Primal God (The Defiant God Brotherhood #4)

5. Now

5

NOW

Lilith

I tap the toe of my shoe against the black and white tiled floor of the diner that Joao Santos asked me to meet him at. I have to admit, I was shocked when he texted. Even more shocked when he said he wanted to meet at our old spot. But he didn’t give me much more than that to go on, so here I am.

There’s a part of me that’s worried.

What if his father is here?

What if they know?

The bell over the door rings and I look over to find Joao and a pretty redhead walking toward me. I’ve seen them around campus a few times since he moved back, but I haven’t officially met her.

Joao leans in, giving me a quick hug. He’s more muscular than he was five years ago. Taller, too. But when he smiles, I see the same boy that I first fell for and smile back.

“Hey, Lili. This is Eve, my girlfriend.”

The irony that her name is the opposite of mine isn’t lost on me.

I take Eve’s outstretched hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too. I’ve heard so many good things about you from Joao.”

I gesture to the table. “Sit! I’ve already put in an order for fries with a side of ranch.”

Joao grins. “You remembered.” To Eve, he says, “Lili and I used to come here all the time. I think we almost ate them out of ranch dressing at one point.”

Eve’s nose crinkles adorably. “Babe, I didn’t know you liked fried foods.”

“I don’t eat them as much as I used to, but I like to indulge every now and again.” To me, he says, “I’ve really tried to watch what I put in my body since I started medical school. Seeing what grease can do to your heart is terrifying.”

“How are you liking it?”

“It’s good. Different, but good. That’s where I met Eve, actually. We have a few classes together. What about you? Did you ever graduate?”

My cheeks are warm because he’s right. I should have already graduated by now.

I say, “I took a year off, so I graduate next year.”

He holds out his knuckles for me to bump.

“Right on! Still doing childcare?”

“Bachelor of Science in Child Studies,” I correct with a smile.

He and Eve share a look.

“Okay, that was a bit weird,” I say.

Joao laughs. “Sorry. It’s just, this is too perfect.”

“What is?”

“You and your degree.”

“Care to elaborate?”

He puts both of his hands on the table, leaning forward. “I think you should work for my dad this summer.”

“I’m sorry. You think I should do what ?”

“Work for my dad. He could use the help this summer with the little ones.”

I glance at Eve. “Did he bump his head?”

She snorts. “A fair question, but no.”

Joao says, “I’m serious.”

“So am I, because that’s the only reason I can think of that explains why you would even ask me to call your dad.”

“Lili, I think you’re being a bit dramatic. Besides, we broke up years ago. I’m sure my dad doesn’t even remember seeing us hooking up.”

No, he might not remember that, but Dr. Santos might remember when we hooked up…

Eve’s lips make an ‘o’. “Did Mr. S. really catch the two of you having sex?”

I nod, my cheeks heating.

“I would die. He’s so…intense.”

Intense is definitely the word I’d use to describe him. Intense and sexy. I blink, feeling like I’ve just been zapped by electricity.

Spurred by my most recent thought, I say, “Calling him sounds like a terrible idea.”

“Come on, Lili. You’re like the only person qualified to help. Plus, I’m worried about him. Ever since Mom passed, he’s buried himself with work.”

Guilt licks at my skin. It sounds like Dr. Santos still isn’t dealing with the death of his wife, which is why I won’t be calling him.

His tone takes on a serious tone. “It’s affecting the kids.”

That makes me feel bad. Clara and Diego were only babies the last time I saw them, which would make them five now. I’ve never even met Isadora, but know she’s around sixteen months old. My breath hitches in my throat. Ten months older than…

“Surely your father has the means to hire a qualified nanny.”

Joao says, “Oh, he’s hired one, alright, and she’s horrible.”

Eve adds, “She really is scary. Even Isadora hates her, and Isadora loves everyone.”

I ask Joao, “Why can’t you help? Why me?”

“I can’t help because I’m going out of the country for the summer.”

“How nice,” I say, sarcasm dripping in my tone.

“It’s not like that, Lili.” He gestures to his girlfriend. “We’re going to help build houses in a third world country.”

Eve adds, “He’s not mentioning that we’re staying with his family, so it’s not like we’re going to be roughing it.”

Okay, that checks out.

“Come on. I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t think you could help. Besides, the pay is killer.”

I absolutely hate that the money is the only reason I’m even semi-considering this. God knows I could use as much money as I can get…

“And what happens when summer is over? Your father will still be nanny-less.”

“But you’re giving him time to find the perfect person. Heck, you might even know the perfect person with all of your connections. Please, just say you’ll call him.”

I bite back a groan. Finally, I say, “I’ll call.”

“You are the best! Here’s his number.” He slides a business card toward me. “Now, we’ve got to run. We’re meeting some friends at the country club.”

