Only With You (Knights #2)

10

JULIANNA

I regret not leaving while I had a chance.

All my friends are downstairs dancing, while I’m in the VIP section holding on to my third drink of the night. I’m not sure what it is, but Polly gave it to me.

I’ve been taking small sips, because the shots I had earlier—plus the two drinks before this one—are really taking effect. My body feels warm and light, and my head spins just a bit, but nothing I can’t control.

I’d join them, but I’m so uncoordinated, it’s embarrassing. I can’t dance to save my life. The girls begged me to join them because Daisy, Cara, and their roommate Darius are down there too, but I’d only end up making a fool of myself.

So I stayed here, drinking while I not only watch them, but watch a girl flirt with Landon.

We didn’t talk about what happened outside. Though nothing really did, not physically at least, because mentally my mind is screaming that something did happen.

I can still feel the scrape of his beard against my ear and remember the way his eyes burned into me.

But I’m doing my best to ignore the feeling, because just a few feet away from me, he’s talking to a girl. Leah, I heard him call her.

They’re not just talking, though. She’s flirting with him and he’s definitely enjoying it. He may not be smiling or laughing, but he seems comfortable, relaxed even. All of his attention is on her, intently listening to whatever she’s saying.

Leah seems to fit the description of what Landon’s type would be. He didn’t tell me, but I can only assume she’s it.

She’s extremely gorgeous, has a full sleeve of tattoos on one arm, and I see another peeking from beneath the hem of her dress. It’s checkered with black and white, and it’s also short and tight. Her makeup is dark but shimmery, and don’t get me started on her perfect winged eyeliner. It looks amazing. Her hair is inky-black, except the front two strands which are silver. She also has a septum ring, and her fingers are decorated in rings.

I startle and almost spill my drink when someone drops onto the seat next to me.

“Hey!” Gabby beams, her smile droopy and eyes glassy.

I giggle when she sways back and forth. “Hey.”

“You really should come dance with us. I promise you’ll have lots and lots of fun.” She clasps her hands together and juts her bottom lip out.

I don’t think she’s drunk, but it looks like she will be soon.

“I promise you don’t want me down there. Everyone’s feet will be in danger.” I glance at my heeled feet and back at her.

“Who cares! Do you know how many times I’ve been elbowed and stepped on?” She counts using her fingers, but I think she loses track and waves her hand dismissively. “I promise it doesn’t matter who you step on. No one will remember by tomorrow.”

Her wide smile almost convinces me, but it’s not enough to get me to concede.

“I’m better here.” I drink the remaining liquid and shudder as the alcohol settles in my stomach. I laugh, blinking a few times as my vision shifts sideways. “Whoa.”

“Good, right? I’m not sure what it is either, but Polly swears on it,” she supplies before going to drink whatever’s in her cup, and groans. “I hadn’t realized I finished my drink. You want me to get you another?”

My gaze wanders to Landon and Leah. She leans closer and whispers something in his ear.

Whatever she said has them both standing up and heading for the stairs.

“No, I’ll go with you.”

I hadn’t gone downstairs because I knew Cole was here. He was actually the main reason why I decided against going downstairs. But a while ago I watched him leave with his friends and never saw him come back in.

Now that I know he’s not here, I don’t have to worry about running into him.

She jumps to her feet, almost stumbles back, but she manages to keep her balance. “Yay, okay!”

I laugh at her enthusiasm and stand, hooking my arms around hers. “I’m sorry I’m not fun, but thanks for bringing me.”

She peers up at me. “Are you kidding? You are fun. I understand why you don’t want to dance. I know it’s not for everyone, and that’s okay. As long as you’re here with us, that’s all that matters. Having you here is enough for us.”

I smile, but look away before I make things awkward. It may not mean anything to her, but hearing her say that means more than she’ll ever know.

We carry on through the crowd, being elbowed and stepped on, but we laugh it off and wave at our friends before we make it to the bar.

After we order, we stand to the side because all of the barstools are taken.

Gabby glances from side to side and then stares at me like she’s contemplating something.

“What?” I lift a brow, staring at her amused.

“It’s nothing.”

“Don’t feel obligated to tell me, but you can trust me. I swear nothing will ever leave these lips.” I pretend to zip them up and toss the imaginary key to the side.

