Mark (Next Generation Carter Brother #9)

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Freya

My brain feels like it’s swelling in my head as another wave of nausea hits me. My feet feel like lead as I make my way to the top deck near the pool. It’s the only place on the damn boat where there is peace and quiet at this time. Either people are inside in the dining hall, or in the patio area that is filled with chairs and tables.

Last night is a blur. None of it is completely erased but I’m only remembering snippets. And some of it, I’m pretty sure I dreamt.

My phone rings, pulling me from my thoughts. I swipe over the call button, and force a smile at my friend.

She bursts out laughing. “You look like shit.”

“I feel worse than I look,” I admit. “I don’t even know how it happens. I swear I’m not going to drink, and the next thing I know, I’m waking up with a hangover.”

“So you’ve not seen your Facebook this morning?”

“My Facebook?” I repeat, which causes her to laugh.

“Go look,” she orders, still laughing.

I click on the app, heading straight to my page, and my eyes widen as I see over twenty videos and nearly fifty pictures.

One catches my attention and I quickly click on it. My eyes widen when I see my mum standing next to me on stage, her arm around my shoulders. Both of us are each holding a mic and singing like our hearts depends on it.

“Oh my god,” I whisper, clicking on the next one.

It’s of me and Max, and just like the previous video, we are both singing our hearts out.

“Holy fucking Christ,” I rasp.

I quickly scroll through them, only getting a quick glimpse of who is in the video. But it’s enough to tell me there wasn’t a person here on this cruise that I didn’t sing with. When I get to the last of the photos, my eyes bug out of my head. Hayden is on her dad’s shoulders, and I’m on Maverick’s shoulders. Both Hayden and I are holding a gladiator stick and we are in the pool, battling it out.

“I’m going to jump,” I whisper, clicking back on the video call.

Summer laughs. “It was so much fun.”

“Fun?” I ask, my brows pinching together. “Why does it sound like you were there?”

“I was in spirit. Charlotte Carter video called me and I spent the night watching the whole show.”

Images of how drunk Charlotte was last night filter through my mind. “Does she know?”

Summer shrugs. “I think at one point, she forgot I was there. But as soon as she started snogging that hunk of a man, I ended the call.”

“Did I really sing with my mum?”

Summer laughs. “Babe, you sang ‘ Livin’ on a Prayer’ with her. It was so funny.”

“What was I singing with Mark to?” I ask, dreading the answer.

She nods, finding my anxiety amusing. “First one was Barbie Girl. The second song was Dolly Parton’s Island’s in the Stream.”

“Kill me,” I groan, slapping my hand across my eyes.

“It’s actually nice to see you let your hair down with someone other than me,” she admits.

I drop my hand to my lap. “I have fun,” I argue, pouting.

“No, you don’t. You spent years behaving like the person Danny wanted you to be. The only time you would drop the act was when you were with me. I’m pretty sure that is why he hated me.”

She has a point. “Speaking of Danny. He came to my room last night before karaoke.”

“Please tell me you kicked him out,” she pleads.

“Oh, believe me, I tried. The fucker came to me saying I’m the reason Esther is upset and I’m trying to drive them apart.”

She rolls her eyes, which is what I knew she would do. “He always was deluded. Wanker.”

“Yeah. And it wasn’t fun to hear that they were fucking longer than I thought.”

“What do you mean?”

“Remember the weekend I came with you to that hospital appointment?”

“For my screening?” she asks, remembering the scare she had.

“Yeah,” I whisper. “Well, he was with her that night. Apparently, he was that hurt I didn’t go to the party, that he slept with Esther for comfort.”

“I’ll fucking kill him,” she growls. “God, he made you feel like crap for the entire week, when all along, he was the one in the wrong. I even tried to get you to tell him because I felt awful I was the reason.”

I shrug. “It wasn’t his business. No one else needed to know.”

“How did you react?”

