Jump Start

31. Thirty-one

Thirty-one

Harper

W atching Thomas’s car careen off the track into a wall was one of the most terrifying moments of my life. My heart stopped. I was glued to the screen in front of me, unable to speak until I saw him jump out of the car.

I knew the cars were designed to withstand a lot, and they were incredibly safe, but seeing the man I was in love with fly off the road into a solid concrete wall was bound to send me into some sort of shock.

“Thomas? Jacko?” Chris was asking through the headset.

“Thomas, are you okay, mate?” he repeated. I pushed the headset further onto my ears, in case I missed his reply. My eyes darted back and forth from the television broadcast to see what was happening.

A few minutes went by, but they felt like an eternity.

Suddenly, everyone in the garage jolted their heads up to the front, where Thomas appeared out of nowhere. Everyone raced towards him and hugged him, shook his hand, and yelled at him over the sound of the pouring rain.

I couldn’t move. I wasn’t sure he was actually there as I didn’t see him get out of his smashed-up car, let alone the medical car.

As he slid his helmet off, he looked through the garage, presumably looking for me. In a few strides, he was in front of me, his own eyes mirroring mine. Relief.

He pulled me flush against his body and threw his helmet on the ground to wrap both arms around me tightly, almost too tight, but I didn’t care.

He planted his lips firmly against the top of my head, rocking us back and forth.

He briefly separated us and dragged me out of the garage to a secluded area, with the rain pouring down on both of us.

“Harper,” he said breathlessly before crashing his lips to mine, fiercely.

His hands wrapped around my waist, and I struggled to get closer to him, my only option was to mould into him.

I pulled away from him, searching his face through the rain. His brow furrowed in question.

“I love you, Thomas,” I yelled through the sound of rain. He loosened his brow and smiled, moving his hands from my waist to my shoulder and spun me around.

“Let’s get out of this!” I could barely hear his words but followed him anyway.

We reached the medical truck and barged through the door, soaking wet.

The paramedics jumped up immediately and retrieved some towels for us both. We went to sit down, and seconds later, the door opened again, and Chris walked through, followed by Landon.

I stayed wrapped in the towel as Thomas was taken for his concussion and general check-up tests.

A DNF was the last way Echidna wanted to finish the year, but at least Thomas would still be second in the championship. However, the margin was now a lot smaller with his closest competitor, Andrew Eagan, of the Bradley Racing Team.

Due to the sheer volume of rain and unsafe conditions, the race was cancelled after Thomas’s crash, resulting in a red flag. This raised some questions among the teams regarding the work of the officials—did they take too big a risk in allowing the race to continue before eventually stopping? Chris had raised his concerns many times to them about the weather forecast, but they insisted the amount of rain was not detrimental to safety. Most of the teams in the garage would have gladly postponed rather than send their drivers out and waste resources. It was moments like this where I did not envy the team principal’s job—having to deal with the officials, regulations, lawyers, media, and not to mention all the people within the team.

Chris always handled the job with such grace, never raising his voice, always caring for the team and always trying to do what was best.

As my hair began to slowly dry, I shivered. I would need to head back to the room, turn on the heater, and freshen up. I stood up to leave when Thomas walked out, his race suit folded down halfway, showing his fireproof shirt, usually white, now grey with rain half-drying in several places.

“I’m alright, but we need to do a race debrief. I’ll walk you back to the room, so you can get changed and come back, okay?” he asked me casually. I nodded and grabbed his hand as we walked out of the medical truck.

“You doing okay?” I asked, breaking the silence. The passion from earlier had dissolved, maybe the adrenaline of the crash had worn off for him.

“I’m alright. I’ve crashed before. It’s no big deal. I just knew you would have been freaking out,” he said as he crossed in front of me to hold my other hand.

“I know you’ve crashed before, doesn’t make it any easier to see on the screen in front of me,” I said, my voice a little irritated. I was tired and a little drained after the last couple of hours.

Thomas stopped in front of me, and I ran into him.

“Shit!” He steadied me.

“Harps, this is all part of it. You will have to get used to it,” he retorted. His defiant attitude was starting to piss me off. I don’t know if he was trying to be nonchalant so I wouldn’t freak out more, or maybe he was trying to placate his own feelings.

“I get it, Thomas. I’m still in a bit of shock. Why are you being so calm? Your car crashed into a fucking wall at 230 kilometres an hour?” I raised my voice as we reached our hotel room.

He didn’t respond, just opened the door and silently walked through, with me trailing behind him.

The air-conditioning of the room gave me chills, but I ignored the feeling as I sat on the bed and waited. When he said nothing, I knew I had to be the first to speak.

“I don’t understand why you are being so calm,” I murmured, looking up at him as he stood over me, slowly taking off his race suit.

“Because this is part of the package. Granted, no one wants to crash, but that weather today had everyone struggling no matter what their package was. It was fucked.”

“You can say that again.”

He sat down next to me, fully naked, but it didn’t feel like the right moment to notice that in any sort of detail.

“I know you will worry, and I don’t blame you. But I am okay, see?” he said, pointing up and down his body. “Not a scratch.”

