Own Me (Savage Bosses)

9. Ayana

CHAPTER 9

Ayana

O h my God, I can’t believe I had to call in late again.

My steps falter the closer I get to my office. I can’t believe I’ve arrived late twice since I started my new position at NexGen West Software a month ago.

“Well, I can’t help that I had a flat and had to wait for the roadside assistance provider to show up an hour later,” I tell myself. “I’m sure Sterling will understand that misfortunes in life happen.”

That’s why I took the extra ten minutes to stop at Starbucks to grab Sterling a black coffee and a cream cheese Danish to calm the waters. Plus, I have been coming in early, learning the computer system inside out and doing my job perfectly. And I’ve been working hard in the time I’ve been here to make myself indispensable. My flawless resume, stellar interpersonal talents, and soft skills speak for themselves.

My stomach clenches tightly at the thought of my boss having more cause to fire me.

“Good morning,” I give a quick wave to Vanessa.

“Good morning, Ayana.” The secretary replies with a bright smile.

“You won’t believe this, but I had a flat tire, and I had to wait?—”

Suddenly, Vanessa’s smile falters, and I can feel the fine hair against my nape standing on end.

“Do you realize what time of day this is?”

I turn slowly to face my boss, who is standing behind me. His voice is laced with dry sarcasm, and his stare rakes over my body from head to toe. The last thing I need this morning is him assaulting me with his lethal glare.

I swallow hard and force a smile to my lips. “Good morning, Sterling. Here, I brought you coffee, just the way you like it, and a Danish,” I add, extending the peace offering.

He just stands there staring at me, observing my extended arms. A flush of embarrassment travels over me. I drop my arms to my sides and attempt to walk past him to get to my office.

He walks beside me to say, “Did you decide to sleep in again, Sleeping Beauty, while the rest of us work our asses off?”

I halt my steps, which makes him pause his stride. My spine stiffens, and I turn to meet his glacial stare. Even in four-inch heels, I still have to arch my head to gaze up at him. The fact that he called me Beauty , albeit sarcastically, is not lost on me. I despise how much I love that he thinks I’m beautiful.

“I’m so sorry I’m late, but I did call in. I was halfway to work when my tire went flat. I had to wait for a roadside service to bring me a new tire and change it. I promise you I won’t be late again,” I say, taking a deep breath to calm my nerves. “I better get to work so I can catch up on my tasks.”

This time, I manage to slip past him and make my way to my office. I put the cup of coffee and the bag with the Danish on my desk and my handbag in my bottom desk drawer before I power up my computer.

“I’m not finished with you.” He raises his voice in the hall.

I exhale again. I should have known it wouldn’t be that easy to start my day without confrontation.

I glance up with my best friendly smile to see Sterling standing in the doorway, watching me.

“Did you come for your coffee and Danish?” I ask in a sugary sweet tone.

“Did you forget we had an early morning staff meeting? I had to deal with your tasks in your absence. If this job is too much for you, just turn in your resignation now. I will hire someone who doesn’t mind being on time and getting shit done.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. A resignation is exactly what he wants, for me to give up and quit. I press my lips together so the words go fuck yourself don’t slip out of my mouth.

He crosses his thick, muscled arms across his broad chest and stares as if waiting for me to blow up.

I allow myself to take in his handsome features. I notice how perfect his fit frame is encased in a dark, custom-made suit. The coat stretches across his shoulders, and the slacks brace against his toned thighs.

Even as angry as I am, the image of his hot, naked body hovering over me, fucking my brains out, is never too far from my memory.

“Ayana, I expect an answer instead of you sitting there glaring at me.”

I want to say , Prick . Before I let the perfect word to describe him fly from my lips, I pull back my shoulders and meet his gaze. “I value this job, Sterling. Although I can’t help that I had a flat tire, I profusely apologize for being late. I’m sorry that I missed the meeting, and I’m sorry that I put you in a position to take up my slack. If you need to dock my pay, I will understand. Again, I am sorry.”

“All the half-assed apologies in the world won’t cut it,” he scoffs.

I sit straighter in my seat, clench my teeth and flex the fingers of my hand that itched to slap his smug face. He might be trying to ratchet up the cruelty to get me to quit, but there is such a thing as too much. His unforgiving tone strikes my last nerve, but I remain calm on the outside. I will not give him the satisfaction of seeing me sweat.

