Forbidden Cowboy (Rocky Ridge Creek #1)

Chapter Three

HOPE

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I’VE FANTASIZED ABOUT the moment I would belittle Levi for the way he left things between us.

What kind of asshole spends the day swimming in the creek with a girl and the evening kissing her under the moonlight to altogether avoiding and ignoring her indefinitely?

The Wilde kind, that’s who.

I yearned for the satisfaction of finally saying my peace and the closure to follow. I feel neither satisfied nor the latter.

Instead, I’m thirsty for the second half of my fantasy, where we finish what we started with that kiss all those years ago.

Drunken Earl’s snore evolves into a hacking cough.

Yeah, that’s why they’re called fantasies because they’re not realistic.

Levi’s eyes soften, and I don’t like it. “It wasn’t my intention to hurt you.”

“Shame on me for not listening to my father. They’ll use you and take what they want. They’ll break your heart. They’ll leave you out in the sun to die.”

His dark eyebrows draw together in a look of pain. “I broke your heart?”

Fiddlesticks! Did I say that out loud?

“No. You used me, Wilde.”

“I never used you. Not once.”

I spin my glass, staring at the condensation ring on the table. “You and I have very different definitions of what friendship is. And mine does not include turning your back on someone without an explanation.”

“I broke your heart.”

“You didn’t break my damn heart!” This conversation is going sideways fast.

Earl mutters something about going home. It’s as good an excuse as any to leave.

“I’m glad you won’t be helping with the kissing booth.” I stand. “I’ll leave you to your drinking alone.”

I can smell the alcohol stench penetrating from the booth Earl’s using for a bed. “I’ll take him home before the meeting crowd arrives,” I call to Bucky.

“I’ll pack your wings to go.”

“Thank you.” My knees dig into the ripped leather seat. I grasp handfuls of Earl’s faded plaid shirt and yank him into a sitting position. He slumps against the back of the seat like deadweight. A groan rumbles up his chest, followed by an incoherent mumble-jumble. But he’s still passed out.

“Come on, Earl, help a gal out.”

“You can’t be serious.” Levi is over my shoulder. “There’s no way in hell you’re getting him home by yourself.”

“You got a better idea?” I lightly slap Earl’s cheeks. “Come on. Wakey-wakey.”

“I’ll do it.”

I glare over my shoulder. “Do you even know where he lives? You come to town as often as the plague.”

“I was born and raised here just like you. I ain’t forgotten where the town drunk lives.”

“Y’all take my pickup.” A set of keys rattle on the table beside my takeout bag of wings. “Out the back door.” Bucky points down a dark hallway where the bathrooms are located.

“Alright, you drunken fool.” Levi lifts me out of the way in a swift motion and hauls Earl out of the booth like the beer belly of a man is weightless.

I meet his gaze with a glare.

“Are you going to grab his other arm?”

I cross my arms over my front. “Are you sure you want my help?”

“I’m helping you, darlin’. Lead the way.”

With a half-irritated and half-appreciative sigh, I hook Earl’s other arm over my shoulder while muttering, “Don’t you dare feel sorry for me. I would never fall in love with a Wilde. Especially not an asshole like you.” I snatch the bag of wings with my free hand.

Levi’s arm reaches across the front of Earl, and his gentle finger lifts my chin. The tiny gesture sends heat flaming through my body like wildfire.

I’m a liar. I didn’t only fall in love with a Wilde. I’m still in love with him.

“I wasn’t always an asshole.”

I know that. Deep down, I do. But the last thing I wanted tonight was his pity. “Are you sure?”

His jaw tightens. For a second, I think he’ll retract his offer to help me. Maybe it’s for the best. But without another word, we drag Earl out the back door. Bucky’s old rusted jalopy awaits us.

“I don’t know why the old man doesn’t buy a new truck.” The passenger door creaks and groans when Levi heaves it open. “Lord knows he has the money.”

“Maybe not everyone’s looking around the corner for the next best thing to abandon for the good thing they have now.”

“This rust bucket is not a good thing.” Levi hoists Earl into the front seat and shoves him into the middle.

I swat Levi out of the way and climb in beside Earl. “I was talking about you.” I slam the truck door in his face.

