Naughty Elf: Humbug (Santa’s Naughty Elf Mates)

Chapter 3

Chapter

Three

H umbug had to admit it; Santa was a canny old bastard. Well, one of many of them, right? But this was a stroke of genius.

If Baxter—Bax—was a changeling, then he would never find a human mate. He would always chafe a little under the constraints of not being able to be fully himself. But if someone sent him an elf…well, then he could share every part of himself.

And Humbug couldn’t really bitch about being handed a huge, beautiful, tattooed wonder on a silver platter, either. Which he was sure Santa knew. The old fart knew all of his weaknesses, including that he liked his men huge and hot and not a little dangerous.

Which put a whole new spin on the deadline Santa had given him when he’d sent Humbug off, sounding like nothing so much as some sage in an old movie about the Greek gods.

“A year, Humbug. That’s how long you have to make your place where I send you. Or you will become a doll forever.”

Such drama.

But now he knew it was just a little added incentive for him to get his sexy on with Bax here and not get the cops called on his happy ass.

That would be a colossal waste of time.

“A changeling.” Baxter snorted. “Well, at least you’re original. I mean, why me, though? I’m not rich or anything. I make a decent living, sure. Do you have a thing for Saint Bernards?”

Humbug glanced at Sir Guffy, which was a hilarious name for a dog that big. “Not that I know of, though he seems an agreeable sort.”

Bax shook his head. “You are sunk really deep in this delusion, man. Is there someone I can call? Do you have someone who can pick you up?”

Aw, that was sweet. But the truth of it was he had nowhere else to go. So he forced a cheerful, “Nope. I’m stuck here. So you might as well get used to me.”

Now a thunderous frown swept over Baxter’s features again. He was incredibly hot, if not conventionally handsome. He had dark hair, cut short, he would bet, to tame the wave in it. His eyes were a smoky gray, ringed in charcoal. His nose was long and straight, his chin strong and stubby, and his body…

It was banging. Big and muscled and covered in tattoos that were wild. Ravens and gothic rose mirrors. A human heart dripping with pearls and jewels. One arm was covered by a black and gray fox surrounded by night-blooming flowers.

“I bet you work with fire, don’t you?” he asked.

Those dark, slashing eyebrows flew up. “How did you know?”

“It’s in your blood.”

Now Bax scoffed. “Sure. God. You really are a piece of work.”

“When you call your mom in the morning, ask her to tell you if you’re the same baby she gave birth to.”

“I will not.” Bax started out of the kitchen, but Humbug flicked his fingers at Guffy, who was going to be his partner in crime, and the big dog bounded in front of Bax, tripping him up.

“Ooof!” Bax flailed, and despite the fact that he had to outweigh Humbug by a good fifty pounds, he caught Bax before he could fall.

A little too enthusiastic there, Guff.

Guffy wagged and bounced as if to say, “I do good?”

He danced Bax around, trying to keep them upright. He was sagging by the time they staggered back out into the living room and flopped on the couch.

“Ugh.” He tried to wiggle out from under Bax’s weight, but he was pretty squashed.

“Sorry.” Bax levered up on one hand, and their faces were right there together, and he wanted to tell Santa bloody fifteen to just suck a Kringle toe, but that would be super silly. Because he wanted to kiss Bax. Badly.

So he did.

Bax’s eyes went wide when Humbug—and who named their kid Humbug, even their middle name—kissed him.

He grunted, having to work not to fall right back down on the man because he was so shocked.

Then those soft, amazing lips moved under his, hot and firm, and he moaned, the feeling shocking as hell.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t kissed before. Or had sex. He and his tattoo artist, Lukas, had been incredibly quid pro quo before the guy had gotten married. But this was…very different to that.

This was Humbug…and he was going to think of the guy as Gavin, kissing him. One hand slid into his hair, holding him there, the other hand on his shoulder, kneading him like a cat would.

He wanted more, he realized. Even though he thought Gavin might be deranged. It did seem as if he was a Christmas present right at this very moment, and Bax wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the proverbial mouth.

He slid to one side, his butt hitting the couch, and he pulled Gavin onto his lap, taking control of the kiss. He tasted Gavin with his tongue, letting them tangle together.

“Mmmm.” Gavin straddled his lap, rubbing against him as they kissed.

He heard Guffy go by, heading down the hall to the bedroom. Good dog. This wasn’t something he really wanted an audience for, canine or otherwise.

They rocked together, Gavin clutching at him, licking him, biting at his lower lip.

Panting, he pressed up, his cock as hard as he could ever remember it being.

“Bax.”

“Shhh.” He didn’t want to talk. He didn’t want to realize that this was a monumental mistake. It was Christmas Eve, and for a little while, he wanted to believe in elves in boxes and Santa and the heat between them.

Gavin searched his face, that bright green gaze so amazing, then nodded, diving back into the kiss the next second.

Better. He ran his hands down Gavin’s back to squeeze his tight little ass, which was firm and hot and the perfect size to fill his two hands.

“Uhn!” Gavin arched, his mouth leaving Bax’s so he could throw his head back, his neck right there for Bax to bite and suck at.

He took off Gavin’s shirt first, tossing the weird homespun thing aside. Then he touched Gavin’s skin, leaning down to kiss at the base of Gavin’s throat.

“Mmmhmm.” Gavin rode his lap, grinding against him. His worn, soft pajama pants were no protection for his rigid cock, and Bax reached down to touch Gavin, wanting to give him the same kind of sensation.

“Jingle, that’s good.”

“Jingle?” A laugh huffed out, which felt weird. He’d never been amused during sex before, but it also felt good.

“Yes. It’s like ‘wow’ or ‘woo’.” Gavin tugged his pajama pants down out of the way just enough to get a hand around his bare dick.

“I’ll go with ‘uhn’,” Bax said. And since that whole hand-on-skin thing was such a good idea, he lifted Gavin just enough to pull his pants down, then got them together, both their cocks in one hand as he stroked.

They moved faster and faster, and beads of precome started to ease the way as they grunted and moaned and sweat dripped off their skin. The musky scent of sex and man filled the air, and Bax breathed deep, taking Gavin in with every breath.

It seemed like hours and it also felt like only seconds passed before Gavin groaned. “Gonna. Bax. Gonna come.”

“Come on, then. Come on me.” He wanted to feel the hot, wet spurts of come on his skin.

“Fuck!” No more jingle. Just that hard, flat word, bursting out as Gavin came all over them, the heat and impact of it enough to make his eyes go wide, his body stiffening.

A harsh cry escaped him, and Bax came as hard as he could remember, his hips thrusting up, his balls pulled up tight and his ass clenching.

They slumped together on the couch, both of them breathing hard, the sweat drying on their skin.

“Damn,” Bax finally said.

“Uh-huh.” Gavin turned sideways to look at the side table. “I think Guffy ate the rest of the pizza.”

“That’s okay. He deserved the treat.” He felt kinda…sticky. “Wanna go take a shower?”

“Yes.” Gavin climbed off him, holding a hand down to help him up.

He heaved himself to his feet, and they headed to the bathroom, and Bax was not about to think about how weird it was that he felt so comfortable with this guy who had invaded his home and claimed to be sent by Santa.

In fact, he decided he wasn’t going to think about it tomorrow, either.

Now, the day after Christmas? All bets were off.