Never Say Never (Haven Harbor #3)

Chapter 10

TEN

ALL APPENDAGES ARE INTACT AND IN EXCELLENT WORKING CONDITION

D aisy

Tucker takes a step closer, our mouths now only inches apart, and I am brought straight back to the bittersweet moment that I have never quite been able to erase from my mind. The way he took my face in his hands, the way my heart rate skyrocketed when he leaned in closer. I remember what it feels like when he pressed his lips to mine and how badly I wanted it.

Tucker’s gaze falls to my lips, and I know he’s remembering that day too.

My heart is thumping so hard in my chest that it almost hurts. It’s been 10 years, but I still remember that kiss like it was yesterday. And now my entire body is trembling with an intense need to feel that way again. I am hungry to have his lips on mine, greedy to ease the ache that I haven’t been able to figure out how to ease.

Finally, Tucker’s mouth descends on mine, and I feel lightheaded. With skill, his mouth moves over mine, and he groans into the kiss. The feel of his lips is perfection. It feels right. The kiss is laced with hunger and desperation, and it’s everything I have ever wanted it to be. My hands move to his chest, where I flatten my palms over his pecs, savoring the feel of hard muscle.

Tucker is kissing me like he’s waited 10 years to kiss me again. He’s kissing me like there’s nothing in the world that makes more sense, like he couldn’t have waited another second to have his mouth on mine.

He sucks on my bottom lip before pulling back and looking at me with an intensity I’ve never seen before. It’s like he’s seeing me—really seeing me and what we could be— for the first time, but then his eyes darken and his mouth crashes to mine again. There’s nothing gentle about the kiss, and when his tongue sweeps over the seam of my lips asking for entry, I give it to him.

His tongue strokes against mine, over and over like he can’t get enough. His lips are soft, but his mouth is controlling, possessive. I am kissing the boy I had a crush on and the man I didn’t think I could ever have. Everything around us fades away.

I tell myself to remember every second of this kiss, every flick of his tongue, but when he backs me up against the door, I can feel his thickening erection pressing against my abdomen and my brain short circuits. He’s hard for me. For me. I made Tucker hard.

Needing more, my hands move to his hips before sliding around to the curve of his back, eventually slipping under the hem of his T-shirt. His skin feels so soft and warm, and I remember every one of those summer days when I was forced to look at Tucker in his swim shorts and wonder what his skin would feel like. Now that I know, I never want to stop touching him.

A wave of goosebumps washes over me as I remember what Tucker said to me earlier… We’re leaving after dessert, Dais. We’re making our pact official tonight, before you can back out on me.

My need for him only intensifies at the thought. My hands grip his flesh while my tongue strokes the inside of his mouth, leaving no corner untouched. The kiss is frenzied and frantic and Tucker groans, his erection trapped between our bodies as he pushes me harder against the door of his father’s office.

It feels wrong to be kissing Tucker in here of all places but there’s no way I can stop. I’ve been dreaming about this kiss for a decade.

His hand moves from my hair and then he’s massaging my breast over the cotton of my tank top. My head tips back and I feel my nipple pebble under his touch. I breathe hard, squirming my pelvis into his thigh, searching for some much-needed relief.

“Jesus, Daisy,” he growls against my neck as his hand squeezes my breast then pinches my nipple through the thin cotton of my shirt. He sucks hard on the sensitive flesh of my neck, earning him a moan and most likely leaving me a mark. The thought shoots a lightning bolt of arousal straight between my thighs. Just the thought of being marked by Tucker is a fantasy come true.

“You taste so fucking good.” He drags his nose along the column of my neck until my eyes are on his, those blue eyes searching mine for a silent beat. It’s long enough for the two of us to be brought back to the present, our hold on one another loosening as we untangle from each other and take a step apart.

Biting my lip, I can’t help the laugh that escapes me. “Your dad would lose his mind if he knew what we just did in here.”

“Worth it,” he smirks.

Bringing my hand to the spot on my neck where his lips just were. I move my fingertips over the sensitive flesh and Tucker looks at me sheepishly. “You gave me a hickey, didn’t you?”

“Maybe,” he says, smiling now.

“Tucker, what I am supposed to do now? We need to go back downstairs and finish dinner.”

