Mated by Twilight (True Match)

Chapter 33

Leah

When Leah was young, she’d gotten her first period at twelve. Her father yelled at her for staining her khaki skirt. The other members of the church had two very different reactions. Some of them welcomed her to womanhood. The older women said it like it was a heavy responsibility; the older men said it with a look that made her uncomfortable. The other reaction, however, was one of disgust. Annoyed that it had even been mentioned. Blaming her, like she’d done something wrong.

And it was that second reaction that popped up later. When her brothers saw her used pads in the trash. When she wasn’t ready for her period and got it in the middle of the day. When she needed help because she stained her skirt. Every time her period came, her father would chastise, or outright punish her, if he knew about it. She’d been taught that it was something shameful and wrong. That men shouldn’t ever have to even hear about her period because it was gross and a woman’s shame.

And then her mates spent four straight days doing nothing but pampering her because of her period like she was in a five-star spa.

Massages and food on request and all the purring she could ask for.

She felt bad when the bleeding began to slow and stop. There was no way they would ever do something like this again. They were just surprised because they’d never seen a period before. As it kept happening, they would, no doubt, stop doing all this.

But then they seemed disappointed when her bleeding stopped.

“It’s over already,” Sollit asked, frowning when she came from the bathroom and set aside the unused gauze for her panties. “We were told five days.”

“I said three to five days,” Leah chuckled. “It varies.”

“Oh, well,” Tillos sighed, waving away the book he had been reading off his combot. “It was fun while it lasted.”

“Fun?” She laughed, surprised. “You two are ridiculous.”

They both embraced her. Sollit nuzzling her cheek with his, Tillos kissing the top of her head. She smiled, heart expanding in her chest. She loved being held by them. It was so warm and secure and wonderful. She embraced them in return, one arm around each of them.

Leah really couldn’t believe how incredible it was to be around her mates. How light and free she felt being held in their arms. Like she was flying. Like she was wrapped up in a warm, snuggly blanket and hanging in that wonderful position between waking and sleeping. Like she’d just had a hot, warm meal and was tired but not too full. Like everything in the world was good, somehow, and that it might be that way always.

It was an incredible feeling. Like nothing she’d ever known before. Thinking about it made her giddy, and feeling it made her toes curl and like she wanted to squeal for no reason. It was so odd that she didn’t even want to mention it because it made her seem insane even to herself.

When the three of them emerged from their room to join the rest of the troupe for rehearsals for their next play, she almost felt confident.

This time, she was going to have a speaking part.

Not singing though.

Though she was actually producing notes during vocal training now, they were shaky and uncertain and sometimes wildly out of pitch. But the fact that she could still sing for her mates reminded her that her voice wasn’t actually broken, and she could still do this.

But the days of pampering and adoration relaxed her enough that she thought she might be able to handle a speaking role.

The new play was Tillos and Sollit’s choice. It was a more modern avanava zero-g play that had become very popular on the planet but had not yet spread throughout the Coalition. So, it was proven, but untapped as far as the market went. A rare combination that excited Corvidair.

The play itself was a comedy – a good break from the tragedy of the sleeping queen play. There was a lot of physical slapstick, but that was handled mostly by Sollit, Tillos, and Skara. The role Leah had been given was a smaller one. She was going to be playing Skara’s little sister. She wasn’t involved in the slapstick, and her speaking roles were small. But her dry comments sprinkled throughout the general hilarity of the others were gut busters.

And since she was Skara’s little sister, she was only ever on stage with her. So, the more experienced actress could help her if she flubbed it up. That security, knowing that nothing hinged on her success, that things would still be okay without her, actually made it easier. There was no pressure, and it was just her dryly reciting lines. The more robotic and stiff they were, the more they fit in with the character, and thus the funnier they became.

She wondered how much of that was intentional. She hadn’t even heard of the part before being assigned it by Corvidair. Neither of her mates said anything about it, but she did think they might have picked this play specifically because they could give her the little sister role and it would fit perfectly for her current acting ability.