Her eyes nervously bounce everywhere before they’re on me again. “Sometimes…I wonder…”

I stifle a chuckle. “You wonder what?”

“Whatit’dbeliketohavesex.” She says it all quickly and quietly, and I don’t catch any of it.

Leaning closer, I push my purse up my shoulder, but I falter for a second. Remembering how I hadn’t realized it had slipped from my grasp and the way Landon had caught it.

“I’m sorry, what? I didn’t hear you. The music is a little too loud.”

She stands on her tiptoes, and in my ear, says, “Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like to have sex.”

As I look back at her, the bright technicolor flashes on her face. Before the light shifts, I see her freckled cheeks burn red. She doesn’t hold my gaze as if she’s embarrassed to have admitted that.

“Hey, don’t worry. I haven’t had sex in a while. I miss it, too.”

She sheepishly smiles and twirls a lock of her thick, black wavy hair around her finger. “No, I’ve—I’ve never had sex. I’m still a virgin.”

I think I’m more buzzed than I realized. I didn’t fully register her words, but now that I think about them, it makes sense.

“I know it sounds lame, but I?—”

She must have mistaken my silence for something else, but I quickly cut her off.

“Oh, no, I’m sorry. I think I’m a little drunker than I thought I was, but no, it’s not lame.” I smile at her, squeezing her wrist for reassurance, and let it go when the bartender sets our drinks in front of us. “It’s okay that you haven’t had sex. You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

Her eyes glimmer again and the nervous edge surrounding them disappears. “I’ve been thinking a lot about it recently, and I’ve just—I don’t know.” She takes a sip of her drink. “I think I’m ready.”

Taking a sip of my own, I consider what I want to say to her. “Don’t feel pressured to do something just because everyone is, but if you’re ready, find someone you trust. Someone who understands consent …”

My mind drifts to Landon and our conversation in the alleyway, and what he did after I gave him my consent.

I can still feel his rough hand around my throat, lightly squeezing, his calluses softly scratching my skin.

I clear my throat and take a long drink, the cold liquid cooling my blistering body.

“Consent is really important. They need to understand what’s okay with you and what isn’t.”

She nods, listening avidly. “Right, of course, consent is everything.”

“Do you have someone in mind?” The smile on my face grows until my cheeks ache.

“Ah…no.” Her lips thin in a straight line. “That’s the thing. I don’t know who it would be.”

“That’s okay. You have all the time in the world. We’ll find someone for you.” We skim the crowd, considering all the prospects. There are so many guys, but from my own personal experience, I don’t want Gabby to end up with someone like Cole.

My hands become wet with sweat and my body tenses, but before I can allow myself to go there, I chug the rest of my drink.

“Whoa, if I did that, I’d pass out on the spot. I’m unfortunately an extreme lightweight, so I gotta take it easy.”

“Trust me, I’m going to regret this in the morning, but fuck it.” I shrug, setting my cup on the bar top just as the bartender stands in front of me. “Another one,” I tell her.

Gabby shakes her head, giggling at me. “I’m so happy you came! Oh my gosh, I’m going to go get the girls and Darius, and we’re going to have shots! I’ll be back!”

I grin, watching her run off to find the girls. Once she disappears into the crowd, I turn and my smile deepens when I spot an empty stool. I take it just as the bartender sets my drink down, but before I can take a drink, I feel someone hovering next to me.

“Why don’t eggs tell jokes?”

For a moment, I think I heard wrong and assume it wasn’t meant for me, but I hear the question again. Looking to my right, I’m met with a bright pair of green eyes.

“Why don’t eggs tell jokes?” he repeats again, sheepishly smiling.

“I don’t know, why?”

“They crack up too easily.”

The joke is extremely corny, but it’s hard not to laugh. “That was a really bad joke. Does it work often?”

A tinge of red coats his cheek. He brings his hand to the nape of his neck and awkwardly rubs it. “Never, but I figured it’d be a good way to break the ice.”

Grabbing my drink and covering it with my palm, I turn to look for the girls. When I spot them, they’re giving me the thumbs-up, beaming like proud mothers. I shake my head, but I get this look from Polly that I understand loud and clear.