His eyes trail down my neck and then over every inch of my body before he reaches to the nape of my neck and frees my hair from the elastic band, gently shaking it loose with his fingertips.

“What are you doing?”

He drags my hair over one shoulder. “I’m making sure I’m the only one in this house who knows what we just did in this room.” With that, Tucker leans forward, pressing one last soft kiss to my mouth, making me dizzy, before he unlocks the office door. “After you, rebel.”

The sound of my old nickname falling from his lips sends a million butterflies fluttering in my belly. I’m senseless over just a kiss with Tucker. He has always owned a piece of my heart. He always will. What will happen when we take it further? But that’s too much to think about right now. I need to get back to dinner before someone finds us in here.

Tuck unlocks the office door and pushes it open, motioning for me to lead the way. I take a deep breath and walk to the dining room, rejoining our families at the dinner table. I take my seat, hoping nobody spots the mark on my neck or hears the hammering of my heart.

Tucker and I managed to make it through dinner without incident. Lucky for us, his dad was deep into a story about a very wealthy client he landed at the firm when we sat back down so he was too busy talking about himself to bring up the fact that Tuck had stormed away from the table earlier.

I had no choice but to follow him, my feet pushing me from my chair and straight to him in the kitchen. I had just wanted to make sure he was okay, just like he’s always done for me. He was there for me the day my grandma died. Again, when my parents had to put our dog down when he was old and blind and could barely walk. He ran his fingers through my hair then while I cried against his chest. I will always do whatever I can to make Tucker hurt a little less.

I finished my meal in silence, hyper-aware of the bruise on my neck. I’m not sure I heard a word of what was said at the table. Between worrying about the mark and replaying what happened in Tucker’s dad’s office over and over in my mind, let’s just say I was very, very distracted. As promised, as soon as we finished dessert, Tucker was standing up and apologizing for having to leave so soon. We said our goodbyes and then made a quick exit to Tucker’s truck. I slid into the passenger seat, still reeling.

This is such a bad idea. Was I delirious when I agreed to this insane plan of his? Every part of me is screaming that we are playing with fire, but still, I can’t say no.

“Do you really think it’s smart to travel all the way to Italy by yourself?”

Tucker’s question jars me from my thoughts and with a frown, I turn in my seat to face him. “I’ve been crazier places. I’ll be fine.”

He scrapes a hand through his thick dark hair, and the muscle in his jaw fires.

“What’s going on?” I search his expression to figure out what he’s thinking. “What’s bugging you?”

“It’s just far, Daisy, and you’re going to be gone a long time. Don’t you get homesick?”

“Nope.”

“That’s it? Just ‘nope?’”

There’s a crease between his brows like he can’t figure me out.

“I won’t be gone forever. And it’s not like I’m off the grid. There’s email, Facetime. I’ll keep in touch with my parents.” I explain, but that crease only seems to deepen. “What? Do you think it makes me heartless to leave home for so long?”

Tucker smiles casually, but the look in his eyes betrays him. “You could never be heartless. But you are stubborn as hell.”

“Thanks, I think,” I laugh. “Anyways, you’re one to talk. I recall a camping trip where you stayed in that ice cold lake until your fingers were literally blue rather than just admit that you were freezing. I’m surprised you didn’t lose an appendage.”

“Don’t worry, Dais. All appendages are intact and in excellent working condition,” he says, a mischievous grin taking over his stupidly handsome face. It’s enough to knock the air from my lungs.

“You are such an idiot, Tuck.”

He places a hand over his heart, looking at me with mock sincerity. “Aw, Daisy. You’re going to make me cry.”

“You, cry? You would never.” I roll my eyes. “You didn’t even cry when you left the gate open, and your dog got out.”

“Correction: I didn’t cry in front of you .”

“Pul-ease. You didn’t even like that dog.”

“And you did?” he says. “He yapped nonstop. And he shit in the house all the time. You try stepping in dog shit with your bare foot.”

The look of disgust on Tucker’s face makes it clear that he is very vividly recalling the sensation. He glances over at me, and we both crack up.

Tucker has always been able to make me laugh. When we were kids, we would laugh non-stop about anything and everything. If I was having a bad day or a hard time, I could always count on Tucker to cheer me up with a stupid joke or prank; it’s one of the things that I’ve always loved about him. He doesn’t take himself too seriously. He’s fun to be around.

