It’s Always Us (Abandoned Brothers #3)

Epilogue

LEX

Three Months Later

I stand just behind the white rope, rolling the stroller back and forth, and searching the field for number four. The tall, dark-haired one that can make my heart race with that sly, sexy smirk.

“Hey, I see him,” Bree points as she jumps, spotting Mark.

We watch him warm up, tossing a ball to a trainer. Flashes of him in the middle of a much smaller stadium with thousands of fewer fans zip through my mind. Same guy, but the man on this field and I share a life. We’re more than best friends and lovers. He’s my partner. The father of our girls. The one I’ll spend the rest of my life loving up close. I’ll never take it for granted, knowing exactly what it’s like to not be with the one who owns my heart.

He jogs toward us, removing his helmet and holding it at his side.

He grabs my face, kissing me as if we’re the only two in the stadium, not caring in the slightest that there are people and cameras surrounding us.

“For getting lucky,” he says, grinning like he has a secret.

“You’ve never needed luck.”

His lips move close to my ear. “Baby, I’m not talking about the game.” I shove him, and his grin creeps even higher. He bends down and scoops Bree into a big bear hug. “All right, Breezy. I expect to hear you all the way down here, and when we get home tonight, we’re finishing those next two slides. ”

Bree high-fives him. They’ve been working on a comic strip about a brother-sister duo who save kids from the monsters in their closets. I hear them laughing and carrying on through the house, and it’s helped Bree adjust to all the changes.

She’s fallen right in with Maggie and Shane’s crew like they’ve known each other forever. We help her write letters to Linda and make sure that she gets the ones her mom sends back. The stability of having a permanent place to call home and her own room and space has helped her settle in.

“Give me my girls.” Mark lifts Peyton out of the stroller, and I hand over Ellie as he beams like the proudest man on the planet.

He turns toward every camera, snapping away, kissing both of their chubby cheeks as they smile and coo. The man has always known how to play it up, but this is just Mark in dad mode. It’s as if this is truly what he was born to do. It’s obnoxious, and I love every second of it.

He kisses one and then the other as he hands them back to me, pressing his lips to mine. “See you in a couple of hours.”

I smile. “I’ll be there.” Being here when the game is over might not seem like a big deal to some, but to Mark and me, it’s everything.

He jogs away, and I put the babies in the stroller. Bree and I make our way through the stadium and up to the box to join Shane, Maggie, and the kids. When we get there, Bree joins the boys in the seats outside, screaming and yelling as the Big Horns take the field.

Shane scoops up Ellie with one arm, holding his guy in his other, and takes off as I release Peyton from her seat.

“Have you ever seen men more thrilled to have babies in their arms than these dudes?” Maggie says, watching him juggle the two.

I laugh. “I’m pretty sure Mark works the girls into every interview just to make sure everyone knows he’s a dad.”

Maggie rubs her stomach as she sips a Sprite. “Shane’s practicing the double hold. He’s been counting down the days until he could punch them in the face with us having number two.”

“You’re pregnant? Congratulations!” I slide my free arm around her shoulders and squeeze. “Thanks a lot. Now, Mark will be all over me about number three,” I tease .

“We need Andie here. We’ve got to set these men straight that we will not literally be birthing a football team. If Shane had it his way, I’d never not be pregnant.”

“I’m down for whatever kind of intervention we need to have.” I laugh. “Mark is convinced he makes nothing but multiples.”

“Well, I know Andie will join. She’s barely sleeping with their two, and with this being Sean’s last season, she said he’s pre-planning for a celebratory number three. I’m calling the group home to find out what kind of cocktail they were feeding these nutballs.”

“I think Mark got a double dose,” I say, following her to join Shane and the kids.

The coin is tossed, the ball is punted, and Mark jogs out on the field to take charge and call plays.

I spend the next two hours swapping and feeding fussy babies while keeping my eyes glued to the field and Mark. Our group is loud and often on their feet, but I watch calmly and quietly, savoring every moment of the whole experience and getting to be a part of it.

