Naughty Elf: Mistletoe (Santa’s Naughty Elf Mates)

Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

MIZ

The human calendar year sped along compared to my years of toil at the North Pole. One morning, I woke to frost on the ground and Ellie begging me to take her shopping for Halloween costumes after school. Not that long after, there was snow on the ground and talk of turkey.

In Christmas Village, we had one focus all year long: the big night. I couldn't remember observing any other holiday besides Christmas Eve eve, the one day we could finally relax and enjoy a job well done (even when I wasn't done and shouldn't have been celebrating). Ellie's school celebrated so many holidays I didn't know of, like Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, Indigenous Peoples' Day, and Veterans Day.

I still didn't understand them all as well as I should. I helped Ellie with her history paper on Dr. King, Jr., and I loved all the fun costumes for Halloween, but Thanksgiving … I still didn't understand how American football fit, or why we had to eat so much food.

I could get behind the food, though I couldn't eat much at a time. My stomach was being smashed into my ribs by two MMA fighters constantly jostling between my ribs and my kidneys. I kept grazing on leftovers long after our friends left. Dru had made the turkey and dressing in our oven, since we had the biggest dining area on the three-season porch. The Taylors had brought side dishes, and I'd watched tutorial videos to make the rest. The green bean casserole, scalloped corn, and party potatoes were all hits. Cranberry salad, not so much. Everyone wanted the sliced jelly from a can instead.

The sliced jelly made a delicious sandwich relish, too, or maybe that was my weird cravings talking. I felt as big as a house already, and I still had months to go.

Ryan made me feel sexy, even with my body all stretched out of proportion. I was growing two precious beings inside me, after all. When I couldn't find it in me to give myself some grace, Ryan helped me see the beauty in my situation, if not my reflection. I loved him so much.

I still hadn't said those words, too afraid he didn't feel the same, would never feel the same. I didn't want to give up hope, so I kept my mouth shut.

Every night, the same dream pulled me awake. I became the elf figurine sitting on the corner of Ryan's desk once more, staring at the little spider who lived under his computer monitor. Every night, the spider grew to the size of a human hand and attacked me. As the statue, I couldn't move, even before the spider's paralyzing bite sank into my plastic coating. The world faded before my eyes, and my final thought before waking was, "Now Ryan won't know how much I love him."

December was colder and darker at the North Pole than in Duluth, but compared to the warmth of a few months ago, it seemed an unfair joke to play on us, especially when the snow all melted by December 10 and the meteorologists predicted we wouldn't have a white Christmas.

The closer it came to Christmas, the more excited Ellie became. When I asked her about it, her answer surprised me. I thought she wanted presents or the wonderful confections Dru and I planned to bake with her on Christmas Eve day.

"Our school's winter program supports the local food pantry this year. We're going to put on the best show ever, and people are going to donate so Alicia and her mom and little brother can have a good Christmas."

She made me promise I would give more canned goods than anyone else before she relaxed enough for her bedtime story.

"What kind of canned goods?" I asked.

She frowned at me. "Not tuna or salmon, cuz that's gross. But fruits and vegetables are good."

After she fell asleep, I researched the pantry donations online. As long as the food items were nonperishable and unopened, we could bring anything. I started a shopping list for boxes of pasta and rice, bags of beans and lentils, and jars of pasta sauce.

"We need to do something for Alicia and her family," I whispered to Ryan when I climbed into bed. He'd turned off the light, but I could tell by his breath he was still awake.

"Like what?"

"Invite them over for a Christmas party?" I brainstormed out loud. "Whatever we do, we need to make sure the kids get plenty of gifts."

"I have a better idea," Ryan said. "You can deliver some gifts to their house while the kids are at school." Alicia's mom Lettie worked nights, but she said to text her if I ever needed anything. I sent her a text to let her know I would stop by on the morning of the Christmas program.

Yet another Christmas hung in the balance, and I almost screwed it all up by being late to the most important event of Ellie's year, or to hear her tell it, her life so far.

I set every alarm I could think of to make sure I was across town in time to drop off the presents for Lettie and her family before the Christmas program. Then, I muted my phone because I didn't want it blaring with notifications during the program, and I almost missed everything.

My phone still vibrated with texts. Reality came crashing back to me.

"Are you on your way home? My meeting ended early, so I can ride with you."

He'd taught me how to drive over the summer, and I already knew I hated slick roads.

"I'm still at home!" I texted, though he probably heard my muffled scream from his upstairs office. " I'm so sorry!"

After a few laughs at my expense, some fancy driving on Ryan's part, and an understanding nod from Lettie when we dropped off the gifts but couldn't stay, we made it to the school on time.

She was right behind us, and I felt like a fool all over again. Alicia was in the program, too. Of course, her mom wanted to watch her performance as much as we wanted to watch Ellie. Together, we dropped off our dry and canned goods with the school administrator before heading into the auditorium, which was filling up fast.

Ryan grabbed us three seats in the fifth row.

"This has been a hard year," Lettie said, her voice low while we waited for the curtain to raise. "I really appreciate everything you've done for us. I'm off work over the holidays. I'm sure Alicia would love to have Ellie and Janey come stay with us for a night."

"It would be good for her to get out of the house for a couple days," Ryan said.

I nodded in agreement, but my mind raced ahead. She was talking about a time I wasn't sure would exist for me. After Christmas. My heartbeat rushed in my ears, drowning out everything else. I missed the rest of her conversation with Ryan.