Monsters Under Mistletoe

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

T he shiny wrapping paper crinkled under my fingers as I watched Declan sing a terrible rendition of “The Little Drummer Boy.” Our coworkers stood around him, transfixed by his charismatic performance, oblivious to the fact that instead of changing notes, he’d just get louder.

“Me and my drum. Rum pum pum pum.” He drummed his Santa sweater covered stomach in rhythm with the song.

The karaoke machine stopped playing, and our entire floor started to hoot and holler for more.

Mimi shouted, “One more song,” thus starting a chant that Declan graciously obliged by massacring “Feliz Navidad.”

As my work best friend struggled to follow the words scrolling across the screen, I grew more and more unsure of my little plan. I fingered the ribbon tied around the silver paper and sighed.

What am I doing?

Declan and I had been friends for a few years. Why was I going to jeopardize that?

Because you love him.

I shifted awkwardly in the rolly chair I’d commandeered from a nearby cube, unable to find a position that didn’t pinch my thighs. When I glanced back at my coworkers shouting lyrics in the middle of the room, I caught Declan watching me with a big smile. He waggled his eyebrows as he barreled into the chorus.

My heart thumped wildly. I wouldn’t survive if we kept on like this. Things had to be resolved—one way or another.

Either I confessed my love, and he was totally into it, or he rejected me, and I would die on the spot. Probably self-combust and leave a little pile of ash in Marcy’s cushionless chair.

I took a deep breath as the song ended, and Declan begged off another encore. There was a lot of booing, but he made it through our coworkers as they huddled around the machine to pick the next song.

“Did you catch the show?” Declan beamed down at me as he leaned against the cubical wall. “I was singing just for you.”

My cheeks burned, and I dipped my chin to let my hair fall like a curtain. “What about your adoring fans?”

He looked over his shoulder at Mimi, who was doing a pretty convincing impression of Eartha Kit while singing “Santa Baby” to her girlfriend. “Who knew she had pipes?”

“Last year, she brought the house down with that Mariah Carey song. Remember?”

Declan’s forehead scrunched, and he shook his head. “All I remember from last year was that asshole from marketing trying to kiss you under the mistletoe.” Looking around the room, he huffed. “Where is that douche?”

I shrugged, embarrassed to have ever given Ben a date. He’d been so nice when he took me to dinner, but one too many shots of Fireball at the holiday party, and he was trying to feel me up in the breakroom.

Thank Goddess Declan had been there.

“Shit. Sorry, Holly.”

I stood, desperate to get away. “It’s fine. You live and you learn.” Unfortunately, while most thirty-somethings had been dating for half their lives, I’d only been in the game for a few years, so the learning curve was steep.

Add another tally to reasons why growing up in the Old Church ruins any chances of normalcy in adulthood.

Turning, I made my way toward my office on the other side of the floor. The little reminder of my last attempt at dating had officially extinguished any optimism I’d fought to hold on to.

“Hey! Where are you going?”

“I’m tired,” I sighed.

“Oh.” Declan caught up with me in three long strides. “What’s that?” He jerked his chin at the gift in my hands.

“A present,” I mumbled, using the long sleeves of my green wool sweater dress to hide the package. It didn’t work.

I should’ve left it in my office.

Shoving his hands in his pockets, he chuckled. “I can see that. Who’s it for?”

His eyes stayed trained on the gift I’d made specifically for him, almost as if he knew it was his. But why wouldn’t it be? I wasn’t good enough friends with anyone else in the office to bring them a personal gift.

“No one,” I said as I rushed around my desk, desperate to escape.

He frowned and leaned against the door frame. “We already did white elephant.”

I shook my head, frustrated with myself in a way I didn’t understand. As I fumbled with my coat, Declan closed the door.

“Holly?” His voice was close, but I didn’t dare look up.

It had taken all my courage to stay for the party. Since I’d met Declan three years ago, I’d been to more happy hours and office parties than I cared to remember, but I would do just about anything to spend an extra hour with him.

Pathetic.

“Holly, stop,” Declan said as he gently took my coat from me. “What’s going on?”

Tears welled in my eyes as I looked up at the ceiling. Nothing was going as planned. I was supposed to swan in there, confident as all get out, and land my dream guy. Instead, I spilled coffee on my prettiest dress before I even left the house, so I had to change. Declan was MIA at lunch when I wanted to give him his gift, so I sat through the rest of the day dreading five p.m. By the time Monica from HR rolled out the karaoke machine and drink cart, I was a frazzled mess.

Swallowing, I finally looked Declan in the eye. “Today sucked.”

He huffed out a laugh and set my coat down on the desk. “Yeah?” Lacing our fingers together, he pulled me into a hug.