With one minute and twenty-three seconds on the clock, Mark kneels and sets up to kneel a second time, ending the game. He pulls off his helmet and searches for our box, and when he spots us, his fist moves to his chest just like he did after every high school game. My hand finds my heart in return.

Like a mob, we move through the stadium. At an exit, I part ways with Maggie, Shane, and the kids. Bree was happy to join them and get a head start on the after-party, which will involve streaming Sean and Cole’s games. I continue to weave through the crowd with the stroller, eventually showing my badge to get into the family waiting area.

With both girls sleeping, I roll the stroller back and forth, hoping their much-needed nap isn’t disturbed. It’s not long before players filter in. Mark strolls through the doors with a grin plastered to his face wearing a pink T-shirt that says ‘Girl Dad.’ This man is so into fatherhood I can’t help but think about doing it again with him . . . someday.

His shirt is tight across his chest. His jeans are just the right amount of fitted. His hair is a little messy, but it’s the look in his eyes that has me biting my lip and holding my breath .

What Maggie said rolls through my mind, and I can’t help but laugh as he bends to pick me up, lifting me off the ground. I wrap my legs around him, pressing my forehead to his.

“You know, I’ve been waiting for this moment for nine years.”

I link my arms around his neck. “Oh, yeah? I think I’ve thought about it a time or two. You did good out there.”

One eyebrow arches up. “That so?” I nod, holding his gaze. “It’s never meant more to me than it did today.” His eyes move to the stroller, checking on the girls, and then back to me. “You being here. Our family. Our life. Everything you’ve given me.” He pauses, staring so deeply into my eyes I have to swallow. “It matters so much more than this, but thank you for allowing me to do both.”

“I love you,” I whisper, suddenly overwhelmed with so much joy it creeps up my throat and into my eyes. I nuzzle into his neck as tears drip from my eyes.

His hands grip my thighs. “Baby, I know. I feel it every day.” His lips find mine, soft and sweet, but when I pull away, his smirk promises more to come.

He sets me down, and I link my hand with his as he grabs the stroller.

“Nice shirt.”

He smiles, lifting my hand and pressing his lips to the back of it. “The reporters dug it.”

I laugh, stepping closer and wrapping my free hand around his forearm as we make our way out of the stadium. “Of course they did. I bet the ladies loved it, too.”

Ugh. That grin. It kills me every time.

MARK

I lay Ellie in her crib gently, hoping she’ll stay asleep this time. These girls are spoiled being rocked every night, but I don’t care. I’m rocking them until they fall asleep, and maybe even longer.

Lex might kill me as the season picks up, and she has trouble getting them down, but I’ll suffer her wrath for this time with my girls. Making them feel safe and loved as they go to sleep is something I never had. I will do this for as long as I can.

I let the white noise machine work its magic as I close the door. Down the hall, I peek in on Bree. She’s sound asleep after a long night of dance classes that are quickly filling up our evening schedule. Dance is giving her what football has always given me. Freedom. An escape. A space to let all the pain and hurt go.

I turn off her lamp and brush her hair out of her face, hoping she knows how much Lex and I love having her here. She’s had to grow up quickly these past months, and she’s way more mature and adjusted than any ten year old should ever have to be.

I pull her door closed and march straight to the garage.

I open the door to Lex’s four-stall haven, where the Bronco sits jacked up off the floor. Country music plays low in the background, and Lex is on her back under the rear wheel well.

Metal clinks to the floor, and she groans. She scoots out from underneath and stands. Her hair is held back with a bandana, and she’s wearing a white tank and old jeans filled with holes. Damn . The sight reminds me exactly why I’m here.

“How’d it go?” She wipes her hands on a blue rag.

“Ellie needed extra Daddy time.”

She squats back down, peering underneath the truck again. “You’re getting nothing but silence when I’m up all night trying to get them to sleep.” She knows her silence is my Kryptonite, but I don’t care.

