Never Say Never (Haven Harbor #3)

Chapter 12

TWELVE

DEEPEST DARKEST SECRETS

T ucker

I crack a beer in silence.

Holden is out with Aubrey and the house is eerily quiet. Haven Harbor doesn’t get a lot of traffic, especially at night after the beach crowd has packed up and gone home.

I take my beer to the couch, turning on the TV, flipping through channels as I think about Jesse and his brand-new baby. Caitlyn gave birth not two hours after he arrived at the hospital—a healthy baby boy they named Noah, after Caitlyn’s dad.

The three of them came home from the hospital a day later, but Jesse is taking the week off work to be with his wife and son.

My phone buzzes on the couch beside me, and I pick it up to see a text from Holden.

Holden: Where are you, bro?

Me: At home. Where should I be?

Holden: If I were you, I’d be hauling ass to the Seaside lobby bar. Your girl is here, and I doubt you’d like what you see.

Me: My girl? Wtf are you talking about?

Holden: Daisy is here and she’s getting a lot of attention. Bunch of guys… they’re wasted. I’m keeping an eye on her, but Aubrey and I have to head out soon.

My jaw clenches.

Me: Be there in ten.

Holden: Good call.

I throw on a hoody and then head out to my truck. Ten minutes later, I’m walking into the Seaside Hotel, hoping that I look calmer than I feel. My stomach is in knots.

I swallow the ball of cotton under my tongue, wondering where Daisy is. It’s been three weeks since I’ve seen or talked to her. Twenty-two days since I marched her into my dad’s office and kissed the hell out of her up against the door. Twenty-two days since she kissed me back. And ever since then, I haven’t been able to get her off my mind. I’m like a starved man. By now, I should have forgotten all about the way she felt in my arms. But I haven’t.

I realize that Daisy isn’t mine, and that it drives her nuts when I act overprotective of her. I know she’s not interested in a relationship with me and to be honest, I’m not sure I’m the guy to give her what she needs. But the girl is in my head and knowing she’s out here with a bunch of drunk guys doesn’t sit well with me. I told myself a long time ago that I would take care of her, and that’s what I plan on doing.

The lobby of the hotel is quiet when I arrive. I walk across the polished Italian marble floors past plush velvet armchairs and uniformed bellhops to the bar. It’s dimly lit, the glow of crystal chandeliers reflected in the large mirror that runs the length of the room.

I immediately spot her. She’s wearing a short blue dress, her hair half-tied back with a thick, white ribbon. She’s perched on a barstool next to Briar, a martini in hand, her long legs crossed at the knee.

Holden wasn’t lying. There’s a group of dudes hovering around them, most of them looking really fucking intoxicated. My hands ball into fists at my side as I gauge the scene. I spot Holden sitting with Aubrey at a table several feet away and decide to check in with him before I do something I might regret.

“That didn’t take you long,” Holden smirks as I join them, taking the empty chair next to him with my eyes still on Daisy. “I figured you’d drop everything and bust it over here.”

I frown. “Any of them put their hands on her?”

“Not yet.”

Daisy hasn’t noticed me yet, so I take the opportunity to stare. She’s so fucking beautiful. The thin straps of her dress expose her smooth, tan shoulders. I watch her raise her drink to her lips, and the way her blue eyes sparkle as she smiles at something Briar says. She’s always smiling, and I swear it’s contagious. Even when I was in the worst mood, Daisy would just have to smile, and my face would mirror hers. I would instantly forget about everything else.

“So, what’s your plan?” Aubrey asks.

“I’m going to let her have her fun.”

“Okay,” Aubrey says, eyebrows raised. “You’re here as her bodyguard then?”

“It’s complicated.”

“That’s a fucking understatement,” Holden mutters.

Aubrey looks to Holden, then back to me, her interest piqued. “What’s the deal with you two?”

“It’s a long story. Daisy and I grew up together. I’ve known her forever. I just want to make sure she’s not taken advantage of by some sleaze bag.”

Aubrey is silent for a moment before she shifts her gaze to Holden, who’s reclined back into his seat, listening to me with a cocksure smile. “You could just tell her how you feel about her.”

