Holiday Cheer from Andrew Grey and Amy Lane

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

“DID YOU forget what time it is here… again?” my friend Julie asked as she answered her phone.

I checked the clock and groaned. “Sorry. I’ll let you go back to sleep.”

“I just went to bed and wasn’t asleep yet, so I’ll let you keep your head… for now. What’s up?” I heard her yawn and another apology was on the tip of my tongue, but I stopped it. It would only get her going again.

“I think I’m being dumb. I went to lunch with a sort of coworker yesterday, and I think he was flirting with me. We got through the whole gay thing, so I know he is. That isn’t an issue, but what do I do if he is?”

“Flirt back?” she quipped. “Enjoy it. Hey, try finding out if he’s interested and hump his bones. Hell, why are you asking me? It’s been a year since I’ve gotten any action. That bastard took everything in the divorce, including my ability to stand the sight of men. You’re an exception, of course, unless you keep calling me at this ungodly hour.” I heard her huff. “Seriously, though, you may be misunderstanding him. It could be that he’s just being nice.”

“Okay. So what do I do?”

“Men are clueless.” I heard her transcontinental sigh. “Ask him.”

“Yeah, right. What do I say? ‘Yesterday at lunch I thought you might be flirting with me. I was just wondering if you were?’”

“You could. Or if you’re interested, you could just flirt back. If he continues, then reel him in. Why is it I have to give you advice on men? You are one, you date them—that should make you an expert. Lord knows there’s been no hitch in my giddyap in a while.”

“I take it you’ve been up watching old movies again.”

“Yeah. I definitely need to get laid. But I can’t figure out how to do that without actually spending time with men.” Julie seemed to have gotten stuck in the men-are-pigs, post-breakup stage. I was smart enough not to mention she could find a woman. The last time I had, the screeching commenced and didn’t cease for an hour. Apparently I’d hit a nerve, and she nearly worked my last one by the time we were done.

“Okay. Go out, find a man, take him home, fuck his brains out, and kick him to the curb in the morning. You’ll feel better, he’ll have gotten sex… win-win.”

“Oh, you’re no help,” Julie said, and I walked into the bathroom to start cleaning up. I put the phone on speaker and quietly opened my kit.

“Sorry.”

“Yeah… well. So what’s this guy’s name?”

“Georg von Mittelbach. He’s one of the project managers. Tall, dark hair, gorgeous eyes. Oh, and dimples. When he smiles he has these Mario Lopez dimples that are hot as hell. He could step out of a magazine, if you know what I mean.”

I could almost hear her smile through the phone. “When do you see him again? Is this some water cooler fascination?”

I rolled my eyes, forgetting for a second she couldn’t see me. Next time we’d have to FaceTime. “In a few hours. He’s showing me around today.” I tried to sound cool, but failed miserably when my voice cracked a little. Damn, I hated when that happened. I wasn’t a teenager, but fuck if it still didn’t crack when I was nervous.

“Then have fun and see what happens. Above all, enjoy yourself. That’s why you took that assignment. It was a chance to get away and get over the asshole. If you meet a handsome, dashing man, all the better.”

“Thanks. You’ve been a big help.”

“Next time call during normal business hours and I’ll be more on my game.” She paused. “Have fun, and I love you to pieces, you know that. Don’t let that crap with Jay and the baggage from your family stop you from having fun. You have a chance to be the person you want to be, so go for it.” She hung up, and I closed the app on my smartphone.

Julie was right. All the crap that had gone down in the past few years didn’t mean anything. I was in a brand-new place and no one knew me. I could just be me without carrying all that junk along for the ride. I finished getting cleaned up and dressed and was waiting in the lobby of the small hotel when Georg strode in. He smiled when he saw me, and I stood and approached him.

“Are you ready to go?” Georg asked.

“Sure. What did you have in mind for today?” I was anxiously excited about spending time with Georg, hoping he’d like me and I didn’t say something stupid.

“I thought we’d drive out to Füssen and visit the castles. It’s not too far and there are great views of the Alps from there.” Georg smiled. “It’s touristy, as you could imagine, but it is fun, and some places are touristy for a reason. After that we can play it by ear if you like.”

“I’m in your hands,” I said without thinking.

Georg paused at the front door of the hotel. “I think I like that.”

Did he mean what I thought he meant? I pushed the idea way. It didn’t matter, because I like that he liked that. “I’m glad,” I said catching Georg’s gaze for a second as we walked to his car. We climbed in, and Georg pulled out of his parking space and wound through town until we reached the autobahn.

“How did you get into this line of work?” Georg asked as the car got up to nearly incredible speed.

“I loved Star Trek and science fiction as a kid, so when I decided to become an engineer, I wanted to design things that went into space. I got my PhD a few years ago and I was on the ground floor of this project, so I was asked to design components and sort of fell into designing the mirror. I have experience with optics, as well, so things fell into place.”

