Noaz (Van Doren #2)

15. Briar

15

brIAR

I feel like I’m walking on air. These last two weeks have flown by. Everything’s just fallen into place since the moment Noaz walked through my door and told me we were having a baby. Not in those exact words. I won’t ever forget the apprehension in their eyes as they told me. The fear that we were going to end right then and there.

But since that moment, it’s been heaven. Simple as that.

A very strange kind of heaven. Our relationship is in a weird flux of organizing our life’s big moments as they come barreling at us while we’re still hovering somewhere around the first days of our relationship.

It’s not just us getting to know each other and learning something new about the other with every conversation. It’s not just the feeling of every single touch, every little kiss feeling like the first time.

More than that, we have been living in a very PG relationship as we navigate all the major life-changing moments stacking on top of each other. I’m not upset about it, and I don’t think Noaz is either. We’ve now jokingly said we’re waiting until marriage .

It might have been said in jest, and yet, that’s what we’re doing.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous. It’s not like we haven’t been hard together. We’ve been in bed together too during travel and have definitely shared intimate moments. But so far, those moments haven’t ended up with our clothes off.

If anything, it ends up with us both panting and needing an orgasm.

I meant what I said. I’m not concerned about Noaz’s magic wand. The thought alone makes me smirk. Magic wand. Fuck’s sake.

But what I think I really meant was that I wasn’t concerned about whether I’d be able to become aroused. Noaz themself arouses me just by existing. By being their authentic self. Everything I learn about them is arousing, even the everyday mundane details.

What has me nervous is touching. I’ve never touched another dick before. Ever.

Then again, I’m also slightly excited about it. Because it’s Noaz and I’m excited for all our firsts and shared experiences together. I’m so damn ready for our relationship to move into intimate moments.

That doesn’t mean the thought doesn’t make my stomach twist with nerves, though.

Today’s topic of conversation as we drive to the Van Doren Estate is finances and careers. We’re in Noaz’s car. I left mine for Levis to drive up. Between the six of us, we have four cars—mine, Haze’s, Honey Bee’s, and Brek’s. Me driving with Noaz made the most sense for the transportation of all the vehicles.

“You don’t need to feel pressured,” Noaz says. They’re behind the wheel today since they know the route. “I don’t care if you work or not. You can stay home with us and raise our family together or… pursue boxing.” They shrug and shake their head. “If you want to work, it should only be if you’re passionate about it since it will take you away from us for so many hours each day.”

I’m not surprised by Noaz’s generosity. Nor that they put far more value on being home with our family than they do on having a career. I understand that. For me, my family was always going to be my priority. Above and beyond anything else.

“I don’t truly know what I want to do,” I admit. “I pursued a degree that interested me, but… the career options don’t feel as fulfilling as learning about the subject. You know?”

Noaz nods. “Yep. I get that. My brother has like three degrees. He’s ridiculous for collecting them like they’re old postcards. But he doesn’t utilize them.”

I tilt my head. “I feel like with as many hands as Jalon has in every single pot imaginable, he’s probably utilizing them more than it appears.”

They chuckle. “Oxley. Not Jalon. Jalon definitely uses his.”

“Ah.”

“Last I knew, I think Oxley’s begun another program, too.”

“Really?”

Noaz hums. “My brother is… different. He’s neurospicy. His biggest comfort is facts. Statistics. Things he can prove and see. A puzzle to put together. Gaining knowledge is the one aspect of his life where he feels at home.”

“That’s cool.”

Noaz nods. “He’s a good guy. Since we’re talking about my brothers, I need to warn you about Kairo. He’s a dick. Like, hardcore. He has been my entire life, and I don’t know why. It’s not like he wasn’t as spoiled as the rest of us or that he was an outcast. He’s just a dick. Whatever the reason behind it is, he hasn’t shared it and honestly, after thirty years, we’ve stopped trying to figure it out.”

“Thanks for the heads up.”

“He will be a dick to you,” Noaz says, their hands tightening around the steering wheel. “I’ll try to circumvent it, but just… be prepared. Fire back if you need to. And don’t be afraid to show him your boxing skills if the need arises.”

I raise my eyebrow.

