Knot Over (Omega Den #3)

7. Kaylani

Chapter 7

Kaylani

A s I sit on the front porch of my childhood home the cool breeze rustles the leaves, a gentle reminder of simpler times. I used to spend hours here, in this very spot. Lost in books or buried in homework. But today, the serenity of the porch offers little relief from the turmoil within me. Nausea rolls through my stomach, a cold sweat breaking out on my brow. I should take another dose of Heat to keep my instincts in check. I'm not ready for my heat. Especially since I can feel that this one is going to be different.

I take a shaky sip of my coffee, letting the warmth settle in my belly. But even my favorite drink does little to ease the fire under my skin. It feels like ants crawling beneath my flesh, each movement a sharp reminder that my heat is coming, whether I want it to or not. Fear grips me, twisting my stomach into knots.

The temptation to take another dose of the stimulant is almost overwhelming. Just one more hit to keep the heat at bay, to avoid the agony of coming off it cold turkey. Because even though I'm just a few days late taking it, my body is on fire.

The bottle I stole is sitting in my purse. It would be so easy to take one. To stop my heat from coming. But that thought is like a knife to my chest, a painful reminder of my mother. She let her hormones dictate her life, drowning in the cycle of addiction until it consumed her. I swore I’d never be like her. I’d never let myself fall into that same trap.

But knowing the worst heat of my life is on the horizon, knowing I’m not ready to face it, makes it so damn hard. Especially with Adam’s bite still searing like a brand on my skin. My fingers trace the ridges on my shoulder, the mark he left there. The spot hums to life under my touch, and tears of frustration prick my eyes. My body is betraying me, craving something I despise, something I fear.

I take another sip of coffee, clutching the mug tightly to give my hands something to do. The warmth of the cup does little to ease the icy fear settling in my chest. I’m terrified—terrified of the way my body will soon crave Adam’s knot, how the Heat will force me into a frenzied state where I might accept his touch if he’s near. Maybe that’s why I keep seeing glimpses of him in my peripheral vision, why his scent seems to linger on the breeze, and why his face haunts me even when I close my eyes.

I shiver, the sensation of his gaze on me almost palpable, though I know it’s not possible. He’s never been to Eden’s house before—how could he possibly know I’m here? The thought of him here, in my safe space, sends a wave of revulsion through me, washing over me like a cold, unforgiving tide. I’m standing on the edge of a cliff, the icy abyss below calling to me, and the urge to leap is becoming harder to resist.

What’s one more dose, really?

I close my eyes, taking a deep breath of the fresh summer breeze in an effort to calm the storm raging inside me. The scent of pine and earth fills my lungs, grounding me momentarily.

The front door creaks open, and I force a smile onto my face as Shade joins me on the porch swing. "Morning, Kay Kay," he greets, unaware of the battle raging within me. Thankfully the wind carries my perfumes away from him and he hasn't noticed my scent change. Yet.

We sit in silence, sipping our morning coffee. The gentle creak of the porch swing provides a soothing rhythm, blending with the sounds of birds greeting the day.

"I missed it here," I say, finally breaking the silence.

Shade nods, pushing the swing slightly with the balls of his feet. "Yeah, we've missed you around here," he agrees, his voice soft and reflective. "You should start coming to Sunday dinners again, Kay. It's not the same without you."

"Did I just hear you saying something nice?" I tease, a playful grin spreading across my face. "I'm in shock," I add, raising an eyebrow.

Shade isn't someone who normally gets all mushy about feelings. His brows furrow as he meets my gaze, but he quickly masks his features, forcing a chuckle that doesn't sound genuine. Something is definitely up with him.

He's hiding something.

"Don't get used to it," he warns, but there's a warmth in his eyes that wasn't there before and guilt settles in my stomach. Whatever he is hiding from me probably isn't my business. Plus aren't I hiding something from him too? From everyone? I study his face, trying to read between the lines.

"Shade, what's going on? You never get sentimental like this."

Shade hesitates, his usually confident demeanor slipping just enough for me to notice. He’s not looking at me now, his gaze fixed on the horizon as if searching for the right words. The silence between us grows heavy, and I feel my heart start to race.

"Kay," he finally says, his voice unusually soft, almost fragile. "There’s something I need to tell you."

I set my coffee cup down, my hands suddenly too shaky to hold it. "What is it?" I ask, dread curling in my stomach. Shade isn’t one to hesitate like this. If he’s holding back, it’s bad.