“Is this the first big project you’ve worked on?”

“No. I worked on some satellites and things.” I couldn’t say any more about them, which was a real shame because they had been an incredible challenge. Those projects were where I had gotten my experience with optics.

“So you’re a doctor?”

“Officially, though I never use it outside of an academic setting.”

Georg chuckled. “Here it would be used all the time. Germans are really big on official titles, and if we go through all the work to get a doctorate, we seem to want everyone to know it.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that, I guess. I know people who use it all the time. The degree allows me to do what I really love. That’s why I got it, not because I want to rub a title in anyone’s face.”

I looked out the window as the rather bleak landscape passed. I could imagine how gorgeous everything would be with the hills and valleys covered in green. “Will it snow soon?”

“Up in the mountains it already has. The scenery should be impressive at the castle.” Georg looked over with another of his smiles.

“You seem excited. Have you been here before?”

“Yes.” Georg chuckled. “I think it’s your excitement I’m picking up on. I grew up here and I’ve seen this view more times that I can count. My father used to take me up in the mountains on our land to hunt when I was a child.” Georg got off the highway and onto a smaller road, headed toward the mountains in the distance. “I know this entire area like the back of my hand, but with you I’m seeing it with fresh eyes.”

“It’s beautiful,” I said and continued watching as the landscape changed.

“It’s in my blood. This land, these mountains, they’re a part of me.” Georg sighed. “I’ve traveled and worked in other places, but this part of the world always calls me home.” We turned a corner and the valley spread out beneath us. Georg pointed forward. “Look straight ahead. You can see the castle perched on the top of one of the peaks. That’s where we’re going—the white against the dark hills.”

“Wow,” I breathed and watched as the castle got closer and closer. It disappeared from view for a while as we wound around and eventually ended up in a small town. Georg parked, and we got out of the car.

I wasn’t sure where to look first. In one direction was a golden castle on a hilltop, and in another was Neuschwanstein, towering above us.

“This is Füssen,” Georg said. “The castle over there is Hohenschwangau, where Ludwig grew up and, of course, Neuschwanstein, the fairy-tale one he built. You’ll need to bundle up and we can get our tickets. Then we climb up to the castle.”

“We walk?”

“Yes,” Georg said with a smile. “It’s beautiful.”

I had to agree with him. Since Georg had bought lunch the day before, and drove, I got our tickets, and we walked through town and then began the climb up the hill. The sun was bright and the air crisp, and the hill wasn’t too steep. A few carriages came up behind us.

“We could have taken one of those,” Georg said, but I shook my head. The view was spectacular everywhere I looked, and as we rounded a bend, the white stone castle loomed overhead. I wouldn’t have traded that sight for anything.

“Jesus, it looks like something from Disney.”

“They used this castle as the model,” Georg said. I could see that, and we continued on our way, rounding the final bend and then entering the gates to the castle courtyard. We got in line for an English tour and waited ten minutes. We were shown inside and given a tour of palatial rooms with lavish decoration that looked more like theater sets than interior design. By the time the tour was over, my head was spinning. We stepped outside into a now cloudy day. The temperature had dropped as well.

“Do you want to get some pictures?” Georg asked.

I had taken a number of them inside with my phone.

“Sit on the wall and I’ll take your picture.”

I did, and Georg snapped a few.

“Would you like me to take one of both of you?” a lady asked as she walked past.

Georg handed her the phone, and we stood next to one another. After a few seconds, Georg put his arm lightly around my waist, and I moved closer to him. Smiling, we waited while she took our picture. After thanking her, we started the walk down the hill.

The wind picked up and flakes of snow began to fall. It was gorgeous and cold and wonderfully Christmassy all at once. Unfortunately as we got farther and farther down the hill, the cold began to win. I shoved my hands in my pockets and wished I’d worn another layer of clothing.

“Here.” Georg pulled a light scarf out of his pocket and wrapped it around my neck. “It will keep you warm.”

I pulled my hands out of my pockets to wrap the scarf, and Georg took one of them once I was done and threaded his fingers with mine.

“I guess I got my answer,” I said.

“To what?” Georg asked, turned to look at me.

“I was wondering if you were flirting with me or if you were just acting extra nice.” I moved closer, and Georg wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

“I was definitely flirting. Are you warmer now?”

I nodded, and we continued our downward trek. Thankfully the trip back to town took much less time than the trip up. We stopped in a couple of shops and I got a few ornaments. I didn’t expect to use them this year, but I’d have them for next year. I looked at a few sweatshirts as a souvenir, but decided against them. “Is it time for lunch?” I asked after we’d left the shop and started walking through the town. I had lost all track of time and didn’t care in the least.

