Heavy Petting

1. Garonn

1

GARONN

I wipe my sword clean and sheath it before entering the high commander’s quarters.

Hordan rises from his seat as I enter. Since his unmatched leadership duties are best served away from the brutal action, his grey pelt is much cleaner from the battle than my own, but he is not unscathed. He closes his eyes and scratches the base of his horns as if his head is hurting, and then he gives a weary rumble.

“The village is clear,” he says with surety, not needing to ask if it is so.

For my intuitively gifted friend, it’s more of a conversation starter than a question of confirmation, but I respond as if it is one. “The last of the Intolerables have been dispatched,” I confirm. “Those worthy of reform have been rounded up for re-education and will be transferred to Vlad’s district. The streets are being systematically searched for innocents, who will be gathered for welfare checks in the town center, as planned.”

He nods, looks me up and down, and gestures to the nearby bench. “See to your wounds, General Garonn.”

I take a seat on the nearby bench and run my healing wand over the deep cuts in my pelt. The pain will remain for a day or two, and the scars will linger for longer, but my skin is already knitting back together. I return my healing wand to its home, next to my sword, and pat the leather sheath fondly.

I will be ready for battle again in no time — ready to slay the rest of the cruel abusers of power in this human realm, who would inflict harm on their most vulnerable. They will rue their decisions if it’s the last thing I make them do.

“The war is over.” Hordan takes his hands from the illuminated orb on his desk and lets it dim.

“Oh.” I frown. “It is done?”

The battlefire leaves my veins in a rush, and I slump in my seat with the impact of the unexpected anti-climax. What am I meant to do now, then? Go home to the monster realm and wait in the dark for the next summons to restore balance in the universe? Seriously? “There’s nobody left to kill?”

“Don’t be too disappointed, Garonn.” He smiles kindly. “Your work here is not yet done. A fragile peace has returned to the human realm, but going forward, our duty is to oversee the rehabilitation of its inhabitants.”

I lean in, skeptical. “The captives have all been freed?”

Hordan nods again. “Reports have come in from all corners of the earth. You’re standing in the final village our kind will need to overtake. The last of the maltreated humans are also being liberated elsewhere as we speak. You will want to head down to the town center.” He says that last part with a curious smile as he hands me a small book bound with golden thread.

I take it from him and read the title, embossed in gold on the brown leather cover.

The Human-keeper’s Handbook.

Human-keeper? I lift my gaze to him. “What is this?”

“You became a guardian the moment you heeded the call and stepped into their realm,” he says. “The prayer was sent, and you responded. The innocents wished to be made safe and taken care of, and we volunteered to be of service. We may have slain their enemies, but our purpose is not yet complete.” He strokes his chin. “There is a grand estate awaiting you only a half-day’s carriage ride from here. It is set up with all you may require to care for a new human pet, should you rise to the duty of adopting and cherishing one of the oppressed, to create a loving new world for them to live in. Did you desire a hasty return to the realm of monsters, instead?”

I shudder as the thought of my dark homeland enters my mind, and I glance out the window at the beautiful bright sky with its glowing sun. I could stay here? In a grand house, designed especially for me and a new little friend? I have always lived alone, so I know what loneliness feels like. Is this a chance to learn of love and belonging? Family? I could open my doors to welcome a mistreated human or two, in need of help to recover their strength, but I have killed so many of their villainous counterparts. Would they praise me or be scared of me?

My heart beats a little faster, and I look down at the book in my lap. I run my fingers over the cover. Could I even take care of a human? I don’t know much about them, beyond how easy they are to maim. I swallow hard and wipe my brow. What if I accidentally hurt one of the good ones?

I clear my throat. “In truth, I had not thought much, beyond delivering justice to perpetrators of harm.”

Hordan leans back in his chair. He laces his fingers over his belly and hums softly before he nods. “We may have removed their oppressors, but the remaining humans have many needs, and they are too vulnerable for those needs to be left unattended. We must nurture them until they understand life can be good, and our lives will be better for doing so. It is beautiful here, and the beneficial cohabitation of our species has already begun in the villages we first freed. The universe has gifted us with each other, and together, we will thrive.”

He rises from his chair and gestures to the door. “Go forth and find a companion to care for, Garonn. The liberation has been a tedious and bloody affair, and it’s time for rest and recovery. As I understand it, a new pet can do wonders to heal the soul after such carnage. One caught my eye in the last village we sacked, and I’ll be heading back there to claim her, now that permission has been granted. Do enjoy yourself when you find one suitable for your needs.”