I shrug. “Normal. It’s not like I didn’t already know he was a wanker. I’m just sick of them bringing up old shit. The way they carry on, it’s like I’m the one who did them dirty.”

“I told ya, you should just reveal all the shit you know about them. Imagine how he will react to Esther sleeping with someone else, or that she, you know, lied about losing the baby that was never real in the first place. And she won’t like hearing that he was still trying to get you back when they were together. Fucking hell, she still wears that bracelet he ordered for you months before you broke up.”

A gasp echoes behind me, and I startle, spinning around. “Esther,” I breathe, eyes wide.

“I fucking knew it.”

“I’ll let you go,” Summer announces.

“Esther,” I call out, getting to my feet. “What you heard—”

“Is you trying to break me and Danny up. I’ve been telling everyone and no one has listened, but then you go and spout off lies.” She forces out a laugh, and it sends a shiver down my spine. “Are you really that jealous of us? How spiteful can you be? There is no way he would ask for you back when he had me. Your friend may believe the shit that comes out of your mouth, but it will take a lot more than that for me to believe it.” Tears slip down her cheeks. “And how dare you bring up my loss. Who do you think you are, saying I lied about it.”

I’m not going to comment on the latter because I don’t want to embarrass her by telling her how I know.

“I’m not trying to break you up,” I remark.

“God, I hate you! I really hate you,” she screams as a sob breaks through. “I’ve been telling everyone you’ve been trying to break us up. No one listened to me because little miss perfect can never do wrong. This is my wedding, and here you are, making up lies because you can’t stand that I am happy. I’ll make them see the truth. You will have no one and you’ll only have yourself to blame.”

“I’m not lying,” I scream, before giving her my back. I grip the railing, laughing without mirth. I take a few deep breaths before turning back around, meeting her gaze. “What did I ever do to you? Seriously. When did you stop believing me or being my friend?”

“When you took the man I loved,” she yells, and the veins in her temples pulse. “You took everything from me. My friends always ended up seeing you more than me. I got good grades at school, yet our parents paid you more attention. Nanna took you everywhere, yet I was always stuck at home. Then the one guy I liked, you stole from me. Now you can’t handle that I finally have him.”

My eyebrows pinch together. “What are you talking about? You didn’t even speak to Danny at school.”

She throws her hands up. “I told you I liked him. You spent the night helping me with my hair, and then the next day, before I could even approach him, you were kissing him in the bike shed at school.”

“You never said who it was,” I whisper. I remember that night because it was one of the last good memories I have of us. We had spent the night going over what she would say, then the next day, she brushed me off and wouldn’t talk to me. And looking back, I think that’s when the problems between us started. Danny and I had been in our last month of sixth-form. Esther had been finishing her GCSE’s around that time.

“He was never yours first. And everyone here acts like he was,” she chokes out. “Take back those lies, Freya. Take them back before there’s no going back. I will never forgive you.”

“If you want me to lie to you, then yes, I take it back. I take it all back,” I begin, my tone softer, calmer. I never knew Danny was the boy she liked. Would it have made me break up with Danny? Most likely, because I would have felt icky about it. She drops down in the chair, sobbing into her hands. I follow, taking the seat opposite her. “You know I’m telling the truth, though. But it doesn’t need to mean anything, Esther. It doesn’t. Nothing has changed now that you know. Nothing at all. And if I knew Danny was the boy you liked, I would have broken up with him. We made it official that day and started to tell people. I never meant to hurt you.”

“You’ve humiliated me. You’ve hurt me. You keep lying to me. And you are saying it doesn’t mean anything,” she whispers. “It means everything! He is my husband. He is my family. I bet you’ve been laughing about it behind my back all these years, knowing you had shit on both of us.”

“Stop and think about what you just said,” I order, ducking my head until she meets my gaze. “Yes, I’ve known stuff about you both, but I have never once used it against you. I’ve never snapped during all the times you took digs at me or caused an argument.”

“You were probably waiting for the right time,” she spits out.

