Grace (The ‘Hello’ series)

12. Chapter 12

twelve

Grace

N othing can distract me as I keep going over what happened yesterday and whether I… wanted it. I never thought about it too much with Bash. It was always… just happening. I never felt anything when we were doing sexual stuff, never felt the lust and release others speak about.

But now… I truly can’t describe it, and that alone makes me wonder if I’m going insane as the feelings for Daniel build. Feelings I always believed I never had or was capable of. Perhaps Ashley was right. Bash just wasn’t pushing the right buttons.

Buttons I didn’t even know I had…

But it can’t be real. It’s impossible. There’s no way a man like Daniel said all that to me. There’s no way that he can feel so much for me or be so okay with my being turned on at the office.

It’s not something a girl like me does. My cheeks warm at the thought as Daniel’s two words filter through my mind.

Good girl.

My thighs tremble, tightening against each other.

I shouldn’t get all excited because of his praise. I shouldn’t have to run to the bathroom right after he touches me to cool down and take off my underwear because they’re so… wet.

Daniel thinks too highly of me.

I want to believe he’s testing me, but that bulge in his slacks says otherwise and I can’t…

I can’t get him out of my head.

Groaning, I rub my temples as a thought forms. Maybe I’m just this worked up because things ended with Bash and I’m experiencing lust for the first time in my life.

If that’s the case, then it’s not specific to Mr. Brooks. It doesn’t have to be, anyway. It could happen with anyone. And I can’t sleep with my boss, let alone my ex’s dad. So I won’t.

A bag drops onto the floor, and my eyes fling open, meeting Ashley’s.

“You need a night out,” she says as she tugs on her corset top.

“So badly,” I say, not even bothering to hide it.

“Put on a shirt that actually fits and I’ll show you where I work. Chop, chop, though. I only have a few minutes!” she orders.

A smile tugs on my lips, and I hurry up from the couch and go straight to my bedroom. I can never pull off fishnet stockings and a mini-skirt like Ashley does, but as I think of Daniel and his gentle touch, I grab a skirt that stops just above my knees and a simple top, one I always believed was a little too tight, but I want to step out of my comfortable shadow and try something different, just a little bit.

“Ready?” Ashley’s voice cuts through the air as I hear the front door opening.

“Coming!” I yell back, grabbing some mascara to put on in the car and hastening toward the front door.

A soft grin plays on Ashley’s lips as I step beside her.

“You look cute,” she says and locks the door behind us.

“I have one client, and then we can go out with the gang.”

My stomach twists and I clutch my hands together. “Great,” I say.

Ashley chuckles softly as she glides into her car and turns the ignition. “It can be if you let loose a little,” she teases.

I gape at her. “What? I can be fun!”

“Oh, I know you can. I’m sure of it.” She starts and drives off as I buckle my seatbelt. “Get out of your safe bubble and have fun tonight, Grace.”

I sigh. “I’m trying.”

I want to feel the same freedom Ashley feels, and perhaps it isn’t that no one notices me, it is that I keep myself hidden. I could be so much more… maybe… probably? Ashley’s already reminded me regularly to talk positively about myself. What if I had more reasons to do that? What if I could say I was proud of myself for going outside my comfort zone, that I liked myself for taking a risk, for moving forward in life and not letting my ex hold me back?

Then I’d have the confidence I see in other people. Then I’d be able to keep growing and pushing the way people like Ashley do. Hell, I liked Stacy, envied her confidence, her ability to stand up for herself, so much about her until I saw the dark side, so why do I have to stay exactly as I am?

“I know you’re trying,” she says, turning left. “So, tell me, what had you all worked up yesterday?”

My throat tightens and my cheeks heat. “Guess,” I dare.

“Your sexy boss-slash-ex-boyfriend’s dad?” she asks with a soft laugh. When my lips push into a hard line, her laughter builds. “Let me guess, you realized he’s hot for you too?”

“You can’t know that!”

She giggles. “No, you just seem like the oblivious type. I clearly need more information. Did he kiss you?”

“No.”

“Did he bang you on his desk without kissing you?” Ashley asks, then she shakes her head. “No, then you’d be flustered in a different way. You look like you’re desperate to get laid.”

“I’m not that kind of person!” I defend.

“Babe, we went over this. You don’t have to be a prude to be a good person. Whoever told you that lied to you.” She snorts. “Do what you want. Ignore what you ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t’ do unless it’ll get someone hurt.”

“It’s easy to say when you’re not the one involved,” I grumble.

“Yeah. It is. Which is why I’m the one saying it and you’re the one listening,” she says as if it’s obvious. “Anyway, if it’s just an older guy kink, we can definitely take care of that at the shop. My boss is sexy as sin, and I bet he’d love you to trace all of his tattoos with your fingers, your lips, or your tongue.”

“Ashley!” I yell, mortified.

She snickers as she parks at the back of a nice, modern building and shuts off the engine. “I’m just saying, if you want to know what gets you going, test it out.”

I’m at a loss for words, but she doesn’t wait and gets out of the car without looking back. I follow quickly and walk with her to the front where it’s all old-school neon and signage. The windows are surrounded by red neon, showing vintage posters of girls and guys covered in tattoos.

Ashley points at one. “That’s me, by the way. They have all the apprentices model their tattoos.”

