Ho Ho Homicidal Maniac (Murder and Mistletoe #2)

Chapter 4

Nico

From what I’ve researched about Blake, he’s ridiculously rich, his only surviving relative is his brother, and he’s been homeschooled. No wonder I wasn’t able to find out that it’s him who is Cryptic Boy Wonder, since there is no tie to his real identity.

It’s still very early, before the midday and afternoon rush hour, and there’s just a single pair of customers at the store. They’re torn between two Christmas Village collections, and since gathering all the elements is going to take them several years, it’s not a decision to be rushed. I remind them that I’m here to help and walk off to replenish the impulse buys on shelves closest to the counter. But as I stack small, imported gingerbread men encased in colorful foil, my gaze wanders to the collection of fancy gifts that so often gets emptied just before Christmas day, when forgetful people remember to buy presents for more or less distant relatives.

One of the snow globes showcased in the cabinet depicts Santa’s elves frolicking in the snow, and one of them, young, handsome, and rosy-cheeked, brings to mind my new acquaintance. He’s as trapped under the glass as Blake is in my basement.

“You’ve been staring at that snow globe for half an hour. Everything okay?” Owen, my employee, asks.

It pulls me out of my thoughts about Blake and his tight green shorts.

“What can I say? I’m partial to a cute elf twink,” I joke, even though I’ve got serious matters on my mind. A part of me would love to keep Blake forever, create a nice little apartment for him down there, so that we can live in our own bubble where Christmas lasts all year long. We could make toys and decorations together, watch holiday movies, and have special ‘Christmas’ days once a month, then restart the countdown and do it all over again.

I know it’s a little Groundhog’s Day, but who wouldn’t enjoy some seasonal magic?

“You seem awfully interested in this elf today. Does he remind you of someone?” Owen flashes me a bright smile. He’s been like this since he started seeing a boy from his community college last year, and while I appreciate his concern, at times I almost miss the disaster gay he used to be before Adam tamed him.

But hey, I’ve seen this guy go through the highs and lows of his life, and he’s like family to me. As entertaining as his past self was, he seems much happier now. Could that be me by next Christmas?

“There is this guy…” I sigh, because deep down, I know my situationship with Blake is fucked up. I’m losing my mind a little already, but it’s partially because he’s seen the real me, and I’ve never had that with a guy. Even Owen, who used to live in my spare room, and who used to spend every holiday with me before Adam’s family pretty much adopted him, doesn’t know the true me. As long as I don’t let Blake go, I can imagine that he wouldn’t go to the cops, and that he likes me.

But my reasons not to release him aren’t entirely selfish. I found out from his abductor’s phone that someone wants Blake gone, but when I tried calling the bastard’s number, the line was dead. Danger is still somewhere out there, and freeing Blake would be like letting a prized turkey roam freely in a forest filled with foxes.

Owen’s brown eyes dart toward the couple who can’t decide between the 1950s Christmas Village and the 1890s Christmas Village, but he then rests his elbows on the counter and leans on it so hard I can swear his feet left the floor. He’s grinning at me as if he’s Krampus’s little helper. “Do I know him?”

I pick up the snow globe and shake it, thinking back to the one I’m currently working on in my underground workshop. Maybe I should add an elf inside there?

“Nah, he’s new in town. I don’t even know how long he’ll be staying, but… I just really like him, you know? Sometimes you just meet a person, and the two of you click.” I smile at the memory of how Blake’s gun had ‘clicked’ and then didn’t fire. Wasn’t that destiny at work? He could have killed me in that moment, but the universe had other plans for us.

Owen takes a deep, exaggerated breath. “Tell me more. What does he look like? Is he visiting family? Did you two hook up?”

I cover my face for a second, embarrassed that I’m even having this problem. But despite being twenty-seven, I’ve been either living and breathing all the work at the Winter Emporium, or spending endless hours researching my future victims. I’m one of those people who can sleep four hours a day and be fine, but I still barely have any time left to date. The last time I hooked up was months ago, and the guy didn’t seem impressed by my attic apartment. And what’s so strange about festive bedding? It was a classy set too, with pine trees.

