Mistletoe Misses

Prologue

Maddox

M istletoe has been good to me, and tonight, I expect it will get even better.

My girlfriend Carmen loves the tradition and uses it to steal kisses from me every December. Since our first kiss under the mistletoe at my Nana’s bookshop freshman year, I’ve developed a profound appreciation for the fancy little plant. While Carmen doesn’t need an excuse to kiss me—my lips are available to her, any time anywhere—I’d never deny her the thrill of surprising me. After all, the twinkle that alights her face when she traps me is prettier than a clear night sky, the sun reflecting off fresh mountain snow, or a Christmas light show.

I once thought baseball, snowball fights, or decorating the Christmas tree were my favorite things, but that was before I discovered the love of the most perfect girl in the world. Nothing beats a kiss from Carmen Delilah Bennett during the holidays or otherwise.

To show her how much she means to me, I’ve designed the perfect gift for her eighteenth birthday. What better way to celebrate, just five days from Christmas, than with a mistletoe scavenger hunt? After solving the thirteen picture puzzles to discover where to find the locations, she can trap me under each mistletoe for as long as she wants. The night is hers and so am I.

My brother, Cooper, thinks I am stupid for choosing an unlucky number for our big date. But we’ve had significant moments at twelve places over the years, and I couldn’t ignore the gazebo. Everything important in Ember Falls happens at Loving’s Gazebo, named after the town’s most influential mayor. It’s the perfect spot for a night we’ll remember for the rest of our lives. Anyway, when it comes to me and Carmen, luck is a moot point. We’re soulmates, meant to be together forever, and no unproven superstition will ever change that.

I also expect our relationship to advance in more ways than one tonight. The other surprise I have in store for her will change our lives forever, and I suspect she’ll want to celebrate with another monumental moment. I’ve wanted her desperately, but since waiting until we were both eighteen is important to her, it became important to me. My friends and teammates tease me about being a virgin, but they’re just jealous. Carmen Bennett, the prettiest, sweetest, and most talented girl in Ember Falls, is mine, and that’s all I care about.

I’ve been planning for this day since my eighteenth birthday two months ago, but I’ve known since middle school that I would marry Carmen one day. We’d been best friends and neighbors since birth, but I didn’t think of her as more until I saw her playing ball with her brothers when we were nine. She wasn’t fragile and whiny about sports like the other girls in my class, and I respected her for it.

I fell for her hard after my Little League team lost the game that would have taken us to the twelve-year-old World Series. I’d been the closing pitcher, expected to shut down the other team for the win, but I gave up a walk-off home run instead. She’d been at that game and knew I’d be sulking in the backyard afterward. She brought over my favorite cookies—peanut butter with chocolate chips—and held my hand, coating my pain with soothing conversation about our beloved Red Sox. In a matter of minutes, I’d forgotten about the game from hell and saw nothing but her—and the Red Sox, of course. That’s when I set my mind to breaking out of the friend zone.

It took me three years to earn the boyfriend title. Now, three years after our first kiss, I plan to give her a birthday to remember and a little sparkle for her finger.

In my mind, she’s always been mine. Since I’ll be forever hers, the modest ring that means so much to me and my family simply makes it official.

◆◆◆

“One more to go,” I urge as we make our way toward the finale.

She’s been lagging and growing more emotional with each riddle solved and kiss given. I’d like to think it’s because she’s touched by the effort I put into this date, but something about her is off, and I can’t take credit. She’s less talkative than usual and that alone puts me on alert. I’m the reserved one. Carmen usually fills every lull in conversation with her melodic voice, singing or passing along random gossip or interesting tidbits she’s learned about the world. Yet, two hours into this magical night and twelve kisses down, the only noise between us is our boots hitting the icy ground.

Maybe the weather is getting to her. It’s frigid in Vermont this late in December, and she’s not the only one ready to cozy up somewhere warm. We’ll get there as soon as she says yes to the last riddle, and I get my last kiss.

“It’s the gazebo, isn’t it?” she asks, little puffs of air materializing outside her glossy, pink lips. “A heart, symbolizing love, and a ring. Put that together for Loving’s Gazebo.”

