Penalty for Boarding (Curves on Ice #3)

15. Calvin

CALVIN

“ W hat do you mean, I have to choose?” My voice is controlled fury, but inside I'm reeling. The article. The pictures. The accusations and disappointment from the man who's been like a father to me. It’s like my world is crumbling around me. “Olivia and I haven't done anything wrong!”

Even as the words leave my mouth, a wave of nausea rises in my throat, my stomach churning with a sickening mix of anger, shame, and guilt. I can still feel the heat of Olivia's skin against mine, hear the breathless catch in her voice as I moved inside her, remember the overwhelming feeling of rightness that had washed over me in that intimate cocoon of my truck.

But now, seeing our private moments splashed across the pages of some gossip rag, it all feels tainted. Dirty. The grainy images blur before my eyes, and suddenly all I can see is the reckless selfishness of my own actions. I was the one who pushed for more, who couldn't keep my hands to myself even in semi-public. And now Olivia's reputation, her career, is on the line because of my lack of control.

Self-recrimination sits heavy in my gut, even as white-hot rage courses through my veins at the thought of anyone daring to use our love against us. My fingers press into my thighs, every muscle rigid with the barely restrained urge to punch a hole through the wall. Or better yet, the photographing weasel's face.

Coach's voice cuts through the red haze of my fury, his tone low and grave. “Nobody's saying you did anything wrong, son. But you have to understand how this looks. The media is having a field day. Our sponsors are concerned. There's a lot of pressure coming down from the top to handle this, to make a clear statement that the Nighthawks don't condone fraternizing with the enemy.”

“The enemy?” I scoff. “Listen to yourself! This isn't some battleground. It's fucking hockey. And Olivia... She's not some spy. She's the woman I love.”

My words hang in the air, the truth of them resonating deep in my bones. I love her. She's the endgame, not my career.

Coach clears his throat, looking to his daughter for help as if I just spoke in some foreign language.

“No one's questioning your feelings, Calvin,” Sara says, her voice soft in her attempt to placate me. “But you have to understand the position this puts the team in. There are serious concerns about conflicts of interest, about confidentiality. There are consequences to consider. For you, for Olivia, for the integrity of the game.”

Consequences . The word tastes bitter on my tongue. All my life, I've played by the rules, given everything to this sport. It robbed me of my first marriage. And now, when I've finally found something real, something that makes me feel alive off the ice again, I'm being punished for it?

No. Fuck that.

“You know what? I'm done.”

“Done?” Coach repeats, his bushy eyebrows shooting up. “Calvin, let's not be hasty...”

But I'm already standing, resolve solidified. “I've given everything to this team, to the Nighthawks. If that's not enough, if I'm not allowed to have a life, to love who I want... Then I don't want to play the game anymore.”

Stunned silence follows my declaration. Coach opens his mouth, but no words come.

“Calvin…” Sara starts, but I hold up my hand to stop her.

“I'm sorry,” I say, and I mean it. “But I have to do what's right for me. Hockey's been my life, but Olivia... She's my future. I choose her.”

“But your career,” Coach quickly interjects.

“With all due respect, sir. Fuck my career. We all know I don’t have a lot of seasons left in me. But even if I had the chance of another decade in this game, I’d still choose her. She means everything to me.”

“Dad,” Sara gasps, looking straight at her father, who just stares at me wordlessly, his mouth flapping. I take it as my cue to turn and walk out, leaving behind a legacy, a team and the chance at making the playoffs one last time... But at least I’m taking my heart with me.