“Oh, Owen… he’s so hot. Green eyes, short dark curls, lashes for days. Freckles, long legs, toned arms, and a mouth you just wanna kiss for hours. He’s on the young side, and I think I might intimidate him a little. I don’t know how much time we’ll have, it’s all up in the air.”

“But he’s legal and gay? You think he likes you?” Owen asks, lowering his voice.

I’ve seen his ID, so I know he’s twenty-one. Clearly not too young to almost fall victim to a violent murderer. He’s so lucky I happened to be there.

I groan. “I’m not a cradle-snatcher. And I swear the spark is there. I wore a shirt to see him yesterday, and he was staring at my forearms much longer than necessary. If he just let me, I’d keep him in my bed for a week.” Though I’d have to settle for the one in the basement for now.

Owen’s teeth dig into his lower lip. “Maybe that’s what you should do? When’s the last time you took any time off? You know I’m only leaving to visit Adam’s family on the day before Christmas Eve. I could cover the shop until then.”

I look at the shelves stacked with all types of trinkets, the table set up by the window to showcase our selection of dinnerware, and the glass cabinet filled with festive jewelry. How could I possibly leave him to deal with it all? We do have two more members of staff throughout December, but they work part-time .

“I took some time last year,” I say hesitantly.

“You took one day, Nico.”

And that was enough to deal with the man I killed for Christmas last year. I had to travel across the state lines for that one. Risky, but when I found out he robbed houses of those who left for the holidays, I was enraged. Imagine coming back from a lovely time with friends and family only to find your home ruined. At one of the places he broke into, Edgar murdered a housekeeper, and that sealed his fate.

I shake my head. “Maybe I should just let this pipe dream go. Do I really have the time to date? In December ?”

Owen cocks his head and clicks his tongue before adjusting the collar of the shirt I’m wearing under the sweater. “That is literally your favorite time of the year. When, if not in December, when everyone’s mushy from the magic of Christmas, hm? Do you really want to be alone this festive season?”

Ah, it’s so typical that once slutty people couple up and settle down, they think that’s what everyone needs to achieve perfect happiness.

But then again, I have been lonely in my bed for so long.

“What if he thinks it’s weird how into Christmas I am?” I grumble, putting away the globe.

“Come on, Nico, you’ve got your looks to fall back on. I know! You could take him to the Christmas market!” Owen gets so excited he grabs one of the red bells off the counter and jingles it. “Mulled wine to get in the mood, and fa la la la la, la la la la !”

I have to smile at that, because the vision is oh so blissful. Me and Blake, at the market, snow falling, lights twinkling, cups filled with hot chocolate, and our mitten-clad hands entwined as we shop for handmade gifts.

“I guess I won’t know if I don’t try, right…? ”

Owen makes a fist-pump, and then lightly punches my chest. “That’s the Christmas spirit! Set up a nice date, show him what you’re good at. I know you have enough charm to make magic happen.”

“Excuse me,” the elderly woman calls out, waving at us. “Could you explain the materials used once again?”

At this rate, they’re gonna be here until lunchtime.

Owen winks at me before heading off toward the pair, smile number five in place, and I exhale, glancing back at the snow globe and the young elf that reminds me of Hot Blake, who waits for me in the cellar.

Ah, if only things were as easy as Owen paints them.

‘ Show him what you’re good at ’ bounces around in my mind, because, yeah, I’m already planning our date. I want him to get to know me, to see I’m more than just the Christmas Killer. And since he’s so keen on true-crime stories, I’m sure he’d appreciate a glimpse behind the curtain. Wouldn’t he like to know what I do with my murder souvenirs?

One step at a time, Nico.

First a nice dinner, then the snow globe filled with teeth shavings.