I shake my head. “It’s not like that. We’re friends. That’s all.” My stomach churns. I know there is nothing going on with Daisy and me. I’m still surprised she agreed to it, but the pact is a short-term thing. It may get her into my bed, but nothing more than that.

I watch Daisy slip off her barstool, the corner of my mouth ticking up when she ignores the guy who’s trying to get her attention.

I tell myself to stay in my seat as I watch her cross the bar toward the restrooms, but it’s like telling a moth to stay away from the light; I can’t help myself. I’m getting up from my seat as soon as she disappears from my sight.

“Took you long enough,” Holden says, smiling smugly, but I ignore him, already well on my way to see Daisy.

My adrenaline is pumping when I watch her slip into the restroom. Leaning against the wall, I feel my heart rate pick up as I wait for her, and it strikes me that I’ve never been this excited to see a girl.

After what feels like forever, the bathroom door swings open, and Daisy walks out. Her eyes are on her dress as she straightens the fabric at her hips, but when she looks up, the energy in the air between us crackles. I take a small step toward her as she walks closer. Then her eyes—as blue as the depths of the ocean—land on mine.

“What are you doing here?”.

“Having a drink with a friend?” The moment the words fall from my lips, her expression shifts. Got it, her eyes say.

“I didn’t realize you had gotten home from your road trip.”

I flinch, knowing why her gaze feels like ice water running down my spine. I should have called her while I was away. Texted. Anything. I realized that after I got back into town, and honestly, I don’t even have a good excuse for disappearing on her. When it comes to football, I just get so deep in the zone that it’s hard to focus on anything else. But it doesn’t mean I didn’t think about her every single day.

We’re silent in the dimly lit hallway for a few heartbeats, standing two feet away from each other as I scrub my hand over the scruff on my jaw.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call.”

“I didn’t expect you to.”

“Well, I’m still sorry I didn’t.”

She glowers. “It’s fine.”

I know that scowl intimately. It’s the same one she wore the day I told her the kiss was a mistake and couldn’t happen again.

She pushed me away after that day, and she’s doing it again now.

“It’s not fine. I can tell you’re upset.”

Her jaw hardens. “Don’t flatter yourself, Tuck. I’m not some Tucker Collins groupie sitting around waiting for you to text me. We have a pact, we’re not in a relationship. We don’t owe each other anything.”

I swallow as my chest tightens. “Do you remember when we were 16 and I kissed you?” I ask, taking one step closer to her so that we’re standing toe-to-toe in the darkened hallway. I reach out and tip her chin up until our eyes meet.

Daisy closes her eyes for a moment and when they open again, I can see she’s fighting something. “Never in a million years did I think you would kiss me,” she says softly, like she’s back in that moment all those years ago. She looks sad, or maybe it’s regret. But we both stay rooted in place, her eyes locked on mine. I fight the urge to pull her into me and kiss her

“I wanted to kiss you that whole summer. It took me months to work up the courage. It’s all I could think about. I was so worried you wouldn’t even kiss me back.”

Her eyes widen at my confession. “I thought it meant nothing to you.”

“Daisy, it was everything.”

A million more words left unsaid hang in the air between us, but where do we even start? Years of distance has taken its toll on us. Daisy’s walls are built so high, I’m not sure she even considers me a friend at this point.

I wonder if it hurt her as much as it hurt me when I had to push her away. I wonder if she ever really understood the reason why.

But suddenly, none of it matters. I just want a second chance. I want to try again.

“We used to swim at night.”

“Yeah,” she says. “We used to spend a lot of time together.”

“When was the last time?”

“That I swam at night?”

I smile. “Yeah.”

“With you.”

Her answer surprises me. “Do you miss it?”

It’s a loaded question. Maybe Daisy can tell by the look on my face that what I really want to know is… Do you miss me? I want to know. No, I need to know.

“I missed it for a long time.”

What does that even mean? Has she stopped thinking about all those nights we spent together? Has she moved on? Her answer has my heart emptying out onto the tile floor beneath my shoes.

Then she lifts her gaze to meet mine, and I can see that there are tears in her eyes. “Why did you push me away?” Her voice is barely a whisper. If my heart was on the floor a second ago, it’s now been stomped over and broken into a million tiny pieces. I’ve never let myself think about how much I hurt Daisy years ago. It was easier to think that she was just mad at me. But the look in her eyes right now makes it clear that it went way beyond anger.