“I heard. I’m choosing to suffer the consequences. Your idle threats kind of turn me on.” I can hear her roll her eyes.

“Don’t forget Slade is coming out next weekend to help me.”

“Great,” I grumble. I like that guy, sort of, but I don’t have to like him working with Lex in this environment.

Her head swivels to peek at me over her shoulder. Her smile is blinding. “You’re gonna have to get over it. This little jealous streak you have about Slade. He’s like my brother.”

“Why isn’t he dating someone?”

She walks to me, her arms sliding through mine, propped on my hips. “Uh . . . maybe because he’s a jaded, old crab who had his big, crusty heart broken.”

“You make him sound like Mr. Krabs. ”

She laughs and presses her lips to mine. “He kind of is, but I need his help pulling the engine. I can’t wait to get this baby up and running.” She untangles herself and moves to the workbench to grab another tool. “Besides, McGowen’s Aston Martin is being delivered this week. He can help me get a head start on that.”

“When will there be space for my Mustang?”

Her back is to me, and she stills. The smile that creeps across my face that she can’t see says, ‘Gotcha!’

She slowly turns to face me, pulling her long blonde hair over one shoulder as her fingers find one earring. Twist. Stop. Twist. Stop.

Her bottom lip tucks between her teeth to hide a smile. “What do you know about Mustangs?”

I take a step toward her. “Hmmm. I know they’re fast and . . . wild.” I take another step closer, planning my attack. She crosses her arms over her chest as if it will deter me. “I know they can be flashy, but the insides are built to last.” One more step, and I slide my hands around to her lower back and grab her butt. “I know once tamed, they are loyal to a fault.”

Her head falls to the side. “Really? You know all that?”

“Yep.” My mouth moves to her neck, my teeth gently grazing her skin. “I did research. I also know that if you had to pick a car, that’s exactly what you’d choose.”

Her arms are still crossed, but she lets her head fall further to the side, giving me access, and I make my way to her collarbone. “You sound pretty confident. Are you sure about that?”

“I know you’d take adventure over boring any day.”

She shoves me back. “How do you know?”

“How do I know what?” I play innocent, which I suck at.

She glares. “You know exactly what I mean.” My ass-eating grin deepens as her eyes narrow further. “You know what this means.” She turns to grab a tool from the workbench.

“What?”

She spins back, pointing a long rachet at me. “I think it might be time for another tattoo.”

“Done. Now, get over here.”

She shakes her head, but that playful look in her eyes has my temperature spiking to a thousand degrees. “I need to see if I can get the midpipe off. ”

“Say that again?” I lift my chin, waiting.

She frowns. “What?”

“What you just said. Say. It. Again.” I dare her.

Her grease-covered hands move to her hips. “I need to get the midpipe off, or we won’t be able to pull the engine.”

I close the space. “I’ve warned you that watching you work is the hottest damn thing I’ve ever seen. The girls are all in bed and asleep. The clock is ticking until one of those little Daddy’s girls wakes up and needs me. So, we can do this the easy way, and you come with me willingly, or the hard way, and I will happily throw you over my shoulder and haul you straight to our bed. Your choice.”

She steps back, her arms moving to her chest again, looking defiant, and that was the wrong damn move.

I bend, folding her over my shoulder.

She laughs. “I didn’t even get a chance to vote.”

“Nope.” I stop at the workbench, letting her drop off her tool and rag. “You just had to go and look like you were going to challenge me. My last bit of patience wore off.”

I step into the house and pull off one of her work boots and the other, leaving them by the door. I storm down the hall to our room.

“I wasn’t aware you ever had patience.”

I finally reach the edge of the bed and let her down slowly, her body making full contact with mine. “Definitely not when it comes to this and what we are about to do.”

“Um . . . do I get to take a shower first?”

“Nope. After.”

Her baggy jeans hang low on her waist, and my fingers find the soft, bare skin. She sucks in a breath. I know exactly where she’s ticklish, and she fights not to laugh, her knee jetting up to put a little space between us. I snatch her back, not giving her a second to retaliate. I find the hem of her tank and pull it up and over her head.

