Promise Me (Asher Family #1)

Chapter 9

CHAPTER NINE

SADIE

The clock next to Hudson’s bed reads four in the morning.

4:00 a.m.

Who the hell wakes up this early? Oh, that’s right. Me. I do.

I sigh and roll over, inhaling the wintergreen scent of his bedroom.

Oh, it smells so good in here.

Is it totally weird that I’m lying in Hudson’s bed?

Why yes, yes, it is.

Do I still prefer being here over being at home?

Why yes, yes, I do.

Last night, after Hudson changed the sheets and told me the bed was ready when I wanted it, we sat in his living room together in complete silence since I wasn’t ready for bed yet. I got up a few times, looking at the pictures and knickknacks on his shelves. I opened the cabinets in his kitchen until I found a plate and made my own serving of spaghetti. I even grabbed a bag of baked chips from his snack drawer and ate half the bag while reading one of the thriller books from his mini bookshelf .

And guess what? Aside from a curious look here and there as he watched me, he said not one word to me.

It was the perfect night.

The only part that would have made the night better would have been if he hadn’t put a shirt on when he was changing the sheets.

I haven’t seen Hudson shirtless since we were teenagers, and even though it’s a given at this point, holy hell, is he all man now.

All rippled abs and solid muscle.

The way his gym shorts hung loose on his hips is forever posted to my brain.

It’s clear we still hate each other, but wow, he sure is nice to look at.

Quietly, I get out of bed, slip on my shoes, and open his bedroom door.

I spot his feet hanging over the edge of the couch. A small piece of me feels bad because he clearly can’t be sleeping well on that thing, but it was his choice.

I tiptoe into the kitchen and open the fridge. The light comes out brightly, so I press my body against it as a shield and glance over my shoulder.

He hasn’t moved.

I reach in and grab a bottle of water, slowly closing the door. Then I grab a protein bar from the snack drawer I found last night and continue to sneak to the door. I click the lock, look over my shoulder again, and when it’s clear that he still hasn’t stirred, I exit his apartment and retreat down the stairs.

I step out into the early morning, the air already warm as I move to the bakery’s back door. I take my chances on the code for the digital pad.

2019

The pad light turns green, and the door unlocks .

So, I never changed the passcode after my mom died. Got it.

I step into the back and instantly feel a rush of emotions.

It’s her bakery, but it’s different. There are different pictures and signs. The shelf where she kept her ingredients is on the opposite side. The swinging door is white versus her dark oak one, and it has a diamond window to look into the front of the bakery. I slowly make my way to it but stop to look at the counters. It’s so clean in here. Mom would have had flour and who knows what else strung all over the place by this time of the morning.

I’m still staring at the empty counters when someone clears their throat behind me.

My arms flail as I spin around.

“Jesus, Hudson. What are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” he repeats.

“I’m …” Whatever I was going to say just disappears. I toss my hands up and shake my head. “I don’t know.”

He nods a slow nod and then leans his hip onto the desk by the back door.

I assume he’s going to say something, but he doesn’t.

“I can be down here alone,” I snap.

Another nod. “True, but that doesn’t mean you should have to be.”

I narrow my gaze at him.

“I might cry again,” I say to scare him away.

“Yeah, I thought as much.”

“Isn’t that your cue to leave?”

“Not today. I had an entire night to think it over.”

“Think what over?”

“You.”

I cross my arms. “You spent the night thinking of me.” My hand hits my heart. “You shouldn’t have. ”

Suddenly, my hand placement reminds me of how he helped me in the hospital.

“I’m sorry I woke you up,” I say in an attempt to tone down my sarcasm.

“Oddly enough, I didn’t sleep much. It turns out that couch isn’t good for anything except watching TV.”

“Sorry about that, too.”

His gaze connects with mine, and silence falls over us. His eyes darken to a deep blue as they study me, but it’s his bedhead that makes me smile. I sort of like this sleepy Hudson look.

Normally, as a kid, I would fill this time with something snarky, but it’s been three years. Is that still us?

“Do we still bicker?” I turn to the front of the bakery. I made it this far; I may as well rip the Band-Aid on this entire place.

“Yes,” he answers, following behind me.

“Do people still avoid us for it?”

“Yes.” He chuckles.

“What would I say to you right now about following me?”

“You’d tell me fuck off.”

I grin, even though he can’t see it.

“Good. Would you listen?”

“Yeah, but I’d probably have some rude comment in reply, though.”

I stop suddenly in the middle of the room and take it in.

Nothing is the same as what my mother had, except for the table in the corner.

I’ve painted the walls and bought new shelves, tables, counters, and more.

A lump forms in my throat, and I swear it moves to my heart, stopping everything.

I gasp, my hand lifting to cover my mouth.

I erased her.

The tears hit me instantly, and just as my knees give out, Hudson’s arms wrap around me, catching my fall. He holds me to him as we settle on the floor.

His hand cups the back of my head as each breath rakes through me.

“Shhh,” he says. “Deep breaths, remember.”

“She’s gone,” I say, my hand now clutching his shirt. “And I didn't leave anything in here to remember her.”

“Yes, you did,” he says quickly. “Look at the wallpaper behind the new shelves.”

I’m still crying, but I look where he tells me.

“I was pissed at Linc for asking. Naturally, you were more than I was, but I helped put it in there anyway. It’s on the bottom of the checkout counter, too, see.”

He’s telling the truth. Mom’s wallpaper is there.

My tears slow down.

“And the front doorframe.” I follow where he points. “You left that in that dark oak trim she loved so much.”

