First Surrender (Chance Encounters #3)

Chapter Seventeen

Natalie

I don’t know why his interpretation of our sexual encounter has made me so upset, but I can’t stop scream-crying into the interior of my car as I drive. Not actual tears, but full-blown crying out to the universe with my frustration.

He is just another man who has intruded into my life and tried to best me somehow. Every male of the human species feels like they have an automatic advantage over women as if our little female brains can’t pick up on their gaslighting and manipulation tactics. Jackson is no different.

Instead of admitting that he partook in a consensual one-time fling, he twisted it in his mind that he coerced me. As if he is capable.

I am a grown woman and I know what coercion looks like. I’ve lived it. I don’t need him to dumb it down for me. He made me a victim and I am no one’s victim.

This is exactly why I am paying back the money for the hotel. I will never let anyone think they have something to hold against me. As if they have power over me.

Maybe I’m being irrational but I don’t care. Jackson Malec is never going to touch me again. He and his high and mighty horse.

Two more weeks living in the hotel and I am no closer to finding a new place to live. A few apartments I’ve looked into require more money for a deposit than I have in my bank account and the first month’s rent upfront.

How do single mothers survive like this?

I’ve only been doing it a year and feel like I’m buried neck-deep in quicksand. I can’t get a second job because I need to take care of Dec after school and on weekends. I can’t afford childcare. I don’t have a village to supplement the childcare. It’s impossible.

Brax has been scheduling me every day during the week at the coffee shack, but by the time I ration my tips to put toward my hotel fund, I hardly have anything left. Dec and I have been eating a lot of doctored-up ramen cooked off the hotplate at the hotel because I refuse to go on any more bad dinner dates.

He hasn’t complained because he gets different stuff at school, and a few times he’s had dinner at his friend’s house. I on the other hand have been living off of off-brand granola bars and peanut butter crackers during the day.

Sometimes I’ll snag the day-old muffins from the coffee shack before they’re thrown away and that’s a nice little treat. The real prize is when someone’s order is wrong and we take back their drink to give them a new one. No matter what kind of concoction it is, the caffeine is welcome.

Today has been one of those days that I need the boost to get through my shift. It’s not even noon and I’ve been asked on two dates, hardly filled my tip jar at all, and spilled a hot cup of coffee down my legs.

“Woah, easy tiger.” Brax laughs as I slam the dirty paper towels into the trash can.

“This day has been the worst,” I utter.

“Well, it’s lookin’ up. Look who is pulling in.” I glance at the monitor that shows us the cars as they approach and groan. No fucking way.

“Why is he here,” I grumble to myself.

“The man is hot, hot.” She raises her eyebrows suggestively and I ignore her. She has no idea that I know him so… Intimately.

“Good morning, Sheriff,” she sing-songs through the window, leaning suggestively over the ledge and pushing her tits obnoxiously high. She wears nothing more than a few scraps of fabric to work, and it works for her. She’s tall, hot, and has bleach-blonde extensions that get her plenty of compliments.

Her tip jar is almost always full.

My less-than-shining personality, dark hair, and pear-shaped body do not receive the same love. It’s fine, I don’t wish to garner male attention anyway, but I want the money. So some days I lay on my customer service thick. This is not a customer I will be doing that for.

Jackson is almost rudely staring out of his front window, not looking at Brax in the slightest, almost making me laugh. He’s so uncomfortable that it’s comical.

“I’m looking for Natalie.”

“Natalie? She have a warrant or something?”

I roll my eyes from behind her.

“It’s okay, Brax. He probably just wants to talk to me about my brother’s dad.”

She nods in understanding. I’ve told her tidbits about the case but not all the details of my life. We’re not necessarily friends.

“Okay, I’ll go take my break.” She winks at Jackson as she leaves our little shed, but his eyes are focused on me now. They trace my body with intense accuracy and I wish that he didn’t know what my vagina looks like. Ugh.

“What do you want?”

“What? You can show up to my house uninvited but I can’t show up to your job?” He asks, finally tearing his eyes off my low-cut black halter top. I don’t know why he’s looking, there is a lot less to see than on Brax.

“How did you even know that I was here?”

“I put a BOLO out on your car,” he states seriously.

“You did what?!” I screech.

“I’m kidding. The envelope you gave me came from here and I took a lucky guess that you would be working.” He looks at me like I’m dense.

“You’re such an asshole.”

“It’s an interesting uniform.”

“Shut up, I don’t need your opinion. Either order or leave.”

