Jackson (MC Sinners #7)

3 – Serenity

“ W hat happened to your face?”

Addison’s eyes widen as she stares across the table at me. I am bruised and battered, having taken more of a hit than I realized when I got into that fight. I bruise easily, so right now, it looks worse than it is.

Jackson and Spike sit down beside Addison, and I can see the moment that Jackson notices my face, too, because his eyes flash and a hard expression comes across his face. This is his biggest fear, and I knew that when they visited me today that he wouldn’t like what he saw.

I wasn’t going to cancel the visit, though.

This is the only chance I get to see them, and it’s the only thing that keeps me sane.

“I started it,” I answer Addison, even though I’m still looking at Jackson.

Our eyes are locked in an intense battle, one that nobody else can hear.

“Why would you start a fuckin’ fight?” he finally seethes.

I want to reach for him, to place my hand on his, to run my fingers over his face and breathe him in. I’ve missed him more than I ever thought possible, and knowing that I can’t see my daughter is equally as crippling. Sitting across from someone and not being able to put your hands on them is a form of torture.

I’m sure of it.

“It’s that or I get killed in here,” I say, my voice strong.

Last time he saw me, I was on the verge of breaking. This time, I’m doing my best to stay alive. To do that, I need to be strong.

“Startin’ fights is a way to get killed.”

Spike glances at Jackson, then interrupts before we can go any further. “Listen, we don’t have time. They’re goin’ to cut this visit short because there are two bikers in here. Let’s get to the point, yeah?”

I swallow and stare at Jackson, my heart aching on a level I didn’t think possible.

I want to tell him I love him, that he has to trust me, but none of it will make any difference to him. He hates me being in here, and it’s tormenting him in a way I’ll never understand. Not being able to protect me is his biggest fear. I wish I could take that away, but I can’t.

I can only survive.

“We’re goin’ to get you out,” Spike says, his voice so low I can barely hear him. “But to do that, we need inside help, as you no doubt already know.”

I knew they were coming up with a plan to get me out, and, of course, I knew it wouldn’t be legal. I’m not certain of the exact plan, but I have a feeling I’m about to find out.

“Can you tell me what the plan is?” I ask, my eyes moving over to the guard who is staring at another table, watching two women talking.

“We are goin’ to get someone on the inside to help. We’ll create a distraction outside the walls of the prison, something that will call every guard away. While that’s happening, someone on the inside is going to get you to the maintenance tunnels where you will come out. Once out, we have a plan to keep you safe until we can fix this.”

I blink at Spike, who just told me a rather elaborate plan.

“You’re kidding, right? I thought you meant you’d get me out by bringing Gerard down ...”

“Don’t have time for that,” Jackson murmurs. “We leave you in here much longer, you’ll die.”

I take a deep breath, knowing he’s probably right.

I will admit, it’s a plan that could work. It’s risky, sure, but it might actually be something we can pull off.

That is, if we can find someone willing to help.

“How are we going to find a guard who is willing to help?” I question.

“That’s on you,” Jackson tells me. “You give us names; we find out who has a past we can use against them.”

Xander comes to mind, but I feel bad for throwing his name out there. He helped me in my time of need, and I like him, but he also would be the only guard I could think of that might help. A jagged past isn’t something I can guarantee he has, though.

“There is one guard you could try and look into. His name is Xander. I don’t know his last name, but he’s young and he’s really friendly.”

Spike nods. “We’ll see what we can find out. Until then, you need to lay low. Keep out of trouble. We don’t need any extra attention being brought to you.”

If only it were that easy.

Jackson’s jaw is tight as he continues to stare at me. He’s angry that I’ve been in a fight, and I feel horrible about it, but I also know what I need to do to get through.

“Other than that, are you okay?” Addi asks.

I nod. “I’m okay. I have a few people now who help me. Is Ava okay?”

Saying her name has my heart clenching.

I miss her so much it makes me feel sick to my stomach.

If it wasn’t for her, I probably wouldn’t accept this plan.

Right now, I’ll do anything to hold her in my arms again.

“She’s great.” Addi smiles, warmly. “She’s as crazy as you are, babbling all the time, and she is obsessed with pulling my hair.”

I laugh, but that laugh quickly turns to tears, unstoppable tears. They hit me like a freight train and without warning. I press a hand to my mouth and stare down at the table as drop after drop splatters onto it. I miss her. I miss him. I want to go home.

“Hey,” Jackson says, his voice low. “Baby, look at me.”

I look up at him, and I see now, his eyes are soft.

“We will get you out of here.”

“I hate that I can’t see her,” I croak. “That I can’t touch you ...”

“Won’t be long,” Spike assures me. “Got to trust us.”

I do trust them.

That’s not what scares me.

What scares me is remaining here and something happening before I can get out.

What if I never see my daughter again?

HOUND’S LACKEYS EYES follow me as I move to sit beside Mama. She has invited me over to her group of ladies and made sure that they all know to take care of me. They automatically took me in, based purely on her word alone. They respect her, and so do I. That doesn’t mean I feel safe, though.

