His Tiny Sun

Chapter 28 - What Eric Wants

CHAPTER 28

What Eric Wants

Letting Eric take the lead had been a bad idea. Alan should have known. Actually, he knew he would regret it. But the smile on Eric’s face when he suggested taking self-defense classes together had prevented Alan’s brain from thinking clearly. And now it was too late.

“What’s your name?” the teacher asked, his piercing gaze boring into the deepest depths of Alan’s soul.

“Alan Thomas sir, uh, Sensei.”

“Thomas. Did you believe you were signing up for a book club?”

Huh?

“I—I don’t understand,” Alan said.

“Does this look like a library?”

Alan struggled to hold the man’s gaze as he tried to understand what he was confronting him about. Although he was slightly shorter than Alan, he was downright frightening, which seemed to defeat the purpose of taking such a class.

Perhaps the teacher’s tactic was to bully his students into desensitizing them to bullying, but Alan was living proof that it wasn’t an effective approach. “Uh, n-no, Sensei.”

“Then why can’t I hear you?”

Oh.

“Do it again,” the Sensei ordered, standing firmly in place to watch Alan.

Alan’s anxiety shot through the roof; he hated being loud. It felt extremely uncomfortable. He’d been hoping the teacher wouldn’t notice that he wasn’t shouting like the others. Alan should have known that a man with such a piercing gaze would swiftly detect when one of his students wasn’t doing exactly what he’d instructed them to.

Alan punched the air again, trying to shout, but only managed an embarrassing squeak.

“Louder.”

Alan swallowed around the lump in his throat. He didn’t like this at all, but Eric was obviously enjoying himself. He couldn’t just give up. So he punched the air like everyone else in the room. Again and again and again, under the intimidating stare of their Sensei.

“Louder.”

Alan raised the volume of his voice far beyond what felt right, but his punches were sloppy, his arm starting to feel sore from the repeated movement. Why couldn’t he ever do anything right?

“Louder.”

He was failing. On his very first day. Like the useless weakling he was.

“Louder.”

He was crying now. Like a big baby. How pathetic was he?

“Louder.”

What would Jonah think? Surely, he’d grow tired of his weak ass at one point. What did Alan even have to offer?

“Louder.”

It was no wonder that Jonah hadn’t even noticed him at the café, while Alan had been drooling over him like a creep for weeks.

“Louder.”

Too scared to even talk to him. Because Alan knew he wasn’t good enough—how could he compete with someone like Eric?

“Louder.”

Jonah deserved someone better. Someone stronger. Someone hotter.

“Louder.”

Something burst inside Alan, filling him with deep rage as he gave the man a teary-eyed glare. Alan firmly held his stare as he punched the air once more, this time shouting at the top of his lungs. He did it again, and again, and again. Shouting, screaming, growling. Louder, louder, louder.

The man wanted to humiliate him? Fine. Then so be it. Who cared? Alan was never setting foot into this place again. He’d never see these people again. Screw Eric. He didn’t even ask for Alan’s opinion before signing them up for this class. He always thought of himself first, like the selfish meanie he was. So fixated on his own person, he didn’t even notice when—

“Excellent. Keep it up,” their Sensei said, before walking to the next person in line and asking for their name.

Alan panted, his upper body heavy with burning muscles, and his cheeks wet with tears, but a strange feeling swirled in his chest. He looked at Eric, who was giving him two enthusiastic thumbs up with a big grin. “That was awesome,” he mouthed silently, before resuming his own loud routine.

An unexpected smile grew on Alan’s lips as he wiped his cheeks with his sleeve. Once the dam had burst, it felt good to let it all out. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all. Maybe Eric had been right to choose this place.

“Same time next week,” their Sensei shouted suddenly, addressing the entire class. “Take a shower before you leave; nobody wants to smell your stinky asses.”

Alan discreetly sniffed his armpit. He didn’t seem to stink, but he would definitely be taking a shower anyway, if only to hide from the rest of the world for a few minutes.

The website had stated that they were providing everything they needed: towels, soap, and shampoo. Alan had brought his own anyway, suspecting the products would be cheap and smell awful, but he found out that he’d been mistaken.

Showering with the offered soap felt like taking some kind of citrusy hike in the rainforest. Not that Alan had ever set foot in the actual rainforest, but he could dream.

Alan would have liked to stay under the warm water forever, but there were only three showers for the whole group, so he regrettably had to make it quick for those who, unlike him, actually had things to attend to.

The burning sensation in his muscles intensified as he stepped out of the shower. His uncooperative arms felt like squishy blocks of cement as he dried himself with the provided towel, and getting dressed turned out to be an embarrassingly difficult chore.

Eric was kind enough not to tease him.

They shoved their uniforms into their bags and made their way out, Eric waving happily at their Sensei, who gave him the slightest of nods. Alan still found the man terrifying, but he decided to give his classes a few more tries. If anything, Alan might at least learn to stop crying at the first sign of confrontation.

