Holiday Hoax (Windy City Holidates #3)

Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16

MIA

Ian wakes up before me again but doesn’t notice me staring at him as he reads. His brow furrows as he flips the page, his deep blue eyes scanning each line quickly. His hair is messy, his glasses perch on his aristocratic nose, and his naked chest rises and falls slowly and deeply. My eyes prick as I watch him with a foreign warmth running through my veins.

It’s safe to say Sunday mornings are my favorite now, too. I love sleeping in with him, actually sleeping in while he wakes and reads. I don’t even know what time he gets up. The fact that this is something I could easily get used to scares me.

This feels too good to be true, like I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop. For him to wake up tomorrow and realize he could be with someone who makes more sense. Someone who the society pages of the newspaper he reads every morning would want to run a big story on. Not a twenty-something-year-old woman with more debt than money to her name.

“Good morning, beautiful,” he says without looking up from the page, pulling me from my dark thoughts. “Get your fill of checking me out?”

“Not nearly.” I mean it, I could wake up beside him forever and probably still find new things to obsess over.

“Good.”

I’m torn between staying in the safety of his sheets, tucked in close beside him while he reads, and fleeing back to the safety of my own apartment. He sets his book on the bedside table and slides back down under the covers next to me. I melt into his embrace as he pulls me against the cool skin of his chest.

“Let’s stay in bed all day.”

“I can’t.” Even if I wanted to, I know I shouldn’t. “I’m going to go see my parents today.”

It’s not the full truth. Nico told me he was going to see them today with Stella and told me I could come along if I wanted. It would be nice to go out there without relying on public transportation, so I’m going to take him up on it. Plus, it’ll give me a reason to put a little distance between myself and Ian.

I need to gain some perspective. It’s too hard to think clearly when we’re together because he’s so wonderful to me that my judgement can feel clouded. Not to mention the physicality of our relationship.

Even now I can feel him looking at the top of my head where it rests on his chest while he tries to figure out what I’m thinking. He doesn’t need to ask for me to know what he’s doing. That’s the scariest part, the way I intrinsically know what he’s doing, what he’s thinking.

“When can I see you again?” he asks as he presses his lips to my hair.

“I’m not sure what my week looks like at work yet. I’ll let you know.” I try to scramble from his arms, but he holds me close.

“Hey.” He puts his finger beneath my chin, lifting it until he can see my eyes. “I really loved having you here this weekend. Spending all my time with you was just what I needed.”

A crack works its way through my resolve. “I had a good time, too.”

It’s not a lie. I’ve never meant anything more. For as many differences as he and I have, we still work together so well. It feels like it’s too good, though.

I press a kiss to his lips, lingering as he deepens the kiss. He runs the tip of his nose along mine as the kiss ends. I wonder if he knows he does that or if it’s just him. I love the tenderness of the gesture; it makes me feel cherished.

“I guess I’ll let you go.” He locks his arms around me. “But I don’t want to. Do you want me to drive you home?”

“No, I’ll just take an Uber. Nico might be waiting at my place.” That isn’t the truth, but it isn’t outside the realm of possibility. Nico and Stella are picking me up, but it won’t be for another hour or two.

I give him one more kiss and then extract myself from his arms. He picks his book back up while I change clothes and freshen up. As I walk around his bedroom collecting my clothes from the past few days, he stands and pulls on a pair of sweatpants to wear to walk me out.

I let him pull me close for another long, lingering kiss as we wait for his elevator. He sticks his hand on the doors to hold them open for me.

“Your Uber is downstairs waiting,” he says as we break apart. “Let me know when you get back.”

“Thanks for getting me one.”

“Of course, it’s the least I could do when you wouldn’t let me drive you home. Talk later?” he asks. I think he’s feeling my hesitancy because I can hear the vulnerability in the question.

“Yes.” I press another quick kiss to his lips and step on the elevator.

He waves as the doors close. As soon as the car starts moving down, I slump back against the steel wall. This is normally something I’d go to Nico with. Even when he was deep in single man life, he always gave the best advice. If I bring it up with him, he’ll want to know names, though. I don’t know if that’s something Ian wants.

But I won’t be able to focus on anything else if I don’t talk about this with someone. I need to weigh everything out to work through my feelings and reservations. Maybe I can just convince him not to ask questions.

“What’s going on with you?” Nico asks, cornering me in our parents’ kitchen while they sit in the dining room with Stella. “You’ve been distracted thinking about something.”

I sigh and consider brushing him off. I could easily deflect and ask about Stella, who looks really pale again today. But this is the opening I need.

“I’ll talk to you if you just listen and don’t ask questions. No trying to solve my problems.” I point my finger at him to let him know I’m serious.

He bats my finger away and rolls his eyes. “No promises, but now you really have to tell me. Is it about a guy?”

“Yes.”

His eyes narrow fractionally. He might be my best friend, but he’s first and foremost my protective older brother. “Go on.”