But Hound’s girl is there, she’s always there.

Watching.

Grinning.

Tormenting me.

He’s going to make a move, and he’s going to do it soon.

I’m afraid of how bad that might be.

“He won’t touch you here,” Mama assures me, patting my hand before taking a bite of the sloppy mashed potato on her plate. “You have to watch your back, though. Hound is sly, and he has a lot of people on his side.”

I nod, moving my gaze to the girl I started a fight with. She isn’t looking at me, but I know she’s probably going to retaliate, too. I can only hold my head high and pray that it’s enough for them to believe I can handle it.

Xander stands by the door—he is on duty tonight. His arms are crossed, but when our eyes meet, he offers me a small smile. Yeah, he’s one of the good ones alright, and the problem with that is that I worry he has nothing the club can use against him to have him help me.

I don’t like the idea of blackmailing him.

“He’s a good guard,” Mama murmurs, watching where I’m staring. “Keep him in your corner.”

I turn to face her. “I’m on yard duty this afternoon. I’m concerned being out there because it’s a lot less protected. I heard sometimes they mix the males and females out in the yard?”

Mama’s eyes flash, and she frowns. “They do, and Hound is always in the yard. If he has it his way, he’ll make sure you’re out there together.”

My heart skips a beat.

I swallow. “How do I avoid him?”

“Stay near the guards. If you see him coming, do something, anything, to get yourself away from him. I don’t care if you have to throw a punch at another inmate, don’t let him near you.”

My food lodges in my throat at the thought of having to start a fight just to protect myself.

It’s sad that’s my only option.

“Keep your chin up. Mama pats my hand. “Don’t let him smell your fear.”

I’m afraid it’s too late for that.

He knows that I’m afraid of him, I always have been.

I’m doing my best not to show him, but that isn’t always easy.

I slowly eat my food, and then we head back to our cells.

I’m not looking forward to the groundwork I am set to do in a few hours because that means I’m less protected. I keep Mama’s advice in my mind and try to prepare myself as best I can.

By the time we’re all gathered for our duties, my stomach is twisting with anxiety.

I’m situated with two other girls weeding the gardens, which, thankfully, doesn’t seem to be near the men. But I did see him, and for a split second our eyes met, and he grinned. A familiar grin, one I remember so well. It made me sick to my stomach.

Right now, though, he is over digging some big holes for them to plant trees, and, for now, the guards are focusing their attention over there, no doubt because they’re using shovels.

One good hit with a shovel and I’d be out.

“Don’t want to get your hands dirty, Princess?”

The girl next to me scowls as I hesitate, my eyes swinging back and forth toward Hound’s direction. I wasn’t even paying attention to the task at hand, and clearly, she took that as me trying to get out of it. I glare at her, and she holds my eyes for long moments, challenging me to say something.

“No,” I mutter, then start weeding, shoving my gloved hands into the dirt with no hesitation.

I fucking hate being called Princess.

I weed without any issues for about an hour before a fight breaks out. It starts near where a heap of men are picking up leaves and rubbish from the yard. Fists fly, and in seconds, all the guards are rushing toward them. I watch, like everyone else, not realizing that anything is wrong until I hear a voice behind me, and a cold chill runs down my spine.

Hound is behind me, and he’s still holding the shovel which he is pressing against my legs so I know it’s there.

“You didn’t think I wouldn’t find a way to get to you, did you?”

He set this up to distract the guards, of course he did.

My mind spins as I turn toward him, my fingers trembling, my palms sweating. I have seconds, if that, to make a choice that could possibly save my life.

Hound grins, slow and evil, and pulls a shiv made out of a toothbrush from his shirt. He thrusts it in my direction so quickly it takes me a moment to realize that it has torn through my skin. My mouth opens and a silent scream gets stuck in my throat as the slow, burning pain in my stomach lets me know that he has successfully stabbed me.

He's going to kill me.

He pulls the makeshift knife out, and goes to plunge it back in, and I know this is my only chance for escape.

I inhale, gasping in pain, and I scream.

I scream with everything I have inside, loud and piercing, so intense that the guards are quickly distracted from the fight and begin running toward me. I lash out, kicking Hound in the shins as hard as I can, to try and prevent him from stabbing me again. Blood is soaking my shirt, and the look in his eyes tells me he’s not happy with what I’ve just done.

“Stupid girl,” he barks. “I’ll kill you.”

Xander is the guard to reach me first, and he pulls me back as another guard takes Hound and jerks him away, barking something in his ear that has him smiling in my direction. He’s not scared, why would he be? He knows he rules this place. Xander turns me toward the exits and begins ushering me to walk, heading toward the medical center.

My mind is spinning with every step I take, and I can’t think.

“He set that up,” I whisper to Xander. “He’s going to kill me.”

I don’t even realize I’m pressing a hand to my stomach.

“I won’t let him kill you.”

But really ... is there anything he can do to stop him?

Hound is determined, and smarter than I first thought.

He’s going to find a way to get to me.

I need to get out of here.

Now.