He placed his hand on my back. I found it difficult to move as I was exhausted. The sound of his phone ringing snapped me out of my thoughtless haze.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just need to get changed and I’ll be right back,” he replied into the phone. Standing up, he grabbed the closest pair of tracksuit pants and put them on without underwear, and a hoodie without a shirt.

“You’re not going to put anything on underneath?” I asked quizzically as I watched him slip a pair of slides over some socks.

“Nah, it’s just a drivers debrief with Landon in Chris’s room. Please go have a shower and get comfy. I won’t be too long, okay?” His brown eyes begged, even though his tone was neutral.

I offered the best fake smile I could muster and stood up to head towards the bathroom. He stopped me halfway.

“Thank you for worrying. I’m fine. I love you and I’ll be back soon.” He placed a quick peck on my lips, then patted me on the butt before he grabbed his phone and walked out the door.

I turned the shower on and closed my eyes. The sound of the water running made me feel calm, mixed with the light rain outside.

I knew there would be moments like this. I would see a crash and I knew I would have to learn how to deal with it better, to not let the worry consume me.

Could you ever be prepared for this feeling, though? I guess it was a good thing that Thomas was so calm about the whole incident, as it would eventually serve us much better. No point in us both panicking.

As I washed my hair, I realised how heavy my limbs felt, tired from a long day of sitting in uncomfortable chairs and standing on hard concrete floors, mixed with emotion, adrenaline, and pure shock. I would be passing out the moment my head hit the pillow.

And I did.

***

Thomas

Walking away from Harper felt wrong, unnatural, and my feet felt like they were getting dragged into quicksand. The further I was from our room, the worse I felt. I wanted to go back and make her come with me. I wanted her with me, everywhere I went, but I knew she was exhausted, and she needed to sleep. Me on the other hand, I was wired, electrified even. I didn’t feel shocked, I felt more alive than I ever had.

I wasn’t sure if it was because I had been in an accident or if it suddenly woke me up, like a reality check. I drove fast and sometimes, in dangerous weather, there could be consequences.

The debrief with Chris and Landon was intricate, and long, and by the end of it, I had finally hit a wall. No pun intended.

“Righto, mate, long as you’re okay, head back and take tomorrow off. The season is over now. We’ve got the end-of-year celebrations tomorrow night, but it’s up to you if you both want to join.” I knew Harper would want to. She had a dress picked out and had been looking forward to it for months, since before accepting her role at Echidna.

** *

The sound of the hotel room door opening felt like it was amplified as I walked into the dark, cool space to the sound of Harper lightly snoring. She didn’t always snore, mostly when she was exhausted, which I knew she would be after today.

After a very quick shower, I hopped into bed, trying not to wake her. She stirred and rolled over, putting a leg over both of mine and nuzzling onto my chest.

“You’re home late.” Her voice cracked with sleep.

“I tried not to wake you. Sorry.” She didn’t seem to mind.

“Please, love me,” she managed to get out as I moved behind her, wrapping my arms around her shoulders and pulling her close, her ass settling against my hips.

I took a deep breath in, the smell of her strawberry shampoo overtaking my senses. This is what I needed to be safe for, to come back to this.

***

In the light of a new day, everything felt calmer. Harper had woken me up in the middle of the night for sex. The need to be as close as possible was overwhelming, so we got lost in each other, the intimacy taking on a desperate edge. There were worse ways to be woken up. I could have stayed with her in that hotel room forever.

We joined the breakfast festivities with the rest of the team but decided we wanted to go home early and skip the dinner and drinks. We were exhausted. There would be a Christmas party back home, so we would have another chance to celebrate with everyone.

We did a once-over of the hotel room, and then I grabbed Harper’s hand, leading her out of the room, our minimal luggage in tow.

Walking down the hotel hallway in silence, I adjusted my grip on her hand, tightening my fingers around hers to reassure her. I wasn’t going anywhere.

“Okay, I’ll do it,” Harper said out of the blue as we started to drive away from the racing precinct.

I raised my eyebrows. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, so I asked with caution.

“What’s that?” I replied, trying to feign ignorance.

“I’ll move in with you, dummy!” she replied, a sparkling smile on her face and her hand touching my arm.

I smiled, wishing there was somewhere I could pull over to kiss her properly, but we were on a busy highway.

“Hell of a time to tell me, Harps! Fuck me, that makes me so happy,” I crowed, unable to control my excitement or enthusiasm.

“I love you so much. I don’t know why it took me so long to get here,” she choked out.

I knew why she took so long; she needed time to be sure about me, to make sure I could offer her what she needed. But I was glad she came to this decision.

“I’m glad you took your time, honey, I love you too. We’ll start moving your stuff once we’re back home, yeah?” I asked, wishing I could just drive straight to her apartment now and move her out immediately.

We agreed that over the first few days of the off-season, we would stay at her place and pack up, then move to mine. She didn’t have a huge amount of stuff. It would all fit in my house no problem. Our house.

The drive home felt so easy; the loud music, the non-stop banter and laughter, stopping for coffee along the way, holding her every chance I got.

This was it for me.