“And since you were late—yet again—I expect the contract from the Perryton Firm to be on my desk before you leave, even if it takes you all night. I expect coffee on my desk in the morning, made by you, not from—” he scowls in the direction of the Starbucks cup. “If you really value and want this job the way you say you do, then prove it.”

I gasp. No words leave my mouth. I watch him turn and walk away. Any passion for him inside me competes with my growing contempt for him. I snatch the coffee and bag with the Danish and drop them over the side of my glass desk. They land in the metal wastebasket with a thud. I wish it was him I could shove in the trash.

O ne o’clock is usually when I break for lunch, but I stay at my desk reading through the Perryton file. I promised myself that I would finish it and get caught up with my work by the end of the business day.

It’s just too bad that I can hear the grumbling in my belly. Maybe I should pop down to the cafeteria and grab a chicken sandwich and something to drink. I instantly change my mind as I glance at the piles of file folders and binders cluttering my desk. I rub the back of my neck and return to my work. No rest for the weary.

An hour later, I glance up at Vanessa standing in front of my desk.

“Hey, I missed you in the cafeteria at lunch. I figured you didn’t have time to grab lunch, so I brought you a sandwich and cola,” she says.

“Oh my God! You are a life saver.” I grab her offerings and thank her.

“It’s just ham and cheese on rye.” She gives me a sweet smile. “How’s your day going?” She sits on the edge of my desk.

“It’s been hellish, but I’m making the best of it.”

“I can’t imagine. Sterling is usually fair and understands his employee’s circumstances. He goes out of his way to help whenever one of us is in need. This is so out of character—the way he is with you,” she says in a confiding tone.

I give her a suspicious glance. “I guess he ran out of compassion when it came to me. I was late, though. Twice, as a matter of fact. I must not let that happen again.”

“You are a positive woman, my dear. I admire you for that.” She smiles at me as I finish up the sandwich. “You were really hungry, huh?”

I laugh. “Very, and that hit the right spot.”

Vanessa raises to her feet. “Glad I could help. I better get back to work.”

“Thanks again,” I tell her before she walks off.

Later, I finish my cola and have the sudden urge to pee. I run to the nearest bathroom to handle my business. When I stand from the toilet, I guess I move too fast because I become so dizzy that I fall back down. Then, my stomach turns. I stand and whirl around just in time to puke into the toilet.

Damn it. The stress is getting to me. This is the same way I used to feel before exams.

I clean myself up and hustle back to work. When I get back to my desk, Sterling is standing in front of it with a frown on his face.

“Slacking off again, eh?” he says as I take a seat behind my desk.

I glance up once seated and take my time to reply when all I really want to do is cuss his ass out. “Actually, I had to use the restroom, I?—”

“Ayana, since you have so much time on your hands to dawdle, I need you to go to the finance department and retrieve some files.” Sterling crosses those muscled arms of his over his broad chest. It must be a signature move he uses to intimidate people. It’s working a little. “Do you think you can find time out of your leisurely schedule for that?”

Tyrant!

Sterling West is a beautiful, blue-eyed tyrant that I want to slap. Instead, I paste on a smile and say, “Sure, I can do that for you. Is there anything else, sir?”

The arrogant ass turns and walks away without a word.

My gaze follows him. Who the fuck does he think he is? And who the fuck dawdles? I stand up and walk across the hall to the elevator. When the doors slide open, I punch the number button hard, chipping a nail. “Damn it.” I pass my thumb along the jagged edge. Could this day get any worse? I make my way down to the finance department. I retrieve his files and head back up to my floor.

I stroll over to his closed office door and knock. There is no invitation to enter, so I knock again and wait.

Sheesh, I was only gone fifteen minutes or so. Maybe he’s in his restroom. I turn the knob, walk in, and halt in my steps.

My eyes lock on a woman and then my boss. He glances up, but his gaze barely lingers on me before returning to the sleek-haired woman at his side. I notice his hand on her shoulder before moving downward to pause at the small of her back. I feel a hint of resentment at the way he dismisses me, and the feeling of their closeness permeates the atmosphere and sets my emotions on edge.

I wonder who she is? The two look much too comfortable for her to be a new hire.

I clear my throat, and the woman’s head swivels in my direction. She is beautiful with slanted cat-like eyes, and her lips are full, painted a dark red, the same color as the body-hugging red dress she is wearing. The color looks alluring against her pale skin.

