Lord of Misrule (Below the Salt #8)

Chapter 11

T olin had returned to the hunting party, not sure things had really gone well between him and Kit. He’d felt her passion in the kiss, but after hearing her sad stories, he felt like an ogre for having handed out a punishment to her and Parker to begin with. He’d hunted mainly by himself today, but had been too distracted to focus on catching anything but small game.

“It’s getting dark. We won’t catch much more today,” said Rook, as the hunting party joined together. Between them they had managed to kill a few rabbits, a dozen pheasants, and three wild geese. King barked, having been a good help in retrieving the birds when they fell from the sky.

“Yes, let’s get back to camp,” agreed Tolin, just wanting this day to be over.

“I’m starving,” commented Daegel, leading the way. “I hope Kit has a meal ready and waiting for us.”

“Me too,” said Rook, racing his brother back to camp.

“So? How did it go?” Raven rode beside Tolin, asking him about Kit.

“I talked with her. And kissed her,” he admitted.

“You did? So, did she like it?” asked Raven with a mischievous smile.

“I’m not sure,” he said, his heart going out to Kit. “Raven, she’s had a hard life. I am thinking about lifting her son’s sentence and letting them go back to the bakery, to their home.”

“Is that what you really want? To send her away? I thought you planned on getting to know her better.” Raven said the words that made Tolin question every decision.

“I do want to know her better,” he told his sister. “I am just not sure she wants to get to know me. At all. I think what she really wants is to return to her home and bakery. To make a good life for Parker and her sister. I can’t blame her.”

“Think about this long and hard before you make the decision, because you can’t go back,” she told Tolin. “Remember, you are expected to fill Father’s shoes until his return. It won’t bode well for him or for you or for any of the nobles if you let a thief go free.”

“Parker didn’t steal anything, I know that now and you know it too,” said Tolin. “He’s just a mischievous boy, that’s all.”

“I do agree with you; however you can’t take a commoner child’s word over that of a castle guard. It’s just not right, Tolin.”

“Well, what would you have me do? Put the boy in the dungeon?”

“Nay, of course not. Just let them serve out their time until the end of Twelfth Night as planned. Then when it’s over, make your decision if you want a relationship with Kit or not.”

“I never said I wanted a relationship with her. I just said I was attracted to her and wanted to know her better.”

“So, what does that mean?” asked Raven. “That you’re going to bed her and then forget all about her? The way you do with the rest of your trollops?” Raven didn’t give him a chance to answer. She rode away, leaving Tolin alone with his thoughts. He’d never felt as confused as he did right now.

The night was a long one. And cold. Tolin realized he never should have called for this hunt. They should have all stayed at the castle and continued to celebrate where it was warm and where the ale and wine were flowing freely. Rook hadn’t wanted to come on the hunt, but Tolin played the Lord of Misrule card and made him do it. Rook was also angry with Tolin for giving his pallet to Kit and her family. Tolin’s older brother had barely spoken two words to him the entire trip so far.

The sun had set and it was time for sleeping now. They had three tents. One was for Tolin, his brothers and Jarvis. The second was for the rest of the men of the hunting party, including Oliver. The last tent would be shared by Raven and Kit and the boy.

Everyone retired for the night and disappeared into their tents. That left Tolin at the fire. He stared into the flames wishing and hoping for answers. Life had been so fun and carefree up until recently. He hadn’t liked sentencing the boy, and he didn’t like worrying about Kit and her future. What the hell was the matter with him?

“My lord,” came Kit’s soft voice as she left her tent and came to join him. She grasped her cloak around her while her teeth chattered. “Will there be anything else before I retire?”

“Nay.”

She started to walk back to the tent.

“Aye,” he said, changing his mind. “I want you to come sit next to me by the fire.”

“My lord?” she asked in question, her eyes darting back to the tent with her son.

“Just to talk. Nothing more,” he assured her.

“Of course, my lord.” She padded over the ground, her shoes crunching the snow that had fallen. It had thankfully stopped snowing for now. Kit settled herself next to him on the log that served as a bench. Her teeth continued to chatter.

“Come closer,” he told her, holding out his arm.

She was reluctant to do so, but then did as ordered. He opened up his fur-lined cloak and pulled her next to his warm body.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“I don’t want you to be cold. Your teeth are chattering,” he told her.

“Aye, my lord. King is sleeping with Parker, but I will snuggle up next to them when I retire for the night so we can share each other’s warmth. Will you require the dog to return to your tent?”

“Nay, it’s fine, King can stay with Parker. Kit, I never should have commanded you and the boy to join the hunting party. I am sorry.”

