Kit (A Little Christmas Season Three)

Chapter 2

2

Parker

“ I never thought you’d find the perfect outfit for getting laid that I’ve ever seen, but you have managed it.” Nelson, my little brother by one year, kicked up his feet on my white couch—with his shoes still on.

I put it out of my mind and turned around, arms out, in my new suit.

“You think so?”

“I know so. Wow. What made you decide to wear that to the club?”

“I auditioned.”

“What?”

“They were having auditions for someone to play Santa at all their Christmas parties. Three of them. I got hired.”

Nelson frowned. “People who play Santa at Christmas as an extra job are usually down on their luck.” He glanced around my clean and rather large living room and said, “You don’t need the money.”

“It wasn’t about that.”

I turned around in my new red suit again. It was perfect, complete with a black leather belt, gold buckle, and long red velvet jacket trimmed with white faux fur and gold brocade. The knee-high black leather boots felt good on my calves. All that was missing was the hat with its built-in wig, and the beard. And the round belly. I had the hat and beard in my pocket. The round belly was in my Santa pack. But the beard was a problem. It itched and I worried I was allergic to the elastic that went behind my ears to hold it in place.

“Is this about getting laid?” Nelson asked.

“No. I’ve decided to go back to pursuing acting like I did in my early twenties. As a hobby.”

Nelson jumped up and punched me in the shoulder. “I’m so happy for you. You were really good. I was mad you gave it up for such a boring career.”

“I like finance. I was always good at math. But the acting bug never quite left my blood.”

“Well hell. It’s a paid gig, right?”

I nodded.

“We should celebrate.”

“Later. I have to be there by nine.”

“You’re getting paid and you’ll have a lineup of littles waiting to sit on your lap. You love littles. You have all the luck.”

“It should be fun. Wanna come along?”

Nelson was a kinky guy like me. But he was taking a break right now for good reason.

“Nope. I’m still moping about Chad cheating on me. I thought I’d hang out here, watch movies and eat junk food.”

“Lock up when you leave,” I said.

Nelson was always welcome at my place, plus he was going through a hard time. I could never say no to him.

“Just try not to get greasy pizza all over my couch and rug this time.”

“I’ll be tidy.”

“Famous last words.” I grabbed my keys and wallet.

Nelson settled in with the remote, calling after me. “Ho ho ho. Have a great time and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

Seeing as how we had similar tastes, that left me pretty wide open to do as I pleased.

I was technically a Club 99 employee now, even if only a part-time temp, which meant when I got to the club I had the privilege of using the employee parking lot and entrance. Security let me through, no problem, despite snickering at my awesome Santa suit.

I had my own locker where I stashed my personal items, and was allowed to use the breakroom, which was a rather elaborate area with plush couches and a fridge stocked with snacks and drinks.

Mr. Winterbourne treated his employees well. Not that he couldn’t afford it. He was madly wealthy and owned Club 99 for his own pleasure. Plus, a nice tax write-off. I’d heard through the grapevine it made very little profit and he threw everything back into it, which included paying employees well and keeping the membership fees affordable. It was the bar that made the money to keep everything going.

It was time to get going. My appearance was set up on the live music stage. I even had a throne with red velvet pillows.

In the locker room, I pulled down my pants and fastened the false round stomach around my waist. It sagged but when I buckled the pants into place, it looked great. Soft and comfy.

I put on the itchy beard at the last minute. It tugged at my ears. The cherry on top was the hat with white curls of hair hanging from it. It had special trim with little bells sewn into it and a long stocking that ended with a furry white puff ball at the tip that sat perfectly over my left shoulder.

When I looked in the locker room mirror, I didn’t recognize myself. That meant I’d done my job disappearing into my role.

I cleared my throat and tested my Santa voice, low and firm, but lighthearted, too. This was a fun night.

I grabbed my red bag filled with candy canes and little stuffed animals. The locker room led out to the foyer where Colin, the bouncer, was manning the front entrance.

Big, burly Colin did a double-take. “Wow. You look great, Parker.”

“You can tell it’s me?”

“Nope. I saw the employee sheet.”

“Oh, good. I was worried for a second there.”

“It’s fantastic. Did you have that getup made special?”

“Yep.”

Colin grinned. “You’re going to kill it.”

“Are they ready for me?”

Colin went ahead of me, peering around the corner at the bar and dance floor. “Mr. Winterbourne himself is going to announce your entrance.”

“Really? I didn’t realize.”

Colin made a hand motion to someone out in the bar. The industrial carols didn’t stop playing but the sound lowered to a whisper.

“Sorry to interrupt all your fun out there.” It was Mr. Winterbourne’s voice over the club sound system. “But this is a Christmas party, and it wouldn’t be complete without a visit from Santa.”

Cheering followed.

“I’m sure you all will give him a big welcome after such a long sleigh flight straight from the North Pole. He’s here to spread the cheer and listen to your Christmas wishes. Won’t you give a big welcome to Santa Claus!”

