Holiday Promise (Hollyberry Harbor #2)

Chapter 12

TWELVE

Blake locked himself in his office for the next couple of days. He didn’t think he’d be able to see Melody face to face without pulling her aside and telling her she was wrong. Misery didn’t begin to describe how he felt. Each beat of his heart was pure and utter agony. He’d only felt this way once before in his life and that was when he’d lost Alison.

Now that the pain from that loss had subsided, this new ache almost had more intensity.

He couldn’t avoid his son, and that meant doing his best to plan outings with just the two of them. But it didn’t stop Blake from hearing Melody’s voice and wishing things were different. It didn’t stop his heart from crumbling when he saw her from across the room.

This is what she wanted, he reminded himself. She didn’t want to be stuck in a relationship with him. Who would? He had been controlling. He’d always been that way. Alison had told him that he needed to learn to be more flexible and he’d brushed her off.

He sat at his desk with his head in his hands, failing miserably at keeping his mind off of Melody. The worst part was that he knew exactly where he’d gone wrong. Melody didn’t like being put in a cage. She didn’t want to be controlled by the person who loved her. The problem was, he couldn’t see a future where she wouldn’t feel that way.

Melody was a free spirt. Blake would always be the CEO of a major company. They were simply too different.

Lifting his head to the soft knock at the door, he braced himself for seeing Melody enter. Instead, Max came darting inside. He bounced on his toes with excitement. “Dad can we go yet?”

Melody stood in the doorway, making it hard to concentrate. His eyes locked with hers and she shifted uncomfortable. They hadn’t spoken of anything other than Max for the last couple of days and he found he missed their conversations more than he’d thought possible.

“Dad, Dad, Dad,” Max continued.

Blake dragged his gaze to his son. “What did you want to do?”

“ Dad ,” Max groaned. “You promised me you’d take me to see Santa today. So can we go yet? We can get hot chocolate.”

He chuckled despite his wounded heart. “I can take you when my work is done. It’s going to be a little while yet. I’m sure Melody can entertain you until I’m ready.”

Max pouted. “But?—”

“It’s fine, Max. We’ll find something fun to do. Let your dad get his work done.” Melody beckoned Max toward him.

“Melody?” Blake stood. Her name tasted bitter in his mouth but calling her by her first name would’ve hurt more. “A word?”

She glanced at him and it wasn’t hard to see the worry in her eyes. She didn’t want to be left alone with him. He couldn’t blame her. The last time they’d been alone, he’d pushed her away from him—he’d scared her off.

Melody didn’t have to be worried about him trying to win her back. He knew that wasn’t a possibility. She deserved to have the freedoms she wanted. He should’ve never allowed himself to get close to her. Thomas had been right to advise against it.

Lately, speaking with Thomas had also been difficult. It was clear his assistant liked to flirt with Melody, and it made Blake completely sick to his stomach. But Melody didn’t belong to him and technically she didn’t work with Thomas, so he couldn’t ask that they remain professional.

Melody ushered Max out of the office and shut the door behind her. “What is it you needed to speak about?” Her voice was quiet, timid almost. He thought he might have heard a hint of hope beneath it, but that was reaching. She didn’t want anything to do with him.

He stood, pressing his hands onto his desk. “I’ve been considering the way things have been going lately and I want to make a few changes.”

Her eyes widened. She looked like she was frozen to the door she leaned against. “You do?” she whispered.

“Yes. Max seems to be doing so much better with me at home more.”

Color flooded her cheeks, and she looked away. “Yes, he has.”

“I wanted to discuss with you the possibility of continuing the current arrangement. Obviously, I’ll have to take more trips back to the city than I have since the start of December, but I want to increase the time I work from home—for Max’s sake.”

Her eyes darted to meet his briefly, then away. “I think that’s a wonderful idea.”

He nodded sharply. “I do, too. I’ll notify Thomas and when I have a schedule written up, I’ll be sure to give it to you.”

Melody nodded. “Is that all?”

He wanted to tell her no. He wanted to march across the room and tell her he couldn’t get her out of his head—that this was no way for a man to live.

“Yes, you may go.” His voice sounded foreign even to him. Those were the only words that he could push past his lips. There would be no winning her back. With how hard it was to see her every day and not be able to be with her, he knew it would only get harder if he tried winning her back only for it to blow up in his face.

Blake held Max’s hand as they walked down the street after visiting the pastry shop to get their hot chocolate.

A thin, brown mustache lined the top of Max’s mouth, making Blake smile. When he looked up at his dad he frowned. “What’s the matter? Do you miss Melody?”

Blake stiffened. It shouldn’t have been a surprise that his son noticed the changes that were occurring between himself and Melody. Max had always been observant. Still, Blake couldn’t let his son catch him off guard. “Why would I miss her? I see her every day.”

In the most childlike way possible, Max gave his father a look that indicated that’s not what he meant. “I know you like her, Dad.”

“You like her too,” Blake accused.

Max sighed. “You like her more. I saw it. You’re… happier.”

Blake’s chest constricted to the point it cut off the airflow to his lungs. “Yes. I like her,” he said softly. “But that doesn’t always mean things work out the way we want them to. Sometimes wishes are just meant to stay wishes. Sometimes they don’t come true. But that doesn’t mean that I love you any less. And it doesn’t mean that Miss Metcalf loves you any less, either. No matter what happens, I’ll always be there for you.”

Max frowned, slowing his steps. Then he turned his face upward and stared hard at his father. “I know that.”

“Good.”

“And Melody will be there for me, too.”

Blake’s heart broke for his son. One day Melody wouldn’t be needed any longer. She would move on to take care of another family. She might get married. And that thought alone only added to the ache Blake couldn’t make go away.

Max peered at his father with an intensity that was more mature than his son had been known to give. “If you like her, then you should kiss her.”

Blake shook his head. “It’s not as simple as that, bud.”

“But you always said if I want something bad enough, then I can figure it out.”

He chuckled, if only to prevent himself from breaking down. It was in this moment that Blake had to fully accept just how much he cared for Melody. It wasn’t a simple attachment. It wasn’t something he could toss aside and get over. Deep down, he knew that his heart belonged to her in a way he hadn’t planned. “You’re right. If you want something bad enough, then you can figure it out. But Melody isn’t some thing . She’s a person. And relationships between people come with compromise. They can only work with both people want the same thing.”

Max tilted his head in confusion. “You don’t think Miss Melody wants to kiss you anymore?”

Slowly, Blake shook his head. “I don’t think she wants to kiss me. Even though she loves you, she doesn’t love me.”

“But how do you know?”

His innocent questions were getting harder and harder to answer. Blake didn’t know how to handle this one. All he could do was shrug. “I suppose that’s just something you figure out when you get older. Sometimes you find someone who is everything you want, and you make it work. Sometimes you find someone you want, but it simply can’t. It’s like the puzzles you like to do with Miss Melody. There are pieces that might look like they fit in a certain spot, but they just don’t connect.”

Max’s lips puckered as he appeared to take in what his father was telling him, then he shook his head. “I think you’re wrong.”

Blake chuckled. “Yeah, maybe. How about right now we don’t focus on that? Let’s go see Santa and tell him exactly what you want this year.”

The smile returned to Max’s face, and he nodded. “I know exactly what to ask for.”