Michael (Wild Men #8)

Chapter 24

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Michael

Emery and I fall asleep wrapped up in each other’s arms.

Before her, I’d never slept with a woman overnight. If I had a fling going on, I’d wait till the woman was asleep and then move to the couch for some space.

But with Emery, I’m not only spooning with her—I’m actually sleeping. And sleeping well.

I’ve had a lot of sweat-filled nights since my boat’s near-accident. Dreams no one should have.

And yet something about being with Emery makes my nights better.

But demons have a way of coming out, no matter how hard we try to keep them locked away.

“No! Dad, come home! Please!”

“No!” I punch at the fishermen on the pier trying to talk me down. “Leave me alone!”

“Michael!”

Who’s that voice? She sounds so familiar. So safe.

“Michael, honey. ”

I pull back from the men trying to get a hold of me and make me leave the pier.

One last jerk of my arm, and I’m free.

Oof.

I land on my ass.

When I open my eyes, I’m not on the pier. I’m on the floor of a room I don’t recognize.

And peering over the bed next to me is…

Emery .

Her eyes are filled with worry. Even in the darkened room, I can see her worry.

Exactly what I didn’t want to do to her. Make her scared like she is right now.

“I’m okay. I’m fine.” I struggle to get up, my hands still locked in fists and my legs coiled and ready to run.

Emery jumps off the bed and bends down to help me up.

“I’m okay, babe.” I’m more alert now, and I sit on the bed and lean against the pillows.

She sits cross-legged next to me and turns on the bedside lamp.

It’s a low light, and it casts a glow in the room.

“I won’t state the obvious and ask if that was a nightmare,” she begins. “But can I get you a glass of water?”

I put my hand on her bare leg. She’s wearing a t-shirt only, and if I weren’t in such a bad state, I’d roll her over and put my mouth between her legs.

“I have this dream,” I find myself saying. “I used to have it after my dad’s boat went down. But that was years ago, and the nightmare went away when I grew up. Until…”

I cut off, not sure I want to continue.

But Emery’s invested now. Her blue eyes widen, and her hand lightly squeezes my leg. “Until?”

“Until my latest scare,” I admit. “I’ve had close calls before out on the water. Every fisherman has. But this one snuck up on me. And I think that’s what made it so bad.”

“You mean the weather was worse than anticipated?”

“I mean there wasn’t supposed to be rough seas that afternoon. When we left, the ocean was calm. We were out searching for lobster when the wind just…turned. I’ve never felt that strong of a wind before. And I’ve lived in coastal Maine my entire life.”

“How did you handle it?”

“The only way I know how to handle something is to either avoid it completely or go full on. I couldn’t avoid this storm unless I wanted to lose my life and that of my crew. So, we turned in the direction of where land was supposed to be. Not that we could see it. I felt the panic setting in.”

I knew we had to turn back. I knew how dangerous the seas felt in that moment. And I knew that if I did make it back to shore safely, I would need to acknowledge something had changed within me. I could no longer live in denial.

“The worst part was that for the first time ever when I’ve been at sea, I lost my calm. Rough seas in the past? I just grew calmer. My adrenaline would kick in, and I knew I’d get us all home safely. But this time, something was different. The wind was louder. The waves were choppier. The land felt really far away.” I pause before telling her the whole truth. “I felt exactly the way I’ve always imagined my dad did the night Lucky Queen went down. The panic. The knowledge that you might not live another day. The panic,” I repeat. “And for the first time, I wasn’t sure I wanted to wake up the next morning and get back on the boat.”

Emery’s arms are around my torso now, and she kisses my bare chest. “It sounds terrifying. You must be really good at what you do to make sure you all made it back to land safely.”

I never think of myself as good at what I do. Fishing for me is in my blood. It’s not just a part of my life. It is my life .

At least, it was.

But now? I don’t know anymore.

Emery

Before leaving our little private bubble in the remote section of Wild Ranch, Michael and I have an early cup of coffee together by the lake. He’s in good spirits this morning, and I don’t mention his nightmare. It feels good to be outside with the sun hitting our faces.

We’re chatting away when my phone rings.

“Who could this be?” I reach for my phone. “I usually get texts instead of a phone call…” I look at the screen. “Oh God. It’s my ex-boss.”