She slowly leaned in against him and her chattering teeth finally stopped making noise, even though her body still shook.

“We have one more day and night of this?” she asked, sounding as if she felt doomed.

He chuckled lowly. “That was the original plan. However, in the morning I will announce that we will abandon the hunt and head back to the castle instead.”

“Really?” She looked up at him in surprise. The flames from the fire reflected, the flames dancing in her big brown eyes. “Won’t the others be disappointed? You’ve yet to bring down a deer.”

“Nay, they’ll be happy to get back to their families. After this, Rook will even be grateful to sleep on the floor in the great hall, now that I’ve given you his pallet.”

“Oh, please. Give it back to him.” She sat up straight and turned to look at him with concern on her face. “I don’t want to take anything from a noble. It’s not right.”

“If not a noble, then who?” he asked. “You can’t expect your pregnant sister to sleep on a bare floor.”

“Well, she was very grateful for the pallet, my lord.” Kit smiled, making Tolin’s heart soar. He would do whatever it took to make Kit’s life easier and to bring her happiness. He knew that now.

“I am very grateful for you,” he told her, giving her shoulder a slight squeeze, his arm still around her.

“Grateful? For me?” She looked at him quizzically.

“For your baking. It tastes good.”

“Oh.” She turned back toward the fire. “I’m glad you approve, my lord.”

They sat in silence staring at the flames for a few minutes, even though it seemed to Tolin like hours. Finally, he found the nerve to speak.

“Kit, I’ve decided when we return to Blake Castle, I am going to lift Parker’s sentence.”

“Really?” She sat up straighter, looking directly into his eyes. “What exactly do you mean?”

“I mean that you and Parker will be free and able to go home. There will be no more accusations against your son.”

“Oh. I see.” She didn’t sound half as happy about this decision as Tolin thought she’d be. He’d only wanted to make her smile, but she wasn’t smiling anymore.

“That is what you wanted, right? To go home?” he asked her. “To go back to work in your bakery?”

“Yes, I suppose it is,” she said, looking down and wringing her hands together. Tolin didn’t understand this reaction at all. Then she yawned and slowly leaned her body against his again. Her head lowered against his chest as they continued to stare at the fire without talking. They sat in silence for a long time. Too long. Tolin thought he’d better take this opportunity to tell Kit how he really felt about her, after all. This might be the only chance he had if she planned on going back to town on the morrow.

“Kit, I like you. Actually, it is more than like. A lot more,” he told her.

He thought he heard a slight moan from her but she didn’t move and didn’t answer. It unnerved him, but at least she didn’t get up and walk away.

“I know you are just a commoner, and I am a noble and we don’t belong together.”

No response.

Tolin continued. “But when I kiss you, I forget all about who you are. All I know is that you make me feel different than the way I’ve felt with any other woman I’ve been with. I want to do so much more with you than just kiss.” He suddenly realized this was making him sound like a lustful cur. “Wait. Let me explain that better. I don’t want to just love you and leave you, is what I mean. You deserve better than that. You have been through too much hardship in your life, and you don’t need me creating more. Right?” Tolin stumbled over his words, wondering how he could be making such a mess of this.

Still, she didn’t answer.

“Kit? Say something, please.” He leaned forward to look in her eyes and that is when he realized she had fallen asleep lying up against him.

He smiled to himself, almost glad she hadn’t heard him. He wasn’t good at expressing himself and felt like a fumbling fool right now. If she had heard what he’d just said, she would probably really hate him and he couldn’t blame her. God’s eyes, why was it so hard to tell her how he really felt about her? Why couldn’t he just say that he thinks about her constantly and wasn’t sure what he’d do without her?

He reached over and kissed her atop the head. “Sweet dreams, my lovely lady,” he whispered, knowing she wasn’t really a lady, but to him she was so much more.

Tolin scooped her up into his arms and carried her back to her tent, his eyes focused on her angelic face as she slumbered. He ducked and entered the tent. King looked up, but didn’t come over to greet him. The dog was under the blanket and Parker had his arms around the hound. It was innocent and precious and he’d never seen anything like it. He didn’t want to disturb this, but he also didn’t want Kit to have to sleep without a covering. Tolin laid her down next to Parker, then removed his cloak and covered her with it before turning to leave the tent.

“Did you tell her?” came Raven’s sleepy voice from the dark inside the tent.

“I told her,” said Tolin, not pointing out that even though he’d tried to tell Kit how much she meant to him, she hadn’t heard a word of it. “Go back to sleep, Raven. We head back to Blake Castle first thing in the morning.”