“Yeah.” I buried my nose in his soft sweater, relishing the smell of his cologne.

“Is there anything I can do?” His voice vibrated through me, sending a shiver down my back. “You cold?” He ran his hands down my spine.

“I’m fine. Just frustrated.”

Declan nodded, his chin bumping the top of my head.

We stood embracing for a few minutes, and the little voice that had convinced me to confess my feelings reared its delusional head.

He’s not doing all this because he doesn’t care. Even if he doesn’t love me back, he won’t be cruel.

“I made you something,” I mumbled into his chest, praying he couldn’t make out what I’d said.

“Oh, yeah?” he asked cheerfully, squeezing me against him.

“Yeah,” I croaked out. Taking one last deep inhale of his delicious scent, I dropped my arms, and Declan did the same.

The paper wrinkled under my fingers as I traced the glitter mistletoes. “It’s not a big deal.” Pursing my lips, I shoved the gift toward him.

“Thanks.” His face lit up as he admired the bow. “You’re a great gift wrapper.” Chuckling, he shook his head and pulled the ribbon off.

Is it my imagination, or are his hands shaking?

Declan cleared his throat and looked down at me with stormy gray eyes. “Thank you.”

“You haven’t opened it yet.” I toyed with my fingers in front of me, desperate to snatch the present away.

His long fingers slid under the tape and peeled it off. “I have something for you too.”

“Oh.”

He flashed me a grin as he carefully pulled the folded sweater from the wrapping paper. Setting the gift down, he folded the shiny paper and set it next to the bow on my desk. “Is this—”

“A sweater?” I blurted out. “Yeah. I remembered you saying you missed the ones your grandmother used to knit you, so I thought . . .”

Declan’s fingers tightened around the soft red wool. “This is . . . amazing.” He looked up at me and swallowed.

I shifted my weight, uncomfortable with the way he studied me. “It was nothing,” I murmured.

“I need to tell you something,” he said as he reverently set the sweater down.

“O-okay,” I stammered, bracing myself for the brush-off.

“I don’t want things to be weird between us, but I need to say this.”

Tilting my head, I waited for the death blow.

When his troubled gaze met mine, I froze.

This is it. Goodbye, Declan.

“I’m in love with you,” he rushed out, a whoosh of air leaving his lips after he spoke.

I was too shocked to speak, to move. This was everything I had ever wanted, and there I was, standing as still as a statue of the Moon Goddess.

Declan inched closer, his fingertips ghosting down my arms. “If you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I can’t go on pretending that you aren’t everything to me. You’re so smart and funny—”

I huffed out a laugh. “I’m not funny.”

“And so thoughtful.” His eyes darted toward the sweater, then back to me. “I know how long those things take to make, and you did that for me. All because I miss my grandma.”

“You’re my friend—” I said before I could process the words.

Declan’s hands dropped, and he took a dramatic step back. “Okay.” He nodded, taking a fortifying breath. “Friends.”

“No,” I shouted, reaching out and grabbing his arm. “No,” I said in a more even voice. “I want more than friendship. I want—” The words wouldn’t come out, no matter how much I struggled.

Declan frowned, his large, smooth hands pushing the hair from my face. “What do you want, Holly? I’ll give you anything.”

Everything about him screamed that he meant it.

I curled my fingers around his wrist and leaned into his touch. Shutting my eyes, I said, “I want you, but I’m scared.” The animal I kept on a short leash simmered under the surface.

“Is it because of your family?” he asked, his voice strained.

“No.” I turned my head, brushing my lips to his palm. His breathing stuttered, and I softly smiled. “Maybe. Working through all the programming they put me through has taken me a long time. I’m not even sure if I’m all the way there.” Frustrated, I rolled my eyes. “What if I can’t be the kind of mate you deserve?”

“Mate?”

My cheeks heated. “Partner. Girlfriend. Whatever.”

His posture relaxed as he moved closer, leaving a sliver of space between us. “You’re more than I deserve.”

My lips parted as I waited for him to make his move.

Only he didn’t.

We teetered on the edge of something scary, and Declan left it up to me to push us over.

But how?

Since leaving the community, I’d done just about everything I’d been told not to. I cut my hair, got a job, started therapy, and had sex. Life was simple—a series of checkboxes to complete until I was a normal person.

Only Declan showed up, and my path to a full life was abandoned. There was only one failed date and no more check marks that didn’t involve the very nervous man in front of me. I became a woman obsessed.

Apparently, I wasn’t the only one counting down the minutes until the next time we were together.

I shut my eyes to gather my strength and said, “Okay.”

