Knot Broken (Hiddenverse)

23. Lilah

CHAPTER 23

Lilah

It feels like a different world when I step back into the mansion with the other omegas. Chad descends on me the second I’m through the door. Willow’s not too far behind.

“Bitch, I knew you’d make it,” he says with a wide grin. “Tell me every detail.”

The other omegas trail into the living room, all of them looking for a story time, I’m sure. Seeing no way to avoid it, I perch on the edge of a chair and give the barest of details. Breakfast, go-kart, mini-golf, and a small picnic lunch that was awkward as hell after Miles returned from his run.

Not that I mention that detail. I didn't mention the run. Or the kisses. Or my lack of blockers.

They all act like they are excited that I'm back, but I see the calculation in Hailey’s eyes and the way Blair leans toward her and whispers something. They look like mean girls. And it makes my stomach drop.

Soon the omegas disburse, with the exception of Chad. He sinks into the couch on my right and eyes me. “Tell me the real story. ”

A blush rises to my cheeks, and I shake my head denying his words. “I did.”

He purses his lips into his pouty smile and says, “We both know you didn’t. I saw production go into your room and grab some of your things. Spill.”

I swallow and glance at both of the entrances into the large room. “Not here,” I say.

He grins and stands up, offering me his hand. I take it and we head out to the patio. The other omegas are all busy getting ready for the ceremony tonight, so we should have some privacy. And if I’m going to admit this to him, I have to do it without the chance of them hearing.

He tugs me down to the cushions of an outdoor couch that faces the back of the mansion. Rolling my lips between my teeth, I think of how to start and what to say. As I pull my leg up and face him, he watches me with an expectant look as nerves run through me. Then I do the one thing I said I never would again; I trust an omega that isn’t my sister with my secrets.

As I finish the full story, leaving nothing out, he inhales. “Damn girl. I didn’t think you had it in you. I love it.”

“I surprised myself.”

He chuckles. “What do you think Rafe meant, you are off limits? It has to be something big since I’m pretty sure that man was half in love with you before your little adventure today.”

“You don’t believe in love, Chad.” I roll my eyes and look back toward the house. The idea of Rafe being in love with me encourages the butterflies to explode in my stomach, even though I know it isn’t true.

He shakes his head. “I actually do. For other people, maybe. At least I think I’ve seen people in love, and I'm pretty sure Rafe has all the signs.”

Dropping my leg back to the patio, I lean back into the cushions. “It’s all fake, remember?” I say dryly, looking up at the changing colors of the sky from the setting sun. I need to remember that. “A production put on for views.”

He huffs out a sarcastic laugh. “Yeah, is that why you forgot your scent blockers?”

“I’m going to plead the fifth.”

“I don’t think you can, not now that you’ve told me how far you’ll go to stay.”

Bumping my shoulder with his, I say, “You’ll still be the first choice.”

He bumps me back and hums out a non-response. “We’ll see.”

The mansion seems bigger after the elimination. The next morning when Turner Clark shows up and announces two group dates. Five and Five, with one omega left out completely, I didn’t expect to feel the crushing disappointment when my name wasn't announced. No one-on-one date this time around. A change from the normal show, and I’m sure added in to create more drama.

It’s a sort of punishment as the other ten omegas get ready to go on their respective dates. The guys don’t come inside for either of them, and I’m too much of a chicken to go to the windows with the others. Instead, I slink upstairs to the library and watch from the shadows of those windows. Longing hits me hard each time they come to the house but don’t come in. By time the evening comes, I’m a ball of nerves waiting for Chad to return with details, while also attempting to dodge Hailey and Blair.

Shutting the refrigerator door, I turn away with my soda can in my grip. With a cut off squeal, I almost jump out of my skin when I find Miles standing behind me .

“Lilah,” he says, his brows shooting up into his hairline at my little scream of shock. “I didn’t mean to sneak up on you.”

“What are you doing here? You are supposed to be on a group date,” I say.

He ruffles his black, silky hair, looking slightly uncomfortable talking about his date, and focuses on the can of coke I’m still holding. “Yeah, we’re back. We just got back a few minutes ago.”

I nod. How did I miss them coming in? And why is this meeting so awkward? I don’t even know how to carry on a conversation with him. What’s wrong with me?

“Did you have fun?” I ask and hold back a cringe. I don’t want to know about his date any more than he wants to tell me.

He swallows, his jaw flexing, as he brings his crystal blue eye up to mine. “Lilah, I don’t want to talk about other omegas with you.”

The air in my lungs evaporates the longer our eyes stay locked on each other. It’s like a physical touch. I’m not sure what happened yesterday that had him disappearing while I was in the shower, but the same distance is between us today. And I miss his flirting and light personality.

“What do you want to talk about?” Why on earth is emotion gathering in my eyes and catching in my throat? Shit. Just how far have I let myself fall?

I set the can on the counter and put the kitchen island between us as I add some distance. “This situation’s messed up…” he starts, and his words have my pulse racing and thundering inside my ears. “I never imagined?—”

I hold my breath, waiting for him to finish. Hailey and Blair stride into the room as if they own it, taking all the air from my lungs as Miles straightens and taps the island before backing away .

“This isn’t the place for this conversation,” he says, glancing at the others.

Hailey huffs out a laugh. “Don’t stop on our account.”

Blair flips her long dark hair over her shoulder and drags her eyes down my body, taking in my casual sweats and T-shirt look, before dismissing me like gum on the bottom of her shoe. Her lip curls up, and she shifts her attention to Miles. “Hey, sexy.”

My stomach churns as she closes the distance and lays her hand on his bicep, as if it belongs there. I choke off the possessive growl that wants to flow out of me as my fingers curl in on themselves. My nails dig into my skin. He’s as still as a statue, his eyes on me. The longer she touches him, the stronger the urge to rip her away from him is.

Breathing through my nose, I part my lips on an exhale, controlling my urges. Before saying, “I should go.”

He doesn’t stop me as I pick up my can of soda and flee the room. And Blair and Hailey’s laughter follows me. Those two are two peas in a pod, neither one of them are here for the guys. Blair’s here to grow her social following, and Hailey’s here for publicity. At least most of the time I think that’s why Hailey is here. It’s crazy that either one of them has made it this far.

But then, as Chad loves to remind me, this show’s all fake. Which means, the feelings growing inside of me are out of place. None of them are mine. It’s all in my head—wishful thinking.

Retreating to the second floor where none of the alphas can go, I sink into a comfortable armchair in the small library. It’s close enough to the window to see out to the front drive without being visible to the people outside. It’s the same place I watch them leave on their dates. Stupidly analyzing their facial expressions and gestures to the other omegas.

Now, I watch as Rafe and Elliott chat with Chad. Rafe laughs at something he says, while Elliott shakes his head ruefully.

The falling sun casts them all in an amazing lighting. They look good together. If Chad were here for love and any of this was real, I could see them picking him at the end. And I would be happy for my new friend, if he was the one to make them happy. Not that it won’t break me in every way.

That’s the way it will be. I should get used to it. Second best for a second time.