Her hands slide underneath my shirt and slowly around to my back, pulling me close. Even a thin layer of cotton between us won’t do, so I swipe it off.

Her nose presses into my cheek as her lips move along my jaw, taking her sweet time. The tips of her fingers brush the small black script lettering over my ribs .

I pull back, forcing her to meet my eyes. “Your love . . . it makes me forget.” I rest my forehead against hers. “Nothing can ever erase it and . . . I don’t want it to. It brought me here . . . with you.”

Her eyes stare into mine as if she’s making sure it’s true. She blinks so quickly. “I loved you then . . . so much. But now . . . ”

“I know,” I whisper. And I do. I know because every day I see Bree, I know what she did for me. I feel it every time I watch her with our girls. When she’s waiting for me after a game, the pride in her eyes almost knocks me over. Because I know she’d do it all over again just the same, to give me a chance.

Her arms link around my neck, her body pressing against mine.

“I love you, and it won’t ever be enough,” I whisper.

Her hands move to the sides of my face, her thumb tracing the scar above my eyebrow. Remnants of the last blow, not even close to the worst of them, but symbolizing the end of one kind of darkness only to enter an entirely different kind. Until she came along.

“It was enough to last me eight years apart from you.” Her breath whooshes across my lips. “This . . . what we have, our family . . . it’s more than enough to last me a lifetime and beyond.”

I kiss her, no time for soft and slow. The heat in my belly roars as I toss her onto the bed and find the button on her jeans. Her hands glide over my skin, keeping me close.

Our mouths and tongues move in sync with practiced precision. I grip her waist, needing her.

She laughs, and I lean down to kiss her smiling mouth.

“You know, I was thinking.” My fingers push at her bra.

“Uh, oh.” Her hands move to the sides of my face, angling her mouth over mine, kissing me achingly slow. A distraction technique, maybe.

Not going to work. I brace myself above her. “Nice try.”

She smiles, biting her bottom lip. Damn her. I hold her wrists, making sure she knows I mean business.

“Don’t even say it, Mark,” she warns, but I’ve never been good with caution.

She pulls up, gently biting my lower lip. It’s another nice attempt to deter me .

“I was thinking . . . ” She closes her eyes, lying perfectly still. I kiss her just below her ear. “That.” Her cheek. “You.” My lips move over her skin. “Need that Mustang tattoo.”

Her eyes flick open.

I place kisses over her body with every shred of patience I can muster. My turn for torture. “Right . . . here.” My lips run along her ribs right underneath her heart. “Just a tiny one.”

She exhales slowly and smiles, one that pulls all the way to her eyes. “Maybe I should.”

“What’d you think I was going to say?” I know exactly what she thought, and it’s not that I’m not thinking it.

Her arms link around my neck, smashing my body to hers. “Don’t even pretend you’re not ready to give Sean and Shane a run for their money.”

I grin. “Oh, I am. But baby, I’m saving up for round two. I plan on practicing. A lot.” I brush my lips to hers. “Next time, I’m shooting for three.”

LEX

One Year Later

“Would you shut up?”

“Man, one more comment like that, and I’m burning yours to a crisp.” Mark points the metal spatula at Shane, turning back to the grill. He picks up right where he left off, singing Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’,” directed at Hank, the oldest of Maggie’s siblings that she and Shane have cared for.

I glance at him, and he looks like he’s one second away from ditching us and booking an early flight to London.

“Come on, man.” Mark is disturbed. “You’re Hank Matthews. The young David Beckham. Shit. You’d probably be a better quarterback. ”

“I told him,” Maggie says, standing. “But I think she’s dating that blockhead, who doesn’t know his right hand from his left, just to torture him since he WAS BLIND.”

“Seriously.” Hank’s face turns red.

“Steal the girl, man,” Mark interjects. “Find your play and make it.”

Shane points a baby spoon at Mark. “He doesn’t need your input.”

