How Laura Lewis Met Richard Brown

Chapter Thirty

The evening stretched ahead for Laura who felt trapped within the thick stone walls of Church View Cottage. She had stomped along the narrow lanes back home, having made her excuses to Tracey. Her eyes stung with unshed tears and her throat felt thick and swollen. She had practically run home in an attempt to shed the rage building up within her. That and the burning shame she still felt for what had happened.

The bottle of white wine she had taken from the fridge now stood unopened on the kitchen table. Droplets of condensation ran down the outside and smeared the wooden table top.

She had wanted a drink so badly but had refused to open the bottle. One glass would lead to another, and before she knew it the bottle would be empty. So she picked it up and placed it back in the fridge. A reminder that she didn’t want or need it.

There was a restless fizzing inside her. She needed to do something, but she didn’t know what. She dared not step outside for fear of who she might bump into.

She needed to think. She needed to plan her next step.

Richard knew about her past and he would never look at her in the same way again. She had seen the look of pity on his face, but she had ignored it, not suspecting for a minute that he knew about Mark and her reasons for moving to Buttermarsh. How stupid she had been.

Richard knew, and that meant that so did Megan and Jack and Tracey.

What must they think of her?

She hadn’t set out to live a lie. All she had wanted was a fresh start. But now, not revealing her past might just jeopardise her future here. Then what? Where could she go? She couldn’t go back home with her tail between her legs. Although they wouldn’t tell her outright, she knew what her mother and sister would be thinking.

We told you so.

Laura steadied her breathing and sank down onto the kitchen chair. She forced herself to think like a rational person.

She had been under no obligation to tell anyone about her past. It was her right to live a secluded and private life. She had done nothing wrong. If Richard hadn’t played private investigator then no one would be any the wiser.

No harm done.

But they did know. So what should she do?

She could ignore Richard. But the problem was that the village was only small and the likelihood was that she would bump into him at some point. She could choose not to stop and talk to him, but he visited the home to see Gertie. She couldn’t avoid him there. The only way to deal with that problem was to act in her usual professional manner, or to request that she didn’t work on Gertie’s floor. But she loved Gertie, so that wouldn’t be fair on either of them.

Laura buried her face in her hands. The situation was hopeless. A complete mess.

She would just have to face it head-on. Be strong. She didn’t have to explain her actions. She hadn’t lied. She had just omitted the truth. She was still Laura and she was still working in the caring profession. She had blown this up out of all proportion.

The one thing that she could not do was forgive Richard for his lack of trust. The fact that he hadn’t trusted her was what hurt the most.

She swallowed down the urge to cry because of what had happened with Richard.

She glanced at her phone which she’d placed on the table, wondering if she should give Lottie a call. Talk through what had happened this afternoon.

Laura sighed. It was only eight o’clock. Far too early to go to bed. She just wanted to bury herself under the duvet and forget the whole day. Moving here was meant to be a new start, but Laura had found herself coming full circle. Everything began and ended with Mark.

She was just contemplating going up to bed with a cup of tea and a book when the doorbell rang.

There was another thing she had wanted when she’d planned her move to Buttermarsh. A quiet hideaway where she knew nobody and would have no visitors. It hadn’t quite worked out that way.

She didn’t have to answer the door. She could hide in the kitchen until whoever it was gave up and went away.

She sat on the wooden kitchen chair and held her breath. Quite why she didn’t know.

The doorbell rang again.

Please go away, whoever you are. I’m not in the mood.

Laura strained her ears for the retreating footsteps.

Nothing. Please go away.

The sound of knocking on the door.

Laura jumped, her heart pounding in her chest.

The letter-box flap was pulled open.

‘Please, Laura, let me in. I just want to have a quick chat. I don’t want an argument. Honest. I just think you need a friend.’

Megan, not Richard.

Laura knew she wouldn’t go away. Reluctantly, she opened the door. She said nothing as she allowed Megan to follow her down the hallway into the kitchen.

Laura sat down. Megan mirrored her, sitting on the opposite chair.

‘So, now you know,’ Laura said, offering Megan a defiant look. She would not make herself look weak. She would not apologise for hiding her past. It was her business. Nobody else’s. Let them think the worst of her.

‘I’m glad we know,’ Megan said. ‘About Mark and what happened to him. Why you moved here. We wish you could have told us. I can’t imagine what you’ve been though.’

‘I needed—’

Megan cut her off with a wave of her hand. ‘You don’t need to tell me anything, Laura. I’m mad at Richard, and I told him so. I’m not mad at you. Why would I be? You did nothing wrong.’

The tears that had been threatening to flow all afternoon suddenly burst free. Laura couldn’t stop them.

‘Oh, Laura,’ Megan said, jumping up from her chair and placing a comforting arm around her shoulder.

It had been such a long time since Laura had been held, and it felt both alien and comforting at the same time.

‘I’m sorry,’ Laura said between sobs. ‘Sorry for getting upset.’

‘Oh, don’t be daft,’ Megan said soothingly as she rubbed Laura’s back. ‘Listen, why don’t you go and sort yourself out, and I’ll make us a cup of tea, eh?’

Laura tried to smile and did as she was told.

* * *

In the end, Megan stayed for over an hour and Laura had been sad to let her go, But Megan had an early start in the morning. She was off to London for a conference. Laura had waved her off and had then made herself another cup of tea. She took her cup, book and phone into the snug with her. As she sipped her tea, she mulled over Megan’s words — You did nothing wrong .

