Forbidden Billionaire Rockstar (Raising Havoc Bandmates #4)

21. Mallory

21

Mallory

“Friend.” The word echoes in my mind, a lie that tastes like ash on my tongue. There’s nothing friendly about the fire that ignites when Jace touches me or the way my heart races at his mere presence.

Tonight only fanned the flames of feelings I’m desperate to extinguish.

Learning more about Jace and the past he had to deal with only increased those feelings I’m desperate to keep to myself. When I called him my friend, he didn’t seem the least bit thrown off by the term, and that only proves that I was right to keep everything to myself.

It would only complicate things.

I'm well aware of how this looks. I’ve spent so long trying to prove I’ve changed, to be taken seriously. Now, just when I’m finally getting my footing, Jace threatens to upend everything. And the scariest part? A part of me wants to let him.

It's like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff, knowing the fall could destroy everything I've worked for, but still itching to jump.

“Well, here we are,” Jace says as we come to a stop in front of my hotel room.

“Hmm.”

For a moment, we’re silent, me staring at my feet because I’m afraid of what I’ll do if I look into his eyes, and Jace shifting uncomfortably at my side. There’s an awkward silence; neither of us really knows how we should end the night, and I clear my throat to cut the awkwardness.

“Thank you again, I had a nice time.”

I pull my key card out of my purse, the green lights shining immediately when I wave it in front of the black screen, but the moment my hand wraps around the doorknob, I’m being spun around until I’m facing Jace himself.

“What—”

Jace’s lips crash into mine, and suddenly, I’m drowning. I should push him away, end this before it consumes us both. But my traitorous heart has other plans. As his tongue seeks entrance, I’m powerless to resist.

His tongue pierces between my lips, parting them just enough for him to swirl it around my mouth, and I follow his movements with my own tongue. It feels like an eternity since I felt his hands all over my body, even though it’s only been a few days, and now that I’ve got another taste, there’s no way I can send him away.

I turn the knob and back into my room, pulling him right along with me without once breaking our kiss. He kicks the door shut. Not a care in the world that someone else may have heard it, and he pulls his lips from mine to brush them over my jaw.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” he whispers before dragging his tongue along my skin, goosebumps erupting in its wake until he stops at the neckline of my blouse.

This one is more provocative than the rest I brought with me, showcasing the assets I’ve been desperate to hide, and his heated stare snaps to my face. “You’re breathtaking, you know that?”

My cheeks heat and he smirks before putting all his attention back to my chest. He fiddles with the loose fabric of my shirt, tugging it down gently to brush his lips against the thick flesh of my breasts, and I let my head fall back while arching my back into him.

“I can’t hold myself back anymore, sweetheart. If you want me to stop, tell me now.”

His words ricochet through me, and I stare at him, unmoving. He’s giving me an out right now, allowing me the chance to walk away, but there’s no way in hell that’s about to happen. It’s been torture to watch him sauntering around the venues, making sure he’s not watching me when I survey him, and having to keep my distance.

There’s no way I can keep that distance now, though.

When I don’t say anything, Jace takes a simple step back that has me whimper softly, and within seconds, he’s tugging the blouse from my frame to toss it on the floor. My room isn’t as nice as his, but it’s large enough that there’s a small living room and kitchenette right before the bedroom.

I don’t even know if I can make it to the bed at the rate my pussy is aching for him. Each time his fingers graze my skin, the need only increases, and it’s only a matter of seconds before it explodes into fiery passion.

“Turn around, sweetheart,” Jace whispers against my skin.

Without a single complaint, I do as he says and turn so that my back is to him. I shiver when his fingers brush over the small of my back, the zipper sliding down the only sound between the two of us, and when it falls into a puddle at my feet, I calmly step out of it. Instead of turning back around to face him, I keep my spine straight and wait for his next command.

“ Fuck ,” he mutters behind me, then I feel the ghost of his touch as he skates across the lace panties I’m wearing before trailing it up my spine and stopping at the matching bra. “Red looks good on you, sweetheart.”

His compliment makes me shiver, but I still manage to keep facing forward.

“Look at me.”

I’ve never been happier to hear a command. Within seconds, I turn around, eyes clashing with the heated stare he’s got aimed at my chest, and I rub my thighs together. Something tells me after tonight that things are going to get drastically different, but I can’t bring myself to care too much about that when he’s looking at me like I’m the most exquisite piece of art he’s ever gotten the chance to see.

We’ll deal with things tomorrow.

Tonight, I’m giving in to my desires and not feeling one bit sorry about them.

