Forbidden Billionaire Rockstar (Raising Havoc Bandmates #4)

18. Jace

18

Jace

Three days of silence from Mallory, and my world has tilted off its axis. Each unanswered text is a dagger, and each averted glance is a twist of the blade. I’ve become a stranger even to myself - the calm, quiet Jace replaced by a man I barely recognize, all because of a woman who’s suddenly vanished from my life.

Was this her plan all along? Am I the only one who has been feeling more?

I shake my head and sit at the edge of my bed in the new hotel room, then glance at the clock resting on my nightstand. It’s about the time that Mallory would waltz into my room, begging me to please her, and I stare at the door for a few moments as if I’m going to magically make her appear.

I’m not going to get that lucky.

The realization hits me like a physical blow. I’ve spent years building walls, keeping everyone at arm’s length. Now, Mallory’s absence has left a hole in those defenses, and I’m exposed in a way I never expected to be.

This is ridiculous. I can’t remember the last time I missed having a woman in my bed, yet that’s all I’ve been able to do when it comes to Mallory. I’ve imagined her laughing more times than I can count as I lay in bed at night, staring up at the ceiling, and it’s taken a lot of strength not to storm onto her floor of the hotel to demand she give me what I’m craving.

My hands are itching to touch her smooth skin, my fingers eager to trace the outlines of her breasts, and my tongue desperate to explore the dip in her neck that makes her tremble in response. I crave to feel the rapid beat of her heart against my own as I roam my hands over her frame, digging my fingers into her waist and pressing my lips wildly against hers.

Just the thought has my dick hardening.

This craving for Mallory goes beyond physical desire. It’s seeped into every corner of my being, challenging everything I thought I knew about myself. When did she become so essential to my world? And more importantly, what am I willing to risk keeping her in it?

Tomorrow is another show night, which means I’ll be able to eye her from a distance without getting too close — that’s the only reprieve I’ve got. If touching her isn’t an option, looking at her is going to have to satisfy these urges clawing their way inside of me.

A rapid knock sounds on my door, and for a second, my heart leaps out of my chest, causing me to bolt upright. Is that her? She would’ve texted me, but maybe it’s a surprise visit because she couldn’t stand being away from me a second longer, either.

I smooth my hair back, then take a deep breath before sauntering over to the door and pulling it open.

Evan greets me on the other side, my heart deflating in the process, and he glances over my shoulder with an eyebrow raised. “Mind if I come in?”

“Uh, sure,” I mumble while stepping aside to allow him to pass by me.

When I shut the door, he spins around and crosses his arms in front of himself. “Alright, what’s going on?”

“You’re the one who came to my room, man. Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

He shakes his head and sinks onto the edge of my bed, then looks me in the eye with a stern frown. “No, I mean, what’s going on with you and Mallory?”

I blink, my mouth popping open slightly, then I chuckle. “I got no clue what you’re talking about.”

“Come on, man, it’s me you’re talking to,” Evan says, his voice a mix of concern and knowing. “Mia and I spent a good amount of time sneaking around. I recognize the signs.”

I feel exposed like Evan can see right through me. “It’s not... we’re not...”

“Nothing.”

“Jace,” he interrupts, “whatever it is, you need to get a handle on it. If I’ve noticed, Brent won’t be far behind.”

The mention of Brent’s name sends a chill down my spine. I’m not just risking my heart here - I’m risking a friendship, the band, everything.

As of right now, I’m not lying. She won’t respond to me, barely glances in my direction when we’re in the same vicinity, and I might as well be just another stranger to her. It hurts, but I can’t exactly fault her.

Maybe it was the night of stress relief I planned for her. Was it too much? She seemed to enjoy it. I remember detecting a small hint of emotion in her eyes, but maybe it wasn’t what she had expected from me with our agreement on the line.

“There’s nothing to be suspicious of.”

Evan lifts from his spot on the bed and walks past me, but before walking out of the room, he glances at me over his shoulder. “For what it’s worth, you seem different with her, and I kinda like it.”

“Kinda?”