I never told her at the time what had happened after I left her that night because I thought that if I did, she would hate my dad. They have always been so close, and I didn’t see the point in ruining their relationship too. So, I did what my dad demanded, even though it was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. And I hated him for it.

“I didn’t have a choice,” I tell her now, deciding on a half-truth. “If I did, I never would have stopped kissing you. I wanted you to be mine so badly.”

Daisy looks at me like she’s waiting for more. One tear falls down her cheek, and then another, and without thinking, I reach over and smooth them away with my thumb as her breath hitches in her throat.

“I didn’t want to hurt you, Daisy. And that’s exactly what I ended up doing.”

“You were my best friend. And somehow, I ended up losing you over a kiss.”

“A really fucking amazing kiss.”

She closes her eyes, vehemently shaking her head. On instinct, I run the back of my knuckles from her wrist up to her shoulder. Is she remembering what it felt like to be 16 again, kissing me for the first time, all of the nerves and excitement?

“I thought about that kiss constantly, Daisy.” My throat burns as the confession falls from my lips. “How perfect it felt. How good you tasted. I went to bed every night for months and fucking replayed that kiss in my brain.” I swallow. “I’ve never forgotten it.”

Recklessly, I take a step toward her, my hand sliding from her shoulder to her cheek. My body hums with excitement being this close to her.

“Neither have I, Tuck.”

With her confession, I feel free. Daisy looks over her shoulder at the darkened, empty hallway, as if making sure that no one is watching us. Then her bottom lip drops, and her breath turns shallow and when her eyes meet mine a moment later, I swear I see desire.

My heart races behind my ribcage as I think about kissing her. My childhood best friend. But we’re in a busy bar; anybody could walk by and see us. We live in a small town, and by morning half of Reed Point would be talking. Do I even care anymore?

Fuck.

My feet stay firmly where they are, my body only inches from hers. I think of our pact; making out in public places is almost certainly against the rules that we’ve put in place. And I realize now that sticking to those rules is going to be a lot harder than I realized. There’s one rule in particular that seems almost impossible. Don’t fall in love.

“I want to kiss you, Dais. I want to kiss you so fucking bad.”

“Not here.”

I don’t miss how her skin erupts in goosebumps. She reaches for my hand and the moment she touches me heat crackles up my spine, a million memories of every time I’ve held her hand since we were kids flashing through my mind. The times she reached for me when we climbed rocks at the creek. The times we lay side-by-side at the pool, my fingertips tracing the lines on her palm until our hands eventually intertwined.

And then we’re turning for the exit, her hand in mine and my heart in my throat. I swallow the knot in my throat as we hurry through the hotel lobby and out onto the street. I pull her down a quiet side street to where I parked my truck, and as soon as we get there, I spin her to face me. I reach for her, gripping her face in my hands. There isn’t a moment to think about where we are or what we’re doing, I just kiss her with everything in me.

She stiffens for a split second and then melts into me, her hands gripping the fabric of my shirt, both of us breathing in the kiss like it is everything we’ve ever wanted. Everything we ever needed.

I tell myself it’s just a kiss.

I tell myself it’s just a pact. No strings. No emotions.

But deep down, it feels like so much more.

I breathe her in, deepening the kiss, pulling her to me, feeling like she can never be close enough.

My pulse begins to slow, and my heart rate steadies when her hands slide up my chest to my neck. I slow down the kiss, my tongue finding hers in sensual, calculated strokes. I could kiss Daisy like this for hours.

I’m not sure how long we stay like this, kissing in the dark with the moon and the stars above us, but eventually, it ends, and my forehead is against hers.

“I have to go, Tuck,” she sighs into my mouth. “Briar is going to wonder where I am.”

I nod before pressing my mouth to hers one last time, still holding her tightly to me. I finally release her, taking a step back, and that little bit of space allows me to take my first deep breath since I hauled her outside.

I walk Daisy back to the hotel, my stomach tied in knots wondering how I am ever going to survive this damn pact with my heart in one piece.

I haven’t even fucked her yet and I’m already in over my head.