It’s a five-minute drive to Earl’s pale yellow-sided house. Besides the scrap piles overgrown with weeds and broken shutters, the place isn’t bad. It isn’t great. But the issues appear to be mainly cosmetic.

We dump the drunken fool on the couch. The springs must be busted because his deadweight body sinks into the cushions. I leave the bag of wings on the cluttered kitchen table.

Silently, Levi and I mosey back inside the truck.

Levi turns over the keys, and the hunk of junk sputters. “Come on.” He twists the keys again.

A sputter and chatter.

“I’ll check the battery.” Levi clambers out of the truck and pops the hood. He rattles and clangs under the hood for five minutes before he opens my door.

“The battery’s dead. We’re walking. Unless, of course, you’d like to call one of your sisters for a ride.”

I send him a dumbfounded look. “Do you want to call one of your brothers?”

We share a knowing look as we begin our trek together. We don’t call a single soul for fear of sparking rumors.

A block down the road, and the humidity is sinking into my skin. A roll of thunder threatens. The black clouds are rapidly sweeping above us.

“Looks like Bucky’s prediction is spot on.” I pull my wrap tighter around my arms.

“Indeed.” I catch Levi lifting his head to the darkened sky from the corner of my eyes. Age and worry have etched lines on his once-baby face. Don’t get me wrong; they’re sexy as hell. He’s sexy as hell. But I wonder if he smiles less now and worries more.

He breaks the silence this time. “My pa used to say the same thing to me.”

“That you’re an asshole?”

His low rumble chuckle stirs a flutter in my stomach. “I’d be a liar if I said no.”

A smile steals my lips. So natural. So right with him.

“My old man warned us about the Fox dames and their lust games.”

I laugh now. “Our lust games.” I snap my fingers. “Yes, those are my favorite. I intentionally initiated this drunken Earl and broken truck escapade to lure you in with my lust games.”

“You’re doing a shoddy job.”

Another laugh peals up my chest. I smack his arm at his teasing, enjoying how easy it is to fall back into our old ways. But the touch lights my skin on fire. And the way his head whips to look at the contact before his heated gaze lands on mine conveys mutual desire. There will never be going back with us. We could never be just friends.

The silence stretches between us once again.

We automatically cut through the old Underwood property. It’s a shortcut most locals dare to venture into. In the 20th century, the town's schoolhouse was run by Isabel Underwood. The Victorian house sits abandoned and is said to be haunted.

We trudge along the path of flattened grass. “Our folks aren’t right, you know.” I feel a drop of rain on my shoulder.

Levi doesn’t skip a step in front of me. Nor does he comment.

“Pitting us against each other from young,” I continue. “We shouldn’t hate each other because your great-great-great grandfather stole our cow.”

“He didn’t steal it. The cow rightfully belonged to the Wildes.”

“It had the Fox stamp.”

“Sold to my family by a Fox.”

“A Fox who just happened to be murdered before he could testify.”

“It’s quite suspicious, isn’t it?”

I scoff. “Are you seriously defending the pathetic excuse for a feud between our families?”

He glances over his shoulder, wearing a huge shit-faced smirk. “Darlin’, never. But you getting so worked up about it —” Levi licks his lips.

I don’t know why, but something about the way he’s looking at me makes me mad as a bull. “Now, who’s playing the lust games?” I storm past him, and he catches my arm. The pearls of rain are increasing.

“Hey, what’d I say?”

“It’s what you didn’t say. Twelve years ago, when you walked away from me without a word. You let the rumors of an innocent kiss destroy everything we’d built. And instead of defending us, standing up for us, speaking up, you sat back and didn’t say a damn word.”

His fingers tighten around my arm. His jaw clenches. “It’s not that simple.” He storms past me.

A clap of thunder cracks like a bullwhip.

“What’s not that simple?”

His boots stomp off the path into the high weeds as he takes a shortcut by the old metal swing set.

I have to run to catch up. “What’s not that simple, Levi? Our friendship? Or was that a sham too? You were my best friend. But maybe the feeling wasn’t mutual. Or were you using me the way you claim you didn’t?” When he doesn’t reply, I grab his muscled arm. “I’m talking to you, dammit. What’s not that simple?!”

He spins to face me. “Everything. Every goddam thing about us isn’t simple. Our last names. Our friendship. That goddam kiss!”

