Golden Burn (Songs of Crime #1)

35. Etta

35

Etta

‘Happy and Sad’ - Kacey Musgraves

I ’m floating on a cloud that’s come to me from another dimension. My feet don’t penetrate the floor, not for the entire length of the hallway as myself and my new husband head toward the formal dining room.

Odin was mine in that room. Mine to kiss, mine to command, mine to see . He was more than the partner I asked him to be last night. He was my husband.

Now, I sense something inside of him is rebelling. His aura pulses like that of a confused and dangerous animal. I know it’s not directed at me. But in this room, with these people, I’m not sure how he is going to accomplish that.

I see Martise first. She rushes to me and envelops me in a hug. I cling to her for a few extra seconds. When we pull away, the worry in the corner of her eyes is obvious, and it transfers to me tenfold. “Everything alright?”

I’m not sure if she’s asking because she witnessed the slap or because of something more. Odin is soon next to us. “Let’s get this over with.”

Martise nods and lets go of my arms. Before she pulls away, she leans in to whisper, “Don’t antagonize Cerbera. I don’t think Odin will let it slide so easily and I don’t want any blood on my new dress.”

Swallowing, I leave to find my seat next to Odin. He pulls it out to help me sit. His hands trail down my spine. My eyes flutter when he keeps them there. Then I sense the heat of a dozen eyes on us, and I twist in my seat, breaking his contact.

Odin spins to face the long table, both of us at the head of it. Martise, Dom, and Ford are all the way down at the end. Away from us. I can’t recall the seating chart in full clarity, but I don’t think Dom would have done this. Someone not in our inner circle has changed the seating. I try to find Gwen, see if she can fix it, but she’s nowhere to be seen. Probably hiding from Leo/Henry. Unfortunately, there’s no time to change it, and even if I could, it will only cause chaos, something we definitely do not need.

Cerbera finds his seat next to me. Before he drops into it, he leans over and places two kisses on each of my cheeks. I try not to gag when his aftershave assaults me and overpowers what is left of Odin’s. “Congratulations Mrs. Bolt,” he says. I nod in thanks as he sits, and the servers bring out our first course.

I try to eat, but I can’t. My gloved hands are shaking. Odin is like a wall of marble next to me. Unfeeling on the outside, a torrent of emotions on the inside. I want to take his hand under the table, but everyone is watching us so closely, someone would notice. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if Cerbera set up cameras above and below the table.

“So, where is the honeymoon?” someone asks. A man to my right that I don’t know.

“None of your concern,” Odin cuts in. His hand is gripping his steak knife too tightly. The stranger clocks it and returns to his food.

Cerbera, chuckling to himself, eats with his mouth ajar, his position easy. I sense he’s doing it to rile Odin up. He’s doing a good job of affecting me, too. “That was some ceremony,” he says, his teeth stained red with wine.

“Yes,” I agree, picking at my meal.

“Did it feel good to hit him?”

I fight an outraged tremble. “No.”

Smiling cruelly, he shifts to Odin. “And you, Odin? How does it feel to be married for the second time?” The room tilts. The tension overflows. Odin fixes Cerbera with a death stare unlike any I have ever witnessed. Cerbera pounces. “Oh, does the new Mrs. Bolt not know?”

A commotion at the end of the table reverts everyone’s focus. Ford and Martise are standing, both covered in wine. They try to dry each other off, mumbling apologies. Using the distraction, I slip my hand under the table and grab Odin. His palm fits perfectly against mine, his fingers tight. I wish I had the superpower to speak inside his head. Maybe I could send him images of how he kissed me in the private room from my perspective. Maybe then he’d see how amazing he is.

I watch Cerbera as he takes in the situation. I think he knows Ford and Martise aren’t the clumsy type. He doesn’t make any more inappropriate comments for the rest of the meal.

Unlike a traditional wedding, there are no speeches, no bridal waltz, no cutting of the cake and no dancing till the early morning. There is no interaction between the bride and groom besides a few silent, unreadable stares. And thankfully, because of this, the ordeal comes to an end within an hour.

At the conclusion, a few of the guests whose names I don’t care to know come and wish us a flat congratulations. I’m not fully in the moment. I’m itching to get to the car and away, tucked safe within our room back at the hotel. Odin is still unsteady, a kettle close to boiling. I want to hug him so badly.

Unfortunately, Cerbera sees how close we are to leaving and decides that it’s time to deliver his final strike. Taking my hands in his, he plasters on a concerned facade, leans in close, but speaks loud enough for Odin to hear. “Enjoy tonight,” he says, his breath unnaturally sour. “I’m sure Odin will be gentle with you. But it shouldn’t matter, considering your pussy is as used as all the cutlery in this restaurant.”

Oh no.

Odin moves as quickly as a flash on a camera. He grabs Cerbera by the neck and slams him up against the nearest wall, taking out his gun to press underneath Cerbera’s neck.