Really bad.

He sighs, running a hand through his hair, a gesture so out of character that it spikes my anxiety even more. "I made a deal," he starts, his voice rough. "With Sean Cromwell."

My blood runs cold at the mention of that name.

Sean Cromwell isn’t just any alpha—he’s dangerous, cunning, ruthless. The kind of alpha who doesn’t make deals unless he plans to collect. The Cromwell pack is feared for good reason, their reputation one of violence and cruelty. The mere thought of Sean Cromwell brings back memories of whispered warnings, of deals gone horribly wrong, of bodies that vanished without a trace. Whatever Shade has gotten himself into…

It’s not good.

"Cromwell?" I repeat, my voice barely steady. "Shade, what kind of deal did you make with him?"

His eyes meet mine, and the guilt there is unmistakable. "I promised to help him become the new kingpin of the Hounds. And in exchange we'll get his help taking down Titus and securing the Den for omegas."

"Why not just tell Liam? He's a cop. He could put Titus away," I argue, desperation creeping into my voice. As I make the suggestion, I already know he would never get enough dirt on Titus to keep him in prison permanently. Especially with Michelle silently backing him.

Liam is Shade's best friend, a morally upstanding alpha. So no matter what he should be the logical choice here.

Shade shifts uncomfortably, his eyes flitting away from mine as if he can’t bear to see the disappointment or fear he knows is there. The weight of his decision hangs between us like a dark cloud, thickening the air.

"Liam’s a good alpha," Shade admits, his voice low and tense. "But good isn’t enough. Titus is too well-connected, too entrenched in the city’s underworld. Even if Liam could put him away, it wouldn’t be permanent. Titus would find a way to slip through the cracks, and he’d come back angrier, more dangerous," he says what I've been thinking and a shiver travels up my spine.

Shade’s words settle over me like a heavy weight, suffocating the hope I had clung to. Titus is a monster who thrives on power and fear, someone who has built an empire on the broken lives of others. And yet, the thought of aligning with Sean Cromwell, of helping him rise to power, feels like making a deal with the devil.

"Sean is an alpha of his word," Shade continues, his tone hardening as he forces himself to meet my gaze again. "He wants to be the kingpin of the Hounds, and he wants to rid the city of Heat. He sees it as a tool of control, something Titus uses to enslave others. He hates it as much as we do. If Cromwell rises to power, he’ll cut off Titus’s strength at the source. But he needs help to do it."

I swallow hard, trying to wrap my head around the twisted logic of this deal. On one hand, getting rid of Heat might actually save lives, free omegas from the grip of their worst instincts. On the other hand, it’s Sean-fucking-Cromwell . There’s no telling what kind of world he’ll shape if he succeeds in becoming kingpin.

"So, what?" I ask, my voice trembling with barely contained fear. "Are you going to pledge to the Hounds now? Swear loyalty to Cromwell and become one of his enforcers? A Hound?"

Shade’s reaction is immediate, his face hardening with a mix of anger and regret. "No, Kay. I’m not pledging to anyone. This is a business arrangement, nothing more. I’m doing what needs to be done to protect us, to protect Sterling. But I’ll never be one of Cromwell’s dogs."

"But it doesn’t work like that, Shade!" I snap, unable to keep the fear and frustration out of my voice. "Once Cromwell gets his claws into you he’s not going to just let you walk away. He’s going to want more, demand more. And what happens when you can’t give it to him? Or when he turns on you like he’s done to so many others?"

His silence is deafening. He’s made his choice, but that doesn’t make it any less terrifying. He might think he can walk away from Cromwell unscathed, but deep down, we both know it’s not that simple.

"I just hope you know what you’re doing," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. "Because once you let someone like Sean in, there’s no going back."

Shade doesn’t respond, his gaze locked on the horizon as if searching for answers that aren’t there. And in that moment, I realize just how far he’s willing to go to protect the people he loves. He'll do whatever it takes, even if it means walking into the lion’s den.

A familiar, gnawing temptation resurfaces as my worries grow. I think about the heat stimulant, the one thing that has been my crutch through all of this. The thought of taking another dose seems more alluring than ever. Put off dealing with my heat until things calm down in my life.

What’s one more dose? Just one more time. Avoid my heat for one more cycle.

I’m not sure if I’ll be able to keep from falling off the edge. The cliff is no longer just a metaphor. It’s a looming, tangible threat, and the darkness below is growing ever more enticing.