Love Me Reckless (Love Me Dangerous #2)

Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty-Four

KIRILEE

I sit on the couch with the cordless phone in my lap, the fire crackling in the hearth. As the flames leap higher, warming the cozy living room, reality creeps in.

I’ve just put my family in a perilous position. I’m sure lots of people are angry with me right now. My parents and their longtime friends, and of course Birch and his family.

The word is going to get out soon that Kirilee St. Claire ran from the altar.

A giddy little chirp escapes my lips, but the elation that comes with it dies quickly.

Though I stand by my actions, this is far from over. Now comes the hard part—defending myself.

After a deep breath for courage, I dial my dad’s cell number.

“Hello?”

His voice is tense and harsh. “It’s me, Dad.”

“Kirilee, what have you done?”

I wince. “I… just wanted you to know that I’m okay.”

“Where are you? ”

“Let me talk to Mom,” I say to cut him off.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible,” he says. “She’s in the bridal suite with the paramedics.”

Panic spikes under my skin. “What? What happened?”

“She collapsed, Kirilee, thanks to you.”

I hug my middle with my free hand while his hurtful words echo through my mind. “She needs help, Dad.”

“No, she needs her daughter to stop causing her so much stress.”

An awful sense of shame is creeping into my mind, but I shake my head like I can force it back. “That’s not fair.”

“You cannot just walk away from your responsibilities like this!” he barks.

Heat flares in my belly. “I’m not marrying Birch.”

“You know what’s at stake, Kirilee. This isn’t just about you.”

I swallow hard. “Indeed.”

“Come back and finish this.” His voice has softened some, no doubt because he’s misinterpreted my reply. He’s right—but that’s been the problem all along.

“I’m sorry I’ve let you and Mom down,” I say.

“Kirilee—”

I hang up before he can finish.

After several cooling breaths, I dial Grayson’s number and fiddle with the layer of taffeta on my dress while I wait for him to answer. He’s probably with Mom. A pang of guilt rocks through me. I hate that my actions could cause her so much suffering, but is there a limit to how much of myself I have to sacrifice to make her well?

“Kirilee, is that you?” Grayson whispers. I hear the swish of fabric and the soft click of a door.

“I’m sorry, Gray.” Emotions rise up inside me like a swarm of bees. “I know I’ve made a giant mess for you.”

“You’re okay?” He sounds calm. I release a sigh of relief. If Grayson isn’t upset with me, maybe there’s a ray of hope.

“Yeah. How’s Mom?”

“They’re going to transport her. I thought she was just… ov erwhelmed. But it’s more than that. Her blood pressure was extremely high, and they couldn’t find a vein for an IV to give her fluids. I overheard one of the medics discussing something about an irregular heartbeat.”

“She’s not eating. I was going to talk to you and Dad. I should have—” The guilt inside me burns hotter, making my voice catch.

“Hey,” he interrupts. “This isn’t your fault. We both know what she’s been doing to herself.”

What my dad said rattles around in my mind. “I wish she’d talk to us.”

“Maybe now she will.”

“Okay.” I cling to this.

“I’m proud of you,” Grayson says.

A laugh escapes my lips. “For running away?”

“For standing up for yourself.”

“Even though it’s going to ruin everything?”

“You’re giving yourself too much credit,” he says with a laugh. “We’ll find a way through this.”

“What if we can’t?”

“Maybe this is just the opening we need to get Dad to consider some of my ideas. Have faith, okay?” In the background are clicks and snaps—like the medics are getting things ready. “Do you want me to talk to Birch?”

I huff a cooling breath. “No. I will. When I’m ready.”

“Do you need anything from the ranch?” The logs in the hearth shift, sending up a burst of sparks.

“No. My friends are taking good care of me.”

“I thought so. Does that include a certain ski lift mechanic?”

My face heats. “Remember when you called him ‘not our people?’”

He curses. “I said that?”

“You were just trying to protect me, but… you were right. He’s not.”

“I don’t understand. ”

Just then, Sawyer steps in from the deck. The lights from outside illuminate his profile—the broad chest and strong shoulders, the agile way he moves.

“He sees me, Gray.”

Sawyer walks through the dark kitchen to the edge of the living room, bringing him into the light from the fire. His calm brown eyes steady me.

“It’s about time someone did,” Grayson says. In the background, I hear movement and muted conversations. “I need to go, but I’ll call you soon.”

“Thanks, Grayson. For everything.”

We end the call and I set the phone next to me on the couch.

Sawyer leans against the doorjamb, crossing his arms. He’s taken off his suit jacket and tie, and his cream-colored dress shirt strains across his chest. “How’s the shitstorm?”

I try to smile. “Stormy.”

A series of car doors slam from outside. Sawyer crosses to the window and peers out the blinds. “Reinforcements. And pizza.” He walks back over to me and offers his hand.

I take it, and that same bright heat zips through me. Sawyer pulls me gently to my feet, the heavy fabric of my dress pooling around my shins. I slide my arms around his waist and lean into his chest. He releases a slow, soft sigh and cradles me.

“How’s that inner compass?” he asks.

I smile into his chest. “Still on course… though I can’t see where I’m going.”

He kisses the top of my head. “Keep following your heart, and you’ll get there.”

My tummy flutters. The heat of our bodies touching and the rise and fall of our breaths turns supercharged, like the air particles around us are humming, crackling.