Jace trails his fingers over my bare skin, goosebumps erupting in their wake, and I suck in a sharp breath as his fingers dip beneath my panties and he applies pressure to my clit. Sensations run rampant inside of me, making me dizzy with lust and desire.

His eyes lock onto mine as he rubs his thumb over my clit slowly, my belly dipping dramatically from the pleasure it brings, and I rotate my hips into him.

“Impatient little thing, aren’t you?”

I let out a low growl, which causes him to chuckle, and I jerk when he increases his movements. “ Yes ,” I moan.

“God,” he groans, his eyes boring into mine while keeping the same rhythm with his fingers. I could listen to those moans on repeat and never get tired of them.”

Every word out of his mouth only has my pleasure heightening, reaching a distance I didn’t know was possible, and I only want more. I reach down, desperate to feel him and push my hand into his pants until I’ve got my fingers wrapped around his hard length.

A few curses fly from his mouth, and he shoves his hips forward, taking exactly what he needs from me. He pushes a finger into my entrance, then adds another that forces me back and onto the bed. My hand pulls away from him, falling limply at my side, and he smirks at me.

“Right where I wanted you,” he rasps before leaning down and closing his mouth over my nipple.

Instinctively, my legs part to allow him entry between them, and he curls his fingers inside of me before pulling them out. I whimper, hating the loss of his touch, and he winks before tugging his pants down. His length bobs, and my breath hitches at the sight — one I’m sure I’ll never get tired of.

He reaches out, grabs hold of my thigh, and rolls me until I’m lying flat on my stomach. I’m panting, pussy clenching in response, and he reaches around my stomach to lift me up. The air that grazes my ass is nothing compared to the heat his body brings as he steps closer.

“You look so pretty like this,” he whispers while running his fingers over my spine.

Electricity shoots through, enough so that I push my ass closer to him in desperation. I need more.

Although it’s only seconds, it feels like hours before I feel him teasing my entrance with his dick, and I grip the sheets like my life depends on it. In one swift thrust, he’s fully inserted himself into me, and I gasp into the mattress — the last thing anyone needs is to hear me from the other side of the walls.

“You were made for me,” Jace grinds out, his thrusts getting faster and harder.

Exactly what I wanted.

The high I’ve been feeling only makes me dizzy, and his fingers digging into my waist is a delicious welcome. His thrusts become more and more frantic with each one, the bed shaking in response, and I let out a moan that would alert the whole floor if my face were pressed against the mattress.

“ Yes, Jace,” I say as softly as I can manage.

“Let go for me,” he grinds out. “I’m not sure I can last much longer. You feel too damn good.”

Just like that, white dots form, and I cry out into the darkness. I’m still reeling from the intensity of my orgasm when Jace grunts behind me, movements jerking and pauses while he takes deep breaths. As soon as he pulls out of me, I immediately frown at the loss but roll onto my back.

When I steal a look at Jace, he’s still got that heated look in his eyes that tells me our night is far from over.

Give in to desires. Worry tomorrow.

That’s going to be my new mantra when it comes to this man.

***

The soft morning light filters through the curtains, casting a warm glow across the room. I smile against it. Last night runs through my mind on replay — Jace devouring me on the leather couch after shedding every article of clothing I had on, leaving the heels on my feet, him carrying me into the kitchenette where he got a second orgasm out of me, and finally making it to the bed.

I can still taste the hint of wine on my lips from our shared bottle. The sheets are a tangled mess around my legs, cool against my skin where Jace's body heat does not warm them.

My legs ache as I turn onto my back, staring at the ceiling, and I smirk at the stiffness. Jace wasted no time showing me how much he’s missed me over the last several days, and I’m not complaining. I welcome the pain in my muscles.

The memories fade when my phone beeps once, then a second and third time, and only when it chimes a fourth do I finally reach over and grab it from the nightstand where Jace must’ve placed it after I fell asleep.

He doesn’t so much as stir next to me, his heavy snores echoing around me, and I smile at the sight of his tousled hair covering the pillow. His bare back is on full display, and if it wasn’t for someone messaging me incessantly, I would run my fingers along the tan skin.

There are plenty of messages waiting for me, some of which I received while I was asleep, but the ones that catch my attention are from Sweet Surrender, asking me to meet with them as soon as possible. My heart drops, and I try to think back to my work. If there’s anything I may have forgotten to do, nothing comes to mind.

I’ve been doing pretty well since Hilary gave me a final warning.

Maybe it’s nothing.

They could be asking for a meeting simply because there’s something new they want me to work on, even though they’ve been allowing me the freedom to do whatever needs to be done. Their socials have been increasing each passing day, so it makes sense they might want me to do more.