A rush of air hit my face as Declan exhaled. “Yeah?” he asked. Warmth skirted my cheeks before his fingertips grazed my jaw. “We can go as slow as you want.”

I nodded, taking a step into his enormous body.

“Can I hold you?”

His timid voice tugged at something inside me. Looking up into his hopeful eyes, my doubts melted away. “I love you, Declan.”

He brushed a lock of hair behind my ear, his eyes searching my face.

I grinned at him, my heart feeling impossibly full. Pushing up on my tiptoes, I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull his mouth down to mine. It wasn’t enough to close the distance, but Declan quickly caught on. Dipping his head, he went the final twenty, and our lips met in a passionate kiss.

His hands cradled my face gently, tilting my chin up until my neck hurt, but I didn’t care. I’d endure every second of discomfort and more if it meant never losing our intoxicating connection.

Arching my back, I pressed my body into him, relishing the hardness of his build against my softness. Declan stepped back, sitting on the edge of my desk, drawing me between his legs.

One of his hands slipped under my sweater dress. His fingers spread wide, touching as much skin as he could.

“You’re so soft,” he groaned against my lips. Kissing along my jaw, he murmured, “I can’t believe you’re real.”

“Same,” I whimpered when he nibbled my earlobe. His teeth scraped against my throat, setting off a long-forgotten, animalistic hum in my chest.

Declan didn’t seem to notice. No, he was too busy exploring the expanse of my neck with his lips while his fingers traced the band of my bra.

Internally, I was begging for more, but that didn’t stop my body from tensing.

Declan froze. “I’m sorry.” His hand fell from my back and out of my dress.

“No,” I pleaded, locking my arms around his neck and forcing him to look at me. “I want this. I want you.”

He nodded but continued to withdraw. Summoning every last bit of courage, I grabbed Declan by the sweater and claimed his lips with a punishing force. The aggressive move surprised us both, but it didn’t take long before he answered in kind.

His thighs tightened on the outside of mine, locking me between his legs, which was more than fine. Cocooned in his warmth, I loosened up. Gentle caresses to my back made me arch into his chest, leaving no room between us.

The connection between us thrummed with an electricity I’d never experienced before.

Could he be my—

Declan spun us around, lifting me onto the desk. His fingers splayed across my thick thighs, and he parted them, stepping snuggly against me. Our kisses grew in intensity until I was dizzy and had to break away. I sucked down air as he kissed just below my ear.

“You smell so good,” Declan murmured against my throat, sending goosebumps down my body. Lifting the bottom of my sweater dress, he looked me in the eye. “Can I?”

“Goddess, yes,” I groaned, letting go of his hair so I could help get the bulky material off and out of our way.

My dress landed on the floor, and he said, “It’s too dark. I need to see you.”

He leaned past me and fumbled with the desk lamp. When the light flicked on, he leaned back, his eyes devouring every inch, roll, and mark like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

Tentatively, Declan ran his fingertips down my breastbone between my small breasts. “Better than I imagined.”

My skin flushed, and heat crept up my neck. “You—you imagined me? Why?”

An incredulous look passed over his face before he shook his head. “You can’t be serious, Holly.”

“I am.” I caught his wandering fingers and squeezed. “No one has ever looked at me the way you are, and I don’t understand it.”

Declan huffed out a laugh. “You’re unbelievable.” Dropping a kiss on my collarbone, he inhaled with a hum. “Maybe I need to show you how much I want you.” He fell to his knees, his fingers slowly roaming up my legs. “Can I?”

My breathing stuttered. “I—”

Declan watched me with a patient smile, his hands stilling, but not leaving my thighs.

I took a deep breath and let it out. “Yes. Please.”

“So polite.” Declan grinned, and his fingers continued their exploration, carefully removing my tights. Leaning forward, he brushed his nose against my lace-covered slit and inhaled. “Hmm.” His warm tongue dragged up to my clit, and he sucked it through my panties.

My back arched, and my legs spread even wider. I grabbed the back of his head, desperate to keep him doing exactly what he was doing.

He groaned against my pussy, sinking his fingers into my dimpled thighs. I rocked against his face, a deep, dark part of me wanting to cover him in my scent.

My panties were positively drenched when Declan tore them from my body and shoved them into his back pocket.

Before I could utter a word in protest or question, he was lapping up my arousal, devouring me like a man starved. His nose bumped my clit with every drag. He spread me wider, allowing him to spear me with his thick tongue as he rocked his fingers on either side of my clit, creating an unbearable ache to be filled.

As if reading my mind, Declan’s mouth latched onto my clit while two long fingers slid into me.

“Oh!” I screamed, throwing a hand over my mouth as my eyes darted to the narrow window next to my office door that faced out to the rest of the floor.

