Heir of Stardust and Secrets (Mythic Spark #1)

5. Shattered Resolve

Chapter 5

Shattered Resolve

T he week slipped by faster than anticipated. Eithan and I spent as much time together as we could, but as his departure neared, his time became limited. There was a lot to do when leaving an entire life behind and starting anew. Especially when his entire family was going with him.

I would have offered to help, but ever since the announcement, Eithan’s parents had all but forbade him to see me. Which would have never worked as he would have threatened to walk away from the arrangement if they pushed too hard, and they knew it.

Eithan’s family had treated me like one of their own until they suspected we were intimate. They were traditional and vehemently against us having relations out of wedlock. Something to do with the forgotten gods of old. They hadn’t pressed the issue over the years because Eithan was male, meaning his virtue wasn’t as guarded as his sister’s. Female or not, I wasn’t highborn—or rather, hadn’t stayed that way. His family disapproved of me spreading my legs, but not because my virtue had any real value to them. And although we’d never confirmed their suspicions, they kept me away from their family, namely his sister—lest I taint her with my sacrilegious behavior.

Eithan and I had joked about it mercilessly when we were alone. We’d even used the apparent impious nature of our relationship to seduce one another.

One time after training, Eithan had approached me from behind. His warm breath tickled the side of my neck as he leaned in and whispered into my ear, “What do you think the gods of old would think of me doing this?” His teeth slowly scraped their way down my earlobe.

“Or this?” Roaming hands slipped beneath the band of my waistline, fingers tracing from one side to the other. I leaned back into him as he unfastened my pants. Still standing behind me, he slid a palm straight down my center.

“Perhaps,” he said teasingly, “they’ll smite us for this?” My breath caught as he slid his fingers into my depths.

This type of banter had become an instant aphrodisiac for both of us and always culminated in him burying himself to the hilt, sending ripples of release through us.

Afterward, we’d laugh that the gods hadn’t smote us. Maybe next time, we’d joke. And sometimes that next time became right then.

Surrounded by the tranquility of our meadow, I sifted through those memories and others while waiting for Eithan. It was his last day, and he was no doubt running late due to his family’s protestations to see me, but we both needed these final moments together before he left. Yes, we would write, but it would be a mere whisper of what we had.

I wondered if I’d ever get used to talking about him— us —in the past tense. How long would it take for me to get used to being in the woods alone, or for this ache in my chest to fade? Could I fulfill my promise to him? Would I ever be cherished, loved, by another man?

“I know that look,” Eithan said by way of greeting. “I thought we agreed, no brooding.” His smile was full of levity, and although every part of me risked fracturing, I met him with a bright smile of my own.

“It’s annoyance at your sorry ass being late,” I retorted, then rose and leaned in for a hug.

Today would be a delicate balance of soaking in every minute with each other while maintaining an illusion of normalcy. We were down to our lasts. One last picnic. One last dip in the lake. One last hug.

Eithan collected my bag, and we began our ascent.

As we reached the lakeshore, Eithan set down my pack, opening it for the picnic blanket. “What’s this?” he asked, holding up a wrapped package from the bottom of my rucksack.

“What does it look like?” I teased.

“Butcher paper,” he said with a tug of a smile.

“Funny.” He was right—technically, I had wrapped it in butcher paper. I couldn’t get my hands on anything else and knew he wouldn’t care.

“Open it,” I said.

All amusement left him as he laid out the blanket, and we lowered ourselves onto it before he opened it. Concealed within the brown parchment was a medium-size notebook bound in leather. His name was inscribed on the cover in a delicate cursive. He caressed the buttery smoothness of the leather, then traced his name tenderly with his fingertips, repeating the movement several times.

Opening the book, he halted when he came across my script, then proceeded to read it aloud:

Many moons have come and gone as you’ve become a man.

The tide has changed, swift and fast, birthing a new plan.

But when you’ve journeyed and find yourself in a strange new land,

know that life will wax and wane, as the stars have planned .

Remember then, there’s more than night, when you feel the dark.

Just stay true to who you are, and a new day will embark.

He kept his head down, reading it silently for a time, then swallowed hard. “Thank you, Ny.”

“You’re welcome.” I paused, struggling against the words that pushed to the surface. I had to let him know, let him hear it from my own lips, even if I had never voiced it before. I was a coward for not saying it.

I rallied my courage.

“Eithan…I…”

Damn it, it felt like an immovable boulder held the words at bay. Why were my feelings so hard to express?

