I Won’t Be In On Monday (The Annoying Hot Bosses Club #3)

Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

J uniper

"Hey, Lila. Hey, Skye," I wave as I enter the small coffee shop and head over to my friends. They both beam at me as I make my way, and once again, I'm thankful for having them both in my life. "Thanks for meeting me on such short notice. I know you probably had plans, but I'm so annoyed and didn't really have anyone else to talk to." My best friend, Poppy, is currently working as an English teacher, and we always have to schedule phone and Zoom dates well in advance to ensure we are both free.

"Hey, we're friends," Lila says as she stands up and gives me a hug. I hug her back, grateful for her support and sweet words. "We are always going to be here for each other. What's going on, Juniper?"

"I’m just feeling low," I admit as I sit down. Sometimes it's hard for me to admit the thoughts in my head aren't always as positive as I want them to be. I love my life, for the most part, but there is something missing. There’s always been something missing, and now that I have an unrequited crush on Remington, I feel my singleness and loneliness that much more.

"Oh, no, I'm sorry." Skye leans forward and grabs my hand. "What's wrong? What happened?"

"I had a weird morning with Remington, and I really need to nominate him as the president of the Annoying Bosses Association. I just can’t stand him.”

“Oh, no. What did he do?" Skye asks in a low voice as if she's scared he'll show up and hear us talking about him.

"He's just the most frustratingly annoying man I've ever met in my life."

Lila presses her lips together and looks over at Skye with a knowing look. "Are you going to tell us what happened?"

"So, you guys know he has a kid, right?" I pause and take a deep breath, wondering how he and said kid are getting along. I slightly regret not going to the office with him because I really want to see him interact with his daughter. I want to see if he will soften when he sees his little girl. Or if he'll go all stiff and awkward.

"Yes." Skye nods, her lips pursed. "They're meeting today, right?"

"Yeah, this afternoon.Anyway, he called me last night so that I could go over to his place to help him clean out his spare bedroom to get it ready for his daughter. I already had plans with my dad, but I didn't say no. I wanted to be nice. So, I go over there and spend my entire morning and some of the afternoon cleaning out this room, and well... let's just say that he's a jerk."

"What did he do?" Skye asks. "Oh, shit. Did he make a move on you?"

"Worse." I groan.

Lila's eyes widen. "Did he pull out his penis and ask you to suck it?"

"What? No." My jaw drops, and I can't stop a giggle from escaping at the thought. "He's a ladies’ man, but he doesn't see me in that way."

"He sure is a ladies’ man." Lila nods. "All the partners are." She giggles. "They really think they are the George Clooney and Brad Pitt of the legal world."

"They are all kinda cute," I admit. I don't really want my friends to know that I have a thing for Remington, but I can't pretend that I don't think he's super hot. “I know he really thinks he's all that. I mean, he is the ultimate ladies' man. He has a different woman every night of the week. But no, he would never ask me to suck his dick because I am just a plain Jane that nobody ever notices."

Skye makes a face and frowns. "Why would you say that?"

"Because it's true. Remington Parker doesn't even know I exist as a woman."

"Are you upset at that?" Lila asks softly.

"I'm not upset. I'm just frustrated. I overheard him on the phone with some lady who wanted to see him tonight, and he was basically telling her that she had nothing to worry about when it came to his assistant because his assistant was the last woman in the world he would even glance at. That just makes me feel amazing, you know?" I adjust my glasses on my face and sigh. "I'm just fed up with being invisible. I'm fed up with being the woman that everyone calls to help them do something but who no one ever wants to take out, except for my dad because he has no life. I don't want to end up like my dad. I don't have kids. It would just be me." I bite down on my lip guiltily. "I mean, I love my dad, but I want more than just him in my life." I shrug. "But no man ever feels that way about me."

Skye leans forward. "Well, we're ready to give you that makeover whenever you want. You're gorgeous in an understated way. We just need to highlight your beauty, and the men will be all over you.”

“I’m ready. I mean, I just want to change something in my life, you know? I never had a mom to show me makeup or anything. I tried some YouTube tutorials, and I ended up looking like a witch. Maybe I put on too much black eyeliner. I don't know." I shrug. "But I'd be really grateful for you girls' help. I really want to meet a guy. I really want to show Remington Parker that I have a life. I'm not just going to drop everything to help him with his kid." I bite down on my lip again. "Though, I do wonder how it's going."

"He already picked her up, right?" Skye asks.

"Yeah." I nod. "I thought maybe he would call and beg me for help, but I haven't heard a word from him." I’m slightly disappointed at that. I kind of liked the fact that I was the one that he called for help, even if it didn't really mean anything.

"I have an idea," Lila says. "Why don't we go to an open mic poetry slam tonight and let out our feelings, and then let's make a plan for the makeover next week?"

"A poetry slam? I didn't know you write poetry." I look at her in surprise.

"I'm not. But you're a writer, right?"