A roar of applause nearly shook the rafters. Colin beckoned to me.

When I came around the corner, I saw a pathway laid out for me through the crowd all the way to the stage.

I hadn’t seen all the decorations beforehand. The club had gone all out. A huge glittering tree towered to one side, all lit up with sparkling lights. Light strings ran along the bar. And before me was a glimmering path created by temporary partitions with velvet ropes.

I let out a hearty “Ho ho ho” and slung my red sack over my shoulder, walking down the path toward the stage.

“Merry Christmas!” I yelled over and over, making sure to face both sides of the path and let the audience know I saw them.

I reached into my pocket with my free hand and grabbed fistfuls of glitter which I threw into the air.

They welcomed me with an outpouring of excitement, applauding with celebratory yells. No one stopped being a kid at Christmas. I saw all shapes and sizes out there, all modes of dress. Littles and boys jumped up and down shouting, “Santa! Santa!”

I stepped up onto the stage where Mr. Winterbourne, in his flashy designer suit and looking perfect as ever, waved me over.

“It is my pleasure to introduce Santa Claus. Welcome, Santa, to Club 99’s seventh annual Christmas party,” he said. Then stepped back beside the fancy throne where I was to sit for the next two hours and let me have the mike.

I had my short speech prepared. I’d written it myself and it was approved by Mr. Winterbourne.

“Ho ho ho, everyone, and Merry Christmas! I just flew in from the North Pole where the weather is cold, but the elves are hot and naughty. Daily spankings help keep them in order.” I waved my hand through the air in a spanking motion which got me the laughs I desired.

My writing might not be the best, but I knew how to deliver. The audience immediately got into it, hooting and hollering to spur me on.

“Did you bring any of those hot elves with you?” someone shouted.

I shook my head. “They are too busy making toys for play right now. Only three more weeks until Christmas.”

“Boooo.”

Tough crowd.

“Looks like a hot crowd tonight,” I added. “I can tell Santa’s naughty list will expand after tonight.”

Laughter.

“Have you all been good? Are your letters to Santa in the mail? No matter what, Santa knows. He knows everything and has come to wish you all the best holiday season ever. I’ll be taking requests up here if you’d like to tell me your wishes face to face. I’ve got gifts in my bag and time to see you all. There’s a photographer here if you want a photo.”

More applause.

I turned to see Mr. Winterbourne nodding, happy with my performance.

“Your throne, sir,” he said.

I set my pack on the floor beside the elaborate chair and sat. The velvet cushion was soft as a cloud. The chair back rose two feet above my head. My fake Santa tummy bump sat properly against my upper thighs. For tonight, I was the king.

People immediately came down the path and started to line up to sit in my lap. I thought the lineup would consist of littles and boys, but every type of guy stood before me in all manners of costume. Old and young. Big and little. Leather or lace, they all loved Santa and wanted their pictures taken.

The dance music returned. The dance floor became crowded again, the air heating up.

One by one, the guys came up. Some straddled my lap and faced me, others sat to the side. Some were lewd, others shyer. Many asked for a date.

“I’ve always wanted to fuck Santa.” That was a phrase I heard over and over, which shouldn’t have surprised me.

The littles were the most fun and being a daddy it was easy for me to talk to them because I knew what they wanted. To be coddled and nurtured. To be told they were good boys. To be assured Santa was real and would take care of them without any worries.

For each person who sat in my lap, they received a toy and a candy cane. Some declined, but most took the animal stuffies. They were cute and small, and as I Iooked out over the dance floor, people were throwing them into the air or playing catch with them.

I didn’t expect to run out of toys before the line ended. More and more guys kept coming.

I gave away the last stuffed doggy just before a little showed up next in line. He held a toy fire truck and teddy bear under one arm. Besides that, I knew he was a little by the way he held himself. And the sweet, wide-eyed look he sent me.

A tingle went done my spine. This boy was different. Cute, yes, but something else caught my eye. He stood out to me because he wasn’t being a cutie pie. Not that I had anything against those sparkly boys in makeup and littles in diapers with rainbow t-shirts, but this one caught my eye. All boy. A little but not a baby. He wore torn jeans and a plain red shirt. His hair was in his eyes. And he looked ready to climb his first tree and fall in the mud.

Suddenly, I wanted to be the one to catch him.

I lifted my forefinger to motion him forward. “Hello, little boy. Merry Christmas.”

He took a long step forward, then stopped.

“Don’t be afraid. I’m Santa Claus. From the North Pole.”

“Are you really Santa?” he asked. He had yet to step on the stage.

“I sure am. My reindeer are staying at the zoo right now being well taken care of while I visit.”

He took another step forward, and up. Now he stood before me.

“But who are you really?” he asked.

I spread my white-gloved hands. “The real deal.”

He looked down at my bag. “Do you really have a present in there for me?”

A pang hit my stomach. I’d just given away the last toy.