Noaz glances at me with a half-smile. They’re serious. “Noted,” I say.

“Otherwise, everything will be fine.”

“You have another brother, right?”

Noaz nods. “Yep. Arath. He’s also got some degrees that he pulls out when the need arises. He’s a lot like Jalon, actually. Not the degree thing, but in demeanor. In appearance. You’re going to look at him and say, yep, he’s definitely related to Jalon.”

I chuckle.

“He’s a good guy. I think he’s bringing his… boyfriend?” Noaz shakes their head. “I’m not entirely sure of the situation, to be honest. Something happened and this hockey guy ended up in Arath’s care. Last time I talked to Ara, he said he’s keeping Elgin—as if he were talking about a dog and not a human.” Noaz looks at me with a grin. “I know that makes him sound like a bad guy, but I promise he’s not.”

“Got it. ”

“And Oxley will be there with his new boyfriend. Honestly, I didn’t realize so many of my brothers were gay. But anyway, this guy was shot and Oxley’s been nursing him. Something I find rather amusing since he’s squeamish around blood. Also, Oxley does not like to be called anything but Oxley. He reflexively corrects us every time we say Ox instead. Which we do from time to time in a teasing way because he’s so serious about everything. It’s affectionate and we’ve made that clear to him.”

I nod. “Okay. Let me see if I got this straight. Oxley has a boyfriend?—”

“Huntley,” Noaz interjects.

“Huntley, who has been shot. Oxley also has several degrees and is neurospicy?”

“Yes. Meaning he should have been diagnosed as a child with a neurodivergent disorder, but Dad refused to let it happen. We’re pretty confident he’s autistic, but we just use neurospicy because he’s uncomfortable using medical terms when they haven’t been given to him by an expert in the field.”

“Got it. Then there’s Arath, who also has some degrees, and has a hockey player boyfriend, Elgin. Are we talking pro hockey?”

Noaz nods. “Uh… Philly, probably. That’s where Ara lives and that’s where he found Elgin, so I imagine he plays for Philly. Assuming Philly has a team?” They look at me with their brows furrowed.

“They have a team,” I confirm, chuckling. I’m not super into hockey but I watch stats and such from time to time. “That leaves us with Kairo, who is an ass for the sake of being an ass. Did I miss anything?”

“Oxley only likes being called by his full name. Otherwise, those are the important highlights. ”

“Cool. And they’ll all be there?”

“Probably not today, but yes, they’ll be arriving over the next week for our wedding.”

My stomach flips. Our wedding. We’re getting married!

“Tell me about your family,” Noaz prompts.

“Not a whole lot to tell,” I say. “I have an older brother, Seth. He’s three years older than me. We have a younger sister, Tabitha, who is two years younger than me. My parents are finally divorced after more years than I can remember clearly having lived eight hours apart. My father is now married to a man only two years my elder.”

Noaz looks at me with surprise. “And I thought we were pushing the limits of what’s appropriate.”

I snort. “Nah. Twelve years is nothing compared to my father and Brevan. My father is twice Brevan’s age. They met at the school my father worked at—as a provost—where Brevan attended. While my parents were in the middle of their divorce. Dad and Brevan married within a month of the finalization of his divorce.”

“Wow. I bet that caused some bad blood.”

“My mother has a lot of theories about why my dad always insisted she remain in Anaheim to raise us while he worked way up north. She’s convinced he’s been living a ‘ secret gay life ’ this entire time and used her as his beard.” I shrug.

Noaz looks at me with horror.

I laugh. “I don’t believe that for a second. Mom’s hurt, so she says some things she shouldn’t. I believe Dad’s story. They met through the inauguration of the school’s new ambassador program. Brevan was selected as a student ambassador, and they traveled overseas to work on opening a sister school. Besides, Brevan is one of those guys who I don’t think he’s ever learned how to tell a lie. He’s… to say he’s simple feels insulting.” I stop to think of another word. Basic doesn’t sound any better. “Real, I guess.”

“Every family has some drama, I suppose,” Noaz says.