“He’s cute, stay,” I’m sure is what she’s communicating to me.

“I’m Julianna.” I extend my hand toward him, deciding to go with the flow.

He takes my hand in his, softly shaking it. “River. I know it’s an odd name, but my parents are big hippies and they thought I was going to be a girl. So, River stuck.”

I chuckle, crossing my leg over the other. “It’s not odd at all. I like it. It’s better than my name. It sounds so bland. At least yours has character.”

River lets go of my hand and leans against the bar top. “Julianna,” he says like he’s trying to get a feel for it. “I don’t think it’s bland at all. Do you shorten it or do you prefer just Julianna?” He stares at me with genuine curiosity.

My mind instantly goes to Landon and the stupid nickname he calls me. Hollywood and now Angel. I don’t understand his fascination with the first one, and I’ve no idea where the second came from.

“My friends call me Juls.”

“Am I a friend?” A small, timid smile stretches across his face.

I playfully shrug. “I don’t know. I don’t know you.”

“ Yet ,” he adds, his smile becoming more confident. “That is…if you want, but no pressure. I’m a senior at NCU. You can search me up. My last name is Hale.” He winces, embarrassment covering his face. “You know what, forget it. I’m going to walk away now.”

I laugh, stopping him as he pivots. “No, no, stay. It’s okay. I’m also a senior at NCU, and my last name is Sparks.”

“Julianna Sparks. I like that. It’s really fitting.”

“Is it because of my sparkling personality?” I mock, full of sarcasm, and take a drink.

Now he chuckles. “Do you get that a lot?”

“You have no idea.” I wrinkle my nose, remembering how many guys have used my last name as some sort of pick-up line. “The egg joke is now my favorite and I don’t think anything will ever compare to it.”

“That’s nothing.” He rolls his shoulders back and cracks his fingers. “Are you ready?”

I eagerly nod.

“Somebody better call God, because he’s missing an angel.”

My body weirdly tingles as the new nickname Landon gave me comes to mind.

Of course he would when I’m having a good time. Somehow he always seems to make his disturbing self known even when he’s not around.

“How was that? Amazing, huh?” River wiggles his brows, his smile infectious and sweet, making it hard not to mirror it.

I giggle. “Please don’t ever use that on any girl.”

“But you’re not just any girl,” he says.

River is attractive, with ginger wild waves and soft, bright green eyes. Freckles are sprinkled across the bridge of his nose and cheeks. He’s probably an inch or two taller than me, has a nice build, and a ten out of ten personality.

So something must be really wrong with me because he’s everything I could ask for in a guy, yet I’m not feeling it.

I don’t know him, that’s why. It’s what I tell myself.

We spend the next few minutes talking about random things. River’s gotten a little bolder and inches closer to me. His hand rests on the back of my stool. His fingers caress my shoulder.

I don’t mind it. I lean in, appreciating how soft his fingers feel. Even though it feels good, I wish they were rougher. I also wish all of the alcohol I’ve consumed tonight would be enough to numb my thoughts and how I feel. Instead, I feel everything.

The liquid runs through my veins, heating my body, making my cheeks ache from how hard I’m laughing and smiling. The intoxication is euphoric. My head feels light, and at times, everything spins, but not in a way that is going to make me sick. I feel distant but so close, like everything around me is at my grasp, but not really.

“So, are you here by yourself or with friends?”

“With friends. They’re in the VIP section.”

He looks up in that direction while I take a sip of my drink.

“You’re friends with the guys on the basketball team?” he asks amazed.

I blink a few times because I think my vision is fucked up, but when it semi-clears, I see how his eyes sparkle. So I wasn’t seeing things. Oh, God, not him too.

“No, not them, the girls who are with them.”

“That’s still pretty cool. Wow.” His face burns a bright scarlet. “Sorry, I’m just a big fan of the basketball team and…”

Before I can get a word in, he rambles on about the team. I think he mentions something about having class with TJ and Jagger, and meeting the coach. I’m not entirely sure because I zone out through most of it.

Resting my elbow on the bar top, I lay my chin on my palm, absentmindedly nodding.

“—Landon.”

My chin almost slips as I hear his name.

“What?”