The sky dumps on us. Within seconds, sheets of rain soak me to the core—lightning cracks in the distance. Almost immediately, thunder rolls from the sky. The storm is creeping closer.

My hand disappears in Levi’s large hand. “We gotta take shelter!” His shout howls through the loud wind. “We can sneak into the back door of the Underwood house.”

I yank my hand away, surprised when his tight grip lets me go. “Answer the question!”

He points to the sky. “You see those clouds? Those are lightning clouds. We need to get inside.” He reaches for my hand again.

“What about that kiss? Didn’t you like it? Did it embarrass you? Embarrassed your family? That’s a pretty darn simple answer.”

Levi throws his arms in the air. “For fucks sake, now is not the time.”

“It’s never the time for you!” I fold my arms over my front. The rain blurs my vision. The wind wrestles with my wrap. “I spent a year trying to find time in your busy schedule, and I’m not moving until you tell me why.”

A roar, sounding as painful as a fox’s cry, rumbles up his chest. He’s in front of me now. So close I can feel the heat penetrating off him. His chest huffs up and down. Water runs down his twisted and strained facial features.

“I fucking loved that kiss. Nothing in my life has ever felt as right as that kiss. But I was sixteen, and a Wilde isn’t supposed to fall in love witha Fox. I refused to let our family quarrel hurt you. I refused to hurt you. I let you go so you could find a man without my baggage. A man who could make you happy.”

The words buzz in my ears. I’m trying to figure out what they could possibly mean. I keep coming back to the same conclusion.

“You fell in love with me?”

His hand cups my face. The pad of his thumb runs over my lower lip. “Why else would I ever walk away from you? You were my best friend.”

The second half of my fantasy pops into my mind, but it’s quickly extinguished.

“Levi, the hair on my arm is standing up.” It’s a well-known indication lightning is close.

“Run. Run!”

I let him pull me toward the house. A sizzle pierces the air, followed by an intense crack and what sounds like many sticks of dynamite being detonated. A lightning bolt hits the swing set. I scream and squint against the flash of white light. The loud and powerful boom vibrates the ground. My ears ring, and I crouch to the ground.

Levi pulls me on. “Come on.” He guides me to the house and kicks in the back door. “Inside.” He pushes me in first, then follows.

I can’t see a thing, but it’s not my first time here. It’s pitch black inside. The wood planks nailed to the windows leave only enough room for small streams of light between the cracks. All the kids sneak into the Underwood haunted house at some point to catch a glimpse of the little girl’s spirit who roams the halls.

“You alright?” Levi spins me, and his hands touch my face, shoulders, and arms. His strong hands clutch my hips. “Hope, are you hurt anywhere?” The tone of his voice reminds me of the time I fell during one of the many hikes we took together. He was right there. Quick. Caring. Loving.

I miss him.

I want him.

This might be the last time I’m alone with Levi. He’s made it clear we’re complicated. Not simple. But he’s also made it clear he wants me. I’ve already spent too long of my life wondering what it would feel like to touch him. To have him touch me. To kiss him and feel his kisses. I need him now more than I ever have in my entire life.

Maybe my head’s still spinning from the lightning. Or perhaps the lightning cleared away the fog of everyone else, always warning me to stay away from a Wilde.

I slide my fingers under the hem of his shirt. I feel him still as my fingertips graze the waistline of his skin.

“I’m okay.” My voice is a cracked whisper.

The rain, thunder, and lightning sing a melody in the distance.

My hands trail a path up his bare chest. His woodsy ranch smell is a familiar scent I will never get enough of. It will always leave me wanting more.

“Hope —” His voice battles objection and want. The fear, desire, and lust mirror my own emotions.

“Levi.” I rise to the tips of my toes, pressing our bodies closer together. “No one’s here to tell us what we should and shouldn’t be feeling. To remind us you’re a Wilde and I’m a Fox.” I nibble on his scruffy chin. “It’s just you and me.”

The tips of his fingers dig through the material of my dress. “We can’t—”

“We can.” I lightly graze my lips across his. Tender. Barely a touch.

“We shouldn’t—”

I guide one of his hands to my breast. “Then walk away.”

It’s what he’s best at.

His groan turns into a moan as his mouth claims mine in a strong and forceful kiss.