I wonder if I have walked into something more than a professional meeting. A feeling of unhappiness courses through me at the thought. They really did make a beautiful pair.

Sterling faces me again, then raises a palm toward the woman. I notice a cocky smirk against his lips before he speaks. “Ayana, this is Lux Denning, my new assistant. She’ll be helping you with the tasks at hand.”

“Ahh,” I manage.

“Just leave the files on the desk. I’m taking Lux to a late lunch at Chez Phillipe.”

A feeling of loss and confusion tears through me. I have never been to Chez Phillipe, one of the most expensive restaurants in Memphis, but I had heard rave reviews. Why is he taking a new hire to Chez Phillipe? More importantly, why did he hire a new assistant when he has me? Anger and resentment make their way through my frame. I storm over to the desk and slam the files down.

“Nice to meet you, Lux,” I force a professional smile to my lips.

“It’s lovely to meet you, Ayana. Maybe we can talk more later.” Lux’s smile grows more prominent, and I feel almost terrible for the mixed emotions warring inside me. Lux’s catlike eyes meet mine. Her smile is friendly, and I feel bad for wanting to dislike her without knowing anything about her.

“I would like that and maybe we can grab lunch sometime soon.”

“Aww, thanks, I will like that very much,” Lux replies.

“Ahem,” Sterling makes a noise clearing his throat. My eyes meet his and he gazes from Lux to me before saying, “that will be all, Ayana. Have a good evening if I don’t see you when we return. I expect this lunch to run—long.”

I smile inwardly when I notice the cocky smirk he previously portrayed slides from his lips as he takes Lux by the elbow and starts to steer her toward the door.

I watch as they stroll past me.

I think I’m going to be sick again.

I slap a hand across my mouth and rush to Sterling’s ensuite bathroom just in time.

L ater that evening, Shayla and I meet for dinner at Kountry Cookin’ Soul Food Restaurant, not too far from her apartment.

“I hate my boss. He makes me so furious.” I stab at the mashed potatoes on my plate.

“Damn, Yana.” She puts down a fork with a big, steaming piece of yam on the end. “You need a drink and an outlet.”

“I do really need to vent. I don’t know what to do otherwise if I don’t let it all out.”

“You have to figure something out before you end up eating a pound of ice cream every night.”

“I know. I don’t want to do that.” I ponder my options. “I could exercise, but let’s get real. When was the last time I used my gym membership?”

Shayla’s eyes widen. “You’re not the only one. I need to get back in the gym too, girl.”

“I could meditate, but I know I lack patience for sitting still.”

“You remember Tara, my cousin, right?”

“Yeah, I remember her, but what does she have to do with what I’m talking about?”

Shayla pushes my glass of tea closer to me. “Here, honey, take a drink of your tea and chill.”

I reach for the glass and take a refreshing sip, curious about what my friend has to say.

“Anyway, Tara told me how her boss has been treating her. She says he favors the male employees over most of the women in the company, including her. And these women have more experience and a higher degree in their field than the men.”

I nod and frown. “That’s terrible and chauvinistic behavior.

“I agree. You and Tara are in similar situations. You both hate your bosses, even though it may be for different reasons. You should connect with her and share bad boss stories,” Shayla laughs, but something clicks for me.

“We really should connect because I have some stories to share, and it would be good to talk to someone who knows what I’m going through.”

“Tara is always saying she’s damned if she does the right thing, and she’s damned if she doesn’t. She has been on her job for so long, and then she gets a new boss out of the blue, and now she can’t do anything right.” Shayla picks up her fork and puts the yam in her mouth. “Tara has this site she goes on to vent. I think it will help you too.

I smile. “Really? What’s the name of the chat room?”

“It’s called Boss Be Damned . And it’s a place where women who are having problems with their bosses can come and vent. It’s called BBD for short.” Shayla giggles and winks.

“Hm, I already love the name. I like the idea of venting about my boss assholes like I’m feeling better already. We can empower each other to survive each day.”

“I’m glad I could help my friend.”

“I wish I would have known about this site sooner because I have some things to get off my chest about Mister Bossy Pants.”

Shayla laughs even harder. “I think this site will be a hit with people working for asshole bosses.”

“Yes, because there are more boss-holes out there than we can imagine,” I reply and scoop a helping of mashed potatoes, shoving them in my mouth. Their taste was nearly as gratifying as my self-satisfaction. I couldn’t be more excited to start venting on the BBD chatroom site.