Monsters Under Mistletoe

1. Fern

Chapter 1

Fern

I never thought I’d see the day that Santa Claus is played by a red-headed centaur, but as I look into the makeup artist’s mirror, I realize it’s here.

Dahlia’s , a luxury hair salon in the heart of Sunspell City, is hosting a charity benefit for children with juvenile arthritis. I’ve been ‘hired’ on as Santa, with a plethora of my friends as my helpers. When Iris originally pitched the idea to me, I told her she was crazy, but one of my medicinal magic professors said it would be good to put on my resume before residency. Dahlia Torres, the salon owner, apparently has a cousin with juvenile arthritis, hence her involvement in the project. Dahlia is best friends with my friend Iris’ older sister, who is also a professor at my university. It’s a small world.

Once our costumes and makeup are in place, we make our way to the front of the salon, where a giant throne-like chair sits, adorned with holly and Christmas lights.

I have a seat, Iris and Chrysanthemum flanking me to my left and right, and I watch as Daffodil crosses to the door, holding it open for the families and children who walk in. As kids walk, clomp, and stomp in, they stand in front of me and take pictures.

“You’re such a pretty elf!” a human boy shouts at Iris, who is now feigning the biggest smile I’ve ever seen.

Being an elfborn—a distant descendant of elves—her costume is probably problematic, but she’s wearing it like a champ for these kids. Actually, elves have more power than most magical races, so maybe it’s fine. I don’t have time to think about the societal dynamics of magical beings as I am forced to listen to a little serpentine ask for a life-size monster truck for Christmas. The funniest part? He demanded it be a BMW.

I’m fake Santa, not a freakin’ miracle worker.

I watch as Iris and Chrysanthemum talk to the kids, and I have to stifle a laugh at how absurd we all look. Iris is covered in tattoos, her face adorned with more piercings than I can count. Chrysanthemum has hot pink hair and a trans flag pin on her collar. Are we Froot Loops, or Santa and his crew? The world may never know.

Out of our friend group, Basil and Saga are the only ones not here. Basil went home to his parents, who live across the world on Alkebulan. Saga doesn’t have an excuse, though I’d bet anything she’s walking around our empty campus trying to accidentally bump into the girl she likes.

I don’t like anyone these days. Chrysanthemum and I have had a few drunk make outs, but it’s clear we’re better as friends. Iris thought Basil was interested in me, yet he never made a move.

I don’t want my friends, though. At least, not romantically. I want something fresh and exciting.

Last semester I was really into this guy named Oak, but he’s long since graduated medic school. That’ll be me soon. Not a paramedic, but a full on Doctor. Capital D and all.

If only I could get some capital D for myself. Or V. Honestly, I don’t have a preference, I just want someone to hold my hand and kiss me under the mistletoe, y’know?

Sweat coats my gingery brows as I plaster on another smile for the next family. I look over to Dahlia, who is grinning ear-to-ear, but there’s a level of anxiety in her features that I didn’t expect from her. She, much like Iris and Daffodil, is usually confident and loud.

She crosses over to us and pulls Iris close, whispering something before returning to where she was previously standing.

“Mr. Claus, you might want to wipe your face with a towel or something,” the white-haired elfling says after he takes another photo. I go to use my shirt sleeve when Chrysanthemum stops me, dabbing a tissue against my skin.

Where she conjured the tissue from, I have no idea.

Iris leans close to me. “Fern, we have a problem,” she whispers in my ear.

“What is it?” I ask through gritted teeth.

She frowns. “The air conditioning is out. That’s why it’s getting so hot in here.”

Although it’s December, Magia Island is not exactly cold. On some days it’s chilly, but it doesn’t snow naturally here. It’s a tropical island, not the North Pole. Wearing a Santa outfit in these conditions is not ideal, especially when my legs are already covered by my coat.

I steel myself, mentally preparing for the next hour. I can do this. So what if it’s a little hot? I’ve been through worse.

More families come inside, all making note of the warm interior, but still excited and ready to pay for pictures with Santa. People tell Dahlia how kind she is for putting on this event, and they compliment my helpers on their beauty. Overall, everyone seems to be enjoying themselves.

Everyone but me.

My head throbs, my heart galloping in my chest, and I am slicked with sweat. I probably smell disgusting, but thankfully, none of the children seem to notice.

“Why aren’t you preparing for Christmas?” a little girl asks, her big purple eyes shining up at me.

Why would I be preparing for Christmas? Oh, shit. I’m Santa Claus. That’s right. “I,” I start to say, but my voice comes out strange. “I was—I went.” My words are slurred as I struggle to respond.

“Mr. Claus, are you feeling alright?” Chrysanthemum asks. I try to respond, but the warmth of the costume is overwhelming me. It feels like I’m spinning in a cloud of heat.

Everything starts to go blurry as Iris shouts. “Fern!”

Opening my eyes, I wake up in heaven. I didn’t believe in a god before now, but I’m grateful for whatever religion was correct as I stare up at the absolute angel hovering over me. His face is soft, his chestnut hair draping down in front of him in one long braid.

I want to—oh fuck. That’s not an angel.

“Oak?” I ask, my eyes finally able to fully focus.

“Yeah, you remember me?” he asks. His voice is gentle and sweet, like he’s afraid if he’s too loud, it’ll hurt me.

Of course I remember you, I think to myself. I have had a total of maybe four interactions with Oak, but each one was more unforgettable than the last. The first time we met was in undergrad. We were freshmen, and he had turned to me to ask if he could borrow a pencil. I told myself I’d never seen someone with such big, beautiful eyes.