“If you can wait, I thought we would go back to Munich and have lunch in the market.” That sounded good to me, so we got in the car and Georg drove back to the city. I spent much of the time watching the scenery.

“Do you live in Munich?” I asked, turning back as the mountains receded in the distance.

“Yes. My family has a house there. It’s been with us for generations.” Georg seemed uncomfortable. “I inherited it from my grandfather.”

“It must be very nice to have something like that. It means you have roots and a history.” I had none of those things. My life often felt transient. I’d lived in multiple places: Dallas, where I grew up, Chicago for a while, and now Boston. “I like to think that wherever I hang my hat is home, but that sounds kind of dumb. I don’t have a home. Not like that, anyway. I live in a small apartment near the university. It’s one step up from student housing.”

“Is that where you lived with… what’s his name?” I loved how Georg refused to say Jay’s name. It made me smile. Personally I didn’t want to think about him. Not right now.

“No. I had to move. We had a place together, but neither of us could afford it alone.” I sighed and wished I’d stop doing that. “It was for the best. I didn’t want reminders of him around, anyway.” Also since I was going to be gone for weeks, it didn’t make sense to get a huge place if I wasn’t going to be there a lot. “It’s just a place.”

Georg reached over and placed his hand on my leg. Warmth spread from his touch and radiated outward, warming my entire body. I tried not to shift too much, but I needed to make sure my cock wasn’t poking straight out for Georg to see. My heart raced, and I turned to look at him as he drove. Could he feel the effect he was having on me? I hoped he could, and at the same time I hoped he couldn’t. It was nice having someone interested in me, but getting involved with someone I worked with wasn’t a good idea, even if we didn’t have the same employer. I closed my eyes and willed my heart and dick to settle down. Neither listened.

“That’s sad. Home should be where you feel safe and secure.”

I looked to Georg and smiled. The sun was coming back out as we got away from the mountains and it shone brightly overhead. “If it’s clear tonight, I’ll show you what makes me feel safe and secure.”

Georg turned toward me and then back to the road. He squeezed my leg slightly and suddenly I was afraid to move in case Georg remembered where his hand was and decided to pull it away. I wasn’t sure what he wanted from me, and that was both exciting and terrifying. I liked the fact that he thought me attractive enough to be interested in me, because I sure as hell was interested in him. Who wouldn’t be? I’d also had enough quickies and one-night stands to last me the rest of my life. I didn’t need that any longer—a few hours of fun always left me with days of regret. Suppressing a sigh, I decided to enjoy what was happening for now. It was nice. Worrying would only take that away.

We approached the city and Georg removed his hand so he could shift gears. I felt the loss immediately. We wound our way through major city streets in the direction of twin church towers. “That’s the Frauenkirche,” Georg explained. “The Church of Our Lady.” He continued through the old city and out a little ways to an older neighborhood with large homes. Some looked like they had been turned into small hotels. Georg parked in front of a stone building with an iron fence.

“Is this your home?” I asked, looking up at the three-story edifice. It was impressive. The gardens were well kept and the building looked like it had been lovingly maintained for a long time.

“This is my family’s city home.” He turned off the engine, and I shifted in my seat.

“I take it your family is wealthy.” Not that it mattered to me.

Georg turned toward me. “My family goes back a long time in this region. There is an estate outside the city. It’s open to tourists and does well enough to cover expenses and maintenance.” He truly seemed uncomfortable.

“What aren’t you telling me?”

“Within my family there is also a title: Count von Mittelbach. We also took the title as our name some time ago.” Georg turned to me. “Since my father had already passed, that title came to me on my grandfather’s death.”

“So you’re a count?” I smiled. The thought delighted me. “That’s cool.”

Georg shrugged. “The title has brought very little happiness to my family. My grandfather had one son and my father died when I was a child. It was my grandfather’s wish that I get married and have children to carry on the family, but that isn’t likely to happen.” Georg opened his door and I followed suit.

“Why didn’t you say something earlier?”

“I don’t advertise the title.” Georg looked toward the house. “If you’re warm enough, let’s walk toward the market and we can eat and look around. Afterwards I’ll show you the house, if you like.”

“I’m fine,” I said as I stepped onto the sidewalk and waited for Georg. I let him lead the way, though I was beginning to wonder if this was a good idea. Georg had turned quiet and seemed to have withdrawn into himself. I shoved my hands into my pockets and walked alongside him, taking in all that was around me.

“I want people to like me for who I am,” Georg said after we crossed a main street. “My grandfather always introduced himself as Count von Mittelbach. It was very much a part of who he was, his identity, and I guess I still think of it that way.”

“I take it you’ve had people get close to you because of the title?”

