Knot Broken (Hiddenverse)

19. Rafe

CHAPTER 19

Rafe

I hate myself for my selfish words. But I hate myself even more as my lips crash down on hers. Devouring every bit of her I can.

Not for the cameras. Or some sort of lie. Pure need cascades inside of me. I could live on her perfume. And if matches were more than a fairytale told to young alphas and omegas, she would be mine.

I don’t need an omega. Hell, I don’t even want one. But I am quickly becoming addicted to this one. And I will use whatever I need to use to keep her here. Pretty words don’t work. I’m sure the alpha who hurt her used pretty words. Maybe kisses will.

She kisses me back, as if she’s starved for physical touch. Her fingers prove it as they flatten against my chest, not pushing me away, just touching me. Goosebumps erupt and travel down my spine as her hands curl around my biceps, finding skin. The contact makes me lightheaded, and when her nails dig into my muscles, it takes a minute to register that she’s gently resisting—not enough for the cameras to notice, but enough to break through the haze clouding my thoughts.

Pulling back, I stare down at her slightly swollen lips before bringing my gaze to hers. Pure need shines in the depths of her light blue eyes. And it takes everything in me to ignore it. To hold myself back from propping her up on the railing and doing away with her leggings. Claiming her out here with the raging river as the backdrop.

“Take this as a warning, little omega, come to me without your lotion or your pills and this will happen again. Only next time, I won’t stop,” I promise as I step back, giving her the space she needs to slip past me. She presses her lips together, but doesn’t say a word as she moves around me.

Controlling my breathing, I stare out over the rushing river beyond the railing. I wrap my fingers around the wood and tuck my head into my chest. This isn’t part of the plan. I will never give another omega the power to hurt me again. Including one as tempting as Lilah. I lost myself for a second in her arms, allowing thoughts that don’t belong to slip through. Securing the wall I’ve built around my heart, I push away from the view and turn back to the film crew with a smile on my face.

Lilah flirts with Elliott, her demeanor carefree and playful, and he laps it up with a grin. But as her perfume envelops the space between them, it hits Elliott like a ton of bricks. It’s unmistakable now—definitely not the scent of freshly baked cookies he thought he’d detected in the SUV. The air is thick with her fragrance, and I can’t help but think that even the alphas on the film crew must be able to smell it.

Just the thought of someone noticing, of one slip-up leading to Lilah being caught and sent home, sends a growl rumbling in my chest. I close the space between us, feeling the weight of the potential disaster. If just one person says a word, if the wrong scent is detected or the wrong comment is made, it’s all over. Lilah could be lost to the show, her presence and our chance at something real wiped away in an instant.

“Ready?” I ask, as if they weren’t waiting for me to compose myself.

Lilah glances up at me, a playful expression on her face. “We were going to leave you behind.”

“Too bad I could just follow. I know where you’re going,” I remind her.

She pushes back and stands up, appearing unfazed by our kiss a few minutes ago, and it grates on my nerves. She should be as shaken as I am, as if the ground has moved beneath her feet and she can’t find her footing. Or a tornado has driven through her world, tearing it to shreds, and destroying everything she built. But she isn’t here for love.

“We both know you would rather be anywhere but on this date,” she says. When she pats my chest as if she’s placating me, my fingers automatically wrap around her wrist, holding her touch just above my heart.

“Do we?” I whisper, ducking my head to breathe a fresh hit of her cookies and cream scent. It’s intoxicating.

She sucks in a breath, freezing as my nose grazes her jawline, the tension between us palpable.

Fuck . What’s wrong with me?

It’s like the second I’m in her orbit, the walls around my heart crumble. I find myself yearning for this woman in a way that scares the hell out of me. Fighting the urge to pull her closer, I step back, letting Miles slip between us with a casual but knowing look. He guides her through the restaurant and out to the SUV, his hand resting lightly on her back.

Elliott pauses next to me as Miles opens the car door for Lilah. “It’s okay to fall for her. Miles and I both want her, too.” I narrow my eyes on him, and he shrugs. “Not everyone is like Hailey. ”

Scoffing, I look away. “I don’t compare everyone to her.”

“No, but you hold everyone at arm's length because of her,” he says. “You promised you would give this a shot. Kissing Lilah like your life depends on it and then pushing her away, isn’t it. She’s been hurt before, you heard her…”

“She isn’t here for love, Elliott. Don’t let yourself fall for an omega who doesn’t plan to stay.” I squeeze his shoulder, my words as much for me as they are for him, before heading around to the other side of the vehicle. Maybe some space is what I need because those words hit too close to home.

After an uneventful ride to the go-kart park, we are greeted with even more cameras when we arrive.

As we step onto the go-kart track, I force myself to take a breath and try to loosen the tension that’s been coiled in my chest since the restaurant. It’s not easy, but I know I have to let it go. The rules have been broken, the line has been crossed, and there’s nothing any of us can do about it now. The chips will fall where they may.

The crew’s everywhere, cameras in every direction, capturing every angle, but I try to ignore them. Hope that none of them catch her perfume in the open air. Lilah’s ahead, her laughter floating back to us as she practically skips toward the go-karts, light and carefree. It’s like she doesn’t have a worry in the world, while I’m wound so tight I could snap.

I glance over at Elliott, who’s grinning like an idiot, clearly enjoying this more than he should. Miles is next to him, his competitive spirit radiating off him as he eyes the track like he’s already planning his victory.

But for me? I’m fighting a losing battle to keep my mind off Lilah. Every time I see her, smell her, touch her, it’s like a punch to the gut, a reminder that I'm deeper than I ever planned to be. She was supposed to be a shield, a way to make it to the end of this show without getting feelings involved.

Right. Lie to yourself some more.

Miles rubs his hands together excitedly. “I am taking you all down,” he jokes. If he’s anything, he is competitive.

Lilah laughs, the sound light and carefree. “If you can catch me,” she teases with a wink that sends a jolt of electricity through the air.

Miles wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. “What do I get if I do?”

She laughs again, a melodic sound that seems to cut through the tension, but she doesn’t reply as she heads toward the go-karts.

“We should make a bet,” I say, my voice steady despite the swirl of emotions inside me. She spins on her heels, curiosity sparking in her eyes. My heart pounds, but the next words fall from my lips with surprising ease. “If one of us wins, we get seven minutes alone with you. Away from the cameras.” Because even though I shouldn’t want that, I do. So bad.

Seven minutes in heaven. That’s what it would be.

“And what do I get when I win?”

“What do you want?” I ask, my throat dry as I anticipate her answer.

She rolls her lips together, sinking her teeth into her lower one before slowly releasing it. “A kiss. From each of you.”

Not what I expected. My gaze drops to her lips, the feel of them still on mine like a phantom. Yanking my eyes away, I share a look with Elliott and Miles and then nod. “Okay.” Sounds like we’re winning either way.

“No cheating, boys,” she sing-songs as she turns back around, continuing her path to the go-kart track, leaving us to watch her go.