Master A-0011 (Garden of the Gods #11)

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H eat. Wetness. I was on fire as tingling prickled along my skin. I could feel the rise and fall of my chest, but I felt so far away. It was the wet pressure along my cheek, moving down over my chest that drew me from the dark emptiness I’d been barely existing in.

Color blurred as I opened my lids, only for them to fall. What I saw in the quick flash didn’t make sense. Dark hair. A man. He was next to me, but…leaning over me. Pressure. Wetness. The sensations had my head shaking back and forth as my legs managed to scissor through the need that was suddenly taking over. I’d felt it before. Before…what?

Touch. A finger dipped into the missing part of the muscle on my shoulder, and I gasped, my eyes flying open as if I’d been doused with ice water. I was on the bed and my robe was completely opened. Ethan was rubbing a washcloth along the side of my face and neck while he traced my scars with his digit. For the life of me, I couldn’t move. I couldn’t breathe through the primal twisting in my core.

“What is your name?”

It took a moment to process the question through his hard tone. “…I have to say it?”

“I go through too many slaves to refer to you as one. I want your name.”

Tears. They came, but I managed to hold them in. I didn’t want to say it. To say it made what happened real. It would make the screams return.

“ Slave .”

“Pearl.”

Ethan’s lips parted. Expressions were unreadable as his eyes left me and he paused for a long moment. “Pearl. I didn’t expect that.”

“Did you expect something just as ugly as me?”

There was no sarcasm or even pity in my tone. Just mere curiosity.

“If you’re ugly then I’m blind.”

“I would say you’re just being nice but…” I trailed off, knowing he wouldn’t lie to me through the perplexity in his soft words. He had no reason to. “I’m sorry for passing out. That’s never happened before. I think it was just too much, too fast.” At the trail of the washcloth along my neck, again, my legs scissored. It drew attention to not only his other fingers running the length of the scar inches from my breast but also to the heat and prickling that was consuming me. My hands flew up and I quickly pulled the robe closed. “I’m better now. I’m ready to continue if you’ll let me sit up.”

Ethan’s lips pressed together, and he put down the washcloth, re-opening my robe. His other hand went back, continuing to move down the scar towards my cleavage.

“Master.”

“Yes, Pearl?”

“I’m ready to continue.”

“How did this happen?”

I swallowed hard, my head turning away just as my eyes rolled. My hips arched and I fisted the comforter, needing more. Needing…

“Boating accident,” I managed. “I was twelve.”

Fingers traced my far jaw, bringing my face back towards him. The touch was so soft. So…unlike what I’d seen of him towards the other women.

“Tell me about it.”

“I…can’t.”

“You will.”

“No.” The word was breathless. “I really can’t. I don’t remember. I was sitting on the front of my father’s boat. Then, nothing. I…must have fallen in. I woke up in the hospital hours later. Barely. The first month is a blur. Doctors say I repressed the memories. They were too traumatic, I guess.”

Green eyes lowered to the scar he kept tracing back and forth above my breast.

“I see.”

“I can continue now.” As he reached the end of the scar, his palm brushed my nipple. A moan left me before I could stop it. Ethan’s eyes shot back to me, and my head turned again, this time in mortification. “Please, if you’ll let me get up?—”

Harder, he turned my face back to him.

“ Stop looking away from me . Don’t make me tell you again.”

“I’m sorry. I just want you to stop.”

“I truly don’t care what you want. I’m the Master, not you. Do you understand what that means?”

“Yes.”

A look I wasn’t familiar with crossed his face, fading as his lids narrowed. The way his gaze lowered to my breasts had my legs drawing up so that my feet were flattened on the bed. Again, my hips arched, and I caught myself before I turned away. To see him taking in my body so freely had tears blinding me. I felt humiliated. Disgusted, just like he should have felt looking at me.

“Master, can I please get dressed?”

“Has anyone seen these?”

Not only did his index finger trace the scar, but his middle finger lowered to join. I was back to gripping the blanket underneath me.

“Only the doctors. No one else.”

Slowly, he made a path back over to my nipple, circling the hard nub.

“What about these.”

My small cry couldn’t be contained as he gave a slight pinch between his digits.

“No one. I was never around many people. I’ve…never.”

“Never,” he repeated, quietly. Almost disappointingly?

Something flashed on his face and his fingers drew back as if the heat coming from me had burned him. Maybe it did. I was on fire. Confliction drew in his features, and he grabbed a new glass of amber liquid from the bedside table, finishing it all off in one long gulp. Immediately, his lip peeled back.

“I don’t drink. Ever. Ever ,” he repeated again. “Not just because it’s not good for my diet or routine, but because I become uncontrollable. I like control. I haven’t had that lately. The last few months have been off. I’ve brought you in to make me better. Pearl, you’re going to make this work. That means no more passing out. No more being weak. You have to be strong to survive with me or you’re dead. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Master.”

“Good, because you’re going to go in there and you’re going to kill and quarter that b for me. Not every time. Killing is my thing, but for learning-sake, you’re going to do it tonight. Your job, and the reason I bought you, is to look after me. I have a very strict schedule and diet. I have an image to maintain for the outside world. That means you’ll clean. Cook. Most importantly, you’ll do all the preparing. That’s the quartering. The butchering, if you will. All the menus, which I will approve before you finalize.

“Butchering? To…prepare…it? The food?”

