Knot Broken (Hiddenverse)

16. Lilah

CHAPTER 16

Lilah

It’s stupid, I know it is, but I can’t help waiting up for the group date to return. I’m sitting in the living room with the first group, a ball of nervous energy.

I’ve been in a state of this strange mix of excitement and fear since this morning with Rafe in the kitchen. Something shifted. At least it felt like it did. And I couldn’t control my perfuming when he invaded my space. I’m sure the chlorine from the hot tub blocked it out. If he did scent me, he didn’t give any kind of indication.

I guess skipping the blocking pill on accident and only using lotion, mixing it with going in the water was a bad combination. One I won’t repeat. I need to get my hormones under control.

“They’re back!” Abby says excitedly as she peers out the window.

Headlights make a path down the long drive, and I’m pretty sure my body is vibrating with nerves now. Will they come in? Will Rafe talk to me?

Shit. What am I? Some newly-presented omega? Get it under control, Lilah .

Popping to my feet, I head into the kitchen and pour a glass of wine. Then I go the opposite direction and out onto the back patio. I’m running. Goosebumps explode over my skin in the cold night air. But I keep myself planted out here.

Butterflies explode in my stomach, and I wrap my arms around my middle, attempting to soothe the feeling. Their rich voices flow through the cracked door, and I want to seek them out. I want to be just like all the other omegas.

Chiding myself for being silly, I force my legs to carry me back inside. It’s just the idea of going on a date tomorrow and being sent home making me feel this way. That is all.

Stepping back into the living room, I take a sip of my wine, crossing my arms loosely as I watch them. Voices rise up as each omega attempts to garner the attention of one of the alphas.

Earlier, Tyler came back with the trinket, and honestly I can’t remember any of them seeming to have a connection with him. A sort of jealousy swirls in my stomach as I look for the charm they gave Tyler on Hailey’s bracelet. It isn’t as if production would let them give it to any of the other omegas, so it has to be on her wrist.

“You’re looking a little sulky over here,” Chad says as he approaches, his voice light and teasing.

I take a sip of my wine, trying to mask the sudden tightness in my chest. “Sulky?”

“Yes. Like a child who didn’t get their candy. Don’t you want to hear about the ghost tour?”

“I’m in the room, aren’t I?” I nod toward the group, their laughter and excitement filling the space.

“They don’t know the half of it,” Chad whispers, his tone conspiratorial as he lifts his wrist. The silver rose charm on his bracelet gleams under the light.

“Wait, they gave it to you?” My hand reaches out instinctively, capturing his wrist to bring the charm closer. The sight of it makes my heart stutter.

His smile widens, and he wiggles his eyebrows as if he’s sharing a secret. “Rafe did.”

My heart falters, a sudden ache spreading through my chest. The smile I’ve been holding onto wavers, but I force it to stay in place. “How did that happen?”

“We have a connection now. The same sort you have with him.” His grin is smug, full of satisfaction, and it feels like a punch to the gut. I wasn’t prepared for this. I wasn’t ready to realize just how much I’ve started to care—how much I’ve started to fall for Rafe.

He watches me, waiting for a reaction, and I struggle to keep my voice steady. “That makes sense. I can’t be everywhere at once. But… how does that help you?”

“Well, you don’t want to be picked in the end. I do. So—” he trails off, but the implication is clear. Chad offered himself up as the one they’ll choose, the one who’ll go home with them. And Rafe… Rafe made a deal with him, just like that.

The sting of betrayal is sharp, cutting deeper than I expected. I blink rapidly, turning my gaze toward the group, trying to compose myself. When I finally look back at Chad, I force a smile that feels more like a mask. “Wow, this date really paid off for you.”

But even as I speak, my eyes dart toward Rafe, who is leaning in close to Willow, whispering something that makes her laugh. The sight sends a twist of jealousy and pain through me, the kind I can’t ignore. Is he making a deal with her too? My thoughts race, and the realization hits me harder than I want to admit: I’m falling for him, and now, it feels like I’m losing him before I ever really had a chance.

“It sure did,” Chad says, his voice full of smug triumph. “Now, I just have to make sure the other two want to keep me at the end. ”

His words cut through me, a brutal reminder that this isn’t just a game—it’s my heart on the line. I thought I could handle it, thought I could keep my feelings in check, but now… now it feels like everything is unraveling, and I’m powerless to stop it.