“Landon’s the only one I haven’t talked to on the team. He’s just so…” He takes a pull of his beer, musing over what he wants to say. A meek smile touches his lips. “Intimidating.”

I snort and sway in my seat, almost spilling my drink on me. “Please don’t let his grim personality make you believe he’s intimidating. He’s everything but that.” I grimace. “You’re seriously not missing out. He’s kind of an asshole. If I were you, I wouldn’t go anywhere near him. It would be a disservice if I didn’t warn you about him.”

His brows shoot up, eyes wide, staring above my head in incredulity or maybe in fear?

“Hey.” I squeeze his arm to get his attention back on me, but he takes a step back. “What’s wrong?”

“A disservice, huh?” My back stiffens at the familiar British accent.

I don’t dare turn around, because I want to believe I imagined him. Only that’s wishful thinking because he is, in fact, behind me.

“Holy shit, Landon! Hey, it’s so good to meet you. I’m a big fan,” River says, his tone calm and composed, but I can tell he’s trying to tame his excitement down. A buzzing energy radiates off him, and I’m pretty certain I just saw him wipe his palms on his jeans. “My name’s?—”

“Thanks for keeping her company, but I’ll take it from here,” he cuts him off, standing in front of River and me.

I sputter out a laugh. There’s no way I heard that correctly.

“We’re leaving,” he flatly says.

River looks just as confused as I feel. His gaze flits between Landon and me, then something lights in his eyes like he’s connected the dots. “Oh, shit, are you guys…”

“God, no!”

“No.”

A crease settles between his brows, then they flatten back and he smiles. “I should probably get back to my friends anyway.”

I want to tell him not to go. I’m sure I look desperate with the way I’m looking at him. But it doesn’t matter, because he mistakes my desperation as a cue for him to leave.

“It was great to meet you, Landon and Julianna. I’ll see you around.” He happily says, despite Landon hardly acknowledging him as he walks away.

“No, don’t go,” I plead, but he’s already gone and the music drowns out my words. I spin to look at the giant in front of me, but immediately regret it as everything spins.

“This is why we’re leaving. You’re drunk.”

I glare, holding the bar top to keep my balance. “You just ruin…everything. You asshole, leave…”

I think he rolls his eyes, but I’m not sure. He motions for the bartender and she sits a clear cup in front of me and walks off to attend to someone else.

“Drink this.” He encourages, but I push it away and go to pick up my drink, but it’s gone.

“Hey! I wasn’t—I wasn’t done with that. You’re going to pay for that!”

“Stop being a fucking brat and drink the water, Julianna,” he irritably says, sliding the cup back in front of me.

I can’t begin to explain why my ears like how my name sounds leaving his lips.

“Make me. I bet you’d love that, huh?”

He inches closer, invading my space. “What I’d love is if you drank the damn water.”

I lean in, staring up at him. “And what I’d love is if you disappeared.”

I try to get the bartender’s attention, because there’s no way I’m going to stop drinking just because he said so. I call for her again, but still, she doesn’t approach me. It almost feels like she’s intentionally ignoring me.

I frown. “Did you tell her not to?—”

“You’re drunk. You’ve had enough.” He pins me with a look as if he’s daring me to argue with him.

“I’ll decide when I’ve had enough.” I try again to get the other bartender’s attention, but she doesn’t look my way. I blow out a harsh breath, hiking my purse up my shoulder. “I hope you’re happy.”

“Ecstatic. Now, let’s go.”

I slap his hand away as he goes to grab my arm. “Whoa, wait a minute! I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“I’m taking you home,” he simply says as if that should be enough to appease me.

“You mean you’re going home.”

He frustratedly runs his fingers through his hair. El’s right, he does have beautiful hair.

“—they know I’m taking you home.”

I snap out of it and pick up the cup, feeling extremely parched. “Who knows?”

“Everyone’s gone.”

My heart lurches painfully and I spin to look at the VIP section that’s taken up by people who I didn’t come with. They left me?

“I told them I’d take you home. You don’t want to be here, and you told Gabby you weren’t sure you wanted to go to the party,” he explains.

That’s all he has to say for it to somehow make sense. I had no desire to go, but was only going for the girls.

“Now, let’s go, or I’m leaving you.”