“At university there was a parade of women interested in becoming Countess von Mittelbach.” Georg chuckled. “They, of course, were disappointed. But my grandfather still pressured me to marry.”

“Didn’t you say he knew you were gay?”

“Yes, but he didn’t care,” Georg said, shocking me. “He wanted a great-grandson and that was all there was to it. He died last year, disappointed in me.”

“You are who you are. And if that’s your family’s attitude, no wonder they were miserable. It’s a title, not the end of the world. Aren’t there distant relatives that everything will pass to?”

“No. And I’m thinking that’s a good thing. The title will die with me, but the property can now be left to whomever I wish, unless I have a child.” Georg shook his head slightly. “Let’s change the subject to something more interesting than my family’s ridiculousness.”

“I think it’s interesting, you being a count. It goes with your rather dashing appearance. But I liked you before you told me, so it’s no big deal. Though I may gush once or twice, but it’s only because we don’t have counts back home, so it’s a novelty. Well, the concept is a novelty, you’re not a novelty.” God, I was rambling like an idiot. “I’ll just shut up now.”

Georg laughed, full-on. It was a deep, rich tone that delighted my ears. I could listen to that sound all day. Georg stopped walking and continued laughing. I hadn’t thought it was that funny and wondered if I’d said something stupid. “I’ve spent most of my life trying to deal with the ramifications of being Count von Mittelbach, and you sum it up in a few words. No big deal.” I shrugged, and Georg’s laughter died away.

“Maybe it’s the American in me, but you are the person you are and should be judged by your own actions and behavior, not based upon how you were born.” I wondered how to ask my next question, but I was dying to know. “Do you have to work, or do you do it because you like your job?”

“I love my job and I need to work. There is family money, but it pays for upkeep on the properties. Most of it was used up by previous generations who did nothing but live an unsustainable lifestyle. My grandfather never worked, and he was appalled when he had to sit me down to tell me that I would need to get a job after my education. He thought work was beneath us.”

I didn’t know what to say to that. The attitudes of one generation weren’t the attitudes of another. “All that matters is what you think.”

Georg nodded. “Sometimes I feel as though I’m working to preserve a ghost, a family legacy that no longer exists.” He moved closer and lightly bumped my shoulder. “Okay, let’s really change the subject now.”

We were approaching the main square of the old section of Munich. I had visited once, but now the space had been transformed. Canopies lined the square, lit with lights. The air was permeated with the scent of onions, sausage, sauerkraut, and other scents I couldn’t name, but damn they were amazing. I inhaled deeply and smiled. “This is heaven.”

“Come on. Let’s get some sausage for lunch. We can go to the Viktualienmarkt just up the way that makes some of the best.” Georg took my hand. It was starting to feel sort of natural, and I liked it. Jay had never been a touch-centered person. He was more a sex-centered guy, and I liked that Georg touched. It was kind, gentle, and made me feel special, even if it was only for now. At the stand, Georg ordered.

I had expected something like a hot dog, but I was mistaken. The sausage was enormous, grilled and cut into pieces, served with pommes frites, or fries, and Georg added some of the ketchup to the edge. By the time he handed me the paper dish, I was ravenous. He and I moved off to a stand-up table, and I began to eat. The ketchup surprised me and I might never go back to the American version. It was tangy, a little spicy, and damn good.

“It’s currywurst,” Georg explained. “Think of it as the German hot dog, only better.”

I nodded and continued eating. The wind blew through occasionally, and I really wished I’d stopped to buy that sweatshirt like I’d thought of earlier. Georg moved closer, shielding me from the wind and sharing his heat. It was thoughtful of him, and I stepped a little closer. “You always seem so cold,” he whispered into my ear, his hot breath warming more than just the skin it touched.

“I should be used to weather like this after living in Boston. It was warmer up until a few days ago, and I guess I didn’t dress well enough.” I should have known, and I felt like an idiot. All I needed was another layer.

“There will be places to get something if you want it,” Georg said as he finished. I could have eaten more, it was so delicious, but was satisfied for now. I used my napkin, and then Georg disposed of the trash and led me out into the market—and what a place it was, filled with booths of holiday crafts, baked goods, and decorations, most of them handmade and sold by the craftsman. I could not resist the painted beeswax and handcrafted wooden ornaments.

I lost all track of time as I examined each booth. I bought a carved incense smoker for Julie. She loved to cook, so I got her a baker, and the artist even signed it for me. He seemed thrilled when I asked him to. Once it was signed, a nice lady, probably his wife, packed it well, and I added it to my growing bag of purchases.

“I guess I didn’t picture you for a shopper,” Georg said.

“Then why did you bring me here? This is amazing. I can get most of my shopping done all in one place.” Not that I had that much to get—some things for a few friends and that was about it. As night descended and the lights came on everywhere, I bought a final gift and added it to the stack. It was a simple ornament made of wood.