After a night of tossing and turning, I’m up with the birds at the crack of dawn. I can’t sleep another second even if I tried. Tamika and Tyler are both asleep as I slip into the bathroom. Willow offered to help with my hair, but I didn’t have the heart to wake her this early.

For some reason, I want to be perfect for this date. With Rafe having a deal with Chad now, he has no need for me. Not really. Especially since we are getting down in numbers.

Once my makeup can’t get any better and my hair is dried and styled to perfection, I pick up the pill bottle for the descenter, ready to twist the lid off and take one. Pressing my lips together, I meet my light blue eyes in the mirror. It’s a one-on-one date. Would it hurt to not take the pill? Let them scent me? My heart beats rapidly as I study the label. Shit. I’m really thinking of doing it.

It’s wrong.

I swallow. But the idea of them being able to smell me has my stomach bottoming out. My palms go clammy as I make up my mind.

The sound of the pill bottle touching the counter sounds like a shotgun to my ears, and I glance at the shut bathroom door as if my roommates will storm in and demand to know why I’m breaking the rules.

Before I can second guess my decision, I pull open the door. Tamika and Tyler are both still asleep, and I breathe a sigh of relief before slipping from the room .

The whole house seems to still be asleep, which makes sense; they stayed up late. While I retreated to my room to get my emotions under control, the whole house seemed to have a party. Now, I’m thankful for that as I wait for eight a.m. to arrive.

The half hour passes slowly, and at about ten minutes till eight, the rumble of a large engine pulls my attention to the long driveway. A SUV makes its way down the narrow path, and as it comes to a stop near the front steps, I notice the cameramen already here filming.

Miles climbs out from the driver's seat looking like he just stepped off of a GQ magazine in his light blue t-shirt and athletic pants. That color blue will make his eyes pop. Elliott hits the same vibe on its head as he climbs out of the back seat. Only he wears a deep green shirt that makes his light hair look even lighter. Rafe is the last one from the car, as if they had to choreograph the order they get out of the SUV for filming purposes. His T-shirt is a soft heather gray, with matching pants that should be illegal.

Finally releasing the breath that had lodged in my throat the second I saw them, I inhaled a greedy lungful of fresh air. Deciding not to wait for them to come inside, I rush to the door and fling it open. Sure, I might look eager, but that’s what the show wants anyway, right?

Miles’ face lights up the second he sees me, and Elliott follows his line of sight, his gaze softening with happiness the moment our eyes meet. I smooth my hands over my leggings before tugging my soft oversized sweater down over my fingers. The chill in the morning air had me dressing for warmth. I still have on a T-shirt under my sweater, just in case.

“Hey,” I say after I realize I’m just staring at them like some lovesick omega.

Miles bounds up the stone steps and pulls me in for a hug. Completely wrapping me in his arms. The second he touches me, I know going without the pills is a grave mistake because I cannot control the slight sweet scent of baking cookies and cream wafting from me. His arms tighten, and he buries his head into my neck, inhaling deeply.

“Is that—?” he asks, a slight possessive growl rumbling in his throat.

I pull back from him, my eyes on the ground. I didn’t expect to perfume the second they arrived. But here we are, and it’s awkward as fuck. My face heats, and I’m unable to lift my gaze from the planter at the bottom of the steps.

“I, uh, I need to go take my pill. I was rushing to get ready, and I must have forgotten.” I gesture behind me, my stomach in knots at my lie. Without waiting for a response, I turn away from him, only to be stopped as he wraps his fingers around my wrist and pulls me back.

“Don’t.” He clears his throat, and I force my eyes up to his. “Don’t take it.”

I wet my lips and swallow as I try to find my words. Tingles run over my body all the way down to my toes. “It’s against the rules,” I say. I knew that. Yet, it didn’t stop me.

“I won’t tell…if you don’t,” he says.

He runs a finger along my jaw, his thumb brushing over my lips like he wants to kiss me. My stomach twists with the sensation, and I sway into him.

It’s wrong, I know it is, but I nod and let him lead me from the steps. I may have just jumped into the deep end, and I’m not sure I can swim.