Poinsettia Lane

Chapter Twenty-Three

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

THEY GET BACK later than she expects, and as much as she wants to finish what they started in the desert, Everly can’t stop the massive yawn that threatens to unhinge her jaw right as she takes her helmet off. Asim catches it, of course, and quirks a tender smile.

“I think maybe we should call it a night here," he says.

Everly frowns, and he glides his hand down her hair to her waist, tugging her into him.

“Remember what I said?” He breathes the words into her ear, and the skin on her neck breaks out in goose-bumps. “I want to take my time with you. I promise to make it worth the wait.”

Asim cups her face in his hands as he pulls back, a moment and an eternity passing as they get lost in each other’s eyes. When Everly blinks, slow and lazy, he seems to pull out of whatever haze they’ve fallen into. Asim leans forward and softly kisses her forehead, then pulls her into the coziest hug she has ever received, tucking her head under his chin and holding her close.

“I had an amazing night, Ever.” His voice rumbles under her ear.

She smiles and closes her eyes, nuzzling her face into his chest and trying not to be too obvious as she inhales his earthy scent.

“Thank you for coercing me into a second date," he says.

“Hey!” she protests, her eyes popping open as she smacks the middle of his back lightly.

He chuckles and places a quick kiss on her nose .

“I’m kidding. If you hadn’t asked, I would have. I’m glad you feel safe enough to tell me what you want though, that feels really good, having your trust in that way," Asim reassures her.

He’s giving more weight to the vowels again, drawing them out so they dance like a caress across her skin as he speaks.

Everly feels like a helium balloon. So full of light and happiness that she might pop or float away at any moment as they say their goodnights.