“Why that one?” Georg asked.

“It’s a schoolteacher and it reminds me of my mother. I haven’t spoken to my mom and dad since I came out.” I turned away. Just saying the words was hard.

“Because of something that silly?” Georg asked. “My grandfather was old-fashioned and kept pressuring me to get married, but when I told him I was gay he simply shrugged and said I needed to get married, and then once I had a son, I could take whatever lover I wanted.” Georg grinned. “That was his generation. Marriage was a contract between families to him. You used it to get what you wanted.”

“That seems so… cold.”

“The idea of marriage for love isn’t that old. Marriage united families, kingdoms, and properties for centuries, usually at the cost of the woman. It didn’t matter what she wanted, and I somehow doubt that in this modern age I could have found someone to go along with that arrangement.”

I snickered softly. “Maybe one of those countess wannabes would have been a candidate. After all, she would get the title, and as long as you were up-front with her, then you could have what you wanted.”

“As long as I kept the person I cared for in the closet and out of sight.” Georg shook his head. “No, thank you. I’d rather have the title die out. It’s probably time it did anyway. They are symbolic. Officially they don’t exist. Though if I really wanted, I could probably will that along with the property. There is no aristocracy because there are no reigning monarchs in this country. What’s left of the old aristocracy just kept using their titles. Some have money, most are broke, but almost all of them live somewhat in the past.”

“You don’t,” I said. “And I think the title’s cool. But you need a cape, like in the movies.” I couldn’t help laughing at the face he made. Then he shook his head and looked at me like I’d gone mildly crazy.

“We’ve seen everything and watched the glockenspiel at least three times,” Georg said with an indulgent smile as we passed the last stall in the market.

“I like it.” Every hour I’d felt my gaze drawn upward to watch the Bavarian knight battle his opponent. It was another of those things we didn’t have at home.

“I know you do. But if you’re ready we can walk back.”

It was getting colder, and I quickly agreed. We walked briskly, the activity helping to keep me warm. Once we were in his neighborhood, on his quiet street, Georg put his arm around me and we slowed our pace.

“Thank you for everything. I had a real nice time today.” I kind of figured that day was over. “You didn’t have to do everything you did, but it was memorable.”

“You’re welcome. I had a good time as well.”

We arrived at Georg’s house, and he led me through the gate and up the walk. He unlocked the door, and we stepped inside. The house was dark, but he turned on the lights, and I gasped. The house was filled with antiques, paintings, and all the trappings you’d expect from very old, titled money. The house itself was stunning: carved woodwork and lush carpets that had probably been down for decades. They were worn, but added an air of solidity to the house. “Are those portraits of your ancestors?”

“Yes. That’s my grandfather at the top of the stairs, and they get older as you go downward. My dad didn’t have his portrait painted because he was never the count. Someday maybe I’ll have mine done as a bookend to the end of the line.”

I looked up the open stairs and my gaze traveled downward, going back in time. Georg had tried to make light of the fact that he was who he was, but I could tell it hurt him that all this would come to an end. I didn’t have any answers and wasn’t sure what to say. Georg had just shown me a part of himself that I was sure very few people ever got to see.

“The dining room is in here, and that’s my office. The morning room is just off the kitchen near the back garden.” He showed me through room after palatial room. “Everything is from my grandfather and great-grandfather. We never throw anything out, so things just get older and older.” We went through and out the back door, stepping into the garden. I walked away from the house.

“I can turn on the lights.”

“Please don’t,” I said softly and stopped in the center of a patch of grass, looking up.

Georg came and stood beside me. “The stars,” he whispered.

“Yeah. They’re what settle me. See, these are the same ones we see at home.” I pointed upward. “They look the same no matter where I am, unless I go to Australia, of course.”

“Is that all?” Georg asked.

“No. I look up at them and I see us, all of us.”

“In the stars. Like astrologically?” Georg asked.

“No. Us. We came from there. All the elements in us. Everything about us was created and born in stars. The oxygen we breathe, the water in our skin, the iron in our blood, the stone in your house—all of it comes from the stars. When they explode, they blast their elements everywhere, and that gas, dust, and energy forms new stars, planets, and everything we are. So when I look up, I see the stars and I see them creating what will come next.”

“So you’re saying we’re made of stardust,” Georg said.

“Yeah, we are.”

“I like that, because when you laugh I swear I can see the twinkle of stardust in your eyes.”

I turned toward Georg, and he lightly worked his hand behind my head and slowly moved closer. At first I wasn’t sure he was going to kiss me, or even if I wanted to be kissed. Jay’s words rang in my head and they almost made me hesitate, but by the time I had thought about it, Georg’s lips touched mine. At that point I let those concerns go and returned Georg’s kiss. He tasted spicy and warm, and I turned slightly. Georg pulled me closer and deepened the kiss slightly, moving his lips against mine. Then, too quickly, he pulled away.