“I’m pretty sure it would have been the day you exchanged vows. Or at your engagement party. I’ve had plenty of opportunities to blurt out the truth but I didn’t. Because you are my sister, and deep down, I love you. I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want you to feel like you’ve made me feel for the past couple of years. I never wanted you to know. And I’m sorry you had to find out this way.”

“You still hold all the cards. Every time he went back to you, it’s like you had a hold of him. Even after, he would always find excuses to speak to you. I can’t live without him, Freya. I can’t.”

I take her hands in mine. “You don’t have to. He’s not going anywhere. I can see he loves you too.”

“But not as much as he loved you.”

I snort. “We weren’t perfect, Esther. We argued a lot, and we both wanted different things. Was it out of the blue when he broke up with me? Yes. But after some time, I realised it was the best thing to ever happen. I never loved him the way you love him. And honestly, I don’t think he loved me the way he does you.”

She shakes her head. “If you told him you wanted him back, he’d jump at the chance. I know it. It’s why I’ve been acting so crazy.”

“Esther, no. That’s not true. I can only speak for myself, but even if you were never in the picture, no one could pay me to take him back. I also don’t get a vibe that he wants me back. All he sees is you. All this arguing and bickering is all for nothing. He is your husband and you are his wife.”

She wipes at the tears running down her cheeks. “God, I’m such a mess.”

“I’m really sorry you had to overhear my conversation. Truly.”

Her shoulders drop. “Can we just call it quits now? I promise to stop with all the Danny remarks. I just want to look forward to our future. I want to stop stressing about stuff. I believe you when you tell me you don’t want him.” She wipes at a tear. “I just want my sister back.”

I nudge her knee, smiling. “About time. I’ve been telling you that for months.”

“I mean, you do seem pretty serious with the hot guy,” she teases.

I shrug. “It’s not serious.”

“Oh, come on; you like him.”

I smile despite our earlier argument. “Yeah, yeah I do.”

“He’s never going to like me, but I don’t blame him. I really didn’t mean to hurt his sister. I know I can be a bitch at times, but it really was an accident. I deserved what they did.”

A frown lines my forehead. “What they did?”

“They broke into our cabin somehow and cut up all my bikinis and underwear.”

Inwardly I’m smiling because I have a feeling Hayden did that. “Maybe it was someone else.”

“They also broke every heel on my shoes in a way they were sturdy for about thirty minutes. Then suddenly, they would break and I’d be on the floor. It took me until the third shoe to realise it was deliberate. I checked every single one after.”

“Is that why you are wearing Mum’s flip-flops?” I ask, pressing my lips together so I don’t laugh.

She rolls her eyes. “Yes. I deserved it. Hopefully now they’ll forgive me and we can all go out to dinner or something. Like a double date.”

“It really isn’t serious,” I assure her. Even if it was, there is no way I’m going on a double date. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

She lowers her gaze. “Do you promise not to tell Danny about the stuff you know? I’m worried he’ll never forgive me.”

“Esther, I promise. He won’t hear any of that from me.”

“Won’t hear any of what?” Danny asks, startling us.

My eyes widen slightly. “Esther thought she lost her wedding ring but we found it. She was worried about you finding out,” I lie.

“Sorry,” Esther grimaces. “Freya was helping me look for it.”

“Why have you been crying?” he asks, then glares at me. “What did you say to her now?”

“Nothing,” Esther rushes out, and it gives me hope that the arguments will stop. “I got emotional about the ring.”

He watches her for a moment, searching her face, before he smiles with a nod. “Maybe we should loop it onto your necklace.”

“Trust me, it won’t happen again,” she assures him.

“Are you ready for breakfast?”

“Yes,” she replies softly, getting to her feet. She glances down at me. “Why don’t you join us?”

I wave her off. “My stomach is barely coping with the fresh air. Breakfast might ruin me.”

She laughs. “We saw your Facebook posts this morning.”