“My needs?” What does he mean?

One side of his mouth slowly curls in a wry smile. “Perhaps you should do some reading?” He tips his head toward the book in my hand. “It’ll help you figure out what kind of human you’d enjoy keeping. You may like a strong, outdoorsy male, a female who produces milk, or maybe you’d prefer to care for a breeding pair, so you can find joy when you play with any little ones who come along?” He shrugs. “The possibilities are endless, really, but you’ll know what’s right for you.”

I had no idea that a human could be such a useful pet. Milk? I love milk. I grip the book tightly and stand, eager to embark on this next quest in the human realm. “Will that be all, High Commander?”

His secretive smile blooms into a grin broad enough to reveal the pointed tips of his teeth. “I can see you’re anxious to begin your search for the perfect pet, Garonn. I’ll be seeing you around as a civilian from now on?”

“Just like old times,” I agree. “Best of luck with your new pet, Hordan.”

“And you,” he says, bowing slightly. “The universe appreciates your righteous service and wishes you well.”

I walk out into the street, where a few of the houses are still burning, and I head toward the central village square. I’m off to find a pet.

A human pet. One of the good ones.

After dispatching so many of the more aggressive and wicked little beasts, I’m more curious than ever to learn more about the runts, outcasts, and oppressed submissives I was transported here to protect. They must be very precious and special, for the universe to have summoned guardians from a realm beyond their own.

My people felt their heartache too strongly to ignore, and our intertwining paths have now been secured, with my kind taking on the role of their caretakers more permanently.

We have been mythical to them until this time. We have been the watchers in the shadows, protecting from afar through fear of what we may do should they step too far in the wrong direction. They call us monsters, and it is the only name we know ourselves by. We have instilled fear into human hearts for generations in an attempt to help them behave. Many chose not to, but they are gone now. Only the innocent remain, and we are to share one world in harmony.

What does this even mean? This is all so new to me. If there is a handbook, then surely other monsters have been given the opportunity to claim a pet. Why have I not heard of such a thing? Are they too busy with their human-keeping duties to share their tales? Is taking care of a pet such an intensive undertaking? What am I in for?

I open the front cover of The Human-keeper’s Handbook and read the introduction.

Your service in the preservation of humankind’s integrity has been recognized by the Infinite High Council, and you have been promoted to the status of Ultimate Guardian.

Congratulations, you have henceforth qualified for a soul companion.

You are now a MASTER.

In this rewarding new role, you will hold an honored position of power, trust, and responsibility. You are about to find out firsthand whom you have been fighting for and whom you will continue to protect, cherish, and provide for from this day onward.

It is time to find your new pet.

As foreign as the concept may seem, you will know your soul companion on sight and will intuitively know how best to care for them, to gain much happiness and fulfillment for you both.

It is a rare and wonderful bond between a monster and his human pet — one you will both come to treasure. It is an honest love, reciprocated.

Humans are delicate, social beings, who thrive on dutiful care and affection in a loving and stable home. They also delight in feeling useful, and in return for your firm but kind handling, they will offer you many years of pleasure, company, and loyal service.

For your human’s optimal happiness and reduced stress, it is wise to keep them occupied during their waking hours. Males are more sturdily built and can be trained to take on a light workload. Females can be more physically fragile, but they are just as easily trained for light duties, and many are also able to produce milk and young.

Please refer to the guidebook for key insights into providing a safe environment, adequate healthcare and nutrition, appropriate training and exercise, emotional support, and mental stimulation for your human.

Enjoy your new, special friend for who they are, and you will find the relationship incredibly satisfying.

Well, that all sounds delightful. A special friend that will leave me feeling loved and fulfilled?

Such a gift would never have come to me in the monster realm.

I scan the empty village streets, close the book, and pick up my pace. More than ready to find my human companion, I cannot get to the town square fast enough.

I am barely halfway there when a beautiful, bewitching song reaches my ears and leads me off course. The heavenly voice is coming from deep inside a large human residence. It’s not one I recall clearing in my eviction duties, but if there is someone left inside, they will be an innocent in need of protecting. I bang on the big, wooden door, but nobody comes to unlock it and let me in.

I press my ear to the wood, but I can no longer hear anyone singing. A silent human is not a good sign. Do they need my help? I toss the handbook aside, and rip the door from its hinges.