I breathed deeply to inhale the last of his scent before the cold night air carried it away.

“You hesitated. Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” I whispered, not wanting to tell him that Jay had told me on numerous occasions that I kissed like a dead fish, and had even once proceeded to explain how I should be kissing. That, of course, only made me more self-conscious. I finally decided that was part of his plan. “Was I okay?”

Georg didn’t answer with words and instead kissed me again. Then he backed away and gathered me close, pressing me to him. “Tell me more about stardust.”

I wasn’t sure how much I should say. “Well, all elements are made in the stars. Bigger ones make heavier elements, and when they die and explode, they seed the beginnings of new stars, planets, and even create the building blocks of life. You and I, nothing we see, would exist without them. They’re like the mother and father of us all.” I looked back up at the dark sky peppered with points of light. We could see more if we were outside the city, but there were enough to see standing in the dark backyard to make an impressive display. “That’s why I do what I do. I hope someday we can see back to the beginning, to where we began.”

“I don’t understand,” Georg whispered.

“That’s why we’re building the lens. The farther away we go, the farther back in time we travel—millions, billions of years. With the mirror we’re building, we can see farther away than ever, maybe back to the very beginning. That’s where we all began, and everything we see and touch had its start in those first stars.” I swallowed and wondered just how incredibly geeky I sounded. If I wanted to say something romantic, I could at least have looked into his eyes or something, but instead I started talking about the origin of the universe. Yeah, I was the king of geeks. Crown me now and get it the hell over with.

I started to shiver, and Georg began moving us toward the house. “We should go inside. It’s going to get very cold out here.” I nodded, and Georg opened the kitchen door and we stepped inside. “The place can be rather drafty, but this room is almost always toasty warm.” He took off his coat, and I did the same. I handed Georg back his scarf and sat at the large trestle table in the center of the room.

“I thought I would cook dinner if you’re up for my cooking,” Georg said.

“That sounds nice. I can help if you like,” I offered, but Georg was already getting out what he needed, so I stayed where I was and he got to work.

“I don’t cook very much because it’s generally just me. So on my way home I either stop and have dinner or grab takeaway. I love kebab, so I get that once a week. It’s Turkish food and very good. You should try it while you’re here.”

“I don’t think I’ve had Turkish food before.” Georg heated up a pan and began cutting up vegetables. “Where did you learn to cook?”

“I was interested in it, though no one ever taught me, so I took a class a few years ago. I got tired of heating things up, so I went to a culinary institute in the evenings to learn proper cooking.” He pulled dough out of the refrigerator.

“What are you making?”

“My specialty. Vegetable strudel.” Georg set the dough aside and dropped the vegetables into boiling water for a few minutes, then drained them and set them aside. He finished working with them and then stretched the dough out thin before rolling the vegetables into the dough. I watched, fascinated, as he shaped it, brushed it with lots of butter, and then placed it in the oven.

“I’ve heard of apple strudel, but not vegetable.”

“It’s really good. Now I just have to make the sauce to go with it and let it bake.” Georg began working again and I watched. Before he got far, Georg opened a bottle of wine and poured two glasses, then handed me one. I raised it.

“To a wonderful dinner, and thank you for an amazing day.”

We clinked our glasses and drank.

“I really hope you like it.” Georg said.

After a few minutes the rich scent of baking dough filled the kitchen. Except for the modern appliances, the room looked like the rest of the house, like it had been trapped in the last century. It had a warmth, a permanency about it that was reassuring, like the table I sat at. How many people had sat at this table? Had Georg sat here when he was a kid, waiting for the cook to pull a batch of cookies out of the oven? I liked to think so. The wood had been worn smooth by decades of hands, and the occasional scratches told of use.

My stomach growled. The sausage I’d had for lunch was definitely wearing off. I was tempted to drink more wine, but knew that would be a terrible idea on an empty stomach, so I sipped from my glass. Georg finished the sauce and then set it aside. Once again I wasn’t sure what we should talk about. Georg was busy, so I stood and wandered to the back door, looking out into the dark garden.

“My grandmother had a real talent,” Georg said from behind me. “She designed the garden years ago, and my grandfather kept it just the way she had it. Now I do the same. She designed it so that no matter what season it is, there’s something to see. The fountains she put in look wonderful whether they’re running or covered with snow.” I felt him move closer. “Is something wrong?”

“No.” I chuckled and turned around. “I’ve never been good with the casual thing, if you know what I mean.”

“I’m sorry, but I really don’t.”