"I don't write poetry, and I certainly don't do poetry slams." I shudder and think about my book and how Remington reacted as I told him the plot. He genuinely seemed to enjoy it, and it made me excited to go home and write more. It inspired me to figure out where the book was going so I could tell them more and see what he thought.

"It'll be fun, I think." Skye says. "Shall we go? Do you have anything else to do?"

"Well, I was thinking after this drink I would..." I pause. "You know what? Let's do it. I mean, I might suck, but it's not like I know anyone there, right?"

"Exactly." Lila giggles. "And you know what? I'll say a poem, too.”

“You will?” I ask in surprise.

“I mean, let’s all three of us perform. We all have to sign up.”

Skye makes a face. “I don’t want to. I don’t have a poetic bone in my body.”

“We’re actresses.” Lila stares at her. “We can fake something.”

“True,” Skye says, tossing her red hair. “Fine. Shall we go?”

“Maybe after one more drink,” I say. “Or two. Do you guys know where we’re going?”

“I know just the place.” Lila grins.

Four drinks and two shots later, we walk into Arkansas Slow Brewery, and a crowd of hipsters with dreadlocks, plaid shirts, and hand-sewn clothes surrounds us. I feel totally out of my element, yet I’m glad to be experiencing something new.

"Welcome," the doorman nods as he gazes at us. "Can I see your IDs, please? It's going to be a five-dollar cover."

"This is where you have the poetry slam, right?" Lila asks as she pulls out her ID.

"Yeah, ma'am. Sign-ups will be at the bar. We'll start in about fifteen minutes."

"Great. All three of us are going to sign up."

He looks at her and then at Skye and then at me. "Sounds good. That's going to be fifteen dollars, please."

"I'll pay for everyone," Lila says, pulling out a fifty. "Keep the change." He stares at her and just nods.

"He could've said thank you," I whisper as we head inside, and Lila shrugs.

"He's probably upset we didn't give him more money."

"Really?" I ask.

"I don't know." She giggles. "But this is New York City, so I would believe anything."

"Yeah, true." I look around in surprise to see how packed it is. There is a group of younger males with long hair and Mohawks talking about Kant’s philosophy, and I just stare at a grinning Lila. “I feel so out of my element,” I admit. “What will I even talk about?”

“Remington.” She grins. “No one’s going to know that you’re talking about your boss.”

“I guess,” I say. “But maybe I won’t do a poem about Remington. I feel kind of weird talking about him in a public space like this. I mean, between us, it’s fine, but...”

“Stop stressing, Juniper,” Skye says. “It’s cool. I mean, Kingston knows I complain about him all the time.”

“Yeah, and so does Max,” Lila giggles. “They think it’s funny.”

“I suppose they would think it’s funny because they love you. However, Remington and I are very much employer and employee, and there is no sexual chemistry or love there. If he ever finds out I’m talking shit about him, I’m fired, and I kind of need this job right now.”

“No one’s going to tell him. I’m not going to tell him,” Skye says. “Are you going to tell him, Lila?”

“Never. Come on, let’s sign up.” We all sign up and grab pear martinis and find seats. The smell of weed fills my nostrils, and I feel like I'm beginning to get a contact high, though my nerves are fraught when I hear a woman with bright blue hair and several nose rings calling my name. I stand up slowly, heart racing, and head towards her.

"Let's welcome Ms. Juniper to the stage," she says with a grin. "You've got five minutes. When you see the light blinking at the back, that's your twenty-second warning. Got it?"

"Yup, I think so."

"Here you go, Ms. Juniper." She hands me the mic, and I take it from her, wondering if I've lost my mind. I am so far out of my comfort zone, it's not funny. "The stage is yours."

I stare out at the sea of eyes staring up at me, and the stage starts swaying slightly. I am nervous I'm going to faint.

What am I doing? I think to myself. I stare at Skye and Lila as they gaze up at me. I can see they're smiling at me, waiting patiently. Skye offers me a huge thumbs-up, and I take a deep breath. “So, I'm not normally a poet," I start, "but my friends thought I should try it out tonight." I wait for the crowd to clap or cheer me on, but everyone just stares at me wordlessly. Fuck... this is not going well.

"You can do it, Juniper," Skye shouts out, and Lila claps. I smile at them gratefully.

"So, I’ve got this boss. He’s not good at loss.” I groan at my crappy poetry. It’s not starting very well. I take another deep breath and close my eyes. I think of Remington and of myself, and then I think of everything that's going on in my life. "Some people look at me, they just see a lady in glasses. But I'm more than these thick black glasses. I got a brain inside. I got a brain that thinks, a brain that drinks, a brain that wants to be seen. A brain that wants me to be a queen." I clear my throat and blink as I stare at the crowd. There has to be at least thirty people sitting here, and I swallow hard.

I can tell I'm bombing. I should not be on this stage. I don't fit in here. I'm not a poet. I'm not talented in spoken word. I feel like a loser. Then I look down at Skye and see the proud smile on her face, and I look over at Lila, and she's nodding and clapping. I realize that even if they're the only two that like what I have to say, it's enough. I clear my throat and start again.