Eithan’s gaze lingered on me, waiting.

My heart pounded against my chest like a drum of anxiety and fear. “I...” Fuck. Why can’t I say it?

He caressed my cheek with his hand. “I know, Ny. I know.”

Those broken words shattered my resolve. I couldn’t just sit in this sadness—the loneliness that waited for his absence to pounce.

My mouth found his as I swung a leg across his lap, straddling him. Instantly, he wrapped his hands around my waist, holding me as if afraid of letting go.

We were a frenzy of teeth and tongues and heavy breaths.

He paused, breaking away, then held my face in his hands—his steady, gentle, calloused hands. Thumbs gliding across my cheeks with loving tenderness, Eithan studied me as if etching every detail into memory.

I did the same. His eyes. His lips. His hair. His warmth beneath me. The patterning of his light freckles. All of him.

He kissed me long and deep, then drew back a fraction, eyes searching, questioning: Are you sure?

Holding his gaze, I raised my arms in answer .

A familiar, promising grin washed away any uncertainty, and he freed me of my shirt, tossing it aside.

He held me in place as he kissed my chest, then licked his way up to the base of my throat. A shaky breath filled my lungs. I wanted him, now. But I let him play and taste and grab and bite to his heart’s content—my body was his canvas to immortalize as he saw fit.

Still on his lap, I slipped off my brassiere and leaned back, giving him greater access. His hands took full advantage, skittering up my sides and finding their quarry as my bare flesh filled his firm grasp. He leaned in and sucked a breast into his mouth, and I braced myself, letting the slick, tantalizing sensation roll through my body. A guttural moan escaped me as his teeth danced across my nipple.

In one swift movement, Eithan flipped our positions.

He towered over me, and the ravenous look in his eyes sent a fresh wave of heat through my core. His weight pressed against me as he stole a kiss, and I could feel his firm length at the ready. Stars, how I wished there was no fabric between us.

Eithan made his way down, down, down, and finally released me from my remaining garments. He knelt between my legs, pausing for a moment to take all of me in; then he lowered himself.

I throbbed in anticipation.

He licked straight up my core, firmly sucking in the bundle of nerves at my apex. My head tilted back with a gasp, hips rising as my hands clasped the blanket at my sides hard enough that I grabbed a handful of pebbles through the fabric.

“Oh gods . ” I was sure I only thought the words, but Eithan’s rumbled laugh had me digging my heels into the beach.

Sweat dappled my brow as blissful tension waxed, and just as I was on the cusp, Eithan slid two fingers in and pumped with precision, shattering me completely.

Breathing heavily, I was satisfied—and rapacious for more.

Eithan flipped me over, and I lifted my hips toward him, bracing the heels of my palms against the ground hard enough that the rocks below cut into my flesh .

The tip of him grazed my entrance. Heart pounding, I held my breath. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Gods, the wai—Eithan plunged himself in fully, pulling a gasp from me as I jolted forward, then rebalanced as the torrid pleasure flitted through every facet of my body.

All tenderness was gone as he fervently worked to pleasure both of us, and with a slight tilt of my hips, he did just that. Within moments, our sounds of release echoed across the lake until they were swallowed by the woods.

We stayed there for a time until Eithan withdrew himself and we collapsed next to one another, still reeling from the primal satisfaction coursing through our veins.

Once recovered, we indulged in another goodbye before washing off one last time, then made our way back down the mountain.

Our final farewell was a silent affair as we stood at the cabin’s timber line. Eithan cradled me in his safety for longer than he had to spare. My hands clutched his garments hard enough that the painful tingle in my fingers had long since been replaced by a cold numbness.

His grip slowly loosened, and my body went rigid in response.

Tiny fissures cracked in my heart with each fraction of space that grew between us, and I had to tamp down the urge to grab at him, to stop him from letting me go, to beg him to stay.

His lips pressed against my forehead, and I savored the last time I would receive him in that way. A rogue tear slid down my cheek, and he caressed it away as he gave me the familiar half-smile I’d witnessed a million times before. Then the softness of his lips brushed mine.

Wordlessly, Eithan turned away, and I watched as he was swallowed by the shadowed forest until all traces of him were gone.

I stared out in that direction long after he’d vanished, trying to settle into the strange new feelings that flooded me.

Stumbling, my back found support against a tree, and I sank to the ground as the bark snagged on my jacket. One at a time, I pulled my knees into my chest, curled my arms around them, and let my head droop.

Tears accumulated on the ground below as I reminded myself to breathe. Just breathe.