“I did plenty of easy hookups when I was in college. It was simple and there were no attachments. Usually we were on different paths and our lives just intersected for a night or two.”

“Is that a nice way of saying you had one-night stands?” Georg asked.

“Yes, I did. But I don’t do those anymore.” Why I was telling Georg this was beyond me. When I was around him, my mouth seemed to go before my brain engaged and I’d say the first thing that came into my mind.

“Neither do I,” Georg whispered and lightly traced his fingers over my hair, sending a shiver down my spine. “I haven’t done those things in quite a while.”

“Have you had anyone special in your life?” God, I was rambling. I stopped myself as nerves jangled and my heart pounded once again, each touch increasing its speed.

“I have. But they never worked out. Guys thought being the boyfriend of a count was going to be glamorous and exciting. It seems I’m none of those things, and once they found that out, they decided they weren’t as interested as they’d thought.” Georg stopped running his fingers through my hair and then pulled away. I turned around.

“I don’t care about the title or anything else that goes with it.” I shrugged.

“I know.” Georg smiled. “The one person I was reluctant to tell was the one who doesn’t care. It figures.”

“So is it?” I asked.

“What?”

“A casual thing for you? If it is, I can deal with that. I mean, I’m only here for a few weeks, and we can be friends and do things if you like.”

“It isn’t a casual thing.” Georg slipped his hand in mine. “But yes, you’re only here for a few weeks, and I can deal with that if you can.” He stepped closer and I let him. Hell, I helped close the distance, and when our lips met, I clung to him as though I were a drowning man and he the only person able to save me. Georg wrapped me in his strong arms, and I went willingly. It didn’t matter that I was only here for a short time. All that mattered was that I was here, right now, with him. I didn’t do casual, but right now, I’d follow Georg anywhere.

His kiss tugged the air from my lungs, and as soon as it broke, I gasped for breath and returned for more. He tasted like cream, sweet and rich, and damn if I didn’t want more. A timer went off in the kitchen, its ding reminding me of the bell that sounds at the end of a round in boxing. Georg moved away, and I hoped like hell I could keep my legs underneath me.

“I need to take dinner out of the oven,” Georg whispered, and I nodded. He didn’t move.

“Georg,” I said softly, prodding him, though I had no idea why. The blood supply had left my brain and distinctly settled much lower. He turned back toward the kitchen, and I used the moment to adjust my throbbing cock. It had been a long time since I’d felt that kind of driving need for someone, and I wanted to scream that when I did, it had to be temporary, that the possibilities had a finish date.

I knew I should have dinner and ask Georg to drive me home. I could stay in one piece and keep it together if we went back to being colleagues with the distance of only a professional relationship. That would be the easy way, the prudent thing to do.

“Duncan,” Georg called from the kitchen, and I followed the sound of his rich voice like he was the pied piper. My heart was already engaged and I couldn’t walk away. A stronger man might have been able to do it, but I couldn’t. I’d take whatever time I had and try to make this a happy holiday season. Live one day at a time—that was what I told myself. Enjoy what I had for as long as I had it. I walked into the kitchen and sat back down at the table, taking a drink of my wine as Georg fixed two plates.

“We can go in the dining room if you like.” He set the plates on the table, and I placed my hand on top of his.

“Right here is just fine.” I smiled slightly.

“You seem to have made up your mind,” Georg said softly. I had hoped I wasn’t being so obvious. “I hope it was in my favor.”

I leaned across the table, and Georg did the same. Our lips met in the center of the narrow work table. “I made up my mind.” Georg was worth taking the chance. We had weeks left together and we should enjoy them. If nothing else, I would have some wonderful memories to carry with me.

We sat back down and began to eat. The food was amazing—the pastry light, the sauce rich, the vegetables savory—as was the view across the table. I tried to keep a grin off my face and ended up looking away a few times so I didn’t seem completely weird. At least doing something as normal as eating, even if the food was anything but normal, calmed me down and let me think and just be happy.

Once the meal was over, I was stuffed with the best dinner I could remember since I was sixteen years old, when my mom had made my favorite pot roast, just the way I liked it, with a touch of chili for heat, for my birthday. The memory of my mother stabbed at me for a second. It must have shown on my face, but I did my best to cover it. I took Georg’s hand and let the memory fade. There was no use thinking about her or my father now. They had made their feelings very clear, and I had to live with it. I had done so for years, and it was no different now.

Georg cleared away the dishes and placed them in the sink. He took care of the leftover food as well, and then took me by the hand and led me back through the opulent rooms and up the main staircase, past all the portraits of his ancestors.

“Was the house damaged during the war?”