Ethan scanned my face, putting back down the glass.

“The b’s , Pearl. I’m sick of ordering out. I’m tired of not having the control to keep what I want within my own walls. You’re going to prepare and cook them like a five-star gourmet fucking chef. Not just for me. For us . You live here with me. You belong to me. You’ll eat what I do. Is that clear?”

“Eat?” My head lifted, turning to stare at the bathroom door in horror. But it wasn’t a horror I could feel yet. The oil was twisting that fear with a warped sense of lust. “You want me to…cut them apart? To.” I swallowed back the bile. “To prepare and cook the b’s for you? Into fancy meals?”

“Stop singling me out. For us . And I will bring in a chef to teach you everything you need to know. You will make this role I’ve provided you your life because frankly, it’s the only thing keeping you alive right now.”

Ethan scooped behind my knees, spinning me on the bed, helping me to sit. For seconds, he didn’t move. He just leaned down inches from my face. There were still dots of blood along his cheek, but his jacket was gone and his collared, button-up was untucked and completely open. His body was all hard, defined muscle. It was pure perfection, not marred like mine. And as much as I should have feared him, I couldn’t when he was looking at me like I was beautiful. Like I was…someone worth looking at. I’d never been this close to a man, and this wasn’t just anyone. He was one of the most gorgeous men on the planet, and my body knew what he wanted. That did things to me I’d never felt before. It left my mind in dangerous territory with the ‘what-ifs’. What if the accident never happened? What if I had never been taken and brought here? What if…this lust transitioned to a hunger that would have him killing me? Eating me?

“You’re okay? No dizziness?”

I shook my head. “No, Master.”

“You’re flushed.” His fingers went to my forehead. “You can’t sit still. Did they put anything here?”

“Oil.”

“So, you’re influenced as well.” It wasn’t a question as he got quiet. “But you’re not acting like the others who were on it. You don’t want me. It’s obvious you don’t, so why does that make me want you more? You’ve never,” he mumbled, cursing as he kept his position. “You’ve never been with a man? Never been kissed or touched?” His hand shot up. “Don’t answer that, although… fuck . Pearl. Pearl. Why does that sound so familiar? I don’t usually enjoy virgins. Maybe it would be different with you. Or. No. I should help you up so we can wake the b . I know I should but…”

But a change was happening in my Master as he mumbled, and I saw it as the green of his eyes darkened. Seconds passed. A minute. His jaw repeatedly tensed as his face searched mine. He was back to dipping his finger in the hollowness of my shoulder, and for the life of me, I couldn’t stop breathing out of my mouth. The tingling that covered my skin made me want to scream. To beg for things I couldn’t begin to imagine.

“I can wake her. If you could move. You said yourself. You know… I don’t want this. ”

I went to scramble when Ethan’s hand flattened on my chest, and he slammed me back to lay on the bed.

“You should have kept quiet.”

“Master, please. Not this. Not with me.”

“ I know what I want . I’m not going to be miserable, skirting around you, Pearl. If I.” He stopped. “If we just get this over with it’ll pass. I was never good with rejection. I’m worse with temptation. My life is restrictive. Strict. I deny myself too much. When I actually do want something.” His hands hooked behind my knees, jerking me closer to the edge as he fitted himself over me. “I take it. It’s been months since I’ve wanted anyone, and fuck if I don’t want you right now.”

My head shook. “You don’t. Not really. You’re drunk. You’re influenced, like you said. That’s what it is. You’ll wake up tomorrow and wish you never—You’ll be sick when you think back on the memories.”

Had my voice cracked? The tears were sure there, even if I didn’t understand them. This ache in my chest. How could a void need and want so much? How could it crave something so stupid? Ethan O’Brien? He was what women dreamed of. Worse, he was a fucking cannibal, and he wanted me . To eat me? I should have disappeared like the other b . I should be running, but all I was doing was trying to stop myself from rubbing against him as he pushed his weight forward.

“You don’t know me, Pearl.”

“I don’t have to. I know the truth. How could you want to do this? How could anyone? I can’t even understand how you’re looking at me. Order me to kill for you. To cook for you, and I will. Just… stop .”

“I don’t want to.”

“Please.”

The sob did leave me then, and I couldn’t stop the tears that exploded out like a broken faucet, but with them, frustration was building. Rejection was a sure thing come morning. That was hard enough. That it would be with a man I couldn’t escape; Ethan O’Brien, no less, made it harder. That he could eat me was the sugar on top.

“I’m going to kiss you, and you’re not going to stop me.”

“What happens if I try?”

A small laugh left him, and his hands came up to each side of my face. His thumb mindlessly traced the scar along my cheekbone as his gaze stayed on my lips.

“If you try to stop me, I’ll take it anyway. Then you ruin any good memory of your first kiss. But you could kiss me back and make it something worth remembering. What if it’s great?”

“What if you bite my lip off?”

Ethan’s stare broke, and his gaze jumped to mine. The laugh that left him wasn’t what I’d been expecting. I had been serious, but for some reason he found it funny.

“I could, except I know I wouldn’t be able to stop, and then I’d be without another cook. I need you, Pearl. I need this to work. I’m losing my mind. You’re going to make me better.” His face lost all amusement, turning hard. “You’re going to do whatever you have to to stay alive. That means you’re going to kiss me, and you’re going to like it .”