I carefully climb out of bed and head into the bathroom, taking care of business as usual, then pull an outfit from my suitcase. Jace stirs slightly but doesn’t so much as blink up at me as I busy myself with looking presentable enough for my clients. There’s an awful feeling in my gut, but I don’t pay it any mind as I slip on a pair of heels and make my way out of the room.

I’ll be back soon, so there’s no reason to say anything to Jace. He’s likely to still be asleep by the time I get back, anyway.

With each step towards Trevor’s room, dread coils tighter in my gut. It’s as if my body knows something my mind hasn’t caught up to yet. I take a deep breath, steeling myself. Whatever’s waiting behind that door, I’ll face it head-on.

I take a moment to control my feelings before knocking lightly on his door. It takes a few moments, but eventually, he pulls the door open and gives me a fleeting, uncomfortable glance.

“Mallory," he murmurs, his voice low and guarded. “Come inside. We’ve been waiting for you.”

Stepping inside, I see Hilary standing apart from the others, her arms crossed as she watches me. The rest of the guys are perched on the edge of Trevor's bed, looking uneasy. I look at everyone with a frown. “Good morning. You guys needed me?”

Trevor opens his mouth to speak, but Hilary pushes away from the wall and takes over the conversation. “Yes, Miss Dominic, what we’d all like to know is why you’ve been sneaking behind our backs with Raising Havoc’s lead guitarist.”

I blink, my mouth falling open in shock. “Excuse me?”

As far as I know, it’s not against any rules for me to have relations with members of Raising Havoc… but maybe it’s something I missed.

“The real question,” Hilary says, only getting angrier by the second, “is how you could let something like a relationship get in the middle of the work you should be doing for Sweet Surrender.”

Trevor clears his throat behind me and says, “It’s all over social media, Mallory. There’s no use in denying it.”

“Social media?”

If it’s all over social media, that must mean Brent has seen it.

Oh, hell.

The realization hits me like a punch to the gut. Brent. My brother, Jace's bandmate. I've potentially blown up the band's dynamic, jeopardized friendships, and maybe even put Raising Havoc's future at risk. And for what? A few stolen moments of happiness?

“But what does my relationship have to do with my work?”

“Nothing, if it didn’t distract you on the job,” Hilary mutters. She shakes her head and frowns. “Unfortunately, this is where we sever ties and wish you the best. I tried to make it work, I really did, but we can’t have you getting distracted any more than you already have.”

“You’re firing me because of a relationship with Jace?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.

Trevor sighs, his eyes not quite meeting mine. “It’s out of my hands, Mallory.”

“That’s it? I don’t even get a chance to defend myself?” The desperation in my voice is unmistakable, raw emotion bleeding through every word.

Hilary’s short, dry laugh cuts through the room. “You’ve proven enough that you don’t have what it takes. If it were up to me, you’d have been gone at the first mistake.”

Each word is a dagger, confirming my deepest fears. I’m not enough. I’ll never be enough.

Paxton and Ledger stare at me, frowning, but don’t deny her words, and Trevor looks torn about what he should do. Either way, no one defends me, and that’s enough for me to rush out of their room.

When I get back into mine, the tears finally fall, and they only get worse when I note the unmade bed that’s empty of Jace’s frame.

Maybe he realized I wasn’t enough, too.

My suitcase lies open on the floor, my clothes hanging out of it. I take a deep breath before shoving everything back inside. As I collect my things, I make sure not to leave anything behind.

As I close my suitcase, my phone buzzes. Brent’s name flashes on the screen, but I can’t bear to hear his voice right now. With trembling fingers, I power it off.

The silence that follows is deafening.

I survey the room one last time, my eyes landing on the rumpled sheets where Jace and I had lain just hours ago. Now, like my dreams of proving myself, the bed is cold and empty.

Jace couldn’t get out fast enough. And now, neither can I.

As I close the door behind me, the finality of the click echoes in my chest. I'm not just leaving behind a job or a room. I'm walking away from the person I thought I could be, the dreams I dared to have.

Funny how life works. I set out to prove I've changed, but here I am, the same old me, still managing to mess up everything I touch.

But as I make my way down the hall, suitcase in tow, a small spark of defiance ignites in my chest. Maybe I'm not enough for Sweet Surrender.

Maybe I'm not the perfect professional Mallory I've been trying so hard to be.

But I'm not nothing, either. I'm messy and complicated and apparently still capable of bringing chaos into my life. But I'm also resilient. I've rebuilt myself before. I can do it again.

I don't know what's waiting for me, but for the first time in a long time, I'm ready to face it as the real me – whoever that turns out to be.