“Yep. I’m not close to my siblings. We rarely talk. I’m not close enough with either parent to speak of. Dad just because he lived so far away and we only ever spoke to him over the phone. I think we saw him three times a year for as long as I can remember. Mom, well…” I shake my head. “I think she liked the idea of a family more than having one. She wasn’t a bad mother, but she definitely had her own things going on—HOA, PTA, and other organizations that, on the surface, appeared like she was a very caring and attentive mother, but she preferred to parent through committees than in actuality.”

“That sounds rough.”

“Meh. I had my friends and only happy memories from my childhood.” In great part because I had my friends.

It’s at that moment Noaz turns off the highway and we’re driving down what looks like a private road lined with trees. There’s something white in the distance, though I can’t make it out.

“Welcome to the Van Doren Estate,” Noaz says as we drive under an extravagant arch over the road that’s a cross between rich and fancy and old world that reads ‘Van Doren’ in wrought iron. I realize this isn’t a private road but their driveway as the house comes into view.

Calling it a house is like calling the Earth big. This place is massive. The driveway circles a large fountain spewing water and an elaborate sign letting us know this is the Van Doren house. The front of the house shows three stories supported by beautiful pillars. It’s surrounded by spiraling gardens and stonework.

“This is the main house,” Noaz says. “Where Jalon and Voss live. I think you said Levis, Honey Bee, and Brek will stay here.”

“Are you sure there’s enough room for them all?” I ask as I lean forward to take it all in.

Noaz snorts. “Want a tour of the house?”

“Uh… no. Not right now.”

“How about of the grounds? We can take the long way to my house.”

“Yeah, okay. I don’t think I’m prepared for this.”

They laugh. “Probably not. We’re a small village all our own.”

Noaz takes a turn down a road that was hidden by the greenery. It curls to the left. In the distance, on my right, I see fields of green. Which is impressive in Arizona.

“There’s a lake over that way,” Noaz tells me. We pass a break in the road that Noaz goes by. “Down that way is the hotel.”

I shake my head. Honestly. I’m surprised they don’t have a damn market here. Then again, maybe they do.

Further on, the road splits three ways. “Okay, to the left are the cottages. There are six. They’re used for guests. Straight ahead leads to the garages.” They turn the car toward the right. In the distance are apple orchards that run parallel to the road. The first house we pass, Noaz tells me belongs to Loren. Right across from Loren’s house is another road Noaz says cuts back alongside the hotel and continues around the far side of the lake.

The next house we pass belongs to Myro, and then the road curves right. Huge gardens begin to line the world to my right. On the left are a series of large sheds and yes, what looks like a damn market.

Further along is the building that Noaz says is where they conduct business. It’s Jalon’s headquarters for everything Van Doren Technologies does. Behind the business building are pastures with grazing animals, and I spy a massive livestock guardian dog.

Then the lake is abruptly in front of us. We follow the road around the water and directly into a forest, where the road splits once again. Noaz stops in the middle of the road.

“Okay, that way leads to the cabins. There are… eight, I think. Again, for guests. That way leads back toward the main house and out of the trees, connecting with another road that leads more directly into the trees. If we go straight, the road will split again. To the left is Kairo’s house, straight ahead you’d go deeper in the trees and come upon barns and such. Storage and workshops and whatever. The road to the right will take you to the triplets’ houses. Oxley’s is across the river, and then just beyond Oxley’s is Arath’s.”

“You all live here?”

“Eh. Kind of. We come and go. For me, this is what I consider my primary home, though in reality, home is where Jalon and his boys are.”

I grin, and Noaz rolls their eyes. It doesn’t hide their smile.

“Work takes us to different places. I tend to spend most of my time in New York City, where I work. Kairo is in Chicago, Arath in Philly, Oxley in Anaheim.” They wave their hand and then start driving again.

This time, when Noaz turns off the road, it’s onto what is unmistakably a driveway leading to a very nice house. I know we’re pulling up in front of Noaz’s house. I’m not sure what about it says so other than the fact they turn the engine off, but I can feel that this is Noaz’s house.

“And here we are,” Noaz confirms. “Home.”

I lean across the console and grip the back of their neck, bringing them close to me. Our heads press together as we look out the windshield.

This is where we’re going to raise our family. Where we’ll grow old together. I’m so fucking excited.

“Home,” I agree.