“She would hate that I did that,” I say with a laugh.

“Yeah, you said that when you did it, too.”

Our eyes connect then, and something unfamiliar passes through us.

Peace, maybe?

An unspoken agreement of some kind.

“It’s a lot right now, I get it, but maybe on another day, you’ll come back here and see all the spots where you left your mom. You honored her really nicely, Sadie. She’d be so proud of you.”

The air around us buzzes then as silence fills the room.

A few minutes pass as I pull myself together. I whisper, “I wish I could remember her funeral.”

“Yeah, I know you do.”

“Were you there?”

I look up into his eyes just as he shakes his head.

“I wasn’t. I hadn’t been released from the hospital yet. ”

He was in the hospital?

“Why? What happened to you?”

With my tears now controlled, he moves away from me and stands. I do the same so as not to be weird and sit on the floor while he talks.

He scratches the back of his neck as he takes a breath.

Clearly, whatever it is, it’s hard for him to talk about. I have no doubt it’ll answer all my questions on why he’s back in Lovers, but I also get not wanting to talk about yourself—more than he knows.

I wave my hand in the air.

“You don't have to tell me. I know we don’t have that kind of relationship, and you probably already told me anyway, so it’s no fun for you to have this conversation twice.”

“Actually,” he says, “you never asked about it. I assumed Linc told you at some point, but this conversation between us has never happened.”

I wrinkle my nose. “We really still don’t like each other?”

He just shrugs.

“Since I have nothing to lose—or nothing more to lose—I’ll admit that I’ve always told myself that if you ever came back, I’d make amends.”

“Seriously?” he says as if he doesn’t believe me.

“Yep. Clearly, I changed my mind.”

“Clearly.” He chuckles.

I smile at the sound. I think I could enjoy being friends with Hudson Asher.

“So, are you going to tell me what happened?” I ask again.

His mouth opens, but he closes it and points at the coffee machine instead.

“Let’s make a cup first. The sun is barely out, you know.”

“Okay,” I say, and I watch as he takes over.

Mom would have loved to see this .

Me and Hudson, mingling like normal humans.

He makes two cups, handing me one that is more creamer with coffee than coffee with creamer.

“How do you know how I like my coffee?” I ask as we sit at a table by the front window.

“Took a guess from when I’d spend weekends at your house in high school. Your dad would always be mad that the creamer was gone. You’d run and hide.”

I laugh and take a sip. I almost spit it out.

“Oh god, that’s sweet.”

“Too much?” he asks.

“Let me try yours,” I say, grabbing his mug before he can reply. I sip and then sigh with a happiness I can't describe. “I think my taste buds have changed.”

Hudson doesn’t say anything. He just stares at his cup.

I pass it back without a word. “So, tell me the story while I get myself a new cup.”

Oddly enough, when I reach for a new mug and the coffee to scoop out, I know exactly where it is. Is that muscle memory?

“It’s a short story, really. Two days before your mom's funeral, I was in a game. The blade from someone on the opposing team’s skate hit the back of my left knee in just the right spot where my gear couldn’t stop it.”

“Fuck,” I say, slamming my cup down and wincing. “Ouch.”

His lips twitch into a brief smile. My reaction must take Hudson by surprise.

“Yeah, ouch.”

“How long were you in the hospital?” I ask, my new cup hot and ready as I rejoin him at the table.

“It was long enough for them to tell me that would be my last game as a professional hockey player.”

Another gasp hits me .

“But … hockey was your dream, and you were so freaking good at it.”

He smiles. “You watched me play?”

“How could I not? You were mesmerizing out there.”

Oh god, he was never supposed to know that. I sit up taller.

I’m about to say something to steer the conversation away because the way he’s smiling at me makes me feel funny, but someone hits the window outside.

We both jump and look at my brother. His brows are furrowed, and his hands are on his hips.

“What the hell?” Linc shouts loud enough for us to hear through the window. He points at the door.

I open it for him and calmly return to my seat.

I can feel the fumes radiating from my brother. It’s probably because he’s up so damn early for who knows what reason.

“I told you to call me if she tries to come to work.” Linc points at Hudson.

“She’s not working.”

I almost laugh, but I hold it together.

“We’re drinking coffee,” I say, holding my cup up. “Do you want me to make you some?”

Linc’s gaze bounces between me and Hudson.

“It’s almost five in the morning, Sadie. You should be asleep. Let’s go.”

“No.”

“Why are you here so early?” Hudson asks him.

“I thought I could check on her and she wouldn’t notice, so imagine my surprise when I see you two sitting here on your little coffee date.”

I roll my eyes at my brother.

“I snuck down here, and he followed me. That’s it.”

“Well, let’s go. You need to relax and have no stress, and this?— ”

“The only person adding stress to my life is you, Linc. I’m staying with Hudson.”

“What?” they both ask at the same time.

“I’m not going home with you. Hudson’s place is … calming.”

“Calming,” Hudson says with disbelief, but he’s smiling.

“I’m not going to fight you, Sadie. I’ll just move back to my place.”

I shake my head. “For a day, and then you’ll move right back in and take over again. Nope. I’m staying with Hudson.”

Linc looks at his best friend, and so do I.

Hudson shrugs.

“Yeah, cool.”

“Fucking unreal,” Linc says and walks out.

Hudson watches him go and then looks back at me, shaking his head.

I smile. “Weird. Usually, I’m the Collins storming off in this trio, yeah?”

Hudson’s deep laugh surrounds me as he stands.

“Come on, roomie, let’s lock up.”

I think I like being on Team Hudson.