, not my fault, though. He’s wearing a tight black shirt that’s molded to his muscles and feels sinfully soft. Possibly silk? Whatever it is, it fits him like a second skin and feels like pure pleasure.

He captures my hand, holding it against his chest. He frowns down at me, his eyes narrowing. “You shouldn’t be here, little menace. Where’s your boyfriend?”

I snatch my hand back, his use of that stupid childhood nickname reminding me of where I’ll always stand with my brother’s friends.

Even when it’s bubbling just under the surface, I can’t quite admit to myself what I was really hoping for by coming to the club that they own. But Beckett’s reaction to finding me here makes it clear.

I will always be Caleb’s little sister to this man. I know it’s the same with Tristan and Ryder too.

And if that isn’t enough to kill my hopes, along with my libido, the fact that Beckett brought up my ex definitely is.

I guess he hasn’t heard.

“Wade broke up with me—a month after proposing to me, actually. Apparently, ‘chubby girls aren’t wife material,’” I mumble, certain that my skin is broadcasting my emotions again as I feel my face flush with embarrassment.

Not that I miss my ex-fiancé. I don’t. But it would be nice, just once, to be… enough for someone.

Or just enough, period.

“Shit,” Beckett mutters, his hard demeanor instantly softening.

That just makes it worse.

I swallow and look away, my stomach dropping, but of course Beckett can’t just leave it at that.

He tips my face back up, staring intently into my eyes. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” I whisper, getting a little lost in the intensity of his gaze before I catch myself and remember why I came. I shake it off and make myself grin up at him, tilting my head to the side. “Why do you think I came to a place like this? I’m free and single now! And I want to get back out there and have some fun.”

Beckett’s expression hardens so fast it’s like someone dropped a steel shutter in front of his face, and suddenly the little bit of space that had opened up between us is gone .

“I’m sorry that piece of shit dumped you, but trust me, none of the men here are good enough for you,” he growls.

There’s something hard and almost possessive in his words, and, for just a second, the words you are flicker through my mind, making my heart skip a beat.

We stare at each other without blinking, so close I can feel his breath on my lips.

I can barely catch my breath, my body reacting to him in ways that are completely out of my control. He’s so close, I feel like I’m wrapped in sex pheromones, his cedar and leather scent almost overwhelming me. He’s an inked up muscle-bound god that any woman would get wet for, but it’s more than that. It’s his sheer presence, dominating not because it’s a kink, but because that’s who he is .

“You’re right,” I breathe out without meaning to. The guy hitting on me at the bar wasn’t good enough, none of them are, because this is what I came looking for.

I want Beckett to crush me against the wall and kiss me.

I want him to see me for who I truly am. As more than Caleb’s little sister. As more than I’ve ever let myself be.

I want him to see, and then take .

But of course he doesn’t. He just blinks, shuttering the burning intensity I thought I saw in his eyes for a moment, then backs away from me, finally putting a little space between us.

Then, with another panty-melting glower, like he’s trying to torture me with what I can’t have, he crosses his massive arms over his chest and stares down at me. “Of course I’m right.”

I sigh, feeling an unsettling mix of foolish and grateful. I love the way he’s so protective of me. I don’t even really mind how overbearing he, Ryder, and Tristan can occasionally be, since it’s not like they normally interfere in my life, tonight notwithstanding.

But wishing for Beckett to notice me as a woman? To kiss me?

I need to face facts. It’s never going to happen.

None of my brother’s best friends have ever seen me as anything but Caleb’s nerdy, chubby little sister. The four-inch heels I’m wearing tonight and the leather halter top that made me feel so sexy and daring when I chose it aren’t going to change that. Nothing will.

Beckett suddenly cups my cheek, the rough, callused feel of his fingers on my skin making goosebumps break out. “Are you sure you’re okay, little menace? If you really want a tour of the club…”

His frown deepens, and I swear I can see the battle happening in his head as his voice fades away. It’s a war between the thought of getting stuck hovering and growling around me all night like some kind of guard dog, just to let me have my fun, and the idea of having to explain all this to Caleb at some point.

I lean into his palm, letting myself enjoy this one single thing before I call it a night.

Then I straighten up and nod, smoothing my hands over the flowing pants I actually felt kind of sexy in when I left the house earlier, overly abundant curves or not.

“No, it’s fine,” I tell him. “I should go anyway. I have to work tomorrow.”

It’s clear that I’ll just have to work out some other way to explore my interest in kink. One that doesn’t include pining over men I’ll never have.

“Are you parked in our lot?” he asks, his relentless protectiveness making me grin.

His eyes drop down to me—not my lips. Of course not. He’s probably looking at the annoying little dimple in my cheek that just emphasizes how very not thin and svelte I am.

I pat his chest, only letting my fingers linger on that sinful black silk for a moment.

Then I make myself pull my hand off him again, automatically reaching for my phone before remembering that I had to check it before entering. Club rules.

“I took a cab. I’ll just call another one as soon as I retrieve my phone and my coat.”

“No,” he says, wrapping his hand around my arm again and pulling me along like he did before.

“Bossy, much?” I mutter under my breath.

Beckett slants a heated look at me. “Yes. I’m calling you a car.”

I duck my head, hiding my smile. Even if I’ll never have the men I’ve always wanted, at least I know that I wasn’t wrong about one thing. Dominance with a side of possessive overprotectiveness really does do it for me.

Still, I’m not a damsel in distress.

“You don’t have to do that.”

His grip tightens on my arm, and for a second, I see that flash of something in his eyes again. “Yeah, little menace, I do. I need to know you’re safe.”

I nod and let him do it, not arguing when he waits with me so he can vet the driver, then ushers me into the back seat and tells him where to take me with another one of those menacing glares to let the guy know I’d better arrive in good condition.

I even smile at him when he pats the top of the car to send me on my way, giving him a jaunty little wave that hides the dejection creeping over me as the town car pulls away from the curb.

Of course Beckett wants me to be safe. It’s in his nature. It might even be some kind of bro-code promise he made to my brother.

But in the three months since Wade broke up with me, I’ve slowly been figuring out who I really am. Or at least, who I think I want to be. And playing it safe isn’t really a part of that picture.

I want to paint my life with bold colors now.

I want to not just make peace with all my imperfections, but find a way to celebrate them.

I want heat and passion and something wild, like the fantasies I had about tonight would play out.

I sigh, using my finger to draw a row of interlocking hearts in the condensation on the town car’s tinted window before leaning my face against the cool glass to watch the city pass by. This was my last chance to really feel like me before heading back east to spend Christmas with my family. At least, the version of me that I want to become. And it’s only now, driving away from Radiance with nothing to show for my night except my dreams going up in smoke, that I can admit the truth to myself.

My fantasies about tonight did include the three men who own the club. But my fantasies were just that. Fantasies.

The reality is that even though it was only Beckett I ran into tonight, I know that all three of them see me the same way. As someone to protect, care for, maybe even coddle. But never as someone to love. Not the way I want them to.

And never as someone to do all the wonderfully filthy things that those fantasies of mine are made of.