She’s dressed like she belongs on some kind of pinup magazine, looking sexy and demure all at once. I let her take my hand and lead me in. The walls are covered in pieces of artwork, and the gray tile floor paired with the rest of the dark red and black furniture and paint make the place seem dangerous, yet homey in a way I didn’t expect.

“So this is Custom Ink,” Ashely says grandly.

“Ooh, we got virgin skin in the house!” a guy yells.

“Shut it, Marko. She’s my friend,” Ashley bites back.

“Maybe she wants to be my friend.” He grins as his eyes rake over my body.“Marko,” a rough voice vibrates through the shop. “Behave for once, will you?”

The man—the one who yelled at Marko—stands up from the left corner, into the light. His arms are covered in tattoos, curling under his shirt, and I’m sure there isn’t a place of empty skin on his big, gruff body. His piercings glint in the fluorescent light, and his gray hair is tied at the back of his neck in a small bun.

He snaps his gloves as he takes them off. He nods his head in my direction. “What’s this, Ash?”

“My roommate,” Ashley says, squeezing my hand. “What do you think, Ben?”

“You want a tattoo, honey?” he asks, looking me over slowly. “I’d be happy to put it on you myself, wherever you want.”

His dark eyes glint with excitement, but I don’t feel the same buzz from his gaze as it sweeps over me a second time. I clear my throat. “Maybe I could look at some options?”

I had no intention to get a tattoo, but maybe this is a first step into getting out of my safe bubble and embracing who I want to be until I become that person.

“You’ll have plenty of those. And I’m not shy. I can put a tattoo or piercing on you anywhere and make sure we both enjoy it,” he promises.

Ashley snorts. “Chill out with the flirting, man. You’re going to make her think our shops are scary,” Ashley snaps.

He rolls his eyes. “ You have an appointment in five. Go get ready.”

Ashley kisses my cheek and hurries away, leaving me with this huge man in front of me. He hands me a book. “These are tattoos I’d like to do. I tattoo a lot of women, and I know how to make it safe, comfortable, and to give you privacy.”

“That’s good to know,” I breathe.

I skim through the book and feel him getting closer, but he doesn’t invade my space. He flirts occasionally, telling me that flowers belong on hips after seeing just a sliver of mine when my shirt inched up. But it doesn’t have the same effect Daniel’s flirting or looks do.

There’s no heat threatening to drag me into a pool of lava. My legs aren’t threatening to give out.

Ben doesn’t make me uncomfortable, either. He’s not pushy. Every flirty line is like an offer that he’s waiting for me to grab. He does actually show me some good tattoos, listens to what I’m interested in, which is nice, and when I don’t respond to his flirting, he puts more space between us.

“You don’t have to make a choice on the spot, Grace. The last thing I want to do is cover up your first tattoo in a few years. It’s a forever decision and one you can take your time on,” he says gently.

Honestly, he should scare me, all buff, inked, and pierced, but there’s something so effortlessly warm and kind about him. I think he’d be a good big brother. I smile. “I’ll have to think more about it, but I’m sure Ashley won’t let me forget.”

He scoffs. “She won’t. She’s going to bug you about it constantly. You don’t have to be tattooed by her, though. You have options.”

“Options tend to be good,” I agree.

He looks me over again and smirks. “I’d offer to take you out for drinks so I can get to know you better, but I have a feeling you’re going to turn me down.”

I smile at him. “I would. I just got out of a relationship,” I say honestly. “And… I’m figuring things out.”

“Well, the best way to get over a relationship is to be with someone who actually makes you feel something.” Ben scratches the back of his head. “Trust me. I have plenty of experience in that department.”

“Thanks,” I say, then glance around. “Um, do I just sit here or…?”

“She’ll be done in an hour, and then we’ll go to the bar down the street. If you don’t want to come, I can give you a ride home. You ever been on a motorcycle?” he asks.

No. Because Sebastian always said they were death machines and before him, my parents told me that they’d rather I try skydiving than a motorcycle. Which suddenly makes this offer seem twice as tempting. If I’m curious, I should try it, right? It’s not permanent like a tattoo or that dangerous if I’m not the one driving.

I beam. “No, which is clearly something I will let you fix.”

He grins at me and leans back to grab something out of the dark wooden desk. My brows draw together as he lifts a bottle of whisky with two glasses.

“Don’t worry, I won’t drink when I know something so precious will be holding me tightly later tonight,” he taunts and pours me a glass.

A soft laugh falls from my lips as I take the glass. The scent burns my nose and I blink. Cautiously, I take a sip. The harsh taste glides over my tongue, and I quickly swallow.

Ben chuckles as he stares at me. “Not your kind of drink?”

I shrug. “I’m not even sure if I have a drink,” I joke, even though it’s the truth. I always behaved, never stepped out of line or did something I might regret. But that wasn’t a life. I kept myself in this box, this cage. And perhaps it isn’t so terrible to bang on the walls and stretch out a bit.

Perhaps it isn’t bad that I get to enjoy the high of trying something new, riding on the back of a motorcycle, flirting with men, and drinking with a tattooed man twice my age, dressed in leather. Perhaps Sebastian was right to break up with me. Hell, I should have done it months ago, a year ago! If being without him gives me this kind of freedom… well, I can’t wait to keep enjoying it, even in little ways.

After all, there are worse things than pushing some boundaries and blurring some lines. And I’m sure, without question, that there are worse things than having a crush on my boss, even if he’s my ex’s dad.