That’s one of the things I’ve missed the most over these past years, since our relationship became so complicated. I can’t remember the last time we’ve laughed together like this. It makes me realize how much I’ve missed it.

It also makes me realize how this friends with benefits pact could very easily go wrong. I survived Tucker breaking my heart once, but there’s no way in hell I’d survive it a second time.

That’s why when Tucker pulls up in front of my house five minutes later, I lie to him.

“Briar just texted. She had a rough night and wants to eat ice cream and chill. Is that cool?”

Tucker frowns, then shoots me a curious look. “Yeah, yeah, that’s cool. Of course.” His fingers tap the leather of the steering wheel.

His hands are incredibly sexy, and even though I want nothing more than to go inside with Tucker and finish what we started in his dad’s office, I know I need to take a minute and really think about what I’m getting myself into. But it still really sucks.

I’m sure Tucker sees right through me. He’s known me forever. I’ve seen him in braces, and he knows what I looked like when I went through that awkward stage and cut my hair short and died it pink. So, I am well aware that I’m probably not fooling him.

“Thanks for the ride. Good luck on your road trip.”

“Thanks. I’m going to need it. I’ll call you when I get back.”

Call me? The thought of Tucker wanting to check in and reconnect after returning home makes my stomach feel all fluttery. But then I remember that he’s not going to be calling me because he misses me. He’ll be calling because of the pact. Because he wants sex.

“It’s fine, Tuck. Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you’re going to be busy with semi-finals coming up.”

“Yeah, I probably will be. It’s going to be intense. My schedule for the next month is going to be insane.”

“I’m sure it will be,” I manage to squeak out around the utter disappointment that I feel bubbling to the surface. I let myself get swept up in what happened between us at his parents’ place tonight. Tucker made it very clear that this pact he proposed had nothing to do with a relationship or with actual feelings, but here I am already letting myself think that he cares about me. When will I learn? It feels like I’ve been brought right back to the day he pushed me away a decade ago. “I better go. Thanks again.”

I reach for the door handle, but before I can push it open, I feel Tuck’s warm hand on my wrist. “Daisy, wait.”

I shift a little in my seat to face him, ready for him to tell me that he regrets the kiss in his dad’s office, and it can’t happen again. Just like the last time. “What is it?”

“Can I tell you something?”

I nod.

“I know you and I haven’t been super close for a while, not like we used to be. And I know I haven’t always been that nice to you. But I… want that to change. I miss the way things were.”

He gives me a half-smile, making it so difficult to be upset with him. I wish it was easier to ignore these stupid feelings I have for him, but when he says stuff like that and looks at me the way he is, I’m powerless. I always have been. Maybe one day I’ll be able to look at him without my skin erupting in goosebumps. It’s a curse to love someone as much as I love Tucker and not be able to have him.

“I miss the way things used to be too.”

I’m not sure why, but suddenly the energy in the truck changes. The air all around us grows thick, and Tucker’s gaze has been glued to mine for what feels like minutes.

“Tucker, you’re staring.” The words come out breathlessly and the way they sound surprise even me. Slowly, he leans across the console, so close that his face is inches from mine.

“Daisy. Close your eyes.”

“Why… what are you—”

“Close your eyes, Daisy-Cakes.” His voice is low and smooth.

My eyes flutter closed and then I feel his hand slide into my hair. His fingertips grip the back of my head, and a chill runs up my spine.

“I’m going to kiss you again if you’re okay with that.” His voice is confident, bordering on cocky as his breath breezes over my lips.

“Kiss me,” I whisper without opening my eyes. I lean over the console, a little closer to getting what I want, and that’s all it takes for his mouth to find mine as a wave of lust crashes over me.

Eventually, Tucker pulls away, his hand still tangled in my hair. “And Dais,” he says as my eyes slowly open. “Next time I won’t be able to stop myself from doing a lot more.

My chest heaves at the thought of being naked with Tucker, his hands on my skin, easing the ache between my thighs. Feeling the growing tension between us, I force myself to open my car door before he has my clothes off and I’m riding him in the driver’s seat. I say goodbye then slip out of the truck and up the walk to my apartment.

I’m still turned on when I climb into bed, and dig out my favorite toy from my nightstand to ease the sexual frustration that Tucker left me with.