Cerbera’s face is red, his hands near the waist of his belt were too slow to retrieve his own weapon. My heart is exploding, booming in my ears. Ford approaches, gun at the ready, while the other men and women watch on. A few have their weapons out, but none are making a move. Not until Odin does. If he snaps and shoots, this wedding will end in smoke and blood.

The idea is enough to send me to my knees.

I can’t lose him just as I found him.

Oh my God. Is this what he felt for ten years? Only worse? This crushing, horrible pressure in the chest that is like an atom bomb detonating and staying contained under the skin.

I open my mouth to speak his name but stop short when I feel Dom grab my wrist. “Don’t,” he warns.

Watching on, I listen as Odin speaks like a river of darkness is pouring from his mouth.

“Listen to me carefully,” he seethes, digging the gun harder into Cerbera’s neck. “If you ever speak to my wife like that again, I will unload every bullet I can find into your fucking stomach.” Cerbera jerks, trying to get out from under Odin’s crushing hold, the veins in his head popping from the strain. Even though Odin is the slimmer of the two, his strength and fury are unmatched. “And if you even think about coming for me, spying on me, sending fucking letters in the middle of the night, I will do more than dump your product in the Hudson. I will set your entire inventory on fire. You will have nothing. You will be nothing.” Then, only to add more wind to the fire, Odin pushes him over the edge. “This is the part where you say, yes, boss.”

Cerbera grunts, his body rebelling. “Go on,” Odin taunts, pressing him harder against the wall.

“Yes, boss,” Cerbera spits between clenched teeth.

Odin moves the end of the gun to Cerbera’s temple. “Don’t contact me until you learn some fucking manners. Until then, everything you own is mine.”

I take my first breath in minutes when Odin comes up to me, grabs my hand—instead of my wrist—and pulls me out onto the street to a car that is ready and waiting. We slip in, Dom, Ford, and Martise getting into another behind us. Once the door is closed, Odin barks for the driver to head to the hotel. The car purrs to life.

Not even a second later, he grabs my face and kisses me like he’s starving. Frantic, I haul him against me and meet his movements, strength for strength.

Our tongues collide, forcing moans to slip into each other’s mouths. His hands shake as they grab me, ruining my pristine dress and appearance. I don’t care. He can do whatever he wants, whatever he needs to feel human again.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers as he kisses me. “I can’t keep doing this to you.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” I reassure him. Breaking the kiss, I wrap my arms around his shoulders and just hug him. I know he needs it. He sighs into my neck, holding me tight.

“We’re getting out of here, we’re going somewhere private,” he says.

“Yes,” I beg, holding onto his biceps as we lean away to look at each other.

“It won’t be far. But I think we should do it the more traditional way.”

I kiss him, my answer for everything he has to ask me. I’d go anywhere with him right now. I’d go to Antarctica and battle the arctic winds. I’d go to the Sahara and sleep amongst the blistering sand dunes. I’d go to the ends of the earth for this man. And from the way he holds me, I think he feels the same thing.

The car takes us to the hotel, but we don’t head inside.

Dom and Ford bombard us by the window as an employee packs the trunk with our suitcases.

“This is stupid, Odin.” Ford remarks.

“I’m inclined to agree,” Dom adds.

“It’s completely off the map.”

Dom isn’t convinced. “He will find you.”

“He can’t come for me. Not yet. The wedding contract sealed us together. He needs to gain something first before he strikes at me. We’ll be gone for a week. If you want to come, there’s a spare bedroom. ”

Ford frowns. “I’d rather not listen to you two consummate.”

“I’ll book us somewhere in Mykonos. It’s close enough that we can get to you,” Dom says.

“Fine.” Odin holds out his hand for Dom to hand over our passports. He reluctantly passes them, then Odin winds the window up and we drive back out into the traffic.

“What about Juniper and Romeo?” I ask him.

“Martise offered to look after them until we get back.”

“She’s the best.” I kick my legs up so they’re lying across his lap. He holds them in place, his thumb running across the satin material.

“Did you want to get changed?”

“No. I want to wear it until you carry me over the threshold.” Odin chuckles, and it makes my chest sparkle. “My mom said she slept in her dress the night of her wedding because she loved it so much. I kind of want to do the same thing.”

“Sounds perfect,” he says. And it does, it really does.

We make it to the airport eventually, our lips numb from kissing. It’s so odd to walk in through the main doors, onto the floor packed with people. Odder still to have everyone staring at us in our wedding attire. Odin takes it all in his stride. I’m sure he’s used to people looking at him because of his eyepatch. I want to growl at those who stare too long, but he keeps tugging me along, our joined hands unbreakable.

We check in and go through customs. All the airport employees give me a funny look and ask something in Italian. Odin makes the same remark every time. “è una bellissima sposa. Sono un uomo fortunato.”