He smirks. “Well, we can’t get too ahead of ourselves here. You’re still a pain in my ass like the other two.”

“Whatever,” I mutter. “Thanks for stopping by. Glad we had this chat.”

“Night, man.”

When he exits and shuts the door behind him, I’m left staring at the space where Mallory should be standing, wondering when I’ll be seeing her there again. This can’t be it, right? Maybe I need to show her this is more to me now, that I don’t just want her in my bed every night.

I want to have more conversations about the future, where we see ourselves in a few years, and what goals we have that could potentially tie together.

I’m a mess.

Yet, I can’t seem to stop.

This version of me - the one who pines, who plans romantic gestures, who can’t stop thinking about one woman - is foreign territory. But as unfamiliar as it feels, there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to go back to who I was before Mallory stormed into my life.

***

Stepping out of my dressing room, I'm engulfed by the whirlwind of pre-show preparations. In one corner, our instruments wait, gleaming under the lights, promising the thrill of the performance to come. It's a familiar scene but tonight, all I can focus on is the flash of blue that is Mallory's dress, a beacon in the pre-show madness.

Mallory is already standing backstage talking to Trevor — it’s the same guy who kept eyeing her up the last time they were talking. He’s doing it again, although he’s being a little more subtle about it, and I let out a low growl from the distance.

Mallory’s laughter carries across the room, a sound that used to be mine. Now it’s directed at Trevor, and jealousy claws at my insides. Each smile she gives him is a reminder of what I’ve lost, what I’m desperate to reclaim.

Just like she’s been doing ever since she walked out of my room, she doesn’t spare me a glance when I walk past the two of them, and I catch a hint of lavender as the air shifts between our bodies. I almost stop, more than content with inhaling the scent, but the sight of Brent standing a few feet away keeps me from doing that.

He’s staring at me, a frown on his face, and nudges his head toward Mallory when I come to a stop next to him. “You want to tell me what’s going on?”

I freeze, but try to keep my reaction blank as I look over at him. “What do you mean?”

“She can’t really be interested in that douche, right?”

Oh, he’s talking about Trevor.

“Not sure, man. She’s your sister. Just go ask her.”

He scoffs. “And get an earful about being up her ass and too involved with her life? I’d rather not. I thought you might know something, that’s all.”

“Why would you think that?”

“I’ve noticed you guys are getting along better. Just figured you were finally trying to be friends since we’ll be pretty close a little while longer.” He sighs and shakes his head. “It’s none of my business anyway, as long as he treats her right.”

I almost want to blurt out that the only person who can treat her right is the guy standing next to him, but I manage to keep my mouth shut. He keeps his eyes on Mallory and Trevor for a few more moments, then claps my back and disappears down a long hallway. It would be best if I followed his trail, but I can’t bring myself to stop watching the two of them.

She’s smiling brightly at him, her head thrown back as she laughs at something he says, and I stiffen when he angles his body closer to hers. It’s a small movement; most people wouldn’t take note of it, but I’m so keenly aware of it that I notice it immediately. Mallory seems oblivious, her attention more on his face than any other part of his body, and it makes me want to walk over there and pry him away from her.

Eventually, Sweet Surrender’s manager walks up to them and says something that causes Mallory’s face to fall and Trevor’s body to stiffen.

What could she have said?

When Trevor slowly backs away from Mallory, I can't help but notice the subtle changes in her demeanor. Her shoulders tense, her smile falters, and for a brief moment, I catch a glimpse of vulnerability in her eyes. It's a look I've seen before, in quiet moments when she thought no one was watching - a mix of doubt and determination.

As Hilary walks away, Mallory's fist clenches at her side. Her cheeks flush, and I can almost feel the storm of emotions brewing beneath her composed exterior. Is it anger at being interrupted? Embarrassment at being reprimanded? Or something deeper, a fear of failing at this new life she's trying so hard to build?

The urge to go to her, to offer comfort, is almost overwhelming. But I stay rooted in place, painfully aware that right now, I have no right to be her solace.

