Howl (Monster Boyfriends #1)

Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

RAEGAN

G oing back to the bookstore on Monday morning feels like going back to school after being out for a long break. Typically, I would be excited to see my friends and catch up with various members of town, but I find myself wishing I could stay at home with Jamie in the little bubble we’ve made.

Exploring the way our bodies work together and crave one another has been equally fascinating and exhilarating. I’ve found it’s very easy to lose myself memorizing the lines of every muscle and tracing every inch of his skin. Besides the occasional need for food and water, I think I’d be perfectly fine never leaving the bed.

The mate bond is just like Jamie described: being near him empowers me to do things I’ve never done before, want things I’ve never wanted. He’s like a drug, and no temptation on earth could lure me away from him. It’s almost dizzying, the way he affects my senses. Everything looks brighter, tastes sweeter, and—

And now Ethan is staring at me like I snorted a line of sugar.

“Good morning,” he greets me warily.

“Good morning, Ethan! How are you this gorgeous fall morning?”

I’ve always been pleasant first thing in the morning, but I must have turned it up a notch too high based on the way he’s raising his brow at me.

Oh, no. Do I have a post-orgasm glow? Is it that obvious?

“Fine,” Ethan drones. “I take it your cheery attitude means you’re ready to get back to work?” He suggests this with an expectant tone, and with sudden guilt, I realize my week-long absence meant leaving Ethan alone to open and close the store himself. Bound and Buried employs a handful of part-time workers, but typically Ethan and I split the managerial duties. It’s not like me to be so inconsiderate, but this past week truly has thrown me off my game.

“Absolutely,” I tell him. “Where do you want me to start?”

He points absentmindedly to a plastic bin sitting in front of the register labeled FALL DECOR. “Might as well start with the window display.”

My mood skyrockets at the prospect of spending the morning decorating the three pane window looking out onto Main Street. It’s been one of my favorite parts of the job. I would’ve thought the task would be finished by now, most likely handed off to one of the part-time employees, because the rest of town was decorated for fall weeks ago.

I go to the back office and put away my bag and the cozy cardigan I’ve been wearing. When I come back out, I grab the plastic bin and carry it closer to the window. Then a thought occurs to me: Did Ethan purposefully postpone decorating the window until I got back?

Now that would be ridiculous. Ethan knows how much I love being in charge of the window display, but he’s never been that considerate, nor has he ever been kind to me after needing time off. But he was the one who offered it to me.

Shrugging it off, I spend the next few hours filling the space with color like it’s an empty canvas. I string paper sunflowers around the edge of the window sill, plaster cling-on pumpkins to the glass, and line the bottom of the sill with straw. Then I take my time creating pretty stacks of Halloween-themed books that line the bottom of the windows. I tie a few together with twine and stick them in baskets with fake sunflowers. With a few extra pumpkins sprinkled here and there, I’m pretty sure my task is complete, so I go outside to take a look.

The display is perfect. The colors and textures just scream fall, and at night, the added touch of fairy lights will make it even better.

I’m admiring my work when I hear my name being called by a familiar voice. I turn to see Jo walking briskly down the street holding a cup of coffee in each hand, holding one out to me when she approaches.

“I had to come into town for dog food and thought I’d stop by,” she says. “The window looks great!”

“Thanks!” I’m beaming at the combination of admiring my creativity and seeing Joanna again so soon.

Getting to talk with Jo this weekend about my conflicting feelings for Jamie was an outlet I hadn’t known I needed, and seeing her again only reminds me how happy I am that she reached out in the first place.

Jo quirks a brow at me, just like Ethan did before. “What’s got you so happy this morning?”

I shrug my shoulders and feign nonchalance. “I’m having a good day.”

She glances at her watch. “It’s only ten A.M.”

“Okay,” I concede, “it’s been a good two hours.”

Jo’s eyes light up like a Christmas tree, and she clamps her hand dramatically over her mouth, suppressing a squeal.

I know exactly what she thinks she’s figured out, so very calmly, I try to defuse the situation without drawing attention.

What is it about the front of this store that makes people want to cause a spectacle?

“It’s not what you think,” I tell her hastily.

She points directly at my lying face. “You decided to take a test drive, didn’t you?”

I draw up short, because yes, I most definitely did. But I don’t want the rest of Main Street to know that.

“Would you get over here?” I usher her into the store where the remnants of my decorating spree are strewn around the window and on the floor. Ethan is standing at the front counter and staring at me blankly, so I take that as a hint that I need to clean up before more customers arrive.

“Here,” I say, handing Jo a wad of my paper scraps, “help me with this and I’ll tell you everything.”

She does so without question, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet while we clean up the rest of my mess. We toss everything back into the original bin and I close the lid. Nodding to the back of the store, I tell Jo that I’ll be right back.

I put the bin in its proper place, and when I come back out to the floor, I tell Ethan I’m going to take a short break, and he miraculously doesn’t argue. He just nods curtly and continues whatever he is doing.

Odd. Maybe he is trying to be kind to me today.

Jo and I sit on a bench outside tucked between the bookstore and Claudia’s bakery. She hands me back my cup of coffee that I forgot about, and I take it happily. Taking a sip, I realize it’s a pumpkin spice latte, but the cup says it’s from Double Double.

“What is this? Jamie doesn’t sell anything with pumpkin spice.”

Jo smiles at me knowingly. “He does now.”

“What made him change his mind?”

She pretends to think really hard, rubbing her chin and squinting her eyes. “Let’s see. Perhaps it has to do with what you were about to tell me earlier. You know, about you deciding to have a little fun together.”

She nudges me in the side playfully, and I cave. “Okay. Yes. We moved to second base.”

“Second base?” she grimaces. “You’re gonna have to be more specific. I don’t play sports.”

Jo waits with bated breath as I take a sip of my latte and mutter the words. “He used his mouth this time.”

“Girl, use your words.”

Though I’ve found my courage when I’m alone with Jamie, it’s still awkward for me to talk about these things openly for some reason. I’ve never felt confident when it comes to sex.

I try again. “He went down on me. You know, he performed oral.”

Joanna raises an eyebrow. “You know that’s third base, right? But forget about that, how was it?”

Part of me wants to keep the intimate details of what’s happened between me and Jamie to myself, but I don’t see any harm in sharing the basic overview.

“It was…amazing.” I sigh like a lovestruck schoolgirl, and I realize just how smitten I really am. “I was a little nervous at first, but I just went with my gut like you said, and it wasn’t awkward or bland at all. I don’t think I’ve ever connected to someone like that sexually before. And we haven’t even had sex yet.”

Jo gasps in mock horror. “You didn’t take him for a full test drive?”

“Stop,” I tease. “I tested several of the features, and I’m definitely interested.”

“Well, well, well. Look at you. I have to say, as soon as I saw you up close, I could see a glow about you.”

“Ugh, I knew it,” I groan. “Everyone can tell, can’t they?”

She hums thoughtfully. “Not always, but with you it’s pretty obvious.”

I lean my head back against the brick wall of the building and fake a cry.

“Don’t worry,” Jo says, perfunctorily patting my leg. “Maybe with the festival coming up, everyone will be so busy they won’t notice two of Shadow Hills’ resident B.F.F.s are finally fucking.”

“Jo!”

She stands up abruptly and begins walking backwards away from the bench. “Gotta go get that dog food,” she redirects the conversation. “Keep me posted on which bases you hit next.”

She swings an imaginary bat then turns around and heads across the street, leaving me speechless and considering texting Jamie to ask what time he takes lunch.