I debate whether to let it go to voicemail as Michael gestures that he’ll walk down to the lake to give me privacy.

Oh, fuck it.

“Hello, Fred.”

“Hello, Emery. How are you?”

I certainly haven’t missed that nasally tone with more than a hint of arrogance in it. But I admit that I’m curious why he’s calling me.

Fred Slate is a powerful player in the advertising world. He’s one of those “come in like a lamb before he roars” kind of businessmen.

He and I worked very well together. I think I threw him off with my upbeat attitude, and he taught me so much about the business. I came in with raw talent, but Fred harnessed that talent and helped me to shine.

I owe him a lot. Professionally, I looked up to him. I did my work my way, but he was a mentor for sure.

Which is why being passed over for the promotion stung so much. Especially when he broke his promise to me .

“I want you back. Mountain Air Advertising wants you back.”

The breath leaves my lungs. “Um…it’s a little late, Fred.”

Most of me means it. But a piece of me, the piece that feels lost and aimless, is cheering.

“I get why you would feel that way. And that’s why I’m prepared to present you with an offer you can’t refuse.”

“Okay. What’s the offer?”

“I want you to take Steve’s position.”

My hand grips the phone. “Excuse me?”

He repeats his request.

“What happened, Fred? Because last we spoke, you made it ultra-clear that Steve was your top choice for the position.”

“And yet, we all make mistakes. Me included.”

“Okay, but…”

“Steve isn’t working out like I thought he would. He doesn’t have your work ethic or your drive, Emery.”

“And you didn’t realize that until now?”

“You weren’t just an employee but a darn good one. You fought for the company, Ms. Walker. You put everything you had into doing what was best for MAA.”

He used to tell me that. A fact that gave me false confidence I’d get the promotion.

“Steve doesn’t do the little things. Or even the big ones, if I’m being honest.”

“Uh-huh.”

“So what do you say?”

“What kind of numbers are we talking?” I ask him. “And what kind of autonomy will I have to make decisions?”

“I’m glad you asked. I’ve come prepared with all those answers.”

Fred starts rattling off what my raise will be, including double vacation time, a larger bonus, and then he reaffirms that I’ll have the control I’d wanted to make decisions .

“So all I have to do is say yes, and the position is mine?”

“All you have to do is say yes.”

I open my mouth to say I’ll take it. But the memories of how Fred chose Steve over me are still strong. And I don’t know that I can trust him anymore.

I can’t say yes.

But I can’t say no either.

“Can I have a few days?”

“Of course. You can take a week.”

“I’m grateful for this opportunity. I will think over this seriously.”

After we say goodbye, I sit lost in thought for a few minutes, my coffee getting cold sitting on the little table in front of me.

Why in the world did I not jump up and down and scream yes?

I’ve wanted this forever.

And yet, when offered the chance, I hesitated.

Something’s changed. And I don’t know if I can just go back to my old life without skipping a beat.

I stare down into my coffee swirling in the mug like it holds all the answers to my questions.

Eventually, I realize Michael is walking back to the cabin from the lake. I wave to him awkwardly, hoping he won’t notice my change in mood.

“Everything okay?” he asks as he sits down in the wooden chair next to me.

“Fine.” I blow out a breath. “So that was a surprise. My ex-boss just…” Oh, fuck it. I’m a terrible liar . “He offered me the promotion. The one I wanted. Turns out the person he chose over me isn’t working out.”

“That’s amazing for you. You deserved it all along, but I’m glad he realized his mistake. Congratulations.” Michael’s tone is enthusiastic, but I sense something else that he’s masking.

“Thank you. Although, I haven’t said yes yet. ”

“Yet?” His expression is blank. “But you’re going to, right?”

I look into his eyes like they hold my answers. Yep, I’m definitely losing it. I’ve known this man for less than a week, we’re engaged in a temporary affair, and I think he can help me make the biggest decision of my professional life?

“I don’t know,” I say honestly. “I was kind of enjoying not knowing what I was doing. It sounds ridiculous, right?”

“No, it doesn’t.” He covers my hand with his warm, large one. “I think you should do whatever you want, Mimi.”

“I’ll try.”

The problem is that I don’t know that I’ve ever truly done that.