“Right.”

“I should have been able to figure that one out without the drawing. Mayor Loving was your great-grandfather, and I know how much family means to you.” Her hand tightens in mine. “It’s one of the many things I love about you.”

“I’m sentimental. What can I say? Come on.” I jog ahead and stand under the mistletoe I hung in the center earlier that day, but she doesn’t follow. She stops just outside, the festive string lights decorating the gazebo’s edges, casting her features in a somber glow.

“Maddox …”

I hurry down the steps to take her hand to pull her inside. It feels warmer under the lights until I see she’s crying. Icicles seem to jam in my veins, and I shiver with dread.

“What’s wrong? Tell me, and I’ll fix it.”

“You can’t,” she says between sniffs, and more sobs clog her throat.

Without more context about what’s upsetting her, I’m helpless and beyond confused as to why regret suddenly clouds her eyes.

“Please let me try.” I take her in my arms, hoping to comfort her, but she soon steps back.

“Maddox, I love you.”

“I know. I love you, too. That’s why …” My fingers slip inside my coat, and I fumble my Nana’s engagement ring in the tiny pocket, freezing in place when the words I never thought I’d hear escape her lips.

“We can’t be together anymore.”

“What?”

“I’m leaving next weekend.”

My hand falls to the nearby railing. “Leaving to go where? For how long?”

“Los Angeles … indefinitely.”

“You’re moving away from Ember Falls and me? Why?”

She hiccups and swallows down the emotion she’d let loose in my arms earlier, and her eyes harden with finality. “You love this town. It’s in your blood, but I need more than Vermont or even Boston can provide. And you want a big family. I’m not even sure I want to have kids.”

“You don’t want a family? Since when?”

“As long as I can remember.”

“How come you never mentioned it?”

Her head tilts like I’m stupid, and that’s exactly how I feel. “Because you would’ve tried to convince me otherwise, and I would have let you. Maddox, I have dreams and goals, and I’m not ready to set them aside.”

“You’re dumping a lifetime of us for a career that’s not guaranteed? Do you think a family would hold you back? That I’d hold you back? I’ve been nothing but supportive of you becoming an actress. I go to every singing gig. I’m your biggest fan.”

“It’s not that.”

“What is it, then?” I lean against the rail, needing support to keep from dropping to my knees.

“Maddox, you have my heart. It’s just—”

“Not enough.”

“I’m sorry.”

Sadness wavers in her voice, and I go to her, hoping I can change her mind. Every time I picture my future, she’s there. We’ve been together in one way or another our entire lives. I don’t know how to be me without her.

“Don’t do this, Carmen.”

“I have to. I need to try, or I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”

“What about giving up on us? Will you regret that?”

The lights reflect off the unshed tears in the deep blue pools of her eyes, and I’m drowning in them. I have no idea how she’ll answer. I suddenly doubt her feelings for me, the depth of our relationship, and my worth to her. For the first time, I doubt us, and it rips me in two.

“I already do.”

“Then don’t destroy what we’ve built.” I take her hands, and her forehead drops to my chest. A sliver of hope takes flight, and I spout off every idea that comes to mind, praying something will resonate. “I’ll wait for you. I’ll come visit often. We’ll be together as often as we can. Or I’ll move to California.”

Her head shoots up, and she separates from me again. “No.”

“No?”

“We won’t have the money to fly back and forth, and there’s too much of this place in who you are. I can’t be the reason you lose that or put your life on hold.”

A chuckle squirts out of me at the absurdity of that statement. “Carmen, either way, my life comes to a screeching halt if you leave. This town means nothing if you’re not in it.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“I do.” My trembling hands scrub over my face with a sigh. I can’t believe this is happening. “I only love it here because it made us.”

“Maddox …”

“I want you to chase your dreams, Carmen. You deserve that. If you must leave town to do it, don’t leave me, too. We’ll figure out a way to make it work.”

Emotion chokes her as she shakes her head, mirroring me when I step closer. We do this ridiculous dance, cold, empty space growing between us until she turns and dashes into the darkness. The sound of my frantic voice echoes after her as all I’ve ever known and loved disappears.