Skara said she had gotten better, but only insomuch that she could read without stuttering and sounding scared. She still wasn’t projecting a lot of emotion.

No presence, she said.

When she needed to do her costume fitting, she asked the guys to let her talk to Shorvi alone. They were reluctant to do so, knowing how uncomfortable he made her. But that’s precisely why she wanted to do it.

Shorvi was rude and unpleasant, but he was honest. He wouldn’t coddle her like her mates. And while she certainly enjoyed their devotion, the rehearsals made her notice what Skara was saying.

Tillos’ role was that of a businessman who was trying to help Skara and herself start a business with their inheritance. While he wasn’t as dry as Leah, he did get the occasional quip in that style. Seeing him do it, the difference between them, gave her something of an understanding of what Skara had been saying during her acting lessons.

Leah was just reading the lines.

Tillos was acting .

And Shorvi was the first person to notice her lack of presence. So, though he was just the costume guy, she thought maybe he had more insight for her.

Alone, she walked into the costume room. He had his back to her but tossed something over his shoulder at her without even looking.

“Put it on,” he said without preamble.

She did so without comment. The dress was pale pink and cute. The little sister dressed adorably, and it contrasted very hard with her lack of emotion and dull responses. The clash between visual expectation and auditory delivery was part of her comedy.

When Leah emerged, she felt oddly vulnerable in the poofy, frilly dress. Shorvi waved her forward to his stand and began moving around her without a word. It took a few tries for her to work up the courage to force her question out.

“Shorvi, what is presence?”

He didn’t even look at her as he went around, pinning ribbons and bright beads in place. “You don’t speak Standard now?”

Her face heated. He sounded so dismissive and judgmental even just in that absolutely passive aggressive question.

“I just don’t get it,” she muttered. “Like, how does one have presence?”

Shorvi sighed like he was annoyed, “What are you asking me, female?”

“I just don’t understand.”

“Clearly.”

“Like, I’m not trying to be presence- less . So, like, how do I get a presence?”

“It’s not a new pair of shoes,” Shorvi muttered, moving around to her back.

“Shorvi, please help me. I just… I don’t want to disappoint people.”

He poked his head around her skirt, giving her a wry look in the mirror. “And you think that’s how you get a presence? By doing your best to not disappoint others?”

Leah frowned. Her brow furrowing. Shorvi let out a long-suffering sigh, working on fixing a snag in her skirt.

“Do you think I care about disappointing others?”

“No,” Leah scoffed with a snicker.

“And do you think I have a presence?”

“I mean… I guess? You certainly stand out.”

“Precisely,” he smirked. “You can spend your entire life trying not to disappoint others, and do you know what you’ll get for it? Disappointment in yourself. You have no presence because you are trying not to inconvenience others with your very existence, so you are nothing. But if you spend your life trying only not to disappoint yourself and no one else, you have a much better chance of success. And the rewards are far greater besides.”

“So… presence is… self-confidence?” She asked haltingly, still trying to understand.

“It’s a start. Better than constantly walking around with your head down trying to make yourself small to please small people. People are going to dislike you either way, so why also dislike yourself?”

Leah snickered. “I think maybe you went too far in the other direction, Shorvi.”

“Why? Because no one likes me?” He finished, standing beside her, sharing a cocky look with her in the mirror. “Have you considered that’s because I don’t like any of you ?”

“I admit, I have not.” She inclined her head, grinning. “But I don’t want everyone to dislike me. I feel like maybe there’s a happier medium here.”

He tutted, waving her words away. “Ugh. How disgusting. Compromise is the bane of my existence.”

“Surprising no one,” Leah laughed, turning to him. “Thanks, Shorvi.”

“Does that mean you’re done pestering me now?”

“No. I’m sure I’ll be back to bother you more later.”

He smirked. “Ah. Look at that. You have a personality after all.”

Leah giggled. “So, what was it you said I should get from you when I found my voice?”

He cocked his head back, giving her a playfully condescending look. “Why?”

“Because.” She held her head up proudly. “I want it.”