Our coworkers were still gathered around the karaoke machine, none the wiser. The only lights over there were the rotating party lights sitting on the makeshift bar, and the twinkling Christmas lights that Gary had strung along the cubes.

I reached behind me, trying to turn off the lamp, but when Declan nipped my clit, I gave up and shoved it off the desk.

No need to backlight Declan eating me out like I’m his last meal.

“Eyes on me, Holly.”

My gaze stayed locked on Greg dancing around, trying to weigh the odds that someone had already seen us. “But what if—”

He slapped my thigh. The sharp sting drew my focus back to him, and I was startled to find a whole new Declan staring back at me. Still smiling, but there was an urgency there I’d never seen before.

“I said, eyes on me. All you need to do is watch me eat this beautiful fucking cunt until you understand just how much I want you—have wanted you.” He twisted the two fingers in me, and I gasped. “Can you do that?”

I nodded, unable to get my mouth to form words.

“That’s my girl.” He winked and dove back in, sucking and humming while his fingers worked me until my thighs were shaking against his ears. His other hand massaged my ass cheek that hung off the edge of the desk, urging my legs wider until I was laid back, and he had access to every bit of me.

“Declan,” I whimpered as I came around his fingers.

He didn’t stop. Pulling his fingers from me, he rubbed my clit with them as his tongue moved down to my asshole. There was nothing tentative about his explorations, and I yelped, sliding up the desk.

Declan’s strong hands gripped my hips and pulled me back to him, only now he was standing, and my pussy met the absurd bulge in his slacks. “We can work up to that.”

I blinked up at him, and he grinned at me. The smell of my arousal filled the room, along with a scent that was all Declan. I’d never been this turned on or high off another person.

Pulling myself up and him down, our lips met in a passionate kiss. He grinded against me, building a new, more powerful tension that unleashed a part of me I kept buried deep down with potions and meditation.

My chest hummed as I shoved him back. Startled, he fell onto the small couch near the door. I prowled toward him, the crackling of magic just under the surface.

“Holly?” he asked, unsure, his smile a bit shaky.

I straddled his thick thighs, spreading myself wide so I could feel the hard ridge of his cock. “I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you,” I growled against his neck.

Declan’s hands spanned my wide hips, gripping hard as I rocked against him. Kneading my ass roughly, he kept moving as if he wanted to touch every inch of my big body. He slapped my right cheek, shaking it as he thrust up into me, the soft wool of his slacks rough against my swollen lips.

Swallowing, I leaned back to get a new angle. I wanted his cock, but he felt too good this way to hurry. There’d be time for it all.

“Your tits are—” Declan’s hands cupped my breasts and squeezed. The underwire of my bra bit into my skin.

“Small,” I moaned. I’d always been fat, but I was all ass and belly.

“Perfect,” he mumbled, pushing the cups down and sucking a nipple into his mouth.

I whimpered, my fingers twisting in his dark hair as I rode his dick through his pants. I felt hot, wishing I’d turned the temperature down earlier.

Declan bit down, and my instincts took over. Shoving his shoulders back, he looked up at me, dazed. My fingernails extended, biting into his shirt. I leaned forward, playfully nipping his neck until he groaned, his head rolling to the side.

His submission drove the beast in me wild, and my hips started to rock again until I was on the cusp of the most intense orgasm of my life. Declan thrust against me, moaning my name as his hands squeezed my ass, egging me on.

The taste of his salty skin made me hungry for more. A dull pain filled my mouth as my teeth lengthened. I opened wide and bit down where Declan’s neck met his shoulder, the taste of his blood setting off an orgasm that turned my entire body to jelly. Wave after wave of pleasure hit me as my senses became sharper, and I became more connected to the soul beneath me.

Mine. Mine. Mine.

It was pure bliss. I felt whole. Complete.

“What the fuck!” Declan yelled from under me, shattering the cosmic trance.

I fell backward off his lap. “I—”

His hand flew to the bleeding wound on his neck. “You bit me?” He pulled his hand away, and his eyes widened. “I’m bleeding.”

“I can explain,” I said miserably.

He squinted, trying to see me despite the darkness of the room. “What’s wrong with your face?”

My hands flew to my nose, which was stretching into a muzzle. “Oh no,” I muttered as I scampered back to where my dress lay crumpled on the floor. “I need to go.”

I yanked the wool over my body, my limbs shaking as fur sprouted from my pale skin. With little time to make my escape, I scooped up my purse and computer bag and made a break for it.

“Holly, I—” Declan yelled after me as I ran to the staircase closest to my office.

As I made it out of the building, I looked up at the starless sky.

A full moon? How did I forget today was a full moon?

Worst werewolf ever.