“I think he does. Look,” Mark points at me. “I slid in at sixteen, and I got the girl . . . forever. You can’t give up. This is your last chance. She’s going to be here, and you have to man up and do something about all this . . . ” Mark waves his wand around. “Pent up sexual tension.”

“I’m leaving.” Hank stands, shoving his chair away.

“You can’t leave.” Maggie steps in front of him, bouncing the newest member of our giant family. Little Quinn already has Shane wrapped around her pinky, and the rest of us aren’t any different. “This is your going away party.”

“Like hell, I can’t. I didn’t want a party, and you all are—”

There’s a loud commotion, and a parade of kids spews out onto the deck with Teddy in the lead, running toward the pool. I clutch the stack of plates just in time to keep them from crashing to the ground.

“Cannonball!!!!!” Teddy yells, taking a running leap.

Shane swings an arm out, snatching Aiden, and throws him over his shoulder like a wooden barrel. Sean and Andie bring up the rear with Ax and their little beauty, Lydia. Bree and Liv each have a hand on the girls waddling to the pool with their little diaper butts.

Sean retired after last season and is now the offensive coordinator for the Colorado Moose. He and Shane coach together, and we are all practically neighbors, which means there’s no privacy in this family.

Shane points at Hank. “Sit down. You will suffer through this one final time. Mark, not another word. He doesn’t need your input.”

“I’m just saying, it’s the eleventh hour. You’re leaving in a few days. You’ll miss your chance. Take it from me. Living without the one you love is like living with your chest gutted and everything inside spilling out.”

Mark swings his arm around me as I set another plate on the table and presses a kiss to my lips before returning to Master Griller.

Hank huffs. “Dude, she has a boyfriend, and no one is suffering. We’re friends. I’m leaving. ”

“That guy is an asshole,” Sean pipes in, putting Ax on his shoulders.

“Is he coming?” Andie asks. “I need to know. I might punch him.”

“Ugh, is he coming?” Maggie groans. “I’m texting Simone and asking. We didn’t invite his incapable, chauvinistic ass.”

“Firefly, if you want Hank to remain at his own party, let it be,” Shane says, stopping her.

Maggie glares at him but shoves her phone in her back pocket.

“Why isn’t anyone all up in Cole’s business?” Hank throws his hands in the air.

“Because he’s not here.” Half the group responds in unison and Hank drops back down into the chair, surrendering.

Maggie turns toward him. “Don’t worry. If he weren’t required to be at the Stingray’s camp, we’d be all up in his face about what’s actually happening in Miami.”

Hank groans. “You all seriously need to get a life. I can’t wait to get out of here.”

“But you are our life,” Andie sings sweetly.

“Hey,” Mark jumps back in. “You’re going to miss us when you’re on the other side of the world, realizing there’s no one that loves you like we do.”

This is my family. All of them, and I never want to be anywhere else.

When we aren’t cheering for Mark, we’re watching Shane and Sean coach the Moose, Hank’s soccer games, or Bree and Liv’s dance shows. Cole’s games are streamed at one house or another, which just so happen to be within five miles of each other. It’s football and sports and activities All. The. Time.

And when I have a little quiet time, I sneak away to the garage and work on whatever my current rusted-out project happens to be. I finish one, and Mark’s friends have another delivered. Restoring these old cars and trucks is everything I’ve dreamed of .

“Maybe you should spend your time worrying about that,” Hank points to the pool where Bree sits on the edge, laughing with one of Garrett’s friends.

All three men turn in that direction, and I watch Mark’s posture change from carefree to Captain America.

“Damn, man,” Sean whispers. “Here it goes. You’re gonna have fun with that. ”

Shane laughs, and Mark backhands him in the chest. “Laugh all you want, shithead. Liv’s right behind her, and she’s a lover of all lost things. You just wait and see who she brings home.”

Shane growls, “Mark, I’m one second from drowning you in the pool.”

Sean makes some kind of snorting noise and Shane’s head whips in his direction.