We continued randomly seeing each other on campus but nothing substantial. That was, until medical school. I never really left Augury University, but Oak did. I’m not sure what he did for work during that time, but when he came back, he was different. Testosterone had deepened his voice, and his eyebrows were thicker. He was still thin, but there was clearly a bit more muscle under his uniform than he had before.

And I still could not stop staring into those oxblood-colored eyes. They were hypnotizing, convincing me I needed to be near him.

The paramedic program requested other medical students volunteer to be patients in their scenarios to allow the future medics to experience the ‘real deal’, or close to it. I volunteered, and without fail, they always paired me with Oak. I didn’t complain.

Actually, I think that’s why I kept volunteering. I wanted any excuse to get closer to him, even if I fumbled the ball every time. Not once did I ask for his number, or offer him mine.

I’m an idiot.

And now here we are. And I’m his patient. Except this time, it truly is real.

“How long have I been out?” I ask as I look down at my abdomen to see only a white undershirt. “And where are my clothes?”

“Your friend, Iris, said she couldn’t get the Santa suit off of you, so I cut it off myself. As for how long you were out, maybe six minutes? We were only down the road,” he says as he adjusts the blood pressure cuff.

“Is Iris okay? What about the other girls? And the kids?” I ask, worry filling my chest. If it was hot enough for me to pass out, surely it was hot enough for someone else to fall ill.

“Everyone else is fine, I promise,” Oak says. “Besides, if they weren’t, I wouldn’t tell you anyway.” He winks, and I swear I see stars in his eyes for a moment.

I sit up, my four legs folding underneath me as I look at this beautiful elfling. He’s all long limbs and lean features, and I could eat him up. Glancing around the room, it seems everyone has been sent out of the building, and guilt pangs in my chest at the thought that I may have ruined this event.

“Do you know what your name is?” he asks, going through the steps he should to confirm I’m okay.

“Fern Hallowhoof,” I answer.

“What month is it?”

“December,” I say, my eyes still scanning the room, avoiding his.

“I need to do a 12-lead. I’m going to have to have you lift up your shirt,” he says, and our eyes finally lock.

I blow a silent kiss in my mind to Saga and Basil. Although they’re not here today, it’s thanks to them I’ve gotten this muscular. They both play rugby, and they made me join their morning workouts in preparation for their next season. At first I moaned and groaned, but now I couldn’t be more grateful.

I look damn good.

Oak gets onto his knees, a sight I’d only ever dreamed about, and starts applying the electrodes to my chest and core. The coldness of his gloves touches my stomach as he sticks them on and runs his next test.

“Seeing how much I’m still sweating, I don’t think it’s heat stroke,” I say, and one corner of his mouth ticks up.

“No, I think it’s just heat exhaustion, but you were pretty dang close.” Oak’s eyes linger on the muscular panes of my abdomen for a beat too long, and I flush.

“No need to blush; I see shirtless men every day on the job,” Oak says boldly as he unhooks me from the EKG machine. “Though none as pretty as you,” he whispers.

If I was blushing pink before, I’m fully crimson now.

The other medic, which I had honestly forgotten about until this very moment, is a blonde satyr with thick muscular arms. She leans against one of the walls of the salon, holding a small cooler.

She hands Oak the blue box, and he gets out a cold towel, wrapping it around the back of my neck. Crossing over towards us, she gets out a water bottle and forces it to my lips.

“You should drink something,” she says, her voice stern.

She’s definitely my type. I love mean women. I also love himbo men, and witchy non-binary folks, but I barely glance her direction as I stare at the wall, trying not to act weird around Oak.

“Hey, look at me,” he says, and I follow his calm instructions. “Do you want to go the hospital?”

I shake my head. “No, I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Really. I’m good,” I say. Because I am. I just need a few hours in some nice cool air conditioning, and I’ll be fine. Physically, at least. Emotionally, that’s another story. The embarrassment of today mixed with my general loneliness stirs in my belly, making me nauseous. I crave affection and physical contact, more than I’ve been wanting to admit.

Oak runs a few more tests in silence before he and his partner pack up, my last chance at starting something with him fading before my very eyes.

I’m unsure if it’s the exhaustion, or the fear of rejection after this many years of pining, but I just can’t bring myself to say anything more than a polite goodbye.

The ambulance takes off, and my friends, alongside the owner, return to this section of the building and crowd around me.

“I’m so sorry,” I tell Dahlia, whose brows furrow at me.

“Sorry? Sorry for what? Honey, I’m sorry my air conditioning broke. I feel terrible,” she says, her loud voice echoing through the room. “Let me know if I can do anything to compensate you.”

Iris and Daffodil move closer while waggling their eyebrows at me.

“That blonde paramedic girl was cute,” Iris says boldly.

“Really? I thought the other one looked more like his type,” Daffodil says. “Although, he kinda stared at Fern like a deer in headlights when he first showed up. Almost like he didn’t know what to do.”

“He was just surprised to see me,” I say, defending Oak.

“Do you two know each other?” Iris asks, and Daffodil’s eyebrows shoot up.

Chrysanthemum crosses her arms. “Where have you two been? That’s the guy he had a crush on last year.”

“I knew I recognized him.” Daffodil grins at me, and although all three of these women are shorter than me in stature, sitting here like this, I feel small.

“Well, it’s too late now. I didn’t even ask for his number.”

Iris looks as if she’s about to growl. “For a medical student, you’re such a dumb ass sometimes.”

I sigh. “Yeah, yeah. Now help me up.”