"I was walking down the street one day, and this man called out to me and said, ‘Hey, lady, you got a loaf of bread?' And I stared at him, about to say no, because who walks around with that sort of glow?” I pause as my brain processes what I just said. It didn’t make sense. “Then I looked him in the face, and he was sad, and I couldn't be mad because all he wanted was some food to eat. And I was just walking down the street with worries in my head, but I still had a warm bed. I had somewhere to go, even if I was super slow." Some people laugh then, and I don't know if they're laughing with me or at me.I shrug off the fact that I know I’m bombing. I’m doing this for the experience, and that is all that matters.

"Sometimes I think that my life is so bad, and then I realize that I've got a lot to be glad about because, even though I don't have clout, I have a job, and I have a boss. And even though he doesn't know that if he didn't have me, he'd be at a loss, I know that he couldn't live without me. He couldn't be without me. And even if it's only because of the work that I do, I know I’ve got a clue. So don't look at these glasses or at these baggy pants and think you know what I'm about. Because under these clothes is a woman who knows that she's got clout."

I point my finger to the sky. "I can change these clothes. I can change this flow. I can change the way I speak, but you can't change my brain, and I don't want you to, because I'm the sort of girl that would be good to you. I'm the sort of girl that may not have a man, but maybe that's the plan, until I find a Dan that's good to me, that works for me, that loves me. And it may not be my boss. It may not be he who understands what a loss it is to not have me in his life. But it doesn't matter, because I ain't no home slice."

I pause and see someone laughing, and I know I will never do this again. "Thank you," I say, wrinkling my nose as I hurry off the stage. I want to groan out loud. Half of what I said didn’t make sense, but it doesn't even matter because I’ve realized something more important than anything else. I realized that I had true friends. Ride-or-die friends. Friends that would always be there for me. I always had Poppy, of course, but she wasn’t even in the country right now. I hurriedly sit next to Lila and Skye, who are chanting my name, and I can't stop myself from grinning. "How bad was I?" I say, but they start stomping their feet and clapping.

"That was so cool, Juniper. You really seemed to come alive." Skye looks at me in admiration. "You're amazing."

"I don't know about amazing, but while I wouldn't do it again, I did feel a slight exhilaration. I'm not exactly Emily Dickinson or William Wordsworth, but it was cool. Thank you for encouraging me and being here for me."

"You're welcome." Skye grasps my hand. "We're a crew, you know?"

"Yeah, we are.” I nod happily.

“So, I have to ask you this," Lila says, leaning forward. "Are you interested in Remington?"

"No. Why would you ask me that?" I blush.

"I don't know, because you've made several comments saying that you didn't mind that he didn't notice you. And I’m just wondering if that is something that you are hoping to happen."

"No, of course not," I say quickly. "I’m just..."

"Juniper, you're speaking to us," Skye says with a grin. "We are currently in relationships with our bosses at the same law firm. So, if that's something you want to make happen, then just..."

"No," I say quickly. "Trust me, Remington is a playboy, and I don't want my first real relationship to be with a playboy. Plus, he's got so much on his mind. He's a dad, and that is his..." I pause. "It's just complicated. Plus, he doesn't even look at me like that. I don't even think he realizes I'm a woman."

"Oh, he realizes," Skye says. "You're gorgeous, Juniper. I know that you think guys can't look past the glasses and the distinct attire you wear, but anyone who really looks at you can see that you're a stunning beauty."

"You're sweet," I say, "but I know when I look in the mirror, I'm definitely not seeing the next catwalk model or actress or singer or anything other than a dowdy librarian. But, I'm ready to change this image. I want to stun some random man. I want to have my choice of bad boys." I laugh. "Not that I actually want a bad boy, but you know, I want them to want me."

"I know," Lila says. "You want to have the attention so that you feel like you're finally being seen."

I nod. "Exactly. I don't think that's too much to ask, right?"

"Not at all," Skye says. "And we will make it happen. You, my dear Juniper, are about to become the belle of the ball. I just hope you're ready for the ride."

"Trust me," I say, grinning at them both, "I have been ready for this ride my whole life, and I've also been ready for the ball. So, please, let me know where we're going as soon as I have this makeover, because I want to flirt and dance and sing and have the time of my life."

"I think we can arrange that," Skye says with a nod. "In fact, I think there's a major A-list party happening in a couple of weeks, and it’s themed. We can all dress up super sexy, and you can get your flirt on with the most eligible men in the city."

"That sounds cool," I nod. "I'm ready for a change in my life. I'm ready to be something and someone other than dependable ol’ Juniper. I am ready to meet a man whose jaw drops to the ground when he meets me." I don't tell them that I want that man to be Remington Parker. I don't tell them that I want to make him really see me. I'm not sure why. It's not because I don't trust them. I think it's because I'm too embarrassed to tell them. Maybe it's because I'm pretty sure that even after the makeover, he still won't notice me.