She drifts up the stairs to the shower after watching Asim drive away, her heart fluttering in her chest.

~~~

A looming stack of paperwork waits for her at the Sioria the next day and Everly meets it with a grimace, annoyed that most of her job is simply signing her name next to yellow arrow sticky tabs. She checks in with her assistant as well as the managers who report directly to her, but everyone appears happy and everything seems to be running smoothly, so she’s not needed for more than a few hours that day. Normally she would find more to do, putter around and make herself useful.

Leaning back, she spins her chair around to face the gorgeous view out over the river. Everly studies the hilly landscape with massive boulders along the water and pockets of greenery and trees here and there, but largely covered in cacti and smaller brush. It’s at the tail end of the rainy season, which means everything will be blooming soon if it’s not already. It’s one of her favorite times of the year, when the desert turns green and colorful and everything is so alive.

As she enjoys the desert view, swinging her chair back and forth with her feet, Everly’s mind wanders to the night before. She marvels at how comfortable the date was, even though every single thing was a new experience. From what she chose to wear, to riding a motorcycle and being lost in the desert, to the snack picnic and frenzied making out.

It felt like she was in high school again—if she hadn’t been a perfect goody-two-shoes, straight-A student who never stepped a toe out of line and wasn’t way too shy to let herself feel so openly like that. The most she ever did in high school was some very PG-13 kissing after prom.

Her parents were always emphasizing how important it is to maintain the proper image, that you never know who might be watching, and it became so ingrained into her psyche that Everly can’t remember a time when it wasn’t at the front of her mind. She loved her parents, still does even though they’re gone, but looking back she can admit that wasn’t the most healthy way of parenting two daughters.

Reflecting on last night, Everly can’t think of even one instance when she was worried that someone might see her. Carrie has explained how much of the way she was raised has impacted her view of herself, so Everly has a clear understanding on where much of her self-doubt and anxiety in social situations comes from. This is why she’s so surprised at her behavior with Asim. She’s been literally covered in dirt and mud, for crying out loud. It’s unfathomable, out of character, and entirely amazing.

She feels more herself than she ever has before, in large part thanks to Asim’s steady and soothing demeanor. It’s a precious gift she never knew she was missing until now.

Everly thinks back to how Addison mentioned feeling like she can’t truly be herself, that she doesn’t know who she is. Everly is struck by a bolt of guilt, realizing she wasn’t there for Addison when she probably most needed a big sister. Since Addison is a few years younger, her experience with their parents was different. Everly determines to make up for it now as best she can.

Checking her phone, she sees it’s almost time for their video call. Addison had texted her that morning asking if they could schedule a time to talk, assuring it was nothing bad, but she wanted to chat face to face. Everly is a little nervous, having no idea what it’s about, but knowing it isn’t bad eases much of the anxiety she would have otherwise felt.

Her phone rings a few minutes later and she connects through her laptop. Everly smiles at her sister’s face filling her computer screen. They make the usual small talk, chatting and laughing about the crazy trends they’ve seen online, what the youth are up to these days, random other small things, until Everly can’t wait any longer.

“So what’s the big deal? What did you want to talk about?”

Addison looks down, and Everly gets the sense she’s fidgeting with something out of sight.

“Whatever it is, you can tell me," she says, trying on what she hopes is a comforting, sisterly smile.

“Well, you remember how we talked about me coming back to visit again…” Addison trails off.

“Of course, I’d love that.” In her head, Everly is already planning possible outings, including the spa, cocktails in hand, of course.

“Okay, cool. Well, yeah. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Everly tries to hide her confusion; her normally chipper, bubbly sister is acting odd in a way she can’t quite figure out.

“Alright, did you want to check dates or something?” she asks.

“Sure, that’d be great.” Addison’s voice is still too high. They compare calendars, and Addison checks flights while they do so. They land on a weekend about a month away at the end of March, but something still feels off. Addison is avoiding the camera, and isn’t nearly as talkative as she usually is.

“What’s going on, Ad? You’re worrying me," Everly says.

“It’s just…” she trails off, taking a breath before looking up and starting again in a rush. “I was wondering if I could stay with you?” Her eyes flare wide and she drops them, looking back at her lap.

Everly realizes this was the hard part for her. Addison was worried about asking to stay at the house instead of the hotel.

“Of course! Please, stay with me! Of course you can, Ad. Oh this is going to be so fun.” Addison’s head snaps back up and a smile stretches across her face when she sees Everly’s excitement.

“Yeah?” she asks.

“Hell yeah! I’d love that.” The sisters are beaming at each other, excitement radiating through the screens, a beacon strengthening the connection between them.

“Okay, let’s do it.” Addison clicks around on her computer before turning back to Everly. “It’s done. Flights are booked and car is rented.”

“I can’t wait. We can do all the girly stuff we never got to do…” Everly is the one to trail off this time, her face falling. Addison’s smile falls too as they both realize what she was about to say.

“Ad. I’m really sorry," Everly says. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you. I regret it so much, I don’t know what to say or how to make it up to you but I’m so incredibly sorry.” Her eyes turn glassy with unshed tears. She wants her sister to understand, but there simply aren’t words for it.

“It’s okay, Ev," Addison says, her voice soft with aching sadness. “I’m sorry, too. It takes two, and neither of us reached out. I regret it, too. I missed you every day. We both lost mom and dad, but we also lost each other, and that hurt just as much.”

Everly is nodding along with her, matching tears streaking down their cheeks. They feel like good tears, though. They’re purging, renewing, making way for the healing and love that she senses is coming now that they’ve reconnected.

“I want to be there for you now, like a big sister should be.”

“I want that too. From now on, we will always be there for each other, pinky promise.” Addison gifts her a watery smile, and Everly does her best to return it. The guilt and remorse are still there; the regret and hurt aren’t gone, but she senses the burden lightening.

“Thank you," Addison says, after a few beats of quiet. “I wish I could give you a hug.”

Everly sobs a half snort, her emotions an absolute mess, and thankfully her nose was already covered by a tissue or she’d have snot on her keyboard.

“I wish I could hug you too," she says. “My therapist says we get some happy chemicals from hugging ourselves. Maybe if I give me a hug, and you give you a hug, we can still kind of be hugging each other?”

“Yes,” Addison says, “I like that.” She wraps her arms around herself and Everly follows suit, squeezing tightly and rocking herself back and forth.

When they let go, they both grab fresh tissues and swipe under their eyes.

“We are a mess.” Addison laughs, pointing out some mascara that has somehow made it onto Everly’s chin. They clean up as best they can through the video.

“I’ll have your room ready. It probably needs a clean," Everly says.

“Sounds good.” Addison is smiling again. “Can’t wait to see you in person again.”

They hang up and Everly heaves a sigh to rule all sighs, tipping her head back against her chair and closing her eyes. She takes a moment to try to sort through her feelings, not having anticipated that emotional rollercoaster when she got up today. Letting out the emotions and thoughts that had been festering for the last eight years hurt, but it was also cathartic. She feels lighter, and with a pang of worry, she wonders how much lighter she can feel before she dissipates entirely.

Everly pushes that bizarre thought aside. Feeling lighter must be a good thing. She’s heard it’s a good thing, anyways, but figures this is another anxious thought to add to her list for Carrie. Between Addison and Asim, her emotions have been completely foreign the last few weeks, and although that’s scary, it also feels good. She likes herself for the first time in years, and she’s happy with the choices she’s making with those around her.

Opening her eyes again, she checks her phone to see a message from Asim.

Asim: Hey, what would you like to do for the ground cover on the terracing? I have mulch, if that’s what you want, but personally I think river rocks or even pea gravel would look nicer. Here are a couple examples.

Everly scans her eyes down and sees that he has attached a few images from landscaping websites and her heart swells, grateful for his thoughtfulness to include them so she doesn’t have to google river rock or pea gravel. She swipes through the sample photos he linked before replying.

Everly: I think you’re right, I like how the river rocks look. Would it be possible to do a couple bigger ones too? Like accent boulders?

Asim: Yes, great idea. I’ll reach out to my supplier and see what we can do.

Everly sends him a quick thanks and closes the text thread, knowing he’s at work and not wanting to distract him further. She’s taken up enough of his time lately. She stands and stretches, rotating her shoulders and craning her neck to release some of the tension from her body before getting back to work on the stack of papers that has somehow grown bigger in the last few hours she’s been there.

To her surprise, she gets another text from Asim about an hour later.

Asim: Good news - he has plenty in stock and can deliver it later this week. I asked him to bring some guys with him and get it laid out for you when they deliver. Our work is done!

Everly: Wow, that’s awesome! Thanks! How should we celebrate?

Asim: I think we both know the answer to that… I’ll confirm delivery for Friday then?

Everly: Sounds good. Thank you!

Asim: Happy to help, Ever. Talk to you soon *winking emoji*

Everly bites her lip, then her eyes crinkle, and then her whole face smiles. She’s really proud of the work they’ve done together. Once the rocks are delivered, she wants to have him over for a proper dinner date on the patio so they can enjoy the fruits of their labor and take in the beautiful new terracing—without being covered in dirt.

Instead of getting back to work, Everly sets to planning.