“He’s kind and smart with a well-established career. We have so much fun together. It’s completely different, he is completely different from any of the guys I’ve dated before. We didn’t even start romantically, we started as friends.”

“I’m not seeing a problem.”

“There’s a significant age gap.”

“What are we talking here? Five years or fifty?”

“Ten-ish.” I don’t want to give him the exact number of years in case he figures it out.

“Not too bad.”

“He’s been sending me flowers. He bought me shoes because the ones I was wearing gave me blisters. He gave me a Christian Dior handbag when I made an offhand comment about needing a purse.”

Nico covers his heart with a mock gasp. “What a monster.”

I give him a half-hearted shove. “I just feel like I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“You think he’s trying to buy your affection, use it in some quid pro quo situation?” He goes from teasing me to serious in the beat of a heart.

“No, actually. That would make it easier.” I’ve mulled over if I’m worrying this way because it feels like he is attempting to buy my affection or love bomb me, but that’s definitely not it. “I think he is exceptionally generous and has more money than he could spend in his lifetime.”

“I see.” He gazes off into space while he thinks. “What are you afraid of?”

“That I’m falling in love with him.”

“Don’t be afraid of love.” His eyes meet mine. “You deserve to be loved. To be taken care of.”

Would Nico say that if he knew the man I was talking about is his brother-in-law? I’m not sure he would. Not because he has a low opinion of Ian but because it could be messy. I can’t bring that up with him. He’d immediately figure it out.

“Speaking of love and being taken care of, how is Stella?” I ask quietly, changing the subject. “She still looks pretty pale.”

“Yeah, I’m worried, too. She thinks she’s just trying to get used to the newest medication she’s trying.”

I don’t know enough specifics about her health and treatment to say one way or another, so I listen as he opens up about everything they’re trying. Eventually Mom comes in and breaks up our conversation by insisting we sit down and have some dessert. We sit around the table for another hour before it’s time for us to head back into the city.

My apartment feels cold and empty after being away for the weekend. I spend an hour or so picking up and taking trash out to the chute. I don’t have anything in the cupboard to eat aside from an old package of ramen which I make and eat while catching up on one of my shows. My phone lights up with an incoming call from Ian.

My fingers itch to answer it, but I hold myself back. It’s not that I want to play games, I’m just scared. I wait until it shows a voicemail notification before I risk picking it up. I consider not listening to the voicemail, but the need to hear his voice is too strong.

Nothing could have prepared me for what I hear as a woman’s voice leaves a message. Before I even have all the details I’m throwing on the closest pair of shoes and grabbing my purse to run out the door. My hands shake as I pull up the Uber app and order a car to Chicago General.

Ian was rushed to the hospital, but that’s all I know. Everything seems to take too long. The elevator. Waiting two minutes for my ride. I just need to get to him.

I should’ve answered the phone. At least then I’d have a better idea of what is going on. But oh, no, I had to be too scared of my feelings. So stupid.

My eyes sting as I climb into the backseat of the sedan that stops for me. It reeks of cigarette smoke, so I crack the window. I angrily swipe the tears from my cheeks as I drown in fear for him.

The driver barely puts her car in park before I’m vaulting from the backseat and running into the emergency department entrance. There’s a godforsaken line at the reception desk. I take a deep breath and will myself to dig deep for patience. The people in front of me are likely just as worried for loved ones as I am.

Loved ones.

Love?

Do I love him?

I do.

A fresh wave of tears runs down my cheeks as the realization sinks in. I love him. The line moves and it’s my turn.

“Hi, my boyfriend was brought in a little bit ago. His name is Ian Jameson.”

“I’m sorry. Only family members are allowed back.”

“What? I’m his girlfriend.”

“You’ll have to wait until he regains consciousness and asks for you. Or a family member vouches for you.”

“Can you tell me how he is?” I grit out through clenched teeth.

“Not unless you’re listed as an emergency contact.”

I scrub my fingers over my eyes. “Can you at least tell me what he was brought in for?”

She looks down at her computer. “I’m not supposed to, but he was brought in by ambulance for anaphylaxis.”

“Thank you.” I can tell she’s not going to be any more help but at least she gave me that much information.

I just sit down in a plastic chair when I see Delia and Henry go running to the front desk. The doors open for them immediately. Probably doesn’t hurt when I’m pretty sure their names are on some wing of the building.

The doors are just starting to close again when I glance at the front desk and see it empty. Taking my chance, I dart through the door just as they’re about to close and catch up to the Jamesons. Delia looks terrified while Henry has a calming, soothing presence. He rubs small circles on her back.

Thankfully neither of them even spare me a glance. I’m not sure if they would remember me or not, though I lean toward it being unlikely. I step onto the elevator after them, tucking myself into the corner, so they’ll naturally step off in front of me.

“I sent Stella a text,” Henry says as the elevator doors open. “She said they’re on the way.”