“Hold on, asshole. Lydia will be there before you know it.”

Maggie and Andie join me as we watch our men freak out about all of our girls’ future dating lives.

“People would pay to see this,” Maggie whispers.

Andie bumps our elbows. “We should video them and put it on YouTube.”

“What about the boys?” I ask, just wanting to see their reaction.

Three big heads swivel toward us.

“We’re not worried. They have the three of you,” Sean says like it’s a ridiculous question.

“Anyone who doesn’t run within the first three minutes of your unrelenting interrogation will get our vote of approval,” Shane adds.

“Besides, with the way Cole and Hank are going about things, there’s no need to worry,” Mark tosses in, eyeing Hank.

Hank stands, pulling a soccer ball off the side of the deck, and then joins the men’s little observation party. He rolls the ball between his hands. “If I knock that little shit in the pool, you all will get off my back about Sadie . . . for good. We’re friends, and that’s all we’ll ever be.”

“Deal.” All three guys approve.

“I’m not agreeing,” Maggie protests.

“Firefly,” Shane warns.

“Fine. I like Sadie enough to let it go. She’s smart and beautiful, and she’s the best babysitter we’ll ever find. But Hank, for the record, you’re a dumbass.”

Andie and I laugh as Hank drops the ball. With a swift kick, it smacks the kid in the back, and he tips forward just enough to fall into the pool.

All four men stand with their arms crossed over their chest in complete satisfaction, watching Bree’s eyes grow wide, laughter tumbling out of her.

“Nice aim, man,” Mark bumps him on the shoulder .

“I’ll have Teddy ready with the paintball gun while I’m gone.” Hank joins their protective stance.

They fall into conversation about all the ways in which they will torture future boys who start sniffing around.

“Oh, this is just the beginning, ladies,” Andie says. “I’m not sure who will drive us to the nut house first. All these kids or these men.”

“The men,” Maggie and I say.

“We already know these guys will take out any jackasses, but can you even imagine when one of these nutballs brings a girl home?” Maggie says as if the idea is unfathomable. “I mean, let’s be real. We got crazy lucky that we actually like each other, but what if we don’t like her?”

Andie and I look at each other. This is a revelation.

“That won’t happen, will it?” I ask, fully aware my list of female friends goes no further than what I can count on one hand, and two of them are beside me.

“What if one of them brings home a whiner?” Maggie cringes.

“Or someone who cries all the time?” Andie adds.

“Or isn’t capable of pumping her own gas?” They both look at me.

We survey the young males spread throughout the backyard that belong to us.

“Can we shoot them with paintballs if we don’t like them?” I ask.

“Well, I say since that one in there is a boy, it’s fair game for all of us.” Maggie points to my growing stomach.

“What’s fair game?” Mark asks, all three pairs of manly eyes on us.

“Just making sure there’s equal opportunity for the boys.”

Three sets of shoulders slump, and there’s a majority groan.

“You all need to behave yourselves and play nice.” Sean points at us.

“Don’t worry,” Maggie says, stepping toward Shane and sliding her arms around him.

“Yeah, right. I already know how you are with these boys.” Shane wraps his arm around her.

Sean slides behind Andie. “You have to be nice.”

Andie’s head tips back to look at him. “Why? If I were nice, you wouldn’t love me.”

He grins and kisses her forehead.

Mark eyes me, a sly smile awakening .

I join him next to the grill, and he swings his arm around my neck, pulling me against him.

“I’m one hell of a lucky man to get to see you get all protective over this little guy.” His hand runs over my stomach.

“Yeah, well, live it up. I think this is it, Casanova.”

His lips press against my ear. “I am. Every second.”

Me, too. I smile, watching our giant family. “Who knew you three abandoned boys would create this.”

There’s silence as we take in the absolute chaos happening before us.

“We did,” Mark says, with complete confidence as he fist-bumps each of his brothers. “And hell, we aren’t done yet.”

Maggie, Andie, and I groan while the beautiful men surrounding us laugh like this is what they’d planned all along.