“You didn’t tell me he was gonna pick you up,” Eric grumbled.

Alan looked up from his feet, his already palpitating heart doing a little backflip when he saw Jonah in the parking lot, leaning against his car and giving him one of those smiles he reserved just for him. “I didn’t know he would,” Alan said, toning down the excitement in his voice.

Although Eric and Jonah weren’t openly hostile toward each other anymore, they also weren’t exactly on the best of terms. Eric was obviously still embarrassed about calling Jonah the other day, when Alan had refused to punch him in the face. As for Jonah, well, Alan suspected he was only making an effort to tolerate Eric for his sake.

“So?” Jonah asked as they got closer. His car was parked right next to Eric’s, and Alan couldn’t help wondering if he’d done it on purpose—with those two, one never knew. “How was it?”

“It was—”

“— Awesome !” Eric exclaimed.

Alan gave Jonah a strained smile. It wasn’t exactly what he was going to say, but he would be damned if he ruined Eric’s enthusiasm. It had been a rough week for Eric so far. His decision to stop dating was weighing on him. He was so miserable, it was almost like he was suffering from withdrawal symptoms.

“It was fun,” Alan said.

Eric got into position just like they’d been taught and aimed a punch at Jonah’s face, stopping right before the impact. To Alan’s astonishment, Jonah didn’t react. Not even a tiny flinch.

Considering the kind of punches Jonah could give when he was provoked, Alan nearly collapsed from relief at his show of restraint.

Eric huffed. “You have shitty reflexes.”

Alan had evidence of the opposite.

Jonah gave him an unimpressed look. “It was obvious from your shitty posture that you wouldn’t land it.”

Oh, no.

Eric tried to mirror Jonah’s detached demeanor, but there were unmistakable sparks of electricity in his eyes. “Say what you want. Sensei Gruger told me my posture was impeccable.”

It wasn’t exactly the word their Sensei had used, but Alan would be keeping that specification to himself.

Jonah’s eyes widened suddenly, his body tensing like he’d just heard shocking news. Eric held his head up with visible pride at his reaction, which Alan doubted had anything to do with his prowess.

Does he know him?

If he did, then it was possible Jonah knew about the man’s aggressive teaching methods. Jonah could be quite protective when it came to Alan. He hoped Jonah wouldn’t end up punching his Sensei, too.

“Anyway,” Eric said as he took out his phone. Alan knew that move: it was Eric’s way of concluding an exchange while he was ahead. “Guess I’ll leave you two to it.”

“Actually, I was just passing by—”

“ Hey !” Eric exclaimed. “Flavien is inviting us to his parents’ beach house.”

“On Saturday?” Jonah asked.

“Yeah. Why?” Eric said with narrowed eyes.

Jonah crossed his arms. “The manipulative bastard didn’t even bother sending me an invitation; he just straight up told Isabel and Sean I was going.”

Alan’s eyes widened. “Really?”

“Well, he invited us directly,” Eric said, before looking at Alan. “He wants to meet you and Marina.”

Alan did his best not to grimace as he held Eric’s excited gaze. “He already met me.”

“It doesn’t count.”

Alan looked at Jonah. “Are you going?”

“I wasn’t planning to.”

“Come on, It’ll be fun!” Eric said, looking at Alan with pleading eyes. “When was the last time we went to the beach?”

“We could always go to a public beach,” Alan offered.

Eric sneered. “Public beaches are crowded and disgusting. Besides, Flavien is an incredible host. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Alan sighed internally. He could never refuse Eric anything, especially not when he was this enthusiastic. “Alright.”

“Yeah!” Eric exclaimed, putting his hand in the air for a high five, which Alan gave with subdued enthusiasm—in large part because his arm still felt like a squishy block of cement.

“Hm. Guess I’ll go, then,” Jonah said.

Eric gave him a haughty look. “Why? Feeling left out?”

Oh, no.

Jonah huffed. “Flavien invited me first.”

Oh, no.

“He didn’t even invite you,” Eric retorted. “He invited your friends.”

Oh, no.

“To pressure me into going because he’s desperate to have me there.”

“I’m starving,” Alan said, reaching for Eric’s wrist. “Do you want to order pizza?”

“Yeah. Good idea. I’ll be in my car.”

Alan’s sore shoulder relaxed. It had been a close call.

As much as Alan wanted Jonah to be there on Saturday, it didn’t seem like such a good idea anymore. He doubted those two could spend more than twenty minutes without poking at the other’s ego. “You sure you want to go?” Alan asked Jonah. “I’ll be okay.”

Jonah wrapped his arm around Alan’s waist and pulled him close. “Yeah. With Sean and Isabel there, it should be bearable.”

Alan pouted. “And me?”

“Stop that,” Jonah said as he lifted the corner of Alan’s mouth with his thumb. “You know I always enjoy your company.”

Alan smiled. “I know.”

Jonah let go of his face and gave him a kiss. “Call you later?”

Alan nodded. “I have a lot to tell you.”