“Coffee, black.” Of course, he has the most boring drink order. Instead of doing what he asked, I pull out the caramel drizzle and steam some milk.

When I glance back at him to see if he’s noticed that I’m making his order wrong, his stare is glued to my ass. Men are too simple to be allowed to function in society.

I shift my apron around my waist, twisting it so the pockets hang down the back and cover my cheeky velvet shorts. His eyes snap to mine and I smirk.

“I should call in and complain,” I threaten lightly. I never would, not after jumping him in his office, but I might be tempted if he pissed me off anymore.

“Complain to who?”

“I don’t know. The Mayor. Judge Reisner.”

“They don’t care if I’m looking at your ass. They probably would too.”

I gape at him, searching his eyes for the joke. He’s absurdly serious.

“Maybe I’ll tell Roberta then. Your nice little secretary would probably scold you.” His jaw clenches because he knows I’m right. “Here.”

He grabs the hot drink from me and sniffs it. “What is this?”

“Caramel macchiato. $6.00”

His eyes bulge. “For a cup of coffee? It’s not even the one that I asked for.” I only shrug.

“This is ridiculous. I knew I’d regret coming here.” He digs out his wallet anyway, shoving his card into the machine that I’m offering out the window to him.

“Why did you come here? Just to get a glimpse at the butt you’ll never get to touch again?”

He scoffs but otherwise ignores me, getting to the tip screen on the card machine.

“Both guys who asked me out today left me the biggest tips, just so you know. In case you’re worried about me comparing tips.”

“What is wrong with you?” He looks at me incredulously and it makes me laugh with triumph. It’s not always easy to rile him up, but I do notice that he hit 20%.

“I came here because there has been an update in Declan’s case and the prosecutor wants to meet with us. I told him I would let you know and that neither of us would miss the appointment. This time.”

I ignore his remark about missing the appointment because my mind is already coming up with all of the reasons there might be an update. “Is it good or bad?” My heart is suddenly beating out of my chest.

“I don’t know. Either way, we’ll figure it out.”

Six hours later, we’re seated across from each other at a long wooden table in the prosecutor’s office. Neither of us speaks, staring at each other blankly.

“Do you guys need time to process this or..?” Prosecutor Fulton asks from the head of the table.

He just got done telling us that the Lawson PD Detective who was the lead investigator on Declan’s arrest, had just been arrested himself for planting evidence on a different case two years ago. All of his cases are being looked at.

“Declan’s case will be dismissed then?” Jackson asks, never taking his eyes off of me. It’s as if he’s waiting for me to explode. He’s assessing my internal temperature increase by the second.

“There is a strong possibility. Yes. Nothing is set in stone as of now, but we’ll meet with the judge next week. You should be prepared for that scenario,” he directs to me, but I ignore him.

Declan is going to get out. He’s getting away with murdering my mother. Dec’s mom. He is going to be released because some mother fucker screwed up. This can’t be happening.

I push up from my seat and nearly trip over my feet exiting the room, throwing the door wide with a crash. “Nat!” Jackson calls after me but I keep walking.

When his footsteps get heavier, catching up to me, I break into a run. I can’t do this.

I smash the elevator buttons, desperately. Please, open. Please.

As soon as the door slides open a crack I jump in, hitting the close door button, but it’s no use. Jackson stops the doors from closing with a meaty palm and steps inside with me.

“Go away.”

“No.”

“Why? Go discuss this with the prosecutor. You know, one of your fellow bigwigs that hold all the power and whatnot. I’m just one of the ants you people get to stomp all over.”

“I told you we’d figure it out.”

“There is no we! I am going to take care of Dec like I always have. You are going to go back to shooting people or whatever the hell you do all day.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Life isn’t fair! Obviously!” The doors open to the lobby and I sweep past him. “Time and time again, I learn that all cops are assholes. They don’t know how to do their job and they screw everyone over. Including you!” I scream.

Luckily it’s after hours and the building is closed. There aren’t any witnesses to this.

“Don’t lump me in with all cops. Some are bad, yes. Some shouldn’t have a badge, agreed. I can’t control the actions of all of them. I can only stop the corruption in this department. Lawson PD does not correlate with me. I can’t control what happens there but I can try to fix this.”

“You can’t. Declan’s case will be dismissed and then he’ll be a free man. The criminal justice system has failed me once again.” I turn my back and walk away. I walk away from him. I walk away from this case.

All I can do is focus on Dec, now. If Declan’s getting out then I need to protect him even more.