I close my eyes as he leans in to kiss me. His lips are plush and firm, sensual. He holds the embrace a moment longer, sending a bright, hot wave of desire to my core. It’s as if he’s lit up every single one of my nerve endings and asked them to dance.

Footsteps crunch on the stoop outside, and the doorbell chimes.

Slowly, Sawyer pulls back. His eyes open to reveal a look of pure hunger. Then he reaches for my hand and leads me to the door.

My friends crowd the stoop, looking like misplaced Christmas carolers in their elegant clothes and long wool coats. The pizza guy hovers beyond, a confused expression on his young face.

Sawyer ushers everyone inside, bringing in a gust of cold air and so much noise my ears buzz. Zach and Hutch carry the pizzas and the rest of my order into the kitchen.

“We stopped at the store,” Ava says over her shoulder while unpacking grocery bags containing snacks, a twelve-pack of beer, bottles of iced tea, eggs, milk, cheese, and a package of frosted cinnamon rolls. “Everyone was hungry.”

“I should have ordered more pizzas,” I say with a laugh.

Sofie wraps her arms around me in a soft hug. “You holding up okay?”

I soak up the kindness in her embrace, and sigh. “Yeah.”

“I brought your things from the lodge, but don’t worry, I turned off your phone.”

I lean back to give her a look.

She smiles, then glances at Zach. “It was Zach’s idea.”

Zach shoots me a mischievous grin. “You deserve some privacy.”

Ava swoops in, and I hold her tight. “You guys are the best.”

Hutch opens the box of beers and hands them out while Zach hunts for a wine opener in the drawers and Sawyer grabs a stack of plates from the cupboard. It’s a little surreal to feel like celebrating in the midst of the turmoil that I’ve stirred to life outside these walls.

Sawyer catches my eye, and to my delight, he winks.

You have everything you need to change that, princess rattles through my mind. I smile back, then slip between Hutch and Ava, who are fighting over the ranch dip, and reach for a plate.

Once we’re sitting at the big table together, the conversation flows easily, though it’s as if my wedding debacle is an immoveable rock in the center of the current because nobody brings it up.

The wine is hitting me hard thanks to my empty stomach, but the buzz is softening the harsh voices running through the back of my mind. They sound a lot like my father, or maybe they’re my own—my worries and doubts trying to creep in.

Across the table, Sawyer seems to be watching me carefully while he talks with the others. I think about that kiss we shared, and his pledge to stay as long as I need him.

What if I never stop needing him?

A knock on the door makes my skin jump. Sawyer sends me a look of alarm before jumping up and heading for the door, flanked by Zach and Hutch.

From my position, I can’t see the entryway, but the voice that fills the house sends a chill over my bare shoulders.

Sawyer returns, his jaw set in a serious expression. “Sheriff Olson’s here. I think he just wants to make sure you’re okay.”

I push back from the table and gather the heavy fabric of my dress so I can get to my feet. My friends scramble to join me, and together, we walk into the entryway.

Sheriff Olson stands in his thick uniform coat, his weathered cowboy hat in his hands. “Evening, Ms. St. Claire,” he says with a nod. “I’m not here to poke my nose in your business. Just need to make sure you are here of your own free will.”

“I am,” I say. Sofie and Ava each take one of my hands.

“Your folks and that fiancé of yours are mighty worried.”

Fiancé . I fight the shudder racing down my spine. “I’ve talked to my father, and my brother.”

The creases around the sheriff’s eyes soften. “That’s good.”

“Thank you for checking in. I’m okay.”

He gives the group of people gathered one last sweep of his unflinching gaze. “Well, you take care,” he says, then turns for the door.

Zach follows him out, and I get one last glimpse of the dark street and Sheriff Olson clamping his hat back on his head before the door closes.

I exhale a sigh of relief.

We return to the table and our feast. My dress is feeling more and more like a weighted blanket but taking it off feels daunting. Like it’s an old skin I need to forcibly scratch off.

As if reading my mind, Sofie pours me more wine and Ava cracks open another beer.

“Do you think Birch will show up here?” Sofie asks.

I shrug.

“You need us to stand guard?” Hutch asks with a determined glance in my direction.

“No,” I say, shaking my head.

Zach returns, bringing a gust of the cool evening air that sends goose flesh down my bare arms. I’ve noticed Zach switched to water after one beer. It could be that he’s the one driving everyone home, but what if the sheriff warned him, and he’s making sure he’s sober for whatever is coming?

I put it out of my mind. Right now, my friends are gathered here with me. We may not be celebrating a wedding, but it’s a moment I want to cherish.

We finish off the pizza and veggie platter and half a bag of chocolate peanut butter cups, and before I can protest, the kitchen is shipshape and everything stored away.

My friends gather their coats, and I hug each one of them goodbye.

“Call me tomorrow,” Sofie says, squeezing me tight.

Zach is next, and I thank him for helping with the sheriff.

When it’s Hutch’s turn, he bear hugs me so hard I squeak. “I don’t exactly understand what happened today,” he says. “But you look happy, and that’s what matters to me.”

I hold onto him a moment longer, soaking up his kindness. He sets me back on my feet, and Ava wraps me in a soft hug. “I tucked some condoms into your bag,” she whispers in my ear .

I laugh. “What makes you think I need those?”

She steps back with a wicked grin. “Call it a hunch.”

My friends file out the door to a chorus of final goodbyes, and then Sawyer gently shuts the door, his serious eyes darkening with hunger. He gives my body a slow, seductive scan.

“Ready to get out of that dress?”