And all I can think about is how much more there is to learn about him.

We find the gate and take a seat in the corner. The only thing in my possession is my passport and ticket, and Odin’s free hand. And right now, it’s the only thing I need.

On the plane, the stares continue. But we aren’t aware, not when we take our seats and watch the world become small as the plane takes off. The hostesses give us free champagne to celebrate our nuptials. We take a sip from each other’s glasses as the clouds glow pink in the distance.

“I never thought I’d like traveling so much,” I say when the cabin is quiet. Other travelers watch movies, listen to music or read books. My new husband and I can’t stop talking.

“You never had the chance.”

“No, not everyone is rich.” I give him a playful shove and he chuckles, grabbing my lips in a quick kiss.

“My father might have been an asshole, but his money was good.”

“Is he still around?”

“He passed away five years ago. We didn’t talk after Gen was killed. I forgot he even existed. When he died, a doctor called me and told me, and I just said thanks, and hung up.”

I slip my arm under his, leaning my head onto his shoulder. “And your mom?”

“Cancer. She died when I was five. I don’t remember much of her, unfortunately.”

“I’m sorry. That’s awful.”

Odin kisses my head. “Yeah, but I found my family. Dom and Ford kept me alive when my father wished I’d died, too. Blood isn’t as important as everyone makes it out to be.” I hum in reply, remembering having the very same thoughts in reference to my own father.

“If you had to sell all your properties and keep only one, which would it be?” I ask.

He doesn’t even hesitate. “I have a farm in Montana.”

“Did you just read my mind?” I ask. Odin smirks. “I was thinking that I would love to own a farm.”

“It was built in the early 1900s, has a single stable for some animals, a small creek out the back, and good soil. I bought it when I found out Gen was pregnant. I thought it would be our family home.” His voice is somber, but not pained. It’s nice knowing he feels comfortable to talk about her. I don’t want him to ever think he can’t. Speaking about our loved ones is cathartic. “I just… I couldn’t get rid of it,” he says.

“Maybe there was a reason for that,” I offer.

He takes his jacket off and slips it onto my shoulders. I snuggle into it, enjoying the warmth infused into the material. “Maybe,” he says. “Marrying a vet seems like a good reason to keep it.”

“Think of what I could do with it,” I say gleefully. He looks nervous. “I’d totally turn it into a zoo.”

“Just no cats.”

I gasp. “How dare you. Happy wife, happy life, right?”

“Right.” Odin smiles and wraps his arm around me. “Fine. You can have Romeo. That’s it.”

“Alright,” I concede.

Odin doesn’t speak. Then, “You’d find every stray cat in the area and bring it back, wouldn’t you?”

Muffling my laughter, I shrug and say, “I guess you’ll have to find out.”

We arrive in Athens airport and immediately catch a taxi to the harbor. But instead of getting on the public ferry, Odin picks up our luggage and takes me over to a private boat.

“What happened to the more traditional way?” I jest, pointing to the decent sized yacht.

“I want to impress my wife,” he says, and the way that word rolls off his tongue is so sexy it makes me forget people are around. It makes me want to hitch my dress up. Odin recognizes the gleam in my eyes. “Don’t tempt me.”

Chuckling, I pick up my dirty hem and follow him on board. A host of crew greet me by my new term—Mrs. Bolt. And each time, I see him swell in my periphery.

The boat is stylish and expensive, with cream leathers, LED lights, and tinted windows. Odin guides me onto the deck and sits us on one of the lounges. A crew member brings us some food and water and we both dig in till it’s all gone.

The boat takes off, water churns, the city of Athens becomes a speck on the black horizon. Exhaustion consumes me. Yawning, I shift so my legs are underneath me. Odin decides it’s not good enough for me to sleep like that and takes my upper body in my arms, turning me so that he cradles my shoulders, and my hips drape down his side, legs bent on the couch. My head finds its place against his bicep and chest. I’m cocooned in his husky smell and strong body, and I couldn’t be safer.

He strokes my back, lulling me to sleep. I clutch onto the fabric of his white shirts as the boat rocks with the waves.

“Goodnight,” he murmurs against my forehead when I can’t keep my eyes open any longer.

“Wake me when we get there,” I demand weakly.

“Yes, ma’am.”

He does as I ask and tries to wake me. Unfortunately, I’m so exhausted, my eyes only flick open for a brief second before I want to sleep again. I mumble an apology, and Odin chuckles. He carries me to our destination, never letting me go. After stepping over the threshold, with my unconscious body in his arms, he wipes away the dirty makeup from my face and tucks me into bed, still in my wedding dress.

He kisses me goodnight again and I experience none of it.

But in my dreams, I see everything. A spectrum of colors that only exist because of him. Gold and red and pink and blue and green.

A rainbow.

Kacey Musgraves sits with me and we both smile.