***

The rest of the show passes in a blur of lights, music, and adrenaline. I play on autopilot, my fingers finding the right chords even as my mind wanders. Every time I glance towards the wings, I'm searching for a flash of blue, for Mallory's face. But she's nowhere to be seen.

As we take our final bow, the roar of the crowd washing over us, I make a decision. This can't go on. The distance between Mallory and me is a physical ache that no amount of applause can fill.

Back in my hotel room, I pace like a caged animal. The post-show high that usually carries me through the night is absent, replaced by a restless energy I can't shake. My guitar sits untouched in the corner, the strings silent for the first time in years. Instead, my fingers itch to reach for my phone, to call Mallory, to bridge this chasm between us.

I catch my reflection in the mirror - disheveled hair, eyes bright with determination. This isn't the Jace Brooks the world knows. This is a man on the edge, ready to risk it all for a chance at something real.

My control snaps.

I've been giving Mallory the space I assume she needs, but that ends tonight. After seeing the way she looked with Trevor, I refuse to let him waltz into the picture and steal her from me.

She's mine — I'm going to make sure of it.

With a deep breath, I head for the door. It's time to lay all my cards on the table, consequences be damned.

When I come to a stop in front of the room, I know it is Mallory’s, thanks to the receptionist who easily gave me the information with a little flirting; my hands shake as I tap them against her door.

I’ve never been one to be nervous, but this could go one of two ways — she’ll either reject the idea or be excited about it.

It takes a few minutes, but eventually, Mallory swings the door open, and she blinks at me in surprise. “Uh, Jace, hey. Is everything okay?”

“Sweetheart, you’ve been avoiding me.”

She fidgets and shakes her head. “I’ve just been busy.”

“Flirting with your clients?”

Her stare turns icy, and she straightens her spine. “Excuse me?”

I shake my head and frown. “That’s not what I came by for.”

“Surely hope not,” she mutters, then cocks her hip. “What did you come for?”

“Let me take you out.”

Mallory blinks, then chuckles. “You’re joking, right?”

Am I that horrible? Is this really that funny?

“Uh, no?” I blow out a rough breath and run a hand through my hair. “One night at our next stop.”

One night to convince you that we can be more together.

She stares at me curiously and arches her brow. “What’s in it for you?”

I smirk. “Just a nice evening out in a city with a beautiful woman.”

“One night?”

“Mhm.” “What do you say, sweetheart?”

She doesn’t need to know that I fully intend for there to be more nights, and she can come to that conclusion on her own.

She’s silent for a moment, and then she shrugs her shoulders. “Why not? We’ve got to be careful, though. The last thing we need is for someone to catch sight of us.”

“Already ahead of you,” I say with a smile as I back away from the doorway.

As much as I want to step forward and wrap her in my arms, it might be the easiest way to get her crawling back into the hole she’s been hiding in. “Have a good night, sweetheart, and I’ll pick you up in a couple of days at seven.”

There’s a light in her eyes that wasn’t there earlier, and she nods. “Seven got it.”

She finally shuts the door, although it looks as though it’s the last thing she wants to do, and when it clicks, I spin around to head toward the elevators.

All I have to do is make sure this is a night she won’t be able to forget. By the end of it, she’ll be begging to crawl back into my arms, and I’ll be right where I want to be all over again.

As I walk away from Mallory's door, hope and anxiety wage war in my chest. This date is more than just a night out - it's a gamble with my heart as the stakes.

I've never been one to believe in fate, but as I picture Mallory's smile, I find myself praying to whatever cosmic force is listening. Let this be our beginning, not our end. Because I'm starting to realize that a future without Mallory by my side isn't just daunting - it's unthinkable.

The Jace who walked into this tour wouldn't recognize the man walking away from her door now and I'm okay with that. Because this version of me, the one who's willing to risk it all for one woman, feels more real than any stage persona I've ever worn.

As I step into the elevator, I make a silent vow. I'll show Mallory that what we have is worth fighting for. That I'm worth taking a chance on. Because she sure as hell is worth it to me.