I’m frowning when they leave. I guess some things haven’t changed that much. Joao still has a golden spoon in his mouth, and I don’t. If anything, my situation is worse.

Maybe I won’t call his dad after all.

Two hours later, I’m back at my apartment, my phone to my ear.

“This is Dr. Santos.”

“Hi Dr. Santos. This is Lili Wolfe. Joao said you might be looking for some help this summer with your younger children.”

There’s silence on the other end. I glance at my phone to make sure the call hasn’t dropped.

“Dr. Santos? Are you there?”

“Yes, I’m here.”

Goosebumps lift on my skin as he speaks. God. I’d forgotten how deep his voice is. How his slight accent is sexy as hell…

“Oh, good,” I ramble. “Just didn’t want to be talking to dead air or something.”

As soon as the word ‘dead’ leaves my lips, I want to crawl into a hole and hide.

For the love of god, Lili, the man’s wife died a year ago and you know he’s struggling with it!

He says, “I have some time tonight. If you’re free, perhaps we can meet up and I’ll tell you what I’m in need of.”

Illicit images of Dr. Santos flash through my mind, mostly centered around the night in the hotel bathroom, which honestly feels like a fever dream sometimes. Like, did it even happen? But I know it happened… I have the proof.

“Ms. Wolfe? Are you there?”

“Yup! Still here. What time would you like me?”

“Seven.”

“Are you still at the same address?”

“I am.”

“Perfect. See you at seven.”

I end the call and then freak out.

What in the heck was I thinking calling him? One, what if he decides someone who will have a quickie in a bathroom isn’t fit to take care of his kids? Two, it’s going to be super awkward working for him when I still have a crush on him. Maybe I’ll get lucky. Maybe he’s not devastatingly handsome anymore. The thought sends me into action, and I google his name. Recent photos appear, and I groan. Because Dimitri Santos has somehow gotten even hotter since I last saw him.

“Like a fine wine,” I mutter to myself.

It’s not fair, really. He looks like a god, while I’ve gained weight. The thought has me snorting softly to myself. Of course, I have a reason for some of my weight gain. I stand, going to the crib in the corner of the room, where Raquel is sleeping.

My sweet girl is the spitting image of her father…

A tap on the door has me turning.

“Everything okay?”

I shake my head. “No. Are you free, or do you have to go to work?”

Cecely says, “I’ve got some time.” She nods her head toward the living room. “Let’s sit and talk.”

I follow her to the living room, sitting next to her on the couch.

“Well, what did the ex want?”

“He told me his dad needs a live-in nanny for the summer.”

“Did you tell him to get fucked?”

That makes me smile. “No.”

“Lili, please tell me you didn’t call that prick?” When I say nothing, she sighs. “Okay, so you called. What did Dimitri-the-dick have to say?”

Cecely is one of the few people who knows everything .

“Not much. Just that he needs a nanny and that he wants to meet at seven tonight to discuss the position.”

Cecely is silent for a moment. I’m sure she’s wondering if I’ve lost my mind. Heck, I’m wondering, too.

Finally, she says, “I can watch Raquel while you go.”

“What?”

“Well, I’m sure you don’t want to take her. Right?”

“So you think I should go?”

Her gaze searches mine. “You know how I feel. I think you ought to let him know about her and then sue his ass for child support.” She holds up her hands when I open my mouth to reply. “But I also know how you feel about him. So, yeah, I think you should go to the interview. Let him pay you to take care of his kids and I can keep an eye on this one.”

My eyes water. “That’s asking too much. I can’t.”

“You can. I have some money saved up from dancing. We’ll make this work.” She points toward the wall. “Besides, you know Harvey will help.”

Our other roommate, Harvey, loves watching Raquel. He says it’s because he was raised with ten siblings, but I know it’s because he’s a good guy. Plus, he says he likes the practice for when he and his boyfriend have their own kids one day.

I lean over, hugging her. “You’re the best.”

“No, you are.” She gives me a long look. “Just promise me you won’t sleep with him.”

I laugh. “I won’t.”

She hums under her breath, but says nothing else about Dimitri Santos. Instead, she asks, “Are you ready for the test on Monday?”

“I think so.”

“Girl don’t lie. I know you’re stressed.”

Raquel was sick the other day, and I missed class. Unfortunately for me, it’s one of the more tough classes and I’ve had a hard time catching up. I’m worried that I’m going to fail the test which will make me fail the class.

“Fine. I’m stressed.”

“That’s what I thought. Which is why I’m going to watch my favorite baby while you study before the interview.”

“Cec—”

Cecely holds up her hand. “Oh, this isn’t for free, because I’m totally going to raid your closet while you’re gone.”

“Deal.”

Cecely grabs the baby monitor while I gather my things. I also change into an appropriate outfit for an interview. Once I’m ready, I check on Raquel one last time before heading out.