“No. This particular neighborhood escaped most of the bombing. My grandfather told me that most of the items were packed away and stored in the basement once it became apparent that everything was in danger. He said the only thing that happened was that part of the ceiling in the morning room came down from the shaking. We were very lucky, so the house here was spared, as was our estate in the country.” We stopped at the top of the stairs, and I looked down at the main floor. Then Georg squeezed my hand and led me down the hallway to the room at the very end.

He opened the door and led me inside. The room was comfortable and relatively plain—not what I had been expecting. “The others are very fancy. But I can’t stay in the room my grandfather used. It just didn’t feel right, so I still use the one I’ve always had.” The bed was large and solid, dark, with solid posts reaching almost to the ceiling. Georg closed the door and stood in front of me. Confidence went out the window right then and there; I could feel it sprouting wings and heading for the door. My knees shook and I tried my best to hide it. All those comments from Jay played in my head. I knew I shouldn’t let them, but I couldn’t help it.

“Duncan,” Georg said softly. “You seem far away. We don’t have to do this. I can take you back to your hotel if you want.”

I shook my head and took a deep breath. I had to get that voice out of my head. Jay was an ass, and I couldn’t let him define how I thought of myself in the bedroom. I locked my gaze on Georg’s and moved closer. It was now or never, time to push away that part of my past.

Georg engulfed me in strong arms and pulled me close. He found my lips with his, the kiss confident and sure, drawing me out of myself. I clutched at Georg, holding him as I returned his kiss. Slowly light replaced the darkness and I let Georg in, and as soon as I did, the energy from earlier, Georg’s energy that had left me breathless, did the same thing. I forgot about Jay and everything else as Georg consumed all my attention. All he’d done was kiss and hold me, and I was happy.

Georg unbuttoned my shirt and slipped it off my shoulders and arms. Then he tugged at my T-shirt, and I lifted my hands in the air. He pulled my shirt off and let it go. Warm hands, firm and gentle, caressed my chest and then stilled as Georg deepened the kiss, taking possession of my mouth with his lips and probing tongue. I moaned softly, and then louder and louder as excitement and passion built from deep inside. When Georg paused, it was to remove his own shirt, and I got to touch. My own skin was smooth, but Georg’s chest was covered with dark hair, and I stroked it. It was rough on my hands, and I loved it.

He guided me toward the bed, and I went willingly, sitting on the edge and gently tugging Georg on top of me. He pressed his chest to mine, skin to skin, heat to heat. My pants were so tight now, it was painful. I sighed when I felt Georg’s fingers on my belly, and when he undid my belt and opened the catch of my jeans, I sighed.

“You’re very handsome,” Georg told me, looking down as I lay beneath him. He traced my chest and belly lightly with his fingers, my muscles quivering beneath each touch. I wanted him badly and tugged him closer, sliding my hand down his back to his waistband. His pants were tight, so I was only able to slip my fingers underneath. Georg groaned softly as I slid my hands around his hips to undo his belt.

Georg backed away, withdrawing his contact. He opened his pants and slipped them off, then draped them across the back of the chair. Then he tugged at the cuffs of my pants, laughing when they slid off my legs. His joy and excitement filled the room. “You know, it’s okay to laugh and have fun when making love.”

I swallowed and wondered if Georg realized what he’d said or if he meant what he’d said. I assumed he was using the term generically. “It hasn’t been like that for me.” Jay was intense and controlling. Sex was not happy, but something else altogether. Georg stepped closer, parted my legs, and then leaned over me. He ran his fingers up my ribs, and I giggled and writhed to get away.

“See, you can laugh all you want. This is the height of what makes us human. In your terms, if we’re all stardust, then this is the stars’ greatest gift.” Georg stopped talking and put his mouth to better use.

I arched my back when he sucked on my chest, driving forward for more, which he gave at the slightest indication. Georg seemed to read my body like a book. I didn’t have to say what I wanted; he simply gave. If I hitched my breath, he stopped, licking that spot at the base of my neck once again until my eyes crossed, and when he tugged off the last of our clothes and we were together, body to body, lips to lips, heart to heart, it was perfect and felt so right. When he pulled away I ached for him, and when he was in my arms, I felt whole. How this could be after just a few days I didn’t know, but I thanked the stars for it.

When we came together, Georg deep inside me, I gasped and held on, his movements slow, deep, and so meaningful that I knew it had to be my imagination. Hell, I had to be dreaming, except no dream felt like this. Even the best ones were one-sided, and this was anything but. Georg took me places I never dreamed possible, and when we reached the absolute heights of passion, my breath left me. I gasped for air, willing my brain to function, and dug my fingers into Georg’s shoulders to ground me. I had to, to keep from flying apart into a million pieces. I could take no more, the pressure too great, and I tumbled over the edge… no… I rocketed into outer space, away from my body, until I floated free, weightless and wonderful, holding Georg to keep from flying away forever. I knew I had to be in space, because I saw stars.