“I still can’t believe your mum went up there and sang karaoke,” Danny teases.

“You should see her. She has on a pair of sunglasses, and everyone who gets too close or speaks too loud, is getting snapped at,” Esther announces.

I laugh. “I may pop in after and see for myself.”

“All right. I’ll see you later,” she promises.

I nod, watching them go before flopping back into the chair. God, what a morning . Do I think things are fixed between Esther and I? I’m not sure. Our conversation gave me hope, but there are things that were said and done that I can never forgive. I can move on, I can compartmentalise it all, and maybe even forget. But I just can’t forgive her. What I am willing to do is brush it aside. If this ceasefire is real, I’ll go along with it, if only to keep the peace. Despite what others have thought about me, I don’t like the drama. I love witnessing it or reading it online, but I loathe it when it involves me. This may be a good thing. Maybe now Esther will feel secure in her relationship and see I’m not a threat to their relationship.

Yet there’s a tiny voice in my head, telling me not to trust it.

“I’m buying handcuffs at the next island we stop at,” Mark growls, startling me. My gaze follows him as he walks over to the chair. “Is it so hard to wake up next to me? I’m a joy to wake up next to.”

I roll my eyes. “You had your hands down your boxers and were stinking out the room with your farts,” I point out. “I had to get out of there to get some fresh air.”

“Lies. I’m a gentleman. I don’t fart,” he argues, taking the seat in front of me. “What did Cruella and her minion want?”

“Danny had come to look for her. Esther, well, she overheard me talking to Summer and didn’t like what we were saying. But I think we hashed it out and things are good between us.”

His thick, dark eyebrows rise. “Is that so?”

I shrug. “Not sure how long it will last,” I admit. “Did you really cut up all her shoes?”

He grins. “That was Hayden.”

“And the bikinis?”

“Probably Hayden.”

I laugh at his put-out expression. “You feel left out that you didn’t get to do anything, don’t you?”

“I got Danny drunk and ran up his credit card.”

My eyebrows pinch together. “When?” Because aside from an hour yesterday, we were never apart.

“When you were up on stage singing ‘Like a Virgin’.”

“It’s a four-minute song,” I point out.

“I did it in three,” he boasts. “I left him to find his way back to his room.”

“You lot are sneaky,” I reply, but there’s respect in my voice. “I don’t even remember him being there.”

“You were dancing on the table with Charlotte when they arrived.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose. “Is it like that for every night out you guys have?”

He chuckles. “Pretty much.”

I smile back. “Have you seen the videos on Facebook?”

He grimaces. “Look, I didn’t know they would edit it.”

“What? Why do you look like that? Is there something I don’t know?”

He pulls out his phone, messes with it for a minute, then hands it over to me. It’s not even his timeline. It’s his uncle Max’s. I click on the video, my eyes widening as Celine Dion’s, My Heart Will Go On echoes through the speaker. There aren’t any lyrics, just the tune. The video is of Max on a deck chair in the pool, wearing some sort of skirt and life jacket. I’m in the water, clutching his hands. “I’ll never let go, Rose. I’ll never let go,” he rasps before I sink into the water.

“Please tell me this didn’t happen,” I plead.

“Oh, it did,” he replies, taking the phone back.

“Why am I the one in the water and not on the deck chair?” I question.

“He wants to submit it as a short story from a male’s point of view.”

“Your uncle is nuts.”

“So are you. You are the one who tried to prove that both of them could have fitted on the damn door.”

I roll my eyes. “Are you going to Pig Beach today?”

“Yeah. You are still coming right?”

“I suppose,” I reply.

“Good, now can we go eat because I’m starving?”

He gets up, reaching out a hand, and I take it, letting him pull me up. “When are you not hungry?”

He sweeps me up into his arms. “Never!”

“Put me down,” I cry. “Why are you carrying me?”

“Because I can’t trust you won’t run off again.”

“So needy,” I tease.

And who would have thought it.

Mark Carter. Needy.