I’m usually at the library on Thursdays when I don’t have to work. Cecely is off and can keep the baby for me. I repay her by doing her laundry, which she hates. I’m definitely getting the better end of the deal because I love doing laundry and I also love getting time away from Raquel to study.

In the library, I find a table in a corner and sit.

“Okay, Lili. Let’s do this,” I say, hyping up myself.

An hour later, I’m deep in thought when a shadow settles over me.

“Is this seat taken?”

Glancing up, I find an attractive man looking down at me with a smile on his face. He’s tall, with short, dark hair and light grey eyes that pop against his brown skin. Holy moly, he’s really good looking. Like, he could be a model.

He gestures to the chair, making my cheeks flame. Right! He asked if the seat was taken.

“It’s free.”

He sits across from me. “I’m Adam.”

“Nice to meet you, Adam. I’m Lilith, but you can call me Lili.”

“Like from the bible. Rock on.”

I snort. “I don’t think Lilith technically made the bible, but it’s cool that you know about her.”

“So, Lilith-not-from-the-bible, why haven’t I seen you around?”

“I’ve been around,” I say with a grin. “But I usually work on Thursdays.”

“And where do you work?”

“Which job?”

“Damn. An entrepreneur. I like it.”

“More like a broke student who’s trying to make rent.”

And pay for diapers and formula.

“I feel it.”

“To answer your question, I usually work at the bookstore off fifth and then at a coffee shop around the corner from here. Original, I know.”

“Very original. I, on the other hand, am an anomaly.”

“Oh?”

“I’m a spoiled rich kid who is living with his folks for free while I go to college.”

“Ah, I see. Let me guess. You’re also an only child.”

He winces. “Wrong. I have two older brothers.”

“The baby.” I nod. “It’s all making sense.”

“What about you?”

My chest is tight. “I had a younger sister, but she passed away.”

“Oh, damn. I’m sorry.”

There’s a beat of awkward silence, where I’m sure I’m supposed to reassure him it’s fine.

So, I say, “It was a long time ago.”

“Still doesn’t make it any easier, I’m sure.” He reaches across the table, grasping my hand for a moment. “I’m truly sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you.” Needing to get this conversation moving in a different direction, I ask, “So, what brings you to the library today?”

This makes him groan. “An unfortunate mission from my father, I’m sad to say.”

“Wow. Cryptic.”

“I’m totally joking. I just need to do some reading for a class and my mom hovers when I’m at home. A Nigerian mother through and through.”

“I see. So you escaped to the library for some peace?”

“Indeed.” He leans forward. “And I found myself a damsel. Tell me, Lili, do you need rescuing?”

“Maybe. Guess you’ll have to find out, Adam.”

I don’t date often, mostly because I’m too busy trying to just get by. In my experience, guys get tired when you have to blow them off to pick up an extra shift to ensure you make rent. And if my crazy work schedule doesn’t turn them off, finding out that I have a six-month-old baby does.

But I’m also tired of being lonely, and Adam seems like a nice guy.

“Does this mean I get your phone number?”

“Sure.”

He unlocks his phone, and I rattle off my number. A moment later, my phone buzzes as a text comes through.

Unknown

This is Adam.

Your new best friend.

Best friend, eh? I like the sound of that.

Do you? I’m glad.

I snort. “Are we really texting across the table to each other?”

“Isn’t that what all the kids do these days?”

“Whoa, you’re sounding like my grandpa there.”

Not exactly true, since I don’t actually have a grandfather, but he gets the idea because he laughs.

“I did sound like Bàbá àgbà, didn’t I?”

“ Bàbá àgbà ?” I try to say the words the same way he did, but I don’t think I succeeded.

“It’s ‘grandfather’ in Yoruba.”

“I’m jealous, and not just because you speak another language.”

“No grandfather?”

I shake my head. “Nope. No family, sadly.”

Other than my baby. The thought has me pausing. What’s the etiquette for telling someone you have a kid? First date?

“Damn. I’m sorry.”

“It is what it is.”

“Well, I know I’m not family yet, but a friend is a second close, right?”

“Yet? Wow, you’re awfully confident.”

He gives me a small smile. “You have no idea.”

“Well, friend , I hate to cut this short, but I need to run.”

“Should I be worried?”

I glance at him. “What do you mean?”

“Are you leaving to go on a date?” He taps his smartwatch, showing the time.

I snort out a laugh. “Not a date. It’s a job interview.”

“But…you already have two jobs.”

“I know.” I stand, gathering my things. “I like to stay busy.”

“Damn. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Well, Adam, it was nice to meet you.”

“You, too, Lili.” He smiles up at me. “I look forward to seeing you again.”

I say nothing and walk away. When I get to the door, I find him turned in his seat watching me, a smile still on his handsome face.

And when my phone buzzes, I already know it’s him.