The bleak truth was that Laura could no longer trust him. Whatever had been growing between them, and she still didn’t know quite what that was, had disappeared in a puff of smoke. He had gone behind her back and that stung. His actions had completely jeopardised her future in Buttermarsh.

Laura’s head hurt. She didn’t need this drama. She was going around in circles.

She needed Lottie.

Scrolling through her contacts, she found Lottie’s number and hit the call button.

Lottie answered on the second ring.

‘Hi, you okay, Laura?’ Laura could hear that she was out of breath. Had she run to pick up the phone?

‘Hi, I’m fine. Just thought I’d give you a call,’ Laura said.

There was a pause before Lottie spoke. ‘Laura, I know you too well. What’s happened?’

So, Laura told her sister what had happened, the words tumbling out in a wonderful release.

* * *

‘It’ll all work out, mate, don’t worry,’ Jack said, as he handed Richard a cup of coffee.

The two men were alone in the sitting room. Tracey had gone back home and Megan had popped out to the shop, or so she had said.

Henry had been tucked up in bed.

The house was quiet. All that could be heard was the rolling news on the television, set at a low volume.

‘I should never have done that internet search,’ Richard said. ‘What must she think of me? Going behind her back like that.’

Jack balanced his cup on his knee. Then he appeared to measure his words. ‘I can’t believe you did that. It’s so out of character.’

‘Tell me about it. I’m regretting it now,’ Richard said. He put his cup down on the coffee table and hunched forward, elbows on knees.

Jack placed a hand on Richard’s shoulder. ‘Listen, what’s done is done. You can’t change that. Do you want my advice?’

Richard nodded. He needed all the help he could get right now.

‘I know that you have feelings for this woman—’

Richard made a noise of protest, but Jack carried on. ‘You do, I can tell, and although you may not admit this to yourself, it’s obvious to me. If you want Laura to still be a part of your life, then what you need to do is very simple.’

Richard sat up straighter. He was all ears.

‘Give her time and hope that she forgives you.’

* * *

‘Laura, I can’t believe he did that!’ Lottie said, followed by a sigh. ‘No wonder you’re so upset.’

‘I’m okay.’

‘No, you’re not and it’s okay to feel that way. Richard digging up information about you must have brought up feelings about Mark, feelings you’re still trying to process.’

‘I still blame myself,’ Laura said, not quite believing she’d said those words out loud. But it was true. Mark’s mother blamed her, and a part of Laura’s soul still felt guilty.

‘You can stop right there. What happened to Mark was not your fault. It just happened. And what Richard did, again, that’s not on you. That’s on him. You have every right to keep your life private.’

‘I know you’re right, but sometimes it’s hard when you feel the world’s against you.’

‘Oh honey, the world’s not against you. It just feels that way sometimes, and anyway, I’ve always got your back.’

Laura smiled, her heart lifting a little at her sister’s kind words.

‘It’s okay to be happy. You know that, right?’ Lottie said.

‘Yeah, yeah, I know.’

‘I’m being serious, because I really think you need to know that and believe it, and I don’t mean with a man. Be happy with yourself first and then, if you think Richard deserves your forgiveness, then maybe with him. But you deserve to be happy, for you.’

‘Thank you.’ Laura tried not to cry past the burning in her throat.

‘Can I just say one more thing?’

Laura nodded, then laughed quietly as her sister couldn’t see her. ‘Sure.’

‘I think you need to put yourself in his shoes,’ Lottie said. ‘Just for a moment. His grandmother is ill. As you know, she is dying. He doesn’t know this, but he knows she probably doesn’t have long left. She brought him up, was a mother to him. He lost his wife to cancer and is bringing up his son on his own while working full time.’

‘You do listen to what I tell you,’ Laura said, her tone light.

‘Ha ha, very funny. Anyway, he has all of this stuff going on in his life and then you come along and turn his ordered world upside down.’

‘I wouldn’t put it quite like that,’ Laura said.

‘You came along and shook things up. Breathed new life into the home. Gertie befriends you, trusts you, yet he knows nothing about you. Just think about it. You’re a single woman who moved from the city to a tiny village in the middle of nowhere to work at a care home, when you are a trained nurse. He knows nothing about your past, your history. What would you think?’

Laura muttered under her breath. Damn her sister. Why did she always have to be right about these things?

She said nothing.

‘I know that you care about him,’ Lottie said, her voice low and gentle, trying to coax the truth from her.

‘No, I don’t.’

‘Laura, of course you do, otherwise you wouldn’t be so upset.’

Laura squeezed her eyes shut and pinched the bridge of her nose. Lottie was meant to make things simpler, not confuse the situation even more.

‘Just pick up the phone and talk to him. Life is too short, Laura. Surely you know that.’

It was true, life was short. Could she forgive him and move on? The answer was so simple. She would have to forgive him, for Gertie’s sake.

Laura said her goodbyes and stared at her phone screen. She would phone him now. While she had the courage to do so. It would be easier than talking to him face to face.

But as she started to scroll for his number, her mobile rang.

It was Richard.

She took a deep breath and answered the call.

* * *

Gertie rested her head back on the pillow and closed her eyes. A feeling of great calm washed over her. She had been worried for a little while, she didn’t mind admitting that, but everything now seemed to be resolved and back on track.

The pair of them could be so stubborn. They needed their heads bashing together. But all was coming good.

It would all work out in the end.

She could see the future so clearly in her mind.

He would no longer be alone, or unhappy, or feel that he had